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Joined: 06 March 2012
Priya entered the room, only to find Ram standing before the bookshelf, his back at her, talking to someone on phone.
Ram - Arey yaar, she is a beauty man! She is a classic beauty!
Priya stopped abruptly at the door.
Ram – Kaise bataun tujhe yaar Vikram, jabse uspar nazar padi hai na… paagal ho raha hoon main. I just can't stop thinking about her yaar!
Priya's ears pricked at these lines. 'Whom is he talking about?'
Ram – Aaj office mein bhi sab usi ke bare mein baat kar rahe they. Everyone's going crazy about her yaar. Tu dekhna, 2 din mein wo meri hogi. You just wait and watch.
Priya couldn't believe her ears. Ram… her husband… her Ram.. talking about someone like this??
Ram – What do you mean league mein nahi hai? Tu paagal toh nahi ho gaya? Tu mujhe, The Ram Kapoor ko bol raha hai ki she might be difficult to get? Jaanta nahi hai kya mujhe? Jo main ek baar decide kar leta hoon, use haasil kar ke rehta hoon. Aur maine kar liya hai decide. She's gonna be mine within 2 days. You just wait and watch!
Priya's ears were flaming. She was rooted to the spot. Her mind was refusing to believe what she heard just now. It was as if someone had clubbed her on the head. She silently went towards the bathroom, making sure that Ram doesn't hear her.
Ram (continuing on phone) – Abay chup! Cheez mat bol use. Car hai toh kya hua? She is a beauty, I am telling you. And waise bhi, You know better to call Lexus anything but cheez in front of me, you rascal!... haan haan.. hoon main paagal. Chal ab hansna band kar. I need to go. Bye! Goodnight.
He ended the call and walked towards the bathroom.
Ram (murmuring to himself) – Ye aaj Priya abhi tak room mein kyun nahi aayi? Bas, dadi ke paas baithi hogi. Ye dadi bhi na, itni umar ho gayi hai unki… but kabhi kabhi na, ekdum bachchon jaisi harqat karti hain. Unhein samjhna chaahiye ki bahu ko pote ke paas aane dein..wo intezaar kar raha hoga apni biwi ka.. par nahi, unhein apni jawani ki kahaniyaan sunaane se fursat mile.. tab na.
He walked upto the bathroom and found it bolted from inside.
Ram – Priya? Priya… tum andar ho?
A sniffle followed by "haan… main hoon" came out.
Ram – Ise kya hua?
He stood waiting at the door. Within 5 minutes, Priya came out, dressed in her night robe. She brushed passed him without even looking at him. She went to her side of the bed, lied down, pulled the duvet and put her right hand over her eyes.
Ram was taken aback by her speed. He went near her.
Ram – Priya, are you ok? Kya hua tumhein? Ekdum se…
Priya – I am ok. I want to sleep early, kal classes jaldi hain. Goodnight.
He was taken aback by her crisp reply.
Ram – Tumhari awaaz ko kya hua? Tum… ek minute… tum ro rahi ho? Are you crying Priya? (Sitting beside her) Kya hua?
Priya – No. I' am just having a blocked nose. Goodnight.
Ram (trying to remove her hand from her eyes) – Goodnight baba but hua kya? Ekdum se? Doctor ko phone karoon?
Priya – Please, let me sleep Ram. I really need to get up early.
Ram took his hand back and sat there, looking at her and wondering what wrong did he do to get such a moody wife. 'Abhi dinner ke time toh sahi thi yaar. Ekdum se kya ho gay?'
He sat there for some more time, making up his mind to try once more or let it be. He decided to let her be, thinking he'll talk to her next morning, 'jab madam ka mood theek hoga.'
Ram got up from the bed and went to the bathroom.
Priya, sensing that he has left, removed her hand from her eyes and looked towards the bathroom door.
'Kya karoon main? Jo kuchh abhi suna.. I can't believe it. Ram will never break my trust. I know him too well. He can never do such a thing. But… jo suna, uska kya karoon?
'She is a classic beauty!'
'She's gonna be mine within 2 days.'
These words were ringing in her mind continuously.
Ram came and lied on his side of the bed and started snoring within 5 minutes. Priya was unable to close her eyes even for a second. She tossed and turned the entire night, going mad thinking. She finally slept in the wee hours of the morning.
In the morning, Ram woke up to find her sleeping.
Ram – Achchha, toh madam ko aaj jaldi jana hai but abhi tak so rahi hai. 7 baj gaye hain. Shall I wake her up?
He looked at her gorgeous face and couldn't bring himself to wake her up. He sat there silently admiring his beautiful wife. He then got up and went get ready for office, leaving her asleep. He came out to find her still sleeping. He went to her, placed a soft kiss on her cheek and left for office.
Priya woke up after 15 minutes, only to find him gone from the room.
Priya – Aaj Ram mujhe bina bataaye office chale gaye? Matlab kuchh toh hai….
'No Priya, don't think like this. Aisa kuchh nahi hai. Tujhe apne husband par poora bharosa hai. Wo kabhi aisa nahi kar sakte…'
'Par kal wo phone par.. aur aaj mujhe bina goodbye kiss diye chale gaye… bina bataaye.. iska matlab..'
'Arey iska matlab kuchh nahi yaar…'
'Ek kaam karti hoon, Neha ko phone karti hoon. Use 11 saalon ka experience hai. Wo zaroor is maamle mein meri help karegi.'
'Nahi yaar… Tu Neha ko kya bataayegi? You trust Ram, don't you? Toh Neha se ye sab keh kart u apna trust lose kare degi… aur kuchh nahi…'
'Toh kya karoon main..kuchh samajh nahi aa raha…'
'Ek kaam kar.. Vikram se mil. Ram kal us se hi baat kar rahe they. Wo zaroor jaanta hai is bare mein..'
'Haan, yahi theek rahega. Main Vikram se pooch kar sab clear kar lungi.'
Priya decided to go to Kapoor Industries' office during her lunch hour.
She got up, got ready and went to her classes.
But the whole time, Ram's conversation was playing on her mind. She just couldn't concentrate on her lectures. She somehow managed to keep her cool till the lunch hour and ran out the moment she heard the bell.
She reached the office and went straight to Vikram's cabin. She was just about to enter when Jenny saw her.
Jenny – Good after noon ma'am. It's so good to see you here.
Priya (flustered) – Oh Hi Jenny. Same here. How are you?
Jenny – I am absolutely fine ma'am. Are you looking for Vikram sir?
Priya – Umm.. well.. yeah.. wanted his opinion regarding something. (She was fervently praying to God to make Jenny leave soon or else ram might find her) Nothing official though! (She added, hoping that Jenny won't run to Ram, announcing her presence there.)
Jenny – Oh. But Vikram sir is attending an urgent meeting, ma'am. He'll be free only in an hour. Shall I intimate him of your presence?
Priya (thinking) – One Hour!! I don't have that much time. Aur agar Ram ne yahan dekh liya toh hazaar sawaal karenge. (Loudly) No.. no.. it's ok. I think I'll leave and talk to him on phone. Thanks Jenny. Have a good day!
And she turned away in a rush. But just as luck would have it, she bumped into who else but Ram.
Ram – Priya! Tum yahan?
Priya (cursing her luck) – Ummm… haan… wo… main.. main…
Jenny – Sir, wo.. ma'am Vikram sir se milne aayi thi But he is busy so…
Ram – Vikram se? Wo bhi office mein? Kyun?
Priya – Wo.. main.. mujhe…
Just then her phone rang. Thanking her stars, she took out her phone.
Priya – I have to rush Ram. Something urgent has come up. Bye!
And before either Ram or Jenny could make out something of her visit, she rushed out. They both saw her retreating back and then looked at each other.
Ram gave Jenny an embarrassed smile, reading her confused expression.
Ram(laughs a bit, trying to say something appropriate to her) – Nahi.. She is ok. Just in a… bit of hurry… she is working too hard these days. Need to take her for a vacation soon.. hahaha
They both smiled at each other and left.
Priya entered KM around 8 in the evening. Her day had been really bad, with Ram's conversation playing all over her mind, in a loop, throughout the day. She was exhausted by the constant thinking and her head was pounding like anything. She reached the room, only to find Ram missing. Her temper hit the roof.
Priya – Bansi Kaka!! Bansi Kaka!
Poor Bansi kaka (Priya hamesha apna gussa bechare Bansi par hi nikalti hai) was at the door in a jiffy.
Priya - Sahab kahan hain?
BK – Ma'am, sahab toh ab taka aye nahi office se. Haan, unhone phone kiya tha ki wo aaj kaafi der se ghar aayenge. Wo Pune gaye hain kaam ke silsile mein.
Priya – Pune? Ekdum se? And he didn't even tell me. Kahin… (Loudly) Theek hai, Aap jaiye aur mere liye ek adrak wali chai le aiye.
'Kya karoon? Kuchh bhi samajh nahi aa raha hai. Oh god! Ye ho kya raha hai meri life mein. Abhi kal tak toh achchhi bhali thi. Ab achaanak se ye sab kya ho raha hai? Ye Ram aisa kaise kar sakte hain? Kisse poochhoon?'
She had her dinner and was lying on the bed, pondering over the problem at hand. Just then she heard Ram coming. He was flanked by Bansi kaka and was talking to him.
Ram – Priya so gayi? Khana khaya usne?
BK – Ji sir. Ma'am ne kha liya. Aapke liye laaoon?
Ram – Nahi. Mujhe bhook nahi hai. Maine kar liya hai dinner. Aap jaiye.
Saying this, Ram entered the room. Priya quickly put her hand over her eyes and pretended to sleep. His eyes fell on his sleeping beauty.
He smiled at her thinking, "ye Priya bhi na… aajkal pata nahi kis duniya mein hai. Itna kaam karti hai, itna thak jaati hai… but worry not Darling, aapke liye aapke husband ne kuchh special plan kiya hai."
Just then, his phone rings.
Ram (in a low voice) – Haan vikram bol….haan main pahunch gaya. Just now. Haan, Priya so rahi hai.
This made Priya prick her ears.
Ram – Haan yaar, I know. Even I can't wait. Bas aaj raat ki baat hai. Kal she'll be mine. Oh god! I just can't believe it! Dekha, Ram Kapoor jo kehta hai, wo karta hai. Tune challenge kiya tha na mujhe? Ab bol! Haan haan… kal office hi jaoonga. Wahin milegi. Arey wo kal Sunday hai na, toh Priya ghar pe hi hogi, isliye maine office ke liye hi bol diya.
Priya was unable to believe her ears. 'So this is what Ram is upto?!' She was fuming with anger. 'Maine kitna bharosa kiya in par aur ye…. Neha is right. Sab mard ek jaise hote hain. Kabhi inka bharosa nahi karna chaahiye.'
Thinking all this, a tear escaped her eyes.
Ram then went to the bathroom, continuing on phone.
Ram – Haan haan. Maine poori planning kar li hai. Kal delivery lete hi Priya ko kisi bahaane se office bula lunga aur phir hum humari nayi Lexus mein Pune jaayenge. Waise thanks yaar, aaj tune office sambhaal liya aur main Pune ja kar sab taiyyari kar paya. I tell you, in wives ko surprise karna kitna mushkil hai. Kya kya karna padta hai…. Haan sahi keh raha hai. Waise Priya is much better than Neha, no offence haan! Chal theek hai… goodnight!
Meanwhile, Priya was busy getting worked up, thinking all the nonsense. Ram came back and went to sleep. She again had a terrible night, second in a row.
Priya was sitting on the bed in her night dress, just woken up by all the noise Ram was making while getting dressed.
She was eyeing him narrowly, trying hard to suppress her anger.
Ram came out of the dressing room with a bright orange tie in his hand. He went to the dressing table, whistling to himself.
Ram – Good morning darling! Slept well?
She forced a smile on her face.
Priya – Kyun ye tie?
Ram (taken aback) – huh? What?
Priya gave him a pointed look. (Guyz, just remember that breakfast scene on the morning of Lohri, when Ram is eating Paranthas and Priya is looking at him, all daggers. I just can't describe that look that Sakshi had. Too good she was!)
Ram – Ummm… guess you are right. Too bright na? I think I'll give tie a toss and leave my top button open. What say?
Priya's eyes just flared up listening this. 'Top button open! Kahan toh bina tie ke ghar se nikalte nahi aur aaj top button open!'
She got up from the bed and went to stand behind him. Ram smiles at her through the mirror, busy slapping up cologne.
Priya – Kya baat hai, aaj bade khush lag rahe hain?
Ram – Haan. Aaj main bahut khush hoon.
Priya – Wo toh dikh hi raha hai. Itni jaldi taiyyar ho gaye… orange tie.. then top button open, lavish spray of cologne. Must say, kuchh khaas hoga na aaj?
Ram – Haan… bahut khaas din hai aaj.
Priya – Kya khaas? jaan sakti hoon?
Ram – Nahi.
Priya – Excuse me?
Ram – I said No. (looking at Priya's shocked face, he hastily added) I mean, it's gonna be a surprise for you.
Priya – It's alright. Main jaanti hoon surprise ke bare mein.
Ram turned towards her with lightening speed.
Ram – Kya?
Priya (sighing, her face felling) – Maine kaha main jaanti hoon aapke surprise ke bare mein.
Ram – Damn! Magar kaise? Tumhein kaise pata chala? Kitni mehnat ki thi isko raaz rakhne ki but… kaise pata tumhein? I know! Vikram! Vikram ne khola na apna muh?
Priya looked at him with pain in her eyes.
Ram - I so knew it! Uske pet mein kabhi koi baat nahi rehti. Sab Neha ki sangat ka asar hai! Kitna bola tha chup reh.. chup reh.. lekin nahi! Pata nahi kya dushmani nikaal raha hai! Us din jab tum office aayi thi.. hold on! Us din jab tum office aayi thi Vikram se milne… tabhi usne bataya na? Vikram… tu toh Gaya kaam se! You are dead, man!
Priya (her eyes brimming with tears) – Bas kijiye Ram. Vikram ne mujhe kuchh nahi kaha. (sobbing) Aur aap jo ye sab uske bare mein bol rahe hain na, Neha ki sangat ka asar and all that… Neha ki wajah se hi wo control mein hai warna aapki tarah pata nahi wo bhi ye sab… (and she breaks down completely)
Ram (panicking) – Arey … tum kyun ro rahi ho?
He went to her and placed his hand on her shoulder, to comfort her.
Priya (shrugging off his hand) – Please Ram. Don't touch me! Main kabhi soch bhi nahi sakti thi ki aap aisa karenge.
Ram – Hain? Aisa karenge matlab? Aisa kya kar diya maine?
Priya (her eyes throwing daggers) – Sharam nahi aati aapko? Mujhse pooch rahe hain? How could you Ram? Aapne ek baar bhi mere bare mein nahi socha? Ye nahi socha ki mujhe jab ye sab pata lagega toh mujhe kaisa feel hoga?
Ram – I know… I know. Main jaanta hoon ki tum is maamle mein thodi sensitive ho. But yaar, limited edition hai… ye mauka kaise jaane deta? Aur phir class hai toh price bhi zyada hoga hi na? But yaar, sirf is baar adjust kar lo na. Agli baar tumse poochhe bina kabhi book nahi karoonga. Happy?
Priya – I don't believe you just said that? Agli baar? Mujhse pooch kar? Book? Disgusting Ram! You are pathetic!
Ram – Arey? Ab maine kya kar diya? Keh toh raha hoon agli baar tumse poochhe bina nahi karoonga. Hadd hai matlab! Tumse pooch ke karo toh problem, na poochho toh problem. Chaahti kya ho tum?
Priya – Main kuchh nahi chaahti Ram. Main bas apne ghar jana chaahti hoon. Mujhe nahi rehna aapke sath!
And she turned to go.
Ram – Oye! Ye kya? Ghar chhod ke? Priya, kya keh rahi ho tum? (He grabs her hand)
Priya – Please Ram. Mujhe jaane dijiye.
Ram – Arey paagal ho kya? Itni si baat pe ghar chhod ke?
Priya (almost screaming) – Itni si baat? Ye itni si baat hai? Aap kisi aur ladki ke sath… aur mujhse keh rahe hian agli baar pooch ke book karoonga.. chhee!!
Ram (his jaw dropping) – Ladki? Kaunsi ladki?
Priya – Please Ram. Ab ye 45 saal ke bachche ki tarah maasoom shakal mat banaiye.
Ram – O hello! Tum pagal ho gayi ho kya? Kya bol rahi ho? Raat ko vodka pi ke soyi thi kya? Dimag hil gaya hai kya tumhara?
Priya – Soyi thi? Ram, main pichhle do raaton se ek pal ke liye bhi nahi soyi hoon. Par aapko kya… aap jaiye.. jiske sath time spend karna hai kijiye…
Ram – Oh god! Tum na paagal kar ke chhodogi mujhe! Koi ladki wadki nahi hai yaar! Main toh tumhein surprise karna chaahta tha… maine tumhaare liye Lexus khareedi hai.
Priya – Bas Ram. Bahaane mat banaiye. Maine khud aapko Vikram se phone pe baat karte suna hai.
Ram – Kya?
Priya (mimicking Ram's deep sigh) – She is a classic beauty yaar Vikram. She'll be mine in two days… blah blah blah…
Ram looked at her in amusement and then burst out into laughter.
Ram – Oh god! Priya! You. Are. The . limit! Hahahahha… kya yaar!
Priya (temper rising up watch him laugh) – Ismein itna funny kya hai Ram?
Ram (controlling his laughter) – Priya, tum bhi na…. Arey baba, sach mein.. I was talking about Lexus. Main use classic beauty keh raha tha. Tumhein yakeen nahi hota na? Ye dekho, mere phone mein ye pic. Latest model launch hua hai. Limited edition. Main uske bare mein baat kar traha tha. Infact office mein sab usi ke bare mein baat kar rahe they. Maine isiliye jaldi se booking bhi karwa di.
Priya (trying to make sense of all this) aap sach keh rahe hain? Pakka car ke bare mein baat kar rahe they?
Ram (his eyes going all soft) – Haan baba. Tumhaari qasam! Main Lexus ke bare mein baat kar raha tha. I swear.
Priya (anger returning) – Hadd hoti hai Ram! Car ke bare mein koi aise kaise baat kar sakta hai? Pata hai aapko, aapki phone convo sun kar kya kya beeti hai mujhpar? Kya kya soch baithi thi main!! Koi car ko She is a classic beauty keh ke describe karta hai?
Ram – O hello! Wo sirf car nahi hai… wo classic model hai. Toh use waise hi describe karoonga na..
Priya - Oh god! Koi kisi cheez ko itni passionately kaise describe kar sakta hai??!!
Ram – Are you mad? Tum use cheez keh rahi ho? Oh hello! Cheez nahi hai wo. Wo Lexus hai! Izzat se baat karo! Uski bhi feelings hain. Pleae, get that in your mind!
Priya rolled her eyes at her husband's dramatics. She walked by him and went and sat at the dressing table. Ram followed her.
Priya – Uff Ram! Aap bhi kitna drama karte hain! Pata hai aapki is bachkaani harqat ki wajah se kitni problem hui mujhe? Kya kya nahi guzri mujhpar? Zara bhi andaaza hai aapko?
Ram (sheepishly) - haan to wo tumhaari problem hai. Agar tum apne husband par itna bhi bharosa nahi kar sakti toh wo meri problem nahi hai?
Priya – I don't believe this! Aap ab sara blame mujh par daal rahe hain?
Ram (going to her and locking her into his arms, by her waist) – I am sorry yaar. I really am. But batao, ismein meri bhi kya galti hai. Main toh tumse isliye chhupa raha tha kyunki main tumhein surprise karna chaah raha tha.
Priya (still not melting) – yeah right! I was more shocked than surprised!
Ram – I am sorry baba! Galti ho gayi. Aage se aisa kuchh nahi karoonga.
Priya (trying to act pricey) – sorry kehne se kya hoga? Mujhe kitna pareshan kiya aapne.. kya kya soch rahi…
Just then Ram bent forward and shut her up his style.
They came back to their senses after a few moments.
Ram – Chalo, ab jab aapne mere surprise ka satyanash kar hi diya hai, toh ab aap ja kar taiyaar hongi?
Priya – kisliye?
Ram – Hum kuchh dino ke liye Pune ja rahe hain.
Priya – Pune? Kyun?
Ram – Kyunki meri wife kaam kar kar ke exhaust ho chuki hai aur main use rejuvenate karwane ke liye use yahan se door le jana chaahta hoon. Moreover, kaafi time se humne sath mein waqt nahi bitaya toh agle 7 din tak hum sath rahenge.
Priya smiled at him.
Ram – Aur waise aaj ke is incident ke baad mujhe lagta hai ki mera ye faisla bilkul theek hai. Agar kuchh aur din aisa hi chalta toh tum definitely humara divorce karwa chuki hoti.
Priya hit at him on the chest and they both hugged each other.
And the Classic beauty, I mean, the car (ooops) THE Lexus had to wait a lil longer for her master.
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