Joined: 14 April 2011
He felt suffocated with anger. He walked into the hostel corridor for a while but nothing could calm him down. He barged inside his hostel room. His chest heaving up and down trying hard to calm himself. A fit of rage absolute rage made him shiver as he recalled her words, "I hate you'."
He kicked the chair in anger and madly searched, Books fell on the floor, clothes scattered haywire. Finally grabbing a hold of what he had treasured 'THOSE TRAIN TICKETS- which he had exchanged for his ring .Throwing them on the floor, he threw his lighter .His rage increased with the flames that caught up with the books and clothes too-THE BLACK SMOKE FILLED HIS ROOM. He was delighted by the blaze as he ruthlessly looked at those burned tickets savage satisfaction. A turbulent hurricane swept across his heart. The last hope that he had was uprooted right in front of him. He had been hoping to make up to Gulaal win her, for what he did not know, but her words were like poison to his ears.
The flame grew wilder and tears rolled down Kesar's cheeks. Against the thick dark flames, Kesar appeared as a shadow as Negi jumped on him horrified
"Kesar kesar tu kya kar raha hai'Pagal ho gaya hai kya.",Negi splashed a huge bucket of water and doused the fire.
Kesar slopped on the ground and suddenly burst into tears. So intense was his cries that Negi looked at him horrified and ran towards him hugging him. Kesar broke into a wild lament. "Main kya Karun Negi'.Sale humesha ka yehi rona hai'Kuch bhi cheez mang k nahi milti..",A swift shudder passed through his body and he felt terribly and awfully alone.The angst that had filled his heart finally found its way."Bachpan se lekar aaj tak..kuch mila hi nahi'Sab kuch chinna pada..Pencil tak ko tarsta tha'.Par majaal hai ki Bhagwaan ko taras aa gaya ho'.Everytime I just had to struggle aur Gulaal wo ek cheez jo mujhe chahiye thi'.Use bhi bhagwaan ne kaha Kesar tu gadha hai'.She is not yours'But you know what ..maine bahut koshish ki'Mera dimag kaam karna band ho gaya hai'.I want her ..I want her at any cost'.Negi'Wo 24 ghante..haan 24 ghante yahan",He looked at Negi with hopeless despair and patted his head in desperation, "'.Yahan mere dimag mein ghumti hi rehti hai'..Aise to main ji hi nahi paunga'.",Kesar wept loudly.Negi knew that these were tears that could not be stopped .He knew his wounds were much deeper than his yearning for Gulaal.He knew Kesar had been hurt by everyone, his own father, his village people, society and above all Gulaal . He knew what Kesar was today was due to bitterness of betrayal and deprivation. Every second of his life had been a struggle.
FLASHBACK Years ago
The stones hurled at Kesar and his mother. The whole village had gathered to burn his mother and Kesar.Shivraj watched the mob cry and hurl abuses in frenzy from behind a tree, "maro in paiyonko..Is gandagi ko saaf karo'"
Negi shivered to see the young boy Kesar just about his age standing alone in front of his Ija(mother) facing the wrath fearlessly'
"Ruko'",The voice of Sunderlal Negi ..the village sarpanch,Shivraj's father stopped the villagers, "Mere rehte inhe koi haath nahi laga sakta'Meri muhboli behan hai'ye'.Khabardaar'."
"Aap hat jayiye ..sarpanch ji. Is paap ko khatm hi kar denge aaj'.",The crowd roared in anger.
"ZINDA REHNA AUR IS GAON MEIN REHAN MERA HAQ HAI''",The trembling voice of Kesar stunned everyone. Those tiny little eyes were burning with rage as he held a huge stone in his hand and threw it at one of the village men.
"Shabaash beta'.",SunderLal patted his cheeks ,"Lekin ek baat yaad rakho'Haq kabhi mangne se nahi milta use china padta hai'."
"Kesar ..Kesar tu fikar mat kar yaar'.Tu bechain mat ho..main abhi jakar use dekhta hun'",Negi patted his cheeks.
"Nahi'",Kesar held his hand in rage
"Kesar tu akhir chahta kya hai ?",Negi looked at him confused.
"Main chahta hun wo roye use mujhse nafrat hai'Let her hate me more'.I want her to scream and beg for mercy'.I want her now'.I want her samjha'Is duniya mein koi cheez mangne se nahi milti chinni padti hai'.I will snatch her away'.Use aur uske bhai..dono ko..I will teach both of them a lesson .NEGI'.use itni asani se jane nahi dunga main'..You know what mere dil ko chain nahi milega ..ab bilkul bhi nahi..jab tak use main sabak na sikha dun'",Kesar fumed with rage.His mind swept with hurt and anger.
"Yaar'.main'Negi'.Kuch kar'.Mian shayad pagal ho jaunga'.",restlessness swamped him and he wept again.
" Shhh Kesar '.Suna hai roz subah morning walk ko jati hai ' Tu fikr mat kar mere bhai'.Utha le ayenge use..Phir sirf tu aur wo..Fikr mat kar samjha'..Main hun na'.sab theek ho jayega..",Negi rubbed his back.
"Sab theek ho jayega'?",Kesar looked at him confused.He knew Gulaal would cry,scream for help, but her words made him blind to everything else.
"Haan sab theek ho jayega. Main hun na'.",Negi assured Kesar and walked out of the room.
The whole house was still, unnaturally still. The crickets chirped and sang hymns breaking the silence of the night. She tossed and turned relentlessly in her bed .A wave uneasiness swept her mind. Sleep eluded her. Sitting up with a pillow supporting her back ,she listened to the silence that haunted her from outside and inside. For in her heart she knew exactly what she yearned for which she dare not even confess to herself. Her eyes dry ,her heart weeping, she picked up a small photo frame with Karan and hers engagement picture. She found herself years ago'Carried away to the same place where her destiny was written with Karan.
AIIMS ,New Delhi, Oncology WARD.
The ventilator beeped and those dry eyes misted with dirt and tears, he could barely speak. 18 year old Gulaal and her family stood there as Raman breathed his last breaths.
"Promise me..Sudha..Gulaal humare ghar ki bahu zarur banegi'",Raman raised his hand while Karan weeped sitting at his feet.
"Gulaal promise tu Karan ka dhyan humesha rakhegi'.Wada kar beta use sirf tu hi sambhal sakti hai'.",With those eyes hazy and a body hardly able to keep up with the infection,Raman held her hand.
"Haan Babuji'Main wada karti hun'.",Gulaal cried a lot .She only had some faint memories of her father but ever since she had met Raman ,he was more than a father to her.Sudha ,Rewa wept bitterly while Abir and Paan held on to them.Chinky clutched the hem of Gulaal's skirt and sat beside her
"Karan dekhna meri Gulaal ko koi taqleef kabhi na ho'.Promise me'.Tu sirf use khush rakhega humesha'",Rman held Gulaal's hand and placed it in Karan's hand
"Promise kar Gulaal tu Karan ko kabhi nahi chhod k jayegi wada kar'.",His choking voice cried in hope
"I promise babuji..Aaap aisi batein kyun kar rahe hain..aapko kuch nahi hoga'.Kuch nahi'..Babuji'Bauji'."Those eyes closed forever ,her hand frozen in those stone cold hands,The silence of the room was broken by wailings 'earth shattering and Gulaal's tears wouldn't stop.
"Main sirf Karan se pyaar karti hun..Main babuji ko diya hua wada nahi tod sakti hun'",Wiping away the flush of tears that had drenched her face,She mumbled a silent prayer and fell on the bed lifeless and deprived,for she knew never can Karan make her the way she felt with Kesar.
The room was a mess and dimly lit filled with the stench of alcohol and echoed with wailings of anguish. He rolled on the floor and gulped down drinks one by one .The bed sheet laid on the floor. He was in the company of darkness .He had planned on revenge but he should have felt angry and empowered but instead he was filled with guilt. He was tortured by the vivid expressions of Gulaal's smiling face. How could he hurt her. He took his pen and scratched the name of Gulaal on the floor .He did not understand what was harder---the granite floor or his quest to etch her name on it'One had to win the floor or him,----THE WAR CONTINUED like it did between his 'HEART AND MIND. The door suddenly banged open and Kesar quickly put the bed sheet on the floor
"Twinkle tu itni raat ko yahan'",His brows wrinkled with the signs of irritation.
"Mujhe tujhse kuch baat karni hai'.",Twinkle sat beside him
"Mujhe tujhse koi baat nahi karni'.",Kesar got up irritated and stood near the window.
"Kesar please main ye kehne ayi thi'..ki'.main Tujhse shaadi nahi kar sakti..main Rajveer se pyaar karti hun..par tu ye baat Dadda ko samjha na..",Twinkle blurted
"Hahahhaha Meri bala se'.Kisi se bhi kar lekin Negi rajveer ko mar dega..Isliye bhul ja use'.",Kesar said carelessly.
"Kesar hum dono ek dusre se pyaar karte hain'And I cannot forget him'Pata hai'I always thought I can capture you but I was wrong'.It was too late for me to realise that if you love something set it free'it it comes back ,it was yours'and if it doesn't it never was. Aur tu'.tu kabhi wapas nahi aya Kesar 'aur main tujhse bhi yehi kahungi'.Jiska naam tu itne man se likh raha tha..jane de use'Wo kisi aur se'."
"BULL SHIT'" ,Kesar smashed his bottle on the floor and grabbed Twinkle's shoulders, "You know kis ghatiya moral story ki book mein padhi hai tune ye sab batein haan'You know what BULL SHIT'.Gulaal is mine'.She will come'She will have to come..She is mine ..Even she cannot change it..samjhi'.Use main pakar hi rahunga samjhi'",Kesar gritted his teeth in anger.
"Aise zabardasti karke'",Twinkle frowned.
"Haan Whatever it takes. Samjhi'.She will have to come to me'.",Kesar pushed her back and turned his face around and banged his fist on the wall.
Silence ensued for minutes as Twinkle looked at Kesar shocked.
"Hm",Twinkle walked towards him and placed her hand on his shoulder. Kesar turned around and Twinkle hugged him tightly. Kesar was shocked.
"Kesar kiss me'",Twinkle held his face in her hands
"What'",Kesar's eyes popped out in horror.
"Haan kiss me..I want you. You are mine Kesar. Maine abhi tujhe dekh k realise kiya that I cannot forget you'..",Twinkle tried to forcibly Kiss him.
"WHAT THE HELL TWINKLE ",Kesar pushed her back with all his might. "Don't you understand Mere tere barein mein kuch bhi feel nahi karta'.I cannot samjhi..isliye zabardasti karna band kar'.",Kesar yelled at her.
"EXACTLY ",Twinkle folded her hands across her bosom and smiled triumphantly, "Jab tu apne saath zabardasti nahi seh sakta ..tu tune ye kaise soch liya ki Gulaal zabardasti tere paas khush rahegi'..Kesar you cannot force someone samjha'.Let her go''..Zabardasti tu sirf use hasil kar sakata hai'You cannot make her yours'So LET HER GO'.and ho sake to Dadda ko mat batan Rajveer aur mere barein mein abhi'"
Twinkle walked out leaving Kesar in utter shock.
The early morning sun opened its sleepy eyes through the morning mist from behind the hills which glistened with its golden hue'Kesar stood near his window .Tiny dust particles danced back and forth in the beams that seeped through the room. He had not shut his eyes even for a second.
"Kesar jaldi chal warana wo nikal jayegi.",.Negi walked in after taking a bath .
"Jane de",Kesar said in a low tone.
"Jane de matlab ..Raat bhar plan banaya uar tu man kar raha hai'.",Negi yelled.
"Haan",Kesar said seriously.
"Are u crazy'What about your REVENGE?,Negi was annoyed.
"I will find another way not like this'.I will deal it myself'.",Kesar blurted.
"Mtalab'",Negi looked at him confused.
"Chill yaar'Use tadpa tadapa k badla lenge aise nahi'Tu chill mar na'.",Kesar pretended to be his usual self.
Negi smiled at him ,"Tu saley'You are a born Rascal'Theek job hi tera man chahe'",Negi walked out of the room breathing a heavy sigh of relief and he was glad that Kesar was all set with his rational mind to take revenge.
Kesar 's smile dampened again as he looked at the bright morning sun and mumbled, "Thanks Twinkle".He was feeling lighter. Much lighter as only he knew that he Did not mean a single word which he said to Negi now'He was not set to take REVENGE. In fact ,He had actually Set Gulaal free'..
Breathing a huge sigh of contentment, He grabbed his towel and headed towards the washroom.
...Choory for keeping you all waiting but once again..Yes its time for daily updates YEAY :D..Missed you all muaaahAb jalsi jaldi tell me how was your Diwali and wassup? and BTW I have another surprise palnned for you allHUSH HUSH ..Abhi main chup rahungi
Am so elated reading your comments..Thank you so much everyone for such lovely comments..Guys I am really sorry for replying individually..I hope you can excuse me for that coz it becomes very difficult to type ,post and reply chappies daily..But still m trying my best to cope up..Choory guys...I read each and every comment with equal enthusiasm and its the love of yours that keeps me elated.Thank you so much
.M loving all the comments from you all.New
readers thank you so much...Muahhh Great to have you all here...Thank
Thank you so much Neilu,Adu,Mini,Ramya,Arti.Poo .Silver fairy ,samia,Kayte,kalika.Everyone..Special thanks goes to the newbies.Thanks For breaking your silence and your lovely comments.If anyone wants PM's do buddy me..Also I have decided to do regular I mean daily Updates...They will be shorter but regular..Hope you are fine with this.Do let me know.Anymore SILENT LOVERS I mean READERS Please come out..Its fun out here...Thanks so much
Thanks to all my wonderful Readers
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