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Swaron FF: Living the dream; Thread Two (Page 20)

Sawyer_Tom IF-Dazzler
Sawyer_Tom
Sawyer_Tom

Joined: 22 March 2012
Posts: 3573

Posted: 07 August 2012 at 12:26pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by nish22

Originally posted by Sawyer_Tom

Originally posted by nish22

When you updating?!

Not in the foreseeable future. Disapprove

How far in the future?! :(

As long as it's going to take me to get this block out of my head!Ouch

Twinkle_d3 Goldie
Twinkle_d3
Twinkle_d3

Joined: 01 May 2012
Posts: 1914

Posted: 08 August 2012 at 3:27am | IP Logged
pls update soon..

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Sawyer_Tom

Sawyer_Tom IF-Dazzler
Sawyer_Tom
Sawyer_Tom

Joined: 22 March 2012
Posts: 3573

Posted: 09 August 2012 at 12:17pm | IP Logged

Phew! Finally! This is THE longest Chapter that I've ever written and as Rafi said I ought to go out with a big bang so I'm updating it all at once. Though I'm not completely satisfied with the way this Chapter has come out and I really think that I can do a bit better but if I prolong it any longer I don't think I'm ever going to post it. So here it is, the last Chapter of this FF. Enjoy. Or not. Ermm 

Also this Chapter is dedicated to all my Acerbic buddies who fought so valiantly to reserve a post for this update. LOL

And pardon any grammatical/spelling error. As you can see this Chapter is too long to proof read it. Stern Smile

Chapter 33

"For the first time, both of them felt carefree. And that feeling was too precious to be allowed to slip through their hands. So they curled their fingers tightly around it, caging it in. It was then that they realized the irony of the situation so they opened their palms and let it fly. But in didn't lose sight of them. It came back and sat on their shoulder, unburdening them of everything else. Now they were carefree in the most quintessential sense."

                                                                     --Sawyer_Tom (That's me!Big smile), Living the dream.

 

She scooped up a spoonful of soup and slowly slurped it, all the while looking at Kankshita.

Ever since Kankshita had come to live with her she had this nagging worry that she wasn't being much of a sister to her.

We had a better relationship when we were strangers she thought.

This was new for her. She didn't know how to be a sister. She didn't know how an elder sister behaved. She just knew that she was doing a bad job of it.

Its new for her too she thought. It's my job to make her feel comfortable with me.

 She stared idly at her, trying to find a way to connect with her. They finished their dinner and after dumping the dishes in the sink, Kankshita turned to go to her room.

"Kankshita wait! You...you want me to...should I make your hair today?" she asked, hoping she wouldn't laugh at her face and run away.

Kankshita looked at her in astonishment.

"You'd do that?" she asked, hopefully.

"Yes!" Sharon exclaimed relieved.

"Okay. Let me get my comb." She said.

A few minutes later Sharon was sitting on the couch and Kankshita was sitting in front of her, on the floor. Sharon dexterously ran the comb through her hair, untangling it and making it fall in smooth, wavy curls.

Kankshita's eyes travelled around the living room and stopped suddenly at the ornately framed picture placed on the mantelpiece.

"One second!" she said. She got up, took the picture off the mantel and once again came and sat cross-legged on the floor.

She looked intently at the picture and saw her parents and her sister smiling happily at the camera, with the beach in the background, nicely accentuating their joy.

"Tell me about your...our mother." She said, still looking at the picture.

"She was the most beautiful and the most loving woman on this planet." Said Sharon, fondly, wistfully. "She was kind and considerate and brave and the best cook in the world. If you ever tasted the food she-"

She stopped abruptly, mentally reprimanding herself.

"And Father?" asked Kankshita, trying to blink away her tears.

"He...he...was a good father. He tried his best." Said Sharon.

There was a calm silence for a while and Kankshita looked oddly at peace. There right then, Sharon felt an odd connection to her.

I guess pain does bring people closer to each other she thought.

"Sharon didi, do you think you'll ever be this happy again?" asked Kankshita, pointing at the seven-year-old Sharon.

She paused for a minute before replying.

"Yes." She said, thinking about Swayam. "Yes, I will be."

                                                ____________________________

He was lying down on his bed, staring fixedly at the ceiling.

It had been a week since she had started practicing with them and it had been a week since he had properly talked to her.

He wasn't angry at her. Not anymore. He was, however, still a little pissed at her.

Well who wouldn't be if suddenly, one fine day, they came to know that their best friend had been lying to them for the better part of the time span of their friendship?

He didn't think he was overreacting.

Since the time he had come to know about the dance thing, he had been wondering why she didn't tell him from the very beginning. Why keep it a secret? A small part of him felt that maybe he was being a bit too harsh. She might be having a good enough reason. But the bigger, louder part of him squashed that voice to a pulp. That part felt betrayed. Felt that he had been taken for a ride. He felt like a complete fool.

As he felt his teeth clenching and his hand curling into a fist, he realized that he was only getting worked up. He took a deep, calming breath and tried to shift his thoughts elsewhere.

But that was easier said than done.

All his thoughts eventually came and centred on her. All of them. Just the other day he was having Chinese and he remembered thinking how much she loved Chinese food. And that had led him to smile like the freakin' Cheshire cat.

He felt frustrated and...powerless. He couldn't control his own thoughts! He had thought that with time it would get easier, it wouldn't be so out-of-hand.

But apparently, Love's not Time's fool.

Great! He thought bitterly, hitting the pillow forcefully in his frustration. Now I'm quoting Shakespeare! Ughhh!! Love SUCKS!

 But did it really?

He was reflecting thoughtfully on that rhetorical question when suddenly he heard a noise.

Clunk!

He thought he was imagining it but then he heard it again.

Clunk!

He sat up on the bed and tried to determine its source.

Clunk!

Clunk!

Clunk!

Someone was throwing stones at his window.

He got up and went to the window. He pulled it open and looked out.

There she was standing with all her glory, dressed in a pair of cut-off shorts and a hoodie.

MY hoodie!

And he couldn't help but smile.

No it didn't. He decided. It didn't suck.

She was looking up at him, squinting her eyes from the Sun. It wasn't the scorching Sun of the Summer. It was the calm Winter Sun, muted and subdued. The day itself, in fact, had acquired a pleasant feel. There were no clouds in the sky and the sky itself was more blue than grey. Even with the lack of clouds the Sun wasn't too bright. It shone lazily as if trying to assure the people that Winter wasn't as bad as they thought. But the chilly air told a different story all together. The wind swirled it around mischievously, making it crawl up people's spines and making them suddenly shiver, having a gala time.

He suddenly remembered he was supposed to be angry with her. He wiped the smile clean off his face and instead replaced it with a stern frown.

"What the hell are you doing, Sharon?" he called out to her.

"I'm throwing stones at your window." She said, smiling cheekily up at him.

"Gee, I didn't notice!" he retorted dryly.

"Come down, Shekhawat!" she said, commandingly.

"Go away, Raiprakash!" he said just as authoritatively, attempting to close the window.

Another stone was pelted at him and he ducked instinctively, missing it by inches.

"Geez Sharon!" he yelled. "I could have got hurt! And anyways, why the hell are you throwing stones at my window? You can call or message, you know! We don't live in the Stone Ages anymore."

"Pun intended." He added after a pause.

"This is more fun!" she said. "And that pun sucks!"

He stuck his tongue out.

"Go home, Sharon." He said.

"I'm not going anywhere until you come down!" she said, crossing her arms stubbornly.

"You don't have the patience for that!" he said, smiling triumphantly.

"Wanna bet?" she said.

He was about to say yes when he realized that she was trying to indulge him. So he shook his head and once again said-

"Go home, Sharon."

"Oh c'mon Swayam!" she said, a little annoyed now. "I know you're not really angry at me anymore! So why don't you just cut the crap, come down and let me apologize!"

He thought about it for a few seconds and was about to deny it when she said-

"Don't even try to deny it! Not to me!"

He stood there unable to say anything else.

"Now come down!" she ordered.

He looked stubbornly at her but she had already started to move towards the beach, which lay beyond his backyard.

"I'm waiting for you on the beach. Come fast." Saying this, she pushed past the wooden gate that separated the yard from the beach, removed her shoes and dumped them on the side and jogged towards the sea.

He contemplated for a minute or two, before putting on his shoes and running down the steps.

                                                ____________________________

She closed her eyes on a whim and decided that she would let her other senses guide her today.

She listened to the soft murmur of the white, foamy waves, gently sprawling on the sand. She listened to the sharp, faraway cry of a bird, maybe a seagull, as it grew fainter and fainter with each passing second. She felt the coarse, grainy sand filtering between her toes, making them tickle. She felt the cold, sea breeze blowing through her hair, making them dance wildly. She heard the soft squish of the sand as someone's feet throbbed gently through it. She felt his presence as he came closer and closer to her, finally plopping himself on the sand, next to her. And lastly, she felt a smile crawl swiftly across her face as she heard him say-

"By the way, when are you planning on returning my hoodie?"

She opened her eyes and turned her head sideways to look at him, her smile growing in magnitude.

"Not in the foreseeable future." She said. She liked this hoodie too much. There was no way in hell he was ever getting it back.

"But it's my favourite!" he said, his forehead clouding.

"Well, now it's my favourite. So deal with it. Besides you had my favourite scarf for about seven months! Consider this payback." She said, stubbornly pushing out her chin.

"Fine." He mumbled and looked away.

"Swayam." She said and paused, waiting for him to interrupt her. But when he didn't she continued. "Swayam, I really am sorry for not telling you about the dance thing. I know now that I should have."

"Why didn't you?" Asked Swayam, looking fiercely at her.

"When I came to know that you had seen me dancing I did want to tell you. I came to tell you that but before I could you told me that you had already found her. You have to understand Swayam that at that time I had come to know that my father blamed me for my mother's death. I was not in a position to dance. I had lost my will, my reason to dance. So I thought that if you had gotten your dancer there wouldn't be any need for me to tell you that it was in fact me. I didn't want to disappoint you." She said, looking away.

"Sharon, you can never disappoint me!" He said, quietly. "Even if you couldn't dance didn't you think that maybe I deserved to know the truth? You really should have told me."

"I know. And when I did start dancing again you were the first person I wanted to tell. But you were acting all moody and distant and you didn't even give me a chance to tell you." She said.

They stayed quiet for a while after that both lost in their own thoughts, wondering whether they could have avoided this mess in the first place.

"Well, am I forgiven then?" She asked, after a prolonged silence.

"Yes." He said, giving the teeniest of smiles. "Yes you are."

A sharp 'Yes!' escaped from her mouth and in her excitement she jumped at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him mightily hard. He, not anticipating this gesture, toppled over and with a soft poof, he landed on the melting bed of sand, taking her along with him. His arms had made their way around her body, more out of instinct and surprise than anything else. But the decision of strengthening his hold on her was all his own. She lifted her head from his chest and looked at him, wanting to apologize. But something in his eyes, dried up all the words from her mouth.

He got up and she was now sitting on his lap. She quickly scrambled off of him and sat back on the sand, mentally reprimanding her heart for beating so erratically.  

He looked at her, amusedly. For the first time since he had known her, he saw her...being shy. He had NEVER seen her shy away like this before. And was that...was that...colour crawling up her cheeks?

He felt oddly pleased with himself. So much so that he found himself openly grinning.

"Let's go!" she said, suddenly looking up.

"Go where?" he asked, confusedly.

"It's your birthday today." She said, matter-of-factly.

"Oh?" he said, his mood immediately turning grim.

"That's all you have to say?" she said, raising her eyebrows.

He turned his head to look at the sea, his eyes turning misty.

"Swayam, what's wrong?" she asked, sensing his mood change.

He didn't appear to have heard her.

She placed her hand on his shoulder jerking him out of his thoughts.

"Nothing!" he said, smiling. "It's just that we don't celebrate my birthday."

She felt a dull pain squirming inside her.

"Why?" she managed to ask.

"Probably because my parents have forgotten when it actually is." He said, giving up his attempt to smile. "My sister used to celebrate it with me but after she...she died I didn't feel like celebrating it anymore."

She felt herself crumbling inside, but she resolutely ignored it and said, getting up-

"Let's go for a drive."

She extended her hand and he caught her. She pulled him up and they headed towards her car.

                                                ____________________________

"By the way, did you know that Chantel was the one who send that lowlife, son of a bitch after you?" he said, the lines on his face hardening. The wind glided smoothly and atrociously through their hair as Sharon pressed her foot on the accelerator.

He saw her hold on the steering wheel tighten and her jaw clenching. Both of them were wearing shades to protect their eyes from the howling wind and the dust that had been inextricably mingled with it. So he couldn't see the rush of emotions gliding through her eyes right now. He knew she was still traumatised by that incident and he wanted to kill that bas***d for making her go through that.

He placed his hands on hers and his touch automatically made her hands loosen their hold on the wheel, instantly relaxing.

"I won't let anything happen to you, Sharon." He whispered quietly, making her wonder if he had actually said it.

"So was she put into prison?" she asked, stoically.

"No," he said. And after a disturbing pause continued, "She was sent to a mental institution."

After that, neither of them could understand what had gotten into them as their bodies began shaking with uncontrollable laughter. Maybe they couldn't fathom the seriousness of the situation. Maybe they had been through too much to care about what was right and what was wrong. They tried to sober themselves down but after what she had done they found it extremely difficult to muster any sort of sympathy for her. So instead they laughed.

After that the mood became much lighter and the ambiance was devoid of any sort of tension. For the first time, both of them felt carefree. And that feeling was too precious to be allowed to slip through their hands. So they curled their fingers tightly around it, caging it in. It was then that they realized the irony of the situation so they opened their palms and let it fly. But in didn't lose sight of them. It came back and sat on their shoulder, unburdening them of everything else. Now they were carefree in the most quintessential sense.

"Well, are you going to tell me where are we going?" he asked, after a while.

"On a date." She said, flatly.

He did a double take.

He stared at her for a while, trying to decipher what she meant by that. When he couldn't make head or tails of it he asked-

"Let me get this straight. You just asked me out and without waiting for my permission, you are already taking me out on a date?"

"Yes." She said, not looking at him.

"And what if I say no?" he asked.

"I'll just say- too late! We are already here." She said, cheerily, as she brought the car to a halt.

 He looked around and a smile adjusted itself firmly on his face. They were at their favourite spot. He had missed coming here with her. It had been a long time. He felt fiercely elated.

Little did he know that it was just the beginning.

It was late afternoon and the sun was just preparing itself to dive into the unknown sea of the horizon. The lone cherry tree that stood at the edge of the cliff was almost robbed of its beauty. It now stood naked, with most of its faint pink blossoms lying peacefully on the ground. A few, however, had braved the winter and were now clinging to its branches, holding on for dear life. But the wind was more unforgiving than they thought. Even as he watched, the wind rushed at them menacingly and plucked them off, making them float to the ground in a lifeless slumber.

He walked to the edge and looked down at the town spread out before him. It was much too early for the lights to be lighted but it still looked extremely magical.

After a minute or so, he turned around and to his surprise he saw Sharon standing under the tree on the soft bed of grass that had grown at the foot of the tree. Some dead and some barely alive cherry blossoms lay scattered on the grass giving the whole place a surreal look. A humongous chocolate cake was placed on that carpet of dull grass and dead petals, contrasting sharply with it.

He gawked at her for a few unbelievable seconds before she got impatient and came and took hold of his arm and dragged him towards the cake. They sat down on the grass that felt as soft as it appeared to be.

"Are you crying?" she said, smirking.

"No!" he said indignantly. "It's just that this...this is really nice." He continued, trying to maintain a poker face. "Did you bake it yourself?"

"Yeah right! I don't know how to bake a cake!" she said, looking at him like he was crazy.  "Unless you want to eat a pile of burnt crap!"

He smiled.

"You didn't have to do this you know." He said, taking the knife she offered him.

"Don't act so soppy! You really think I'll just sit idly by and watch you sulk on your birthday? You deserve this Swayam! And you deserve much more!" she said.

"Now who's acting soppy?" he smirked.

"Just shut up and cut the cake!" she said, smiling in return.

"What? Just like that? No candles?" he asked, looking mock offended.

She took out a bunch of candles from her bag and stuck them in the cake, effectively spoiling the 'Happy Birthday, Swayam' that had been creamed on it.

"Look what you did!" he said, looking at the cake in horror.

"Well you wanted the candles, didn't you? Win some, lose some." She said, shrugging.

"Well it's no use!" she said, after she tried to light the candle for the fifth time and for the fifth time the wind blew out the matchstick. "You are just going to have to fake-blow them out and make a wish!"

"Make a wish?" he said, looking sceptically at her. "Wishes don't come true, Sharon."

"Well why don't you wish for something and then we'll see?" she said, nonchalantly.

"Whatever." He said.

He proceeded to close his eyes and attempted to blow out the unlit candles. He cut a slice and stuffed it in her mouth. She in turn cut out another slice and stuffed it in his mouth.

She nibbled on the cake, all the while looking intently at him. A look of pure happiness settled upon his face and he looked so inviting with the cake stuffed in his mouth that she didn't realize what she did next, until after it had already been done.

She leaned in and pecked him lightly on the lips.

He stared at her, his eyes dilated in complete astonishment as he took in her abrupt, out-of-the-blue kiss.

She stared back, less astonished, as the gravity of the situation sunk in. She turned around and tightly shut her eyes.

He made a muffled sound, thanks to the cake stuck in his throat.

He waited for her to turn but she didn't.

The next second she felt a hand wrap around her arm and turn her around.

He looked at her intently, trying to learn the meaning behind this gesture. He saw a thin stream of emotions running across her face. But it wasn't enough.

"Open your eyes, Sharon!" he commanded, lifting her chin up.

 She obliged.

"What was that?" he asked, his gaze piercing through her.

She realized that he had two kinds of gazes. One was the normal one, that was soft and light, that just brushed past you, didn't dwell on you. And the other one, this one, would penetrate through every barrier that you've ever built around yourself and extract your very essence from your soul. Unnerving in its intensity, it had the staggering power to stop your breath, do Conga with your insides and leave you exposed and vulnerable. She both loved and hated this gaze. Right now she wasn't too sure what she felt more.

"Nothing." She managed to stammer out.

"Right! That wasn't nothing!" he said, now wrapping both his hands around her arms and pulling her closer to him. "Why did you do that Sharon?"

When she didn't answer, he got mad.

"Tell me!" he said, raising his voice.

She just looked at him mutely.

He looked at her for a few, heart-aching seconds and then left her.

Taking a deep, long breath he said-

"It okay. Let it be. Let it just hang like that for all eternity. Let's just never talk about it and continue on as if it never happened! Let's just keep this pretence up that there is nothing between us for the rest of our lives!" he finished, smiling mirthlessly.

That finally got her to open her mouth.

"Swayam I..." she started. She wanted to tell him how much she loved him but she didn't know how. Every time she looked into his eyes, she saw his love for her displayed unhesitatingly in them and it broke her to think that she wasn't good enough to deserve it. She wanted to tell him, so badly, but how could she? When he looked at her like that.

"I'm sorry Sharon. I'm sorry for thinking that you actually felt something for me! I was wrong." He said. An unbearably poignant pain entered his eyes before they turned extremely passive. Like he had stopped feeling anymore. Like he didn't want to feel anymore.

That was one look that she could never bear to see in his eyes. That hauntingly stoic look. She had seen it in her eyes and she had seen him look at her then. That wasn't something she wanted to experience. That hopelessly sinking feeling that had started weighing down upon her spurred her into action. It was one of those times, when common sense, inhibitions and baseless reasoning would be promptly thrown out of the window and the door would be opened to welcome in only raw, innermost feelings and the courage to act upon them.

"Swayam..." she began softly. But he had averted his eyes, unable to look at her anymore.

She clutched him by his collar and made him look at her. He looked at her confusedly, surprised by her abrupt behaviour.

"You're an idiot!" she said, in her usual fiery manner. Only this time her eyes had become moist. "You really think I don't feel anything for you? You're so stupid! So infuriatingly stupid! Can't you see how happy you make me? I thought I could never love anyone! That I had been broken too many times! But then you came along and made me fall in love with you! How you managed to do that I will never understand! But you did. I'm in love with you."

She was breathing hard now while he, on the other hand, was holding his breath as if afraid this might turn out to be yet another one of his elusive dreams. Unable to look him in the eyes anymore, she lowered her gaze and buried her face in his chest while still tightly clutching his collar. A minute later, he felt his T-shirt getting wet as her tears seeped through it. Cautiously at first, he let his arms go around her, resting lightly on her back. And then, as if it had just hit him, he pulled her closer still, letting himself finally, completely believe that she did love him. Unbeknownst to him, a tear fell down his cheek followed by another and then another.

They stood there, crying silently in each other's arms as the sun began to set upon their trembling figures.

She reluctantly pulled away and looked at him only to find him smirking.

"Why are you-" she started, when realization hit her smack in the face.

"You knew it, didn't you?" she said, pulling away from his embrace. "You knew it all along!"

She looked at him in mild shock and his smirk just grew wider. He pulled her back towards him and whispered roguishly in her ears-

"Of course I knew! I just wanted to hear you say it."

"You jerk!" she said, looking up at him, annoyed. "I hate you!"

"Too late!" he said, smiling, bringing her closer to him. "I love you too."

And that sapped up her annoyance in a blink and she finally began to smile. If she thought she had been happy before she was in for a huge shock.

Happiness. That word did no justice to the actual feeling. The actual feeling was so much stronger, so much more intense. It swirled within her, like a tornado. Destroying any traces of sorrow or pain or any other unimportant feeling. She felt purged of all sadness. That feeling of joy combined with Love was the most potent combination of all. It elated her, elevated her. It made her feel alive.

He held her in his arms as if there was no tomorrow. As if any minute now someone would swoop in and take her away from him. Take his life away from him. Take away his chance to feel alive again. The word love held no meaning for him without her. Without her, the world was an empty, bitter place devoid of happiness. And he didn't want to live in a world like that.

The curvaceous crescent of the moon was just beginning to shine benevolently upon them, when they realized that it had been quite a while that they had been standing like that, in each other's arms.

"Wait!" she squealed, suddenly remembering something. She stepped out of the circle of his arms, reluctantly and looked up at him.

"What?" he asked, tensing a bit.

"I forgot to give you your gift!" she said, frowning.

He relaxed visibly when he heard her say that.

"Oh but you already gave me the best gift ever!" he said, once again pulling her into the safe haven of his arms.

"Are you going to spout such cheesy lines from now on?" she asked. When he nodded solemnly, she sighed and continued-

"Well I did get you a real gift anyways! Hold on a second!" she said, running towards the car.

She opened the trunk and got, what looked like, a basket out of it and hurried back excitedly towards him.

She held the basket in his face and he saw a pair of milky brown eyes staring back at him.

"A puppy? You got me a puppy?" he said, his face breaking into a smile, reminiscent of a five year old's.

"Isn't he cute?" she said, a smile making its presence on her face as well.

"Yeah he's-" he stopped suddenly and the smile on his face disappeared abruptly. "Sharon was he in the trunk all this while?"

"Yeah!" she said.

"Are you crazy? He could have died of suffocation!" he said, looking horrified.

"Well he didn't, did he? So no harm done." She replied, nonchalantly. She put the basket down, lifted the puppy out and put him down on the grass, where he instantly started sniffing around anything that caught his fancy.

"PETA will you put in jail for animal cruelty!" he said, looking incredulously at her.

"You're overreacting!" she said, rolling her eyes at him. "Besides I left the trunk door a little open for air circulation. And I did give him some food for the road!"

"You're crazy!" he repeated, smiling.

"Oh that's nice!" she said, frowning. "I got you a gift and instead of thanking me you're calling me crazy! Ungrateful, much?"

He looked at her for a second and his eyes twinkled mischievously.

"You're right." He said, moving closer to her. "I should thank you."

She saw his expression change and stiffened, unable to move, unable to breathe.

He lifted her chin and inched closer still. Her green eyes widened as she looked into his brown ones. He wasn't smiling anymore. Just when his lips were about to make contact with hers, she let out her breath, unable to keep it in any longer. He felt the fresh torrent of her breath on his face and the next instant his lips were on hers, as he engulfed them in a sweet kiss. Her lips felt warm beneath his and for a few, indefinite moments, she let her lips enjoy that sensation. That warmth spread all through her body and too soon his lips were no longer on hers.

He kept his forehead against hers and murmured a soft 'Thank you'.

She opened her eyes not remembering when exactly she had closed them. She didn't mind that the kiss had ended so soon because she knew there were many more to come.

This was just the beginning she thought, involuntarily smiling.

And as the city below began to illuminate, they sat there under the tree, at the end of their pursuit, for they finally knew what it meant to be uninhibited and to be truly happy.

                                                ____________________________

                                                                      The End.


For those of you who felt that the Kankshita-Sharon conversation was a bit open-ended, I meant to keep it like that. They can't just get there in one go but it's a start. Thanks a lot for reading this FF and appreciating my work. It meant a lot.



Edited by Sawyer_Tom - 10 August 2012 at 8:30am

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Posted: 09 August 2012 at 12:17pm | IP Logged

Loveliest En

This is the first instalment of my comment on the last chapter of this fan fiction. I found a wonderful friend by means of this story. I have read all thirty-three of the chapters and given you my honest opinion. I have been caustic every time you got viably mushy. I have been most interested in the development of the plot. I have more or less been a staunch reader. Lastly, I have also been facilitated with one whole character inspired by me in this story. It is close to my conscience for several reasons. I thought it best to begin lauding you and this story with these. (:


The beginning of the chapter seems to me like an anti-thesis of Living the Dream. Sharon does not simply always indulge in a conversation that ends with "Yes." She said, thinking about Swayam. "Yes, I will be." The beginning that you mention time and again through the course of this story and in the footnote as well becomes palpable enough to me from this point onwards. This is a beginning for Sharon and not Swayum, though. It is beautiful to later witness that he too gets his share of the initiation solely because she does. It is indeed most inspiring, this one statement of Sharon's.


But the bigger, louder part of him squashed that voice to a pulp. That part felt betrayed. Felt that he had been taken for a ride. He felt like a complete fool. – Well written and totally relative, given I feel on lines of this a lot. Sharon keeps the one thing from Swayum which would have taken their friendship to alien levels, the one thing that would have instantly put adhesive on their love for each other and laced them together. Dance. Swayum was inspired the first time he saw his mystery dancer. It is a pity she was only his best friend and she kept him uninspired way too long.


She was looking up at him, squinting her eyes from the Sun. It wasn't the scorching Sun of the Summer. It was the calm Winter Sun, muted and subdued. The day itself, in fact, had acquired a pleasant feel. There were no clouds in the sky and the sky itself was more blue than grey. Even with the lack of clouds the Sun wasn't too bright. It shone lazily as if trying to assure the people that Winter wasn't as bad as they thought. But the chilly air told a different story all together. The wind swirled it around mischievously, making it crawl up people's spines and making them suddenly shiver, having a gala time. – This is the most metamorphic prose I have ever read. The weather and the Sun are clearly too stoic for their own good. They have only been too giving and kind so as to lend you a spot of them in your imagination. You have always very boldly yet in a mellow fashion compared Swayum and Sharon's lives to the weather and the Sun. The weather and Sun have served your ingenious metamorphic situations one too many times. I can hardly believe something can be that ethereally written. This and everything to do with the middle half of the chapter shall be impressed on my memory for a long, long time.


Swayum is like raw vanilla and Sharon, like burnt caramel. They are the same in the show as well and your interpretation of that essence of their characters is commendable. When they converse in the story, they show untamed dissimilarity. They could bite each other's necks off just by a transaction of words. It is yet more commendable how as to how there are hardly any two people more similar, not that I have read and known about. Embarrassed


She listened to the soft murmur of the white, foamy waves, gently sprawling on the sand. She listened to the sharp, faraway cry of a bird, maybe a seagull, as it grew fainter and fainter with each passing second. She felt the coarse, grainy sand filtering between her toes, making them tickle. She felt the cold, sea breeze blowing through her hair, making them dance wildly. She heard the soft squish of the sand as someone's feet throbbed gently through it. She felt his presence as he came closer and closer to her, finally plopping himself on the sand, next to her. – It is these details that your readers savour, that the ardent appreciators of your skill cherish. Congratulations for the excellence you are all about, friend. This paragraph is so soothing to read. The conversation that Swayum and Sharon engage both before and after this paragraph are like stardust on this very, very attractive piece of writing.


Here the first instalment of my comment ends. I don't which components of the chapter I will take up tomorrow or how many instalments there will be. But you sure deserve what I have to say.


This is too long to proof-read. Do use your common sense.


I love you Hug

Kanks 







Edited by Savage - 10 August 2012 at 12:33pm

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Posted: 09 August 2012 at 12:19pm | IP Logged

Dearest Nidhi,

Two days back I was pestering you with several death threats to give us the final update of your fan fiction and now I am not so sure whether I really wanted to read it. Even after getting your PM I tried postponing reading the chapter for as long as I can. (Even though I succumbed to it in 2 hours only). This all drama not because I was afraid it would be bad or something (you very well know you can't write anything bad even if your life depended on it). But because I was afraid of facing this very moment. The moment when I would finally say good bye to the awesomeness called 'Living the Dream'.

Nothing I say here would do justice to the sheer brilliance and grandiose of your writing. It is a class apart. Anything written would be less. Each chapter of this fan fiction had been carved out with such sincerity and skills that when I look back then I am completely overwhelmed and awestruck with the epic scale and magnitude of this work of yours. This is a work of a literary genius. It's majestic.

"For the first time, both of them felt carefree. And that feeling was too precious to be allowed to slip through their hands. So they curled their fingers tightly around it, caging it in. It was then that they realized the irony of the situation so they opened their palms and let it fly. But in didn't lose sight of them. It came back and sat on their shoulder, unburdening them of everything else. Now they were carefree in the most quintessential sense."

                                                                     --Sawyer_Tom, Living the dream

These lines pretty much sum up what the journey of the two characters in this fan fiction was about. But we will come to that later. First, coming to this final update. I am glad you didn't divide the chapter and decided to come with all guns blazing. This was a worthy fitting finale to this saga of Swayam and Sharon. And each aspect of your writing was at its peak while writing this chapter.

I was pleasantly surprised to see the chapter starting with Sharon and Kankshita. I was afraid that since its last chapter the story would revolve around the leads and her portion will be skipped. But glad to be proven wrong. Kankshita's character has always, unintentionally on her behalf, brought a sort of comic relief with her witty and sarcastic remark. And since she has been always shown little too mature for her age the fact that she is a ten year old girl who had lived her whole life in orphanage even when her father was alive skips our mind. In this part her character touched a nerve. And when she asked Sharon whether she could be happy like her younger self, it felt like she was asking an assurance for her future too. A beautiful scene which bring a sort of peace along with it.

'Love's not Time's fool'. If anyone needs to understand that line just read the state of mind of Swayam in which you have described him. Brilliantly written. Then came the portion which I think nobody does better than you. Describing a setting or scenery. It was amazingly written as usual. But I realised one more thing about them this time, thanks to Kankshita's comment above, that references of weather and sun that they are metaphorical description of situation in the fan fiction. I went through all chapters and thought how I couldn't realise that before? It was clearly staring in our faces all the time. Hats off to you for this brilliance.

One of the other best things of your writing is how easily you can switch from intense to lighter mode and vice versa. This fan fiction is filled with such moments and this chapter was not different. And moreover the conversation between two characters, no matter who, has always been a pleasure to read. In this chapter also the entire conversation of Swayam and Sharon whether at Swayam's house or on beach or on drive or under the cherry tree was pleasant and in completely sync with their character.

I always knew the Sharon will be the one to confess but was eager to see how she does that. And you didn't disappoint me. The confession portion came out brilliantly. Not too simple and not too cheesy and over melodramatic. But seriously Sharon had kept the puppy in trunk! And is then even defending her action? So like Sharon. May be one of the reason why this fan fiction was so easy to connect was even though basic characterisation of Swayam and Sharon were changed but still they were so like the one we see on screen that it's easy to imagine and relate with them. And it's great you stuck with those very characters without bringing any drastic change in them.

I have always wondered why you had named this work of yours 'Living the Dream'? I finally understood why. It was not for the characters but it was for your readers. We all were definitely in bliss while reading your work. It has definitely the dream like quality to it. The impact of its ending is yet not felt but I am sure the day it would I would definitely miss this. Its characters – whether Swayam, Sharon or Kankshita everyone has made major impact and their absence would be certainly felt. And most important will miss your PM in weekends informing us about the update.

I will cherish this work of yours describing the journey of two persons with troubled conscience and troubled past for more than one reason. After all during this only I discovered most of my acerbic friends here on the forum. Lastly I would only say it was my honour reading 'Living the Dream'.

- Shishir.

 

 

 



Edited by marauder - 11 August 2012 at 5:35am

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Posted: 09 August 2012 at 12:22pm | IP Logged
Dearest nidhi,

Hug Consider this the mightiest of all cyber hugs.. It intends to apologies for the late comment, thank u for such a grand finale with this brilliant updateEmbarrassed and lastly, squash u into a pulp for ending the most wonderful ff on D3 forumStern Smile!! The only reason why i postponed this comment was that i had a lot to write. Trust me i can complete this thread in no time if i allow myself to indulge in an LTD analysis but LTD is only to be enjoyed and not analysed as no analysis can do ample justice to what it stands for...
My personal journey with LTD began when it was already few chapters old and it just took me one read to fall in love with Sharon and Swayam, who by the way are the most powerful characters any ff has seen.. powerful in the sense that they never failed to create an impact. Their journey was always our journey and with every update of yours we too moved towards or away from what seemed unattainable at times and within an arm's reach otherwise, the wonderful feeling of being carefree and happy...:)

"For the first time, both of them felt carefree. And that feeling was too precious to be allowed to slip through their hands. So they curled their fingers tightly around it, caging it in. It was then that they realized the irony of the situation so they opened their palms and let it fly. But in didn't lose sight of them. It came back and sat on their shoulder, unburdening them of everything else. Now they were carefree in the most quintessential sense."

                                                                     --Sawyer_Tom (That's me!), Living the dream.


These words at the very onset tell us that this update will leave us happy and blissfully at peace. They stand for the culmination of all LTD experiences.

There couldn't have been a better end to this and i am not referring to the storyline alone. By this time all of us had predicted that swaron will confess their love for each other and anticipated the happily-ever-after feeling that would comfort us through all our future LTD marathons. I can't thank u enough for not being too experimental and giving us a tragic end.Tongue 

Anyway, what i am referring to is how spectacularly you have exploited all your signature-En styles as a writer and you couldn't hv done better. U know we love it when you describe nature. I remember a wonderful sunset description in particular, in one of the previous updates. Here again you are at your descriptive best..

"She was looking up at him, squinting her eyes from the Sun. It wasn't the scorching Sun of the Summer. It was the calm Winter Sun, muted and subdued. The day itself, in fact, had acquired a pleasant feel. There were no clouds in the sky and the sky itself was more blue than grey. Even with the lack of clouds the Sun wasn't too bright. It shone lazily as if trying to assure the people that Winter wasn't as bad as they thought. But the chilly air told a different story all together. The wind swirled it around mischievously, making it crawl up people's spines and making them suddenly shiver, having a gala time."

I never thought it was possible to characterise the elements of nature. It is amazing how they come alive in your descriptions..

"She listened to the soft murmur of the white, foamy waves, gently sprawling on the sand. She listened to the sharp, faraway cry of a bird, maybe a seagull, as it grew fainter and fainter with each passing second. She felt the coarse, grainy sand filtering between her toes, making them tickle. She felt the cold, sea breeze blowing through her hair, making them dance wildly. She heard the soft squish of the sand as someone's feet throbbed gently through it. She felt his presence as he came closer and closer to her, finally plopping himself on the sand, next to her. "

And just when i thought this was it there came another paragraph of beauty and brilliance..

It was late afternoon and the sun was just preparing itself to dive into the unknown sea of the horizon. The lone cherry tree that stood at the edge of the cliff was almost robbed of its beauty. It now stood naked, with most of its faint pink blossoms lying peacefully on the ground. A few, however, had braved the winter and were now clinging to its branches, holding on for dear life. But the wind was more unforgiving than they thought. Even as he watched, the wind rushed at them menacingly and plucked them off, making them float to the ground in a lifeless slumber.

I wasn't even done smiling when i realised that this was only the beginning. U were yet to cast ur spell.. And that happened with sharon's impulsive and spur-of-the-moment behaviour. We were caught off guard just as Swayam was and what followed.. well i don't quite remember wat i felt at that time as i finished the next half in almost one breath.. anyway what followed was something all of us had been waiting for.. Sharon confessing her feelings.. i always knew deep down that Sharon will confess more for him than for her own good and so this bit over here came as no surprise.. wat surprised me was the lump i cud feel make its way down my throat but lets not talk abt thatStern Smile

An unbearably poignant pain entered his eyes before they turned extremely passive. Like he had stopped feeling anymore. Like he didn't want to feel anymore.That was one look that she could never bear to see in his eyes. That hauntingly stoic look. She had seen it in her eyes and she had seen him look at her then. That wasn't something she wanted to experience. That hopelessly sinking feeling that had started weighing down upon her spurred her into action. It was one of those times, when common sense, inhibitions and baseless reasoning would be promptly thrown out of the window and the door would be opened to welcome in only raw, innermost feelings and the courage to act upon them.

And then came the most beautiful lines of this update.. Infact i think this is going down as my favourite bit from the entire ff. I don't know why but i can totally relate to this. 

Happiness. That word did no justice to the actual feeling. The actual feeling was so much stronger, so much more intense. 

What followed was light hearted and comforting.. i cud feel the lump subside and the silly grin made its way bk on my face as an excited Sharon gifted him a puppy..LOL As shishir mentioned earlier it is amazing how you switch from intense to lighter mode and we follow obediently, our moods changing with that of the updates..

The next few lines made me ecstatic. Their kiss was not merely a kiss.. It paved way for the emotional security and confidence had always been alien to sharon..

This was just the beginning she thought, involuntarily smiling.

This wasn't her thought alone. We thought the same and felt as confident as she did. Sometimes we only need to be patient and cliched as it sounds, love does find its way.

Now coming to Sharon and Kankshita. With them it was always like a role-reversal. We hv seen Kankshita be uncannily matured and sensible at so young an age but this update did bring out the 10year old in her who needs to come to terms with a lot of things. But she is a strong girl or rather life has made her strong and she will see to it that she finds the happiness she deserves. Perhaps she wanted to see if it was the same for Sharon. Both of them needed that assurance and m glad sharon gave it. As for it bein open ended, i din't spare much thought on it until i read ur note in the end. I think it is best to leave it this way. This is a beginning for them and they'l soon be there. On this happy note i'l wind up. 

N dat reminds me that i forgot to metion how beautifully u hv winded up this ff. Kriya and Rey's bit in the last few updates brought a different kind of freshness to this update. The no. never matters, even a handful of genuine friends can make life beautiful. And chantel.. well its sad what happend to her.. but hopefully this will do her good.. And i hvnt even elaborated on the dance factor in LTD.. So u see i hv a lot more to sayStern Smile.. can't guarantee this is my last comment on this thread!

P.S. I love u for giving us LTD nidhi!!



Edited by lyfisbeautiful - 15 August 2012 at 2:41am

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Posted: 09 August 2012 at 12:40pm | IP Logged
RES
So u won't let me start my journey with peace 
and u Shalini and Shishir Angry
Will be long before i unres this one. 


Dearest Nidhi,


When you started with LTD you were just Sawyer_Tom to me and i was just a random gal who asks for updates every now and then. I am happy that during the course of time, we have become friends.

Intially to show my appreciation i would Clap   Thumbs Up and now i can Hug Hug *Rafi style* I just love these changes Embarrassed

I had read this the moment i got that mail saying you have updated, cheered the happy ending and the sheer brilliance you wrote it with, annoying my friends to death who had no clue what i was talking about.  

There are so many things that i love about your writing, that i always fall short of words to express. I love how your characters have a back story and they progress along with the main plot. If i am writing anything at all today, the credits go to you, as u inspired me to write at the first place, which i enjoy doing now. So thanks for that. 

 

"For the first time, both of them felt carefree. And that feeling was too precious to be allowed to slip through their hands. So they curled their fingers tightly around it, caging it in. It was then that they realized the irony of the situation so they opened their palms and let it fly. But in didn't lose sight of them. It came back and sat on their shoulder, unburdening them of everything else. Now they were carefree in the most quintessential sense."

                                                                     Sawyer_Tom , Living the dream.

With every update when u give awesome quotes from others, this one up there easily is the best.

IT also hints us majorly about the update. The start of the update with Sharon's fear of not being a good elder sister to Kanks and the lil moment they share to embark a beautiful journey together, reached my heart. I felt Unlike before Kanks just didn't hold up with in her sarcastic comments but opened up. I am always amused on how you do justice to a character not your age in such realistic way. 

Swayam's conflicted feeling of being angry and betrayed but also in love to the very person can do that to you " quote shakespeare" LOL As i have said many a times before the way you describe a setting, the nature it all comes alive in front of us. 

The very first time Sharon helped Swayam in the test, who would have thought they would have become best of friends and in to a relationship later. All your updates delineate and take the story forward with an array of emotions, when i read i flow along on what i feel from within, a sinking feel of pain and then a peaceful feeling within to some smiles on my lips to the most awesome feeling of being loved, i could feel all that just in this last update of yours. Living the dream will always be there in my memory and hopefully we will soon see another masterpiece in making from you pretty soon.

Ending this comment on a even cheesier note, to see u Blushing to glory. 


Love you loads Hug 

Sudha 



Edited by Sudha-SK - 15 August 2012 at 7:12am

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Posted: 10 August 2012 at 5:29am | IP Logged
Hey plz update fast nah...

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