Posted: 06 September 2012 at 9:44pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by -Aarya-
@RTH, my apologies if the discussion came off little vague, let me try to clarify ...
I believe Monogamy is the best practiced until a couple changes the status to open marriage by rules. Though married couple focus on still keeping an outward appearance of traditional
monogamy while practicing what basically amounts to polygamy behind
closed doors which I conclude as cheating. The norms of monogamy are questioned, are they the norms ? I also question the rights and needs of the second partner in monogamy relationship?
So basically you are saying that monogamy eventually breaks down. That people put on the happy family front but carry on affairs on the sly or the couple eventually separates/divorces - and that amounts to cheating.
You have a valid point there. But I don't think monogamy is the problem. The real problem is that monogamy is the expected norm. Monogamy is not for everybody. You have to reach a point in life where you truly desire and need monogamy. Society needs to stop expecting that everyone will experience that. As I mentioned earlier that any relationship that is forced by family or society is cheating oneself.
I also don't think monogamy is meant to be permanent. And I'll agree that death do us apart etc. are all frivolous formalities. Life changes all the time. Today you may need that monogamy and commitment, tomorrow life may make you feel otherwise. It happens and people should be ready to accept changes and part amicably when need be. As long as there was full faithful monogamy during the commitment period and no affair was involved I don't see it as cheating.
At the same time I think monogamy is truly the best way for some people. Many people will have the ability to enter a monogamous relationship, be happy, fulfilled and keep it unto death.