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Phir Subah Hogi
Phir Subah Hogi

Sar Dhakai

Saviosaraff Senior Member
Saviosaraff
Saviosaraff

Joined: 11 July 2012
Posts: 485

Posted: 10 August 2012 at 12:53am | IP Logged

Basically the Sardhakai ritual is when a Thakur chooses a girl to be his official mistress.  It is somewhat like a wedding ritual but there are no pheras taken.  The girl gets to wear sindoor and a mangalsutra but that is it.   Once girls start to do Raai, they can only get Sardhakai done and can never marry as per the traditions." 'Rai and Sar Dhakai are actually prostitution'  But what sets this community apart is that the men of this community don't do any work. The community has certain old customs, associated with the dance form that the girls have to abide by.

Their life is one of dancing and prostitution and they go with any Thakur who can pay the price for the night. Otherwise how will she support her family through the years?

Sardhakai is more like the ritual of first night...when a young Bedni starts out in this "profession" the Thakur who pays the biggest amount gets to spend first night with her. Its the price of her innocence! Once her innocence is gone, she can be used by any Thakur who can pay her price. 

 

Sexual Service : in the name of Sardakhai, prostitution is legalised in the community. That legalization happens through application of Sindoor and all paraphernalia.

The men in the Bedni tribe can marry only outside their community.  A child born from this marriage is considered chaste and they are desirable than the children born from the Bedni-Thakur union.  The Bednis cannot marry. 

Once sardhakai is done, officially, the women cannot engage in sexual services to other men until relieved by her patron. 

  1. Until she is the mistress, she can live with the Thakur in his own premises where he resides or where he decides to put her up.
  2. She can continue to do Raai dance and earn income from it.
  3. Once relieved, she can go back to her community.

4.      If there are any children born to this young woman they do not get to have their father's name.

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XAiShBaBy08Xkomal07HillyloveForeverSHINeeShellJAVinnie79PutijaChalhov

ShellJA IF-Rockerz
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Posted: 10 August 2012 at 5:38am | IP Logged
Very interesting post.  Was this post completely for education and interest or where you trying to make a point?  Start a discussion?
komal07 IF-Dazzler
komal07
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Posts: 4974

Posted: 10 August 2012 at 5:51am | IP Logged
Wonderful post ... Well the reality is 1000 time bitter than we 're seeing in this show... anyway ...thanks so much for sharing this interesting piece of information ... 

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ForeverSHINee

Saviosaraff Senior Member
Saviosaraff
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Posts: 485

Posted: 10 August 2012 at 6:06am | IP Logged
Shell16
There were many on the forum insisting that Sardhakai was better so the post on exactly what is Sar Dhakai.
 
Yes komal07  realty is 1000 times bitter. 
 

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ShellJA

pyar-ishk IF-Stunnerz
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Posted: 10 August 2012 at 6:19am | IP Logged
Awesome post

I'm confuse I thought the women can only sleep with the Thakur that does there sar dhakai but the Thakur can have more the one bedni. The rai is only for them to entertain the thakur by dancing and they throw money on them and only if you new like in the case of Sugni they can throw that cloth on your head. Now you're saying bedni sleep with more the one Thakur Confused so if the have children how will they know whose the father Ouch

Sleeping with one thakur was the only thing that is even digestible about this whole customs but now you're saying it can me more then one man Dead

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HillyloveForeverSHINee

Saviosaraff Senior Member
Saviosaraff
Saviosaraff

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Posts: 485

Posted: 10 August 2012 at 6:25am | IP Logged

Yes pyar-ishk  Actual Sardhakai is plain prostitution in a legalised way.  Remember TJS telling his wife after his night with Gulb.  "What is new i have brought home so many Bednis why so frustrated with this one"

That was the reason i checked the net for what is Sardhakai.  There have been earlier posts too on the same topic.
komal07 IF-Dazzler
komal07
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Joined: 23 April 2007
Posts: 4974

Posted: 10 August 2012 at 6:31am | IP Logged
sardhakai can never be a better idea at all .. i dun think anybody want here sar dhakai ... sar dhaki is the most horrible  nd awful custom i hv ever cum across .. 

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1gunjan7

komal07 IF-Dazzler
komal07
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Posts: 4974

Posted: 10 August 2012 at 6:39am | IP Logged
@ Rani ...  remember when sugni did rai on adi amu engagement ceremony .. there were thakurs saying sumthing like this " ghare ka pani to hai nahi ... nadi hia thora sa hum pee len ge thora tum pee lena ..." nd they were actually making a line  fro sugni by saying 1st i ll have her then u can hv then others can hv ... i guess they tried to show it bt not in a proper way

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pyar-ishk

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