Joined: 27 October 2012
Joined: 13 May 2011
Joined: 27 September 2008
Sach hue sapne tere ..i wish my other dreams also come true ..but its wonderful to read ur comments ..Haah! So with my term paper submitted I'm in full form chalo lets start!!!
Hmmm so you wanted to name it "woh humsafar tha"...not bad infact I loved the title..me too loved it ..as far the song is concerned anytime I'll chose it over Ishq wala Love esp after that flying kiss wala..lol..you are so jealous ..infact you should be ..that's why i had sent u the link specifically emphasizing on the flying kiss part VM. But still as title, I would say good or rather wise decision rose. "who humsafar tha" as you yourself said is intense, and has a melancholic effect with goes well with the drama yet this title also acknowledges supriya whereas "Ishq wala love" has only n only to do with tasha, a man who loves his wife, his marriage,,, how he fells into ISHQ!! So about the chapter...wow, you have woven a very heart touching and convincing tale for Nakusha I mean for a lady who didn't knew that ganpat was nakusha's step father even after the show ended could come up with such update!..thanks for this taunting compliment ..but was it so imp to know that ganpat was her step father On a serious note I loved the background you assigned for her, it's actually heart wrenching but moreover the poverty , the failed marriage and broken dreams, it's nakusha's spirit in which she took things, is what left me teary,..thanks a lot and that's one thing which is throughout keeping a bottam line resemblance (despite all loudness and OTT approach) between ur nakushha and the one we witnessed on the screen! Clearly she is not happy but she choses to keep her sorrow to herself only!..bingo
I loved the way supriya tried to keep an upper hand while negotiating with nakusha and this nakusha ullu gadhi kahin ki...hw can she think that supriya ka pati ussko bachcha nahin de sakta...pagal aurat supriya ka pati chahe to puri duniya ki auraaton ko bachcha de sakta hai!..now this is hilariously true ..i couldnt stop laughing ..bechara dutta But supriya is quite intelligent I like her she is well aware of his husband capabilities she knows for him ek ball hi kafi hai to hit a six..if he was such a good player then why did she herself got clean bowled ..her time empire said 'no ball' kya?. on a serious note very very calculative move rosie very wise ek toh the way dutta is reacting his "one night stand' he can't afford to do that on regualr basis..even if he decides or i decide for him to do on a regular basis u will surely have several heart attacks ..and i don;t want that to happen and another thing is now whenever they'll be close or intimate or have soft moments it would be free from 'we are here to make a baby" thing! Romance ke liye darwaaze khule hain..do u seriously wanna see dutta sups romance
Liked the clinical bit..nthing is lost if u dnt add them bt when added these bits make the backdrop more convincing and readers are throughout reminded the central idea!
And the last part..bravo rose must have been a lil difficult coz had it been picturized on screen I'm sure Mishal would have been done it quite convincingly but to make us imagine it equally convincingly must be difficult...honestly speaking it wasn't that difficult ..dutta shrugging off women comes quite naturally to him..lol..! And I must thank Mishal also I mean the expression he gave during the sequence where naku is her fair avatar wearing a yellow saree hugs him and the way he cringes.yeah he was like yeh toh gale hi pad gayi ..I was throughout remembering that scene!!
Joined: 27 September 2008
Ch 3:..wow back to back comments ..i am not complaining
I wanted to mention this in the last comment only but though to merge it in this only!! I loved to see that this time they both are prejudiced towards each other...yup there is zero level of attraction between them this time .. unlike the show where they both gave each other a fair chance (the initial friendship phase). The shattered expression..she feels humiliated or better say reaction of naku after being thrown out of the room was superb,..thanks for that matter her reaction towards dutta's hatred and obnoxious behavior towards her is superb''...thanks again till she is only concerned about her feelings oblivious to whats going on in his mind to understand his behavior .she doesn't felt bad at her austere behavior of course she was irritated but it was when he thought low of her she actually felt bad, she's seeking respect, not a good sign for a prostitute...agreed she is a pros but that doesn't allow anybody to insult her and that too 3 times in a row ..primarily because in this case its his wife who has brought her here so if he has issues then he should settle with sups n not her So, it's supriya who told naku's murky past to dutta, I won't say narrated bcoz I'm hoping naku will do that (nt exactly narrating her story yet simple short conversation may be..don't wory, hopefully they will have several conversations ) yaar aisa pati kahan milta hai mujhe bhi chahiye'only in fan fictions ..sweetu bahut bahut bahut achche he only deserves me'..nt only nakusha even I was dumbstruck with his loyalty! I loved to see this high tempered dutta and for once he was angry for a genuine cause, most of the time he has been angry for wrong reasons on wrong people'''and that makes me remember hw dutta vented his frustration on naku''one regular trait of dutta when angry needs a punching bag, and that's where supriya is loosing only very special people in dutta's life gets this privilege of being "the punching bag"!..well said
What? She gave naku the saree he gifted her''..is she nuts, even if he look at my saree I won't give it to anybody'''.yahi hota jiknepass jo hota hai uski koi kadar hi nahi''''.dekh lo bhagwan!shuru drama
And now my fav part'..I loved loved loved everything the way he decides to make love with her''.and i am so glad u felt it was the right time ..1stly i wanted him to be in his senses no drunk act plzz its a complete turn off for me ..2ndly i didnt want him to be attracted towards her and lastly i didnt wish them to make out in weird circumstances like stuck in a jungle on a rainy night ...it was so right on spot, a woman facing the toughest situation has this privelge of crying and blaming others for her plight but as a man they constantly need to prove to the world and themselves as well that they are doing fine''..and dutta follows this trait quite strongly!!..thanks a lot Another thing which I loved is'''dutta has this trait of constantly seeing himself in bad light, he needs somebody to contradict this notion of his that too frequently,..main hoon nah ..i will do it well we all knw that is for nakusha is for' but its quite clear that supriya hasn't yet realized this need of dutta!! I quite appreciate the subtle hints that constantly keeps appearing on the surface pointing that supriya might be a good wife but she clearly lacks a lot as a "lifepartner"!!!..yeah she is a shady character the way she moved backwards when he approached her, is it only me who smtimes caught a glimpse of the old nave nakusha? Loved the blood scene, indeed sm love stories hv blood on it...wow lovely line No matter hw much DSP try to behave like brutal cold gangster rahega wohi innocent bhola bhala..he is a sweet heart ..love him a lot ..mechanic dutta, who can't see anybody in pain! I have already stated you hw much I appreciate this part in the PM'''.so the only thing I want to add is ab lag raha that it's a rose FF..so late ? lol..never mind ..good u still think that its mine '''ab tak job hi tha that could be done by others too bt nw this what noday else you can do!!!! Loved the way instead of tender switch off lamp this time it was a crash!..i am touched ..thanks ..no wonder i wait for your comments
She could feel droplets on her face, whether they belonged to him or her, excellent !!!..thanks ..its difficult to make a love scene convincing when there is no love
And mujhe isstrong cheezein pasand hain, issh mujhe bhi!!...lol..
There's one more aspect left which I didn't pointed out bt will do with next ud's comment!!
Joined: 27 September 2008
Throwing the red towel hanging around his neck aside he picked up his black kurta and wriggled his head through it then pulled it down. He turned to reach for the waist coat but supriya went for it first, that's when he realized that she was also present in the room. She held the coat for him, his gaze travelled from the coat to her face and stayed there for some time before he lifted his arms to wear it. He busied himself in folding his sleeves when she came from behind to adjust his coat. Her worried eyes gazed at him to read his mind but his face didn't give away any expression. His mind was concentrating hard on the proposed meeting till he felt her fingers buttoning his kurta.
"main kar loonga." He said curtly holding her hands but she didn't stop, she buttoned all of them leaving just the first one open. Without meeting her eyes he tried to walk past her however she blocked his way and said," aapse kuch baat karni thi." Looking straight at the door behind he replied before taking a step forward," abhi nahin baad mein." She grabbed his arm to stop him and insisted," dutta ji ..bus do minute." He raised his hand and glanced at his loosely hung watch, he had some spare time but did he wish to spend it on her? pursing his lips he stood rigid, expecting her to get done with what she wanted to say.
" kal main nakusha ko hospital le kar gayi thi..aaj sham ko uski reports aayengi." He clenched his jaws firmly on hearing her, this was one thing that he was trying 24x7 to forget and was failing badly.
"bahut ghabhrahat ho rahi hai." She said anxiously, this was the last option in her hands, she'd pinned all her hopes and desires on this one. Leaning her head on his shoulder she continued," agar is baar bhi kuch galat hua..toh..toh main bhikhar jaungi." He curled his fingers in a fist and scrunched his nose, her anxiety, her apprehension, her fear all were real and genuine, he could feel them but what he felt, what he desired, she never understood. Till date she didn't realize his true feelings, instead of Us/Theirs there was always I, Me, Myself in her talks, even when she would use the word Us there would actually be no Us in it. Her hand travelled down his arm, forcing him to open his fist as she added further," mera sapna pura hoga nah?" and entwined her fingers with his expecting him to reassure her somehow. A part of him wanted to hold her, sooth her, comfort her like before and even wished that her dream came true because he knew that having a baby meant the world to her but today something from within him was holding him back, the concern and affection that he had in his heart for her were losing their sheen and he couldn't bring himself to fake those emotions anymore.
" mujhe der ho rahi hai." He said while jerking his hand from her hold and left the room without uttering another word.
Nakkusha's head was spinning seeing supriya pace up and down the hospital corridor, they had come half an hour before their appointed time and since then supriya was doing nothing other than walking around nervously. Chewing on her gum nakusha thought that today was a very crucial day for all of them especially for the lady in front of her who had put her marriage and her husband's desires at stake for this child. If things turned out as supriya had planned then all of them would be relieved, she would get a baby she craved for so long, sahab would also probably come around as what he did was only to save his marriage and extend his family and lastly with those ten lac rupees she wouldn't have to go back to that hell, she concluded.
Supriya saw a mother coming out of a room carrying her infant in her arms. Her heart filled with desire on seeing that cute little baby, she wondered would a day ever come when she'd hold his child in her hands? She had and was waiting impatiently for that day to arrive. She glanced at the women sitting on the bench outside the doctor's cabin, most of them appeared tensed. Someone or the other must be in the same position like hers, dying to experience the bliss of motherhood. She remembered the countless number of times she'd visited various doctors to get her infertility treated while at the same time there were young girls both married and unmarried who used to come to get their pregnancy terminated. It used to shatter her heart into pieces on seeing them give up such a beautiful gift gifted by God. Her thoughts got interrupted when a nurse called both of them in.
With bated breath both stepped inside where the doctor was waiting to give the reports. She offered the closed envelope to nakusha, who felt a lump form in her throat, before she could act, supriya grabbed it from doctor's hands. Nakusha gulped and looked in supriya's direction, her fingers were trembling, she closed her eyes and thought of Bappa before opening the envelope. Supriya forgot to breathe as she read the contents of the reports, it was only when her gaze fell on the words 'pregnancy test positive' that she took a deep breath. Slowly her lips stretched in a smile and she raised her head to look at the doctor who confirmed that nakusha was indeed pregnant. Her heart jumped with joy and a wave of happiness flowed through her body as she turned to glance at nakusha. Cupping her face with one hand supriya spoke through glistened eyes," tu nahin jaanti ..tune mujhe aaj kya diya hai." Nakusha stared blankly at those warmth and loved filled eyes, she didn't know how to react and for a moment everything seemed to black out.
" nakusha..shuru ke kuch mahine tumhein thodi saavdhani rakhni hogi." The doctor informed.
" aap chinta mat ki jiye ..main iska pura khayal rakhungi." Supriya assured and listened carefully to the instructions which the doctor was giving out whereas nakusha was still lost in her own world unable to believe that she was actually pregnant! that she was carrying someone's child in her womb! She lowered her head and touched her belly, the whole thing would take time to sink in. supriya one more time read the report and shook her head then took out a bundle of notes from her purse and gave it to the doctor.
" har report main nakusha ki jagah mera naam hoga aur yeh baat is kamre se bahar nahin jaani chaiye." Supriya dictated in a firm tone. The doctor smiled and nodded her head before replying," jee vaheni sahib."
When they'd entered the cabin similar emotions of anxiety and nervousness were running through them however when they came out, their feelings were different if supriya was ecstatic then nakusha was still in a daze, instead of the baby she thought there were butterflies in her stomach. Minutes ago she was hoping that she was pregnant and now, she was really pregnant!
After settling themselves in the car, supriya dialed dutta's number.
" dutta ji, aap abhi shiv mandir aa jaiye nah" supriya said excitedly.
" Par tum toh hospital gayi thi..yeh mandir kahan se beech mein aa gaya." He asked raising his brow.
" woh sab chodiye ..bus aap mandir aa jaiye." She couldn't contain her happiness and wished to break this news in the temple.
" mujhe abhi bahut kaam hai." He said in irritation, he had more important things to do than visit the temple.
" apka kaam ruk sakta hai par main nahin..aap bus aa jao."
He opened his mouth to protest but before that she'd already disconnected the call. He rolled his eyes, his wife was now getting on to his nerves. If she could act stubborn then so could he. He would go there only after finishing his meeting.
The car was stopped at a sweets shop where supriya bought several boxes of sweets before reaching the temple. The happiness and enthusiasm in her eyes were clearly visible to nakusha, she was glad that she could bring a smile on somebody's face. After getting out, supriya held one box and instructed the driver to distribute the rest of the boxes among the people of PV who'd gathered there on seeing her car arrive.
Nakusha climbed up a few steps along with supriya however she stopped in the middle on realizing something. Supriya looked at her in confusion to which nakusha said," taayi ..aap jao darshan karne ke liye..main yahin rukti hai." Supriya shrugged her shoulders and without questioning her further, stepped up the stairs whereas nakusha sat in a corner from where she could still see the big idol of lord Shiv ji and a small one of lord Ganesha. It had been a very long time since nakusha had visited any temple, she blamed lack of time as the reason behind however deep down the real reason was quite different. She believed that people with a pure mind BODY and soul deserved to visit such pious places and she was clearly not one of them. She was impure, dirty and not worthy enough to stand before Him. She remembered her childhood when she used to make idol of bappa out of clay, decorate and worship it during ganesh chaturthi. The long and endless talks she used to have with Him, treating Him as her closest pal. Could she do all that again? Her eyes moistened as she questioned herself and turned away her gaze from Him to one of the devotee who touched his ears then rubbed his nose before Him to seek forgiveness. She wondered glancing at Him once again, if she too did the same, Would he forgive the dark sins she'd committed in those dark nights? By folding hands and shedding tears of remorse, could she come out clean before Him? She shook her head in negation, she'd been tarnished beyond repair. A part of her wanted and did blame Him for all the mess that was there in her life, after all nothing in this world happens without His consent and she didn't remember what grave mistake she'd committed to deserve a life like this.
The cheering of the huge crowd broke the terrain of her thoughts, by then the news that their dutta bhau and vaheni sahib would soon be parents had slowly spread around, it amazed her to see how everybody was showering respect and love on supriya who was giving away sweets to them. Supriya saw a toddler asking for more sweets, she smiled and caressed his face while giving him more and hoped that she too got a cute child like him, then she'd love and pamper him to no extent.
"taayi..yeh log apki kitni izzat aur apko kitna pyar karte hain." She heard nakusha say softly. Turning her neck and with pride in her eyes she replied to nakusha," taaqat aur paisa bahut zaroori hote hain nakusha..yeh insaan se kuch bhi karva sakta hai." She believed that these people who had lowered their heads in front of her, respected and loved her for the power she carried. Nakusha wished to disagree, she felt that the warmth and love in their eyes were not out of fear, these people seriously respected her a lot. She opened her mouth to speak her mind however stopped on hearing a jeep coming to a screeching halt.
Dutta had finally arrived after finishing off his meeting. The crowd greeted and made way for him. He slowly began climbing up the stairs. An overjoyed supriya met him half way. With furrowed brows he asked her," kya hua hospital mein?" she smiled through her tears and attempted dispel all his doubts. Digging her face in his chest, she embraced him and replied," jald hi koi apko baba aur mujhe aayi kehne aane wala hai." His heart skipped a beat and for a moment his senses went numb on hearing her. His brows ironed out and his eyes softened, he raised his arms to hug her back but just then his gaze fell on nakusha. Their eyes met and held for a few seconds till she gave out a soft smile. That's when he realized how and under what circumstances he was going to become a father. Instead of his wife some other woman was bearing his child, his hands dropped automatically and his hard frame stiffened. Supriya after straightening herself held his hand and said," dutta ji ..maine ek choti si puja rakhi hai humare liye." Dutta wasn't a very religious person, he believed in himself more than on any external force however at the same time he didn't show any disrespect towards Him. He bowed his head before Him when it was expected of him, otherwise he wished to write his destiny on his own.
The puja got over, pundit ji gave both of them Prasad and blessed them for their journey into parenthood. Dutta was quite surprised that the priest knew that they were going to be parents. His face wrinkled when he asked supriya," yeh baat sabko bataane ki kya zarurat thi?"
" ab nau mahine baad jab meri godh mein baccha hoga ..toh kya kehte sab se?" she replied calmly. As per her she'd done the right thing, after all people of PV should have been aware of this important news. Nobody would question them later on.
" toh kya tumne sabko sach bataya hai ki yeh baccha kiska hai?" he asked looking straight into her eyes, his tone was challenging. It annoyed him that she'd spread this news so soon. She should've controlled her emotions and not gone overboard.
" sach kya hai dutta ji? Sach yeh hai ki hone wala mujhe baccha mujhe aayi bulayega." She replied pointing the index finger to herself. She'd not lied, she'd only twisted the truth.
" sabko bataane ke liye tumhein yahi jagah mili thi?" standing in a temple it amazed him to see how shamelessly she'd lied to everybody around. She rolled her eyes and answered," dutta ji apko kya ho gaya hai? Aaj itna khushi ka din hai aur aap aisi baatein kar rahein hain?" he shook her head in disappointment, there was no point in arguing with her, she'd never accept her mistake.
An old woman came up to them and congratulated, dutta not wanting to be part of this lie left from there. Nakusha saw the woman blessing supriya, she resembled her late mother a lot. Nakusha smiled slowly watching her and thought, had her mother been alive today, she would've also caressed her face like that. Tears welled up in her eyes, been so close to her mother she wished she was alive today to see her daughter stepping into motherhood. She touched her stomach lightly, the smile that was there a few seconds ago disappeared instantly. No, her mother would have died out of shame after knowing that her daughter was an unwed mother, that she'd sold away her womb for some money. Nakusha shut her eyes in pain, she'd failed as a daughter. Her mother would've hated her had she been around. Tears threatening to roll down from her closed eyes she hoped or rather wondered that wouldn't her mother understand the circumstances under which she'd done all this?
" Prasad" she heard a husky voice. Opening her eyes she saw dutta standing next to her, she immediately dropped her gaze and pushed back her tears. He'd seen her sad and gloomy expressions, was she regretting her acts? She extended her hand and opened her palm for the Prasad, his fingers touched her softly while giving it to her and it surprised her that he came all the way down personally to offer the Prasad. His eyes didn't leave her face, trying to gauge what was going in her mind.
" ghar chalein?" they both turned towards the owner of the voice who was supriya. Dutta nodded her head silently and stepped down while nakusha and supriya followed him behind.
The pure and soothing moon light made its way through open windows. It was past midnight as nakusha stirred in her sleep. The whirlpool of emotions and feelings that she'd gone through the day had taken a toll on her senses forcing her to retire to bed early. She woke up to a dry throat and looked around for water. The maid had probably forgotten to keep the water flask in her room. She went down to the kitchen to have water and was coming out after having it when she saw some light coming from the end of the hall. On her own accord her feet began to move towards the light. She caught sight of him, he was sitting on the bar stool twirling the glass of whiskey in his hand. His ice cold gaze froze on her, both looked into one another's eyes and searched for the hidden emotions. A day that had marked a huge change in their lives had failed to mark a change in his eyes. They were still grim and lonely.
" sahab ..aap aaj khush nahin ho?" her direct and blatant statements always hit him right through. Somewhere it amazed him and somewhere it annoyed him to see how effortlessly she deciphered his thoughts. He directed his lips towards the glass and gulped its contents down his throat.
" aap baba banne wale ho ..toh khush toh hona chaiye nah?"
" aayi toh tu bhi banne wali hai..kya tu khush hai?" pat came his reply or question taking her completely off guard. Although he spoke less but whenever he did, he either crushed or touched something inside her. lowering her head she turned around and without replying slowly walked back to her room. Since evening he had observed a change in her behavior, instead of celebrating this big news with supriya she had gone all silent. She and supriya were the only ones who had benefitted from this deal then why wasn't she happy about it? Why was she on the verge of tears in the temple? Not one of those who hold their thoughts back then why was she avoiding his gaze? What was bothering her so much? Not getting an answer to any of his questions, he too began climbing up the stairs to his room.
Nakusha opened her cupboard and searched for her priceless possession, her age old radio that her mother had bought for her. tonight she was missing her a lot. She took it out and began tuning it, then stopped as it caught a channel where a beautiful ghazal was being aired.
Apni marzi se
Kahan apne safar ke hum hain
Rukh hawaaon ka jidhar ka hai
Udhar ke hum hain.
She stared blankly at the lines on her open palms, things were and would never be under her control. She was a puppet in HIS hands. Circumstances and situations ruled her life and she simply flowed with them.
Chalte rehte hain ki
Chalna hai musafir ka naseeb
Sochte rehte hain ki
Kis raah guzar ke hum hain.
She gazed up at the stars out of her window and thought about the various roles she'd played till date. From a daughter she became a wife then a prostitute and now a mother but in all these phases of her life where was the real nakusha? She was nowhere to be seen. Today she was here to give this couple a child but after nine months where would she be, she had no clue. What future held for, she didn't know. She was simply walking and embracing whatever was coming her way with the hope that it might lead her to happiness.
Pehle har cheez this apni
magar ab lagta hai
apne hi ghar mein
kisi dusre ghar ke hum hain
after that dark night, it was for the first time that dutta was stepping into his room at this hour. He looked around and tried to register everything through his drowsy eyes. Finally his gaze fell on that bed where his wife was contently sleeping, the same bed which he'd shared with her for so long. He moved towards it and stared at it. Instead of the time spent with his wife, the night shared with another woman flashed before him. He flinched and cringed on remembering those moments, nope he couldn't sleep on that bed again. The thing that belonged to them , the room that was theirs had now been invaded by someone else making him feel like a stranger.
Rukh hawaaon ka jidhar ka hai
Udhar ke hum hain
He flopped down on the couch and closed his eyes, hoping that those memories would fade with time, hoping that he'd accept what life was offering him like always.
Thanks for reading
next part http://www.india-forums.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=3234274&PID=70275517�
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