Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon


Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon

Anjali Decoded- Finally Figured Her Problem Out

-MeMyselfI IF-Stunnerz

Joined: 22 June 2010
Posts: 28101

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 6:13pm | IP Logged
I was very angry with Anjali after the episode aired today. However, a few hours later I began to calm down. GH and Daljeet seem very confident that they are doing justice to Anjali's character. Is there something we are missing?  Forgive me for the long post but I thought it necessary to put my thoughts down. 

Should we re-evaluate what we know about her. In my opinion, the reason that we are so confused regarding Anjali's behaviour is that we have forgotten who Anjali really is and of course, CVs are to be blamed for this as we have barely seen Anjali for the past 4 months. Same goes for the TRP audience most of whom would not have watched the serial from beginning. We have forgotten the layers of this character.

Anjali has an issue, an insecurity. She has always had it. It has been quiet obvious from the beginning, well except in the past few months as Anjali was barely there. Can you people guess what it is?

Fear of abandonment...

I googled some symptoms..and doesn't our Anjali fit this perfectly?

Panic- Doesn't she panic whenever Shaym/ASR are unreachable or not answering her queries?

Emotional Blackmail - Hasn't she emotionally blackmailed ASR many times?

Complacent Disposition - Considering how much Anjali loves her paramparas, you think it was easy for her to accept Lavanya as a live-in girlfriend of ASR? No, she just didn't want Arnav to leave her and would have done anything to make him stay.

Continued Need for Reassurance - How many times did she seek that from both Shaym and ASR?

Weakened Sense of Self Worth - We already know she thinks she is unworthy of Shaym as she has polio and was abandoned at the alter once.

And why should she not have fear of abandonment? Her parents left her. Her fiance left her. The only person she could count on unconditionally for years was Arnav. Later on, Shaym was added to that list but at the moment, it is ASR only.

Remember her reactions every time a family member almost walked out of RM.

Arnav: She accepted Lavanya and later on Khushi

Aakash,  Mami, Payal: whenever these people were almost out of RM's door, you could see the devastation on her face...she did not want to let them go..

After Shaym is gone, who is the only person in her life that she really fears losing? It is of course, our Arnav Singh Raizada.

She is seeing Arnav's actions as him pulling away from her thus feeding her fear of abandonment. Lemme explain why I say her actions in the last few episodes have been because of her fear of abandonment.

Flowers fiasco: "chotay, tum apni di ka dard bhool gayay" ... It wasn't jealousy because he was happily cutting a cake but because she thought he is drifting away from her and can no longer feel her pain.

Abortion drama: "hum akalay hein aur hamara bacha bhi akela rahay ga" combined with Khushi's flashback that she must think about her child. It was not only a selfish decision on her part. She thought she was making a good decision for her child as well. She fears being alone so much that she would rather abort her child than to let him live a lonely life in this world abandoned by everyone whose love he deserves.

Today: "Tum badal gayay ho...Tumhein Pyar ho gaya hai..Jab tumhari Shaadi hui na, tab hi say sub badal gaya hai..jab say tum nay hamaray sawaloon ka jawab dena choda hai, tab say sub padal gaya hai chotay"...

Now if that isn't a big hint for her fear of abandonment I don't know what is. Dig a little deeper into this dialogue...when are ours fears at their worst state? When we can see them coming true. We scream, we cry, we panic and lose our sleep over it. 

Isn't it true that Anjali and Arnav always used to close. Then he eloped. Could not tell her why he did so. Pehli baar Arnav nay us kay sawal ka jawab nahin diya tha. Ever since then, a lot of secrets regarding Arnav have been kept from her. The reason behind their marriage. ArHi always hide their issues from her and most of all, Shaym's truth. So many things Arnav has been hiding from her since he got married, whereas before that he used to share everything with her. She sees this distance and lack of communication between her and Arnav as leading towards him abandoning her.

Perhaps she saw their parents drift apart. She noticed Shaym paying lesser to attention to her. Why would she not think Arnav is going to same way by drifting apart from her. 

Now one could say, why she fears Arnav abandoning her where Khushi is concerned only. Who does she blame for Shaym not being a part of her life? On whose testimony did her brother throw out her husband? Who did she see cozying up to her husband? Khushi...It is natural she will atleast partially blame her for Shaym not being in her life. But Khushi is still in her chotay's life. What guarantee does Anjali have that Arnav would not drift away from her towards Khushi and leave her forever.

Yes, I know its hard to believe why Anjali would ever think such a thing. She has to know how much Arnav loves her and would sacrifice anything for her and she does know. But our insecurities, our fears have a tendency to mess up what our hearts know. These our our flaws and we all live them.

Today, she saw her chotay who never used to lie or hide things from her before he got married in what looked like his plan to stay back by lying to get cozy with the woman who played a part in separating her from her husband. Of course, she acted out and assumed the worst.

Note to CVs: If this is what you have been trying to have been failing miserably..buckle up by giving Anjali some monologues or a little obvious dialogues so your average viewer can understand what is going on through her head as not everyone has time to sit down and dissect Pujaali.

Edited by -Huma- - 20 July 2012 at 6:34pm

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Atyay Senior Member

Joined: 29 February 2012
Posts: 925

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 6:41pm | IP Logged
You make perfect sense. But its tragic to see it first hand on the screen.

There's too much "Horror & Thriller" (NK's words) in IPKKND.
'Na Unhe Chain Milti Hai Na Hume!!!' Angry

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sita1150 Senior Member

Joined: 17 February 2012
Posts: 363

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 6:43pm | IP Logged
maan-and-geet IF-Dazzler

Joined: 22 November 2007
Posts: 2736

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 6:53pm | IP Logged
you make perfect sense... AHHH i had those things in mind while I was defending her for last 2 weeks but today's episode just pushed me over the edge...
AHHH...Must keep in mind what Anjali is made off... thanks for the reminder Smile

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Rolzz IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 07 June 2010
Posts: 10942

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 6:58pm | IP Logged

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OmNaMaSteOm IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 09 April 2005
Posts: 21064

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 7:05pm | IP Logged
what ur saying makes perfect sense but the huge problem is thats not the way they are presenting it
the look on her face seeing roses was really different
infact the look on her face, her actions in the past 2 weeks is not matching ur explanation
i love the way u said ur bit, u gave all the things which she had problems with

we all need to blame the CV's for this
a common viewer would like to skip her scenes

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rainaM Goldie

Joined: 08 November 2011
Posts: 2152

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 7:13pm | IP Logged
* The crowd bursts into appplause*
ClapClap Nice observation you got there! & Anjali could very well be suffering from a fear of abandonment for all we know  but the thing is sweety, not everyone has a keen eye like yours, Not all the viewers of IPKKND have that much exposure to such disorders and the CVs should know that. They should know the kind of audience they are reaching out to. If they want us to feel sympathy for her, to actually like her, they should've defined her character in greater depth. They cant expect everyone to "google" what disorder the character is going through, right? They have to define it themselves and as of now they're not doing a very good job! 
Her wanting attention from Arnav makes perfect sense, I understand that but they way she looked at the roses as if she cant believe that her brother who's a HUSBAND as well would embellish his wife's path with roses, almost as if she wants it for herself. I found that a bit weird. 
Anyways other then that way to decode her, you did a great job :)

Edited by dmgloverforever - 20 July 2012 at 7:26pm

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N.fatima Groupbie

Joined: 25 April 2012
Posts: 110

Posted: 20 July 2012 at 7:27pm | IP Logged
Well said.  I have been saying the same thing in different posts (not as eloquently). But I agree this is where it seems to be going .

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