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Sher O Shayri

funny shayri & jokes (Page 109)

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:40pm | IP Logged
From a woman's point of view:
- The most perfect man in the world is her father.
- The most abused husband in the world is her brother.
- The most handsome man in the world is her son.
- The luckiest and happiest man in the world is her sister's husband.
- The most thankful man in the world is her son in law.
- And the worst, most selfish, heartless, total jerk and the man with worst behavior in the world is her husband LOL LOL LOL LOL ROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:42pm | IP Logged
Banta goes over to visit one of his friends.

While he is at her friend's house it starts to rain very heavily the type that is not going to stop.

His friend tells him to spend the night at his house and go home the next day.

When he hears this, he rushes out the door and comes a while later totally drenched and carrying a small bag.

So his friend asks, "Where did you run off too!"

Bant says, "I went home to get my pyjamas!" ROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:43pm | IP Logged
Dear Lord:
So far I've done all right.
I haven't gossipped,
haven't lost my temper,
haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or overindulgent. I'm really glad about that.

But in a few minutes, God,
I'm going to get out of bed.
And from then on, I'm going to need a lot more help. Ermm ROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:45pm | IP Logged
At a Bar, a NUN preaches: Drinking is Bad.

Man: Have you tried it?

Nun: No, Never.

Man: Ok, you try once, if you don't like it, I'll giv up Drinking.

Nun: Ok, but bring it in Teacup, I don't want people seeing me drinking.

Man goes to the bartender and says: Giv me two Shots of Rum in Tea-Cups.

Bartender- IS THAT NUN HERE Again? Geek ROFLROFLROFLROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:46pm | IP Logged
When her late husband's will was read, a widow learnt he had left the bulk of his fortune to another woman.

Enraged, she rushed to change the inscription on her spouse's tombstone.

"Sorry, lady," said the stone cutter. "I inscribed 'Rest in Peace' on your orders. I can't change it now."

"Very well," she said grimly. "Just add, 'Until We Meet Again'." ROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:46pm | IP Logged

A doctor enters into a patient's room and informs the patient that he has good news and bad news.

He then asks the patient which news he would like to hear.

The patient responds, "Doctor, give me the good news."

The doctor says, "Well we are gonna name a disease after you."

 ROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:48pm | IP Logged
A wife goes to the local market to buy some organic vegetables for her husbands. She came back rather upset.

When her husband asked her what was wrong, she said, "I don't think I like that produce guy. I went and looked around for organic vegetables and I couldn't find any. So I asked him, 'Where the organic Vegetables were?' He didn't know what I was talking about so I said, 'These vegetables are for my husbands. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?

And he said, 'No, ma'am. You'll have to do that yourself'." ROFL

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Posted: 06 October 2012 at 2:49pm | IP Logged
A taxi driver driving a Mercedes-Benz picked up a rather simple looking fellow at the airport one day.

When the gentleman got in and they started on their way he enquired what the three pinned emblem on the front is for.

The driver replied, "Why it's for lining it up at people so you can run them down".

"Ah I see", said the man.

With this the taxi driver starts heading straight for an elderly woman but at the last second swerves away and hears a loud bang, he looks curiously over at the passenger who is hanging out of the car with the door wide open: "I thought you were going to miss there for a minute!" ROFL

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