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Tainted (removed) (Page 132)

mirka88 IF-Dazzler

Joined: 03 July 2009
Posts: 2561

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 10:39am | IP Logged
This chapter was so're right.. when you're telling this kind of story, no one wants to interrupt. 

I can only imagine Manorama's anguish in the last part..when the nurse wishes that Aakash be like his father. 

GoldenEyes Goldie

Joined: 21 February 2012
Posts: 1126

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 10:40am | IP Logged
awesome! thanks for pm 
lankan Senior Member

Joined: 07 May 2006
Posts: 892

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 11:07am | IP Logged
Amazing ! The story of Mano and Mahi is truly very touching. The last part almost bought tears to my eyes. Great job ! 
meera06 Goldie

Joined: 12 July 2011
Posts: 2240

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 11:10am | IP Logged
Awesome update!
You have brilliantly written Manorama's story..
So Gauri was protected and also her first born..wonder who is her first born...
Now I understand Akash's reason of killing Payal's children..His fate was already written even before he was born...
Kalyaani IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 15 March 2012
Posts: 21397

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 11:25am | IP Logged
Originally posted by vgedin


Wow! I have told you before, that your writing has this almost clinical precision to it - you're economic with words - not one word more, not one word less. You managed, in a single chapter - to convey almost everything significant about Manorama's life AND Akash's birth. And that is spectacular. Akash really didn't have a choice, did he ? Doomed right from his birth - "You're going to grow up to be just like your daddy."

The carefully constructed shields built over the past sixteen years were crumbling.

London Bridge is falling down.
Falling down.
Falling down.

London Bridge is falling down.

Brilliant, I say. But you've turned a Nursery Rhyme into a sounding like a death knell! 

You must be loyal to the Group.

She tilted her head to the side and waited for him to ask.

You must be loyal to your Family.

So, so beautiful...

You must be loyal to me!

"Will you marry me?"

Ouch! Mahinder is one of those men - completely in love; their lover is indispensable to them, self-sacrificing be damned. And Manorama - "that most dangerous combination of both astonishingly intelligent and devastatingly poor". Precision - this is it. Her silences speak volumes - they are more sensuous than her words. This chapter was dark, like the others in Tainted. But tell you what ? This was also incredibly sexy

Splendid, as usual. Now I'm off to see all the pretty pictures on the blog. I want to see Mano's dress! 

PS - Oh, and who is Gauri's first born ?

May I simply say, ditto...

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:


sweet_5 Goldie

Joined: 16 April 2007
Posts: 1302

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 11:39am | IP Logged
Awesome chapter! I thougt for a second that this would be arnav's mom

I would love to read more! Count me in
Shalve IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 06 September 2010
Posts: 12618

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 11:41am | IP Logged
awesome update
serialmaniac IF-Dazzler

Joined: 17 April 2010
Posts: 2663

Posted: 17 November 2012 at 12:00pm | IP Logged
Ohk so aakash was born to protect gauri's firstborn matlab arnav right????
N the whole chp focussed on manorma's point of veiw which was great!!!  however please clarify soon how each character fits into the story. If my guest above isnt correct then what is mahindra and mono"s story??

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