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mermaid_QT
IF-Sizzlerz
Joined: 25 September 2005
Posts: 11613
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If one has taught their children their limits, difference between responsibility and privilege, one would not need to sit and hawk around them
So while teaching children their limits, YOU WILL GIVE THEM A LESSON AGAIST VIRTUAL FLIRTS and the HARM they could cause??
Parenting 101: Never give out private information over the internet
Parenting 102: Convey to the kids, dont do anything you would be embrassed to tell me or your mom
mermaid_QT
IF-Sizzlerz
Joined: 25 September 2005
Posts: 11613
that some people could refrain from moral policing. Yet, they sometimes intrude in order to maintain the DECORUM of virtual space and I see nothing wrong in that. For those indulging in flirting that crosses limits of decency (through suggestive words), I think private chat rooms and private messengers are great media.
sareg
IF-Dazzler
Joined: 10 January 2006
Posts: 3976
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If one has taught their children their limits, difference between responsibility and privilege, one would not need to sit and hawk around them
So while teaching children their limits, YOU WILL GIVE THEM A LESSON AGAIST VIRTUAL FLIRTS and the HARM they could cause??
Parenting 101: Never give out private information over the internet
Parenting 102: Convey to the kids, dont do anything you would be embrassed to tell me or your mom
I dont think moral policing=caring,
For me it gets to a level where one tells others not to do things, b'cos it is the wrong thing to do, and generally the answer to "why" is, this is how good kids behave, this is how my religion or my upbringing or my culture tells me.(People hid behind that garb when they have no other valid reasons, this is something they wanted to do in their time, but were told that religion/culture does not allow them to do it, that to a level is jealousy)
For me that is wrong, in that time things were different, you cant apply situations from another generation to this one
Many a times, kids would listen to that sermon out of respect of age.But it is going to PO that kid, it is like throwing gasoline on fire and that kid would want to do that thing more than anything and at that point the parent loses the child for no reason
Minnie
IF-Veteran Member
Joined: 20 September 2004
Posts: 8640
eggyji, could you please translate that in English.....
mermaid_QT
IF-Sizzlerz
Joined: 25 September 2005
Posts: 11613
I dont think moral policing=caring,
I think that it is situation and individual-based. I care for several of my jjkn friends who are silent readers here, and I genuinely love them and would never want anyone of them in trouble because of internet predator. Believe me I am not the only one who watches out for fellow IFians. 14 is young age! Sometimes, the damaging words could me subtle, confusing and unexpected. If one thinks it is NOMB, they are right in their own mind . Ofcourse it is their parents's responsibility and ofcourse parents are doing their job right, but IMO, having an additional caring DI on web will not hurt them .
For me it gets to a level where one tells others not to do things, b'cos it is the wrong thing to do, and generally the answer to "why" is, this is how good kids behave, this is how my religion or my upbringing or my culture tells me.(People hid behind that garb when they have no other valid reasons, this is something they wanted to do in their time, but were told that religion/culture does not allow them to do it, that to a level is jealousy)
Policing is not about just telling children what is wrong and what is the limit of flirting. It is about telling them that predators are out there and there are no indications of them, but one's own judgement.
Sometimes, policing is also to remind your friends and yourself that they/ we could be unfortunately looking like a predator if we have that repeated tone/ talk in a shared space 
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For me that is wrong, in that time things were different, you cant apply situations from another generation to this one.
Many a times, kids would listen to that sermon out of respect of age.But it is going to PO that kid, it is like throwing gasoline on fire and that kid would want to do that thing more than anything and at that point the parent loses the child for no reason
I completely agree with all the above. Vineet, I detest the word RESPECT for AGE thrown at me too 
! and i would never police someone and use authority for being older. But being caring and being wiser does give me the right in some occasions and by using an equal level of friendship and guidance, one never has to distance their kids / virtual YOUNG friends.
sareg
IF-Dazzler
Joined: 10 January 2006
Posts: 3976
I dont think moral policing=caring,
I think that it is situation and individual-based. I care for several of my jjkn friends who are silent readers here, and I genuinely love them and would never want anyone of them in trouble because of internet predator. Believe me I am not the only one who watches out for fellow IFians. 14 is young age! Sometimes, the damaging words could me subtle, confusing and unexpected. If one thinks it is NOMB, they are right in their own mind . Ofcourse it is their parents's responsibility and ofcourse parents are doing their job right, but IMO, having an additional caring DI on web will not hurt them .
For me it gets to a level where one tells others not to do things, b'cos it is the wrong thing to do, and generally the answer to "why" is, this is how good kids behave, this is how my religion or my upbringing or my culture tells me.(People hid behind that garb when they have no other valid reasons, this is something they wanted to do in their time, but were told that religion/culture does not allow them to do it, that to a level is jealousy)
Policing is not about just telling children what is wrong and what is the limit of flirting. It is about telling them that predators are out there and there are no indications of them, but one's own judgement.
I think that is the role of the parent or a moderator if it falls beyond the rules of the website
Sometimes, policing is also to remind your friends and yourself that they/ we could be unfortunately looking like a predator if we have that repeated tone/ talk in a shared space -
I think it is telling someone how to act in public, if someone wants to make a spectactle of themself, that is their prerogative, again, I think that is the role of the parent or a moderator if it falls beyond the rules of the website
If no rules of the website are broken but someone finds it offensive that becomes that persons issue, that person can report it to the moderator and if the moderator does not find it offensive, maybe that person is the one who is being oversensitive and should not be there
For me that is wrong, in that time things were different, you cant apply situations from another generation to this one.
Many a times, kids would listen to that sermon out of respect of age.But it is going to PO that kid, it is like throwing gasoline on fire and that kid would want to do that thing more than anything and at that point the parent loses the child for no reason
I completely agree with all the above. Vineet, I detest the word RESPECT for AGE thrown at me too ! and i would never police someone and use authority for being older. But being caring and being wiser does give me the right in some occasions and by using an equal level of friendship and guidance, one never has to distance their kids / virtual YOUNG friends.
I know what you mean, beleive me I have been in this dilemna and had a argument with a senior member regards this
Later on, I also met a person who was on the other side of the sermon and looking at the reaction of the person receiving the sermon, I realized that sermon had been counterproductive.
No offense taken
Thanks Tania! I am glad we are all on the same page when it comes to virtual flirting and the evil it can become unless BOTH individuals and reposible and into it and move on to their own private space when the talk is more of an adult nature instead of making wrong impression of oneself in a public shared space - especially such as IF where posters in early teens are in big numbers
Predators are very discrete, one thing in common most of the conversation they have in public forum is extremely harmless, the ones in private messaging is the real thing
that is why I am against moral policing, that drives harmless conversation onto private messaging, where no-one has control but those two individuals and for underage children it is the riskiest thing
mermaid_QT
IF-Sizzlerz
Joined: 25 September 2005
Posts: 11613
. ) ignore the police/ or should report the police in turn for that
with you! Your parenting pointers are the right thing and there is only so much people other than parents can / should do when it comes to saving their friends from predators- who come in discrete fashion.
between funny flirting on web and making it more personal or of sexual nature. I frankly support and even indulge in the former, while I have negative feelings regarding the LATTER in an Internet community where membership is open to children over 14. That is when unasked-for-policing comes in.
mermaid_QT
IF-Sizzlerz
Joined: 25 September 2005
Posts: 11613
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