Joined: 06 June 2009
"I sought my soul, but my soul I could not see. I sought my God, but my God eluded me. I sought my brother and I found all three. "
After tormenting 4 hours of struggle, I sat up in my bed. Sleep had just refused to enter my mind after seeing the destruction that the hurricane of guilt and pain was doing there. Mansi was sleeping soundly next to me. It had been a long day for her as well. I turned around and saw the time it was 3:30 am already. My lips and eyes smiled seeing Sahil and my picture on the bedside table. I picked the picture hugged it and laid down again. All the events of the day right from Sahil's accident to me slapping him played in front of my eyes as if I was watching some motion picture. I stared at Sahil's photo; letting my eyes, mind, heart and soul drink-in his smiling, charming face. I hugged the frame tightly and closed my eyes. This time in my mind's video player some other old cherished memory played.
Standard 6th - Swami Vivekananda Primary school sports day event 1996 3:00 PM:
Eight boys were getting ready warming up for the boys 100 meters race competition. All the parents and the fellow students were cheering for the boys. Maa and I were seated in the front row, both of us excited and geared up to see Sahil win in this race. Sahil had been an athlete, participating in all inter-school running competition and winning the trope for our school. My excitement to see Sahil win had swallowed all my body's tiredness because of the sport activities that happened early today morning at the secondary section sports day; and in the afternoon it was the primary section sports day event. Maa was all excited to see his charming young Sahil in the ground warming up for his win.
I could very clearly vision a small 6 years old Sahil with his extra-large shorts participate in his first race ever and surprising everyone with his victory. I laughed reminiscing the surprised face of his strict teacher Miss Vinaya. She had always complained that the students in her class were more attentive to my talkative brother's stories than her. Miss Vinaya would always question on the fact that how could this chatting machine be my brother.
The voice of the Commenter brought me back to reality. On your marks -get set -go. And there he was leading right from the beginning. I was screaming my lungs out, though was sure enough Sahil couldn't hear me. His win was no surprise to me, but what followed shocked me. After the finish line, Sahil was fighting with a boy, pulling his hairs and swearing at him . All teachers rushed to both the boys to separate them. Soon Me and Maa reached there, and I rushed to Sahil and held him tight in my arms. Sahil was still showing his kung-Fu moves in the air. I tightened my grip around his chest.
He was still screaming and shouting "Mere bhai ke bare mein kuch aur bola na tho jaan le lounga teri, who mera sautela bhai nahi hai, meri mummy use bhi utna hi pyaar karti hai jitna mujhe".Soon the other boy barked "Acha tho teri mummy sirf tere sports day par kyu ati hai, tere bhai ke sports day par kyu nahi, teri mummy sirf tujhse pyaar karti hai, tere bhai se nahi". Maa and me, we both were shocked beyond words at that moment. Maa just dragged us to the school parking lot towards our car. Sahil was still fuming in anger, all ready to go back and beat the boy black and blue. Maa turned to say something but was cut by Sahil "No Mom, agar apke paas Anoop bhaiya ke Sports day mein ane ka time nahi hai, tho mere sports day par bhi ane ki koi zarrorat nahi,itni meherbani mat karo,aur''..". Sahil was shocked at first but then was quite the whole journey back to our home. I kept on staring at my palm, not believe that I had actually slapped Sahil, Maa was too broken down by Sahil's words to say anything. The whole night I couldn't sleep.
Next day morning, Sahil as usual came running to my room just before going downstairs for our breakfast before leaving to school . I blankly stared at him. Sahil with a childish scorn said, "Without your mirror how will you get ready". I remembered how few days ago I was reading a proverb -The best mirror is an old friend. And how his little Sahil had said that he was his best and oldest friend as they were friends right from the time he was born and taken the word mirror literally; and from then on he had made his bhaiya get ready in front of him and not look into the mirror.
I closed my eyes and a lone tear made its way from the curtains of my eyes. Before it could flow down all the way to my chin, I felt a warm hand wipe it off. Without opening my eyes I held out to that soft tender hand. I slowly whispered "sorry". "Ah... who word mat bolo, Brothership mein no sorry no thankyou, aab apne bol diya tho mein aab bhuk hartal par hu, nasta nahi karunga". I opened my eyes and gave him a confused look to which Sahil replied "agar do best friends brother ho tho who brothership hota hai". I smiled through my tears, and said "Age se naho bolunga, promise". That was enough to bring back the smile in his little nautanki ki dukaan.
End of flashback:
The gleaming rays of sun made its way into the room touching his face. He slowly opened his eyes, and saw Mansi was not there. He quickly freshened up and mad his way to the dining room. Sahil was still nowhere around. Probably he was still angry for the slap that he gifted him for supporting him. He was about to get up when Sahil made his way to the table. He sat beside me and gave me his most cherished and bright smile. I passed him a faint smile and some sandwiches which he took delightfully and giggled. On my asking him the reason for his chuckle he replied "mujhe laga aap apni brothership wali promise bhul jaoge aur aaj mujhe bhuk hartal karna padega". Hearing this I whispered in his ears "Nahi Nahi mein apne personal freedom fighter par aise atyachaar nahi kar sakta".We both stared at each other and laughed our hearts out making the whole family wonder what the matter was, but then the whole family got busy in their breakfast as all knew, asking the brothers would be no use, they never shared their code words and secrets.
Hey everyone , I'm writing after a gap of 6 years, I just hope I have not wasted ur precious time, and Sarah on ur insistence I'm writing it, hope u like it
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