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An Unknown Hurt...!!! Final Episode - PAGE 15

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Brahmaputra

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Brahmaputra

Joined: 12 February 2012

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Posted: 15 September 2012 at 8:53am | IP Logged


Sooraj was confused.

Confused and flustered. Since morning, his mind has been twirling around the same thing than the jalebis he made... He looked across the panes nearer to the worship place. Is she there around...???? No, his eyes couldn't find his Sita nearer to Shri Ram's idol.
More clearly, from yesterday night, Sandhya was behaving a little different. She was just angry... Though she was not showing it, he sensed it from her gestures.

Making jalebis, Sooraj kept thinking - Sandhya ji aise achanak naaraz kyun hai mujhse? Main ne aisa kya galti ki...? Ya phir koi aur wajah se pareshan hai..? Ab dukaan mein itna bheed hai..., kaise jaa sakta hoon? Thodi der ke baad jaakar pooch leta hoon...! (Why Sandhya is angry? What mistake I did? Or is there anything else that disturbs her? The shop is full with customers that I can't go now. I should go after sometime & try to know what happened.)


It was about to be noon.

His sweet shop was near to empty. Handing over duties to Bapuda, Sooraj moved towards home... His eyes, moreover his heart, searched for his dove all over... He felt more disappointed as he couldn't find her anywhere. He moved inside kitchen, but she was not there too... While stepping out, he saw her coming towards kitchen with a vessel in her hand..

Crossing one hand towards door, he stopped her.
He softly enquired- kya baat hai yeh Sandhya ji?.
(what is the matter Sandhya ji?)

Sandhya- kya hai Sooraj ji?

Sooraj- aap yeh jo kar rahi hai? (that you're doing)

Sandhya- main? Main kya kar rahi hoon Sooraj ji? Aap raaste se hat jaayiye, mujhe rasoi mein bahut kaam hai! (I..what am I doing? Now you kindly move from my way. I've lot of stuffs to deal with in kitchen)


Sooraj moved his other hand also and she stepped backwards... She got circled in his arms against the wall... 
He moved more closer to her with a naughty smile... With a glitter in eyes that kept saying a thousand wo ayi nees, he whispered- kya baat hai Sandhya ji? Batayiye na! (what is the matter, won't you tell me?)

She pulled her hands upward and pushed him back with the vessel.

Walking inside, she said- Sooraj ji, mujhe kaam karne do. (let me do this work)

He also moved inside. ..She was busy cooking...

Sooraj(turing towards the stove)- kya baat hai Sandhya ji? Aap mujhse naaraz kyon hai? Kya galti kiya hai main ne? (what happened? Why are you angry with me? What mistake did I do?)

Meanwhile Sandhya stepped behind him to get something & he continued- batayiye na Sandhya ji. Main ne jaan boochkar kuch nahin kiya. Agar anjaane mein koi galti ho gayi toh maafi maang raha hoon. Abhi toh batayiye na. (tell me Sandhya ji. I deliberately didn't do anything. And I'm asking forgiveness for unknown mistake. At least now tell me.)

No answer.

Sooraj- batayiye na Sandhya ji. Kya baat hai?

Again no answer.

Sooraj (turning back)- batt..tt... He bemused seeing Bhabho standing at door, glaring him.

Sooraj (floundering)- woh...woh...Bhabho..main.. paa..

Bhabho- haan...haan..chora, manne pata hain tujhe paani chahiye. Aaj kal tanne toh inna pyaaz lagi hai ki poore Pushkar ke liye rakha hua paani ek hi baar pi lega... (son, I know you need water. These days you're so thirsty that you may even drink water for the whole city at a time)

Sooraj- Bhabho...wo..woh...

Bhabho- ab ke wo wo kar raha hai? Jaa, apne dukaan ja. Paani abhi rakh ke ayi hoon. Tu toh idhar aise bhatak raha hai jiase thari beendni tujhe pilane paani muh mein lekar ghoom rahi hai...haye mhara raam ji, sirf mhara karam hi kyun foota hai...? (now what wo wo you're doing. Go your shop. I've kept water there. And you're roaming here like your wife is walking everywhere with her mouth filled with water for you)

Sooraj desperately walked towards his shop.


After sometime, Sandhya came there to give his lunch. She was frowned and looked as if she has been hurted deeply...
She just kept the lunch box on table saying- Sooraj ji, aap ka khana.
(your food)

Sooraj reached near table, grumbling like an innocent boy- ab toh batayiye na Sandhya ji. Kya hua hai aap ko? Aisi kaun si baat hai jo aap ko itna zyaada pareshan kar rahi hai? (now you tell me. What happened to you? What is the matter that troubles you this much?)

She didn't say a word, she was gazing somewhere in busy street...

Softening his voice, with all love and care he has for her, he spoke- aap mujhe...mujhe batayiye na. (you tell me)

Sandhya (frowned and hesitated)-  Mujhe bahut zyada kaam hai Sooraj ji. Main jaa rahi hoon. (I've a lot of stuffs to do. I'm going) and she walked back...

With a heavy heart, Sooraj sat on chair- Sandhya ji subhah se bahut kaam kar rahi hai... Ghar mein sirf Bhabho hi hai unhe madat karne ke liye... Aur shayad isi wajah se unhe mujhse baat karne ke liye waqt nahin mil raha hoga... Par Sandhya ji itni der tak mujhse naaraz kaise rah sakti hai? (Sandhya is doing a lot of work these days. And only Bhabho is there to help her.So she might not be able to find enough time to talk with me. But how can she stay this long angry with me)...


Like a dove gathering grains fallen down from panicles, Sooraj slowly gleaned all his memories twined with her...He blushed at times... He opened lunch box remembering she has never been like this... He was only knowing she is deeply hurt... .. .. And that hurted him more than her not talking to him... His heart twirled in pang and panic... Remembering her gloaming eyes, he slowly closed his lunch box, not having even a single morsel... He was not hopeless, but he knew he will be restless until she steps out of her restlessness...


continued here..







Edited by June_Anne_Mary - 29 September 2012 at 9:50am

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sita11

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sita11

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Posts: 26397

Posted: 15 September 2012 at 9:07am | IP Logged
hey that was really cool fan fiction of SurYa Cool
hope the creatives get sum cool ideas from your fan ficBig smile

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farhana874

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farhana874

Joined: 08 April 2012

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Posted: 15 September 2012 at 9:12am | IP Logged
Aaiyo...Aisa kyon! Aisa kya ho gaya!!!
Why our beendni is naraaz naraaz!Confused
Why are you making our chhora 'pareshan'!Ouch

JAMbu...waiting for next part...Hurry up...you made me restless!Embarrassed

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Tacker_Holic

IF-Rockerz

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Joined: 07 December 2011

Posts: 7522

Posted: 15 September 2012 at 9:31am | IP Logged
This was really quite amazing! Clap This touched my heart, you didnt reveal why Sandhya was sad? Confused But it was really a touching and emotional post! Embarrassed HeartIt made me cry a little at Sooraj's efforts! Cry You really are an innovative and creative writer! You can go far in this profession, I would definatly read your books! Big smile Star

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-Amli-

IF-Sizzlerz

-Amli-

Joined: 10 January 2012

Posts: 11344

Posted: 15 September 2012 at 9:33am | IP Logged
JAMi.. This is really touchy n emotional written script..Clap Star Clap I just flow with emotions while going through each line n able to put myself in place Sooraj n how he's feeling at present..Ouch

It always feel miserable when your loved ones ignore you n not reveal their pain.Confused

Old wounds refreshed in my brain while reading it..Ouch


Edited by ami_dabh - 15 September 2012 at 10:00am

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Haych.Are

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Haych.Are

Joined: 30 March 2012

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Posted: 15 September 2012 at 9:42am | IP Logged
This is amazing, your really good Clap
Please continue, i would love to read more, and am really curious as to why Sandhya's upset! Big smile

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SAIBALROUTH

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SAIBALROUTH

Joined: 08 January 2012

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Posted: 15 September 2012 at 9:49am | IP Logged
Amazing post JAM, Clap Clap I am equally keen like others to know what will happen next, and I am really confused as to why Sandhya is annoyed with Suraj Confused

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Manjuu

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Manjuu

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Posted: 15 September 2012 at 10:02am | IP Logged
Wow...superb JAM ji Thumbs Up poor suraj..so wanted to know why sandhya is angry
Day Dreaming

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