"I've chosen my life ' now I want to start living it."
As I could not write yesterday.. I will be combining both...
Do we have any doubts about whats happening.. I think not..
Arnav Singh Raizada has accepted that he LOVES this woman.. and he will do ANYTHING to make her his.. He will go to any distance to keep her in his life..He had told himself and promised..
" sorry mujhe yeh sab kehna pada khushi, par tumhe main kaise jaane de sakta hoon.. and now sirf tumhe jaane se hi nahi rokoonga, but iss contract ke poora hone se pehle main tumhe waapis pa loonga.. I will win you back aur apni zindagi ka hissa banaoonga hamesha hamesha ke liye!"
In short he has come to the realisation that Khushi is his life and now he does not want to waste a single moment of their glorious time together.. He is eager to embark on this mysterious journey of life with her...
And in his quest to make her his.. He has declared a war.. A war against her indifference.. A war against her sadness.. A war against her resolve to ignore his efforts..
He had his eureka moment while remembering the past...and he decided to recreate old memories for her.. Trying to make her realise what they felt in those moments..
The 2 moments he chose.. the 2 memories that were
1. when she hid in his closet: this happened right after he believed that she had gone forever to Lucknow, leaving him in peace.. But the thought that she had left and he would never be able to see her again.. had troubled him to no end...
When he saw her there sitting in the closet.. he was angry.. but there was a sense of relief that she was there in front of him.. She had not left him..
It was this feeling of relief that stood out to him in that moment and wanted her to feel.. The pleasure of finding the other person..
GOD! the look Sanaya gives once he jumps out of the closet.. Priceless..
2. When she threw tea at him: He was amused and angry at her antics that day.. A paagal pan in his Khushi which he has come to adore.. An impulsive quick to react Khushi..
He threw coffee (which suspiciously looked like water ) at her face... Startling her..
The rage on her face... She looked sooo mad...
And well she was able to reignite the famous ASR anger and the passion that goes with it.. Once again making him stamp his authority..
When ASR says "theek hai to ab manwa lete hain" AMAZING!! The smirk.. Just too good... Its the smirk we can swoon over whole day and night...
Trying to recreate the old moments he stumbled on to something which would ultimately lead to his victory..
He realised that to win her back.. he will need to force his authority, challenge her, goad her.. Because Khushi Kumari Gupta Singh Raizada can do anything.. but she cannot and will not back down from an open challenge...
They made a deal.. That she will come running into his arms.. and if she does so, then she will accept him as her husband.. The minute he challenged, we knew who was going to win.. Cos as Arnav said earlier to Khushi " Mere bina to jaise tumhaari koi baat hi nahi banti" How can Khushi not be with Arnav.. They are 2 bodies 1 soul after all..
Arnav Singh Raizada always does what he says.. Today was no different.. He played dirty and scared Khushi to her bones.. and the poor soul was left with no option but to run directly into his arms when she sees him standing in the middle of the hall calling her name... hugging him tightly.. holding on to her dear life.. And this time he did not waste a nano second to hug her back.. Complete Acceptance from both of them.. He held her close, rubbing her hair, trying to silence her fears..
When she realises that he has done this on purpose.. Her anger towering, she lets it out.. hitting him in the chest.. he bears her anger with a grin on his face..
Now that she has lost the deal.. He with all his right as a husband.. pulls her into his arms.. Breaking all her barriers down.. She desperately tries to hold on to the last shreds of her anger, but gives up and embraces him with her full heart...
He reminds her that she has lost.. and moves forward to seal the deal with the kiss... but reality intervenes.. in the form of RM Waasis...
An embarrassed Khushi tries to clean the rose petals... but Arnav tells her to relax.. Of course.. now that they have accepted each other with their hearts.. what was the point of hiding from anyone?? What was the need to feel ashamed.. and after all she is his legally wedded wife..
What a turnaround.. First they had to act lovey dovey to convince people that they are a happy married couple.. and now they have to hide their feelings from others, lest they should offend anyone..
The whole scenario conveyed one thing to me as a viewer.. They have finally accepted each other as husband and wife not only to themselves but also to each other.. Today they have voiced their feelings.. Arnav being there when Khushi was running around scared put across beautifully that he will be her shelter in every storm that threatens to engulf her.. He will be by her side, comforting her, holding her hand, guiding her all the way to safety..
Arnav and Anjali
A brother-sister relation so sweet that it wanted the sisters to do so much for their brother.. I for one thought.. Its such a beautiful bond which they share.. And wanted to have something similar with my brother..
A brother who always did everything possible for his sister's happiness.. Who never wanted to give her any pain.. Never wanted to see tears in her eyes..
He is feeling the pain and agony of being distanced by the very sister.. Anjali on seeing Arnav and Khushi in throes of passion, with rose petals cushioning their path asks Chhote hadn't he told her he was going for a meeting to Agra?? He tries to answer and approach her but is shrugged off with Anjali walking off to her room..Leaving a confused Arnav behind who is unable to understand this behaviour of his di..
Arnav once again is left in the middle.. But as I always believed, Anjali's well being will always be his first priority.. He goes to her room.. trying to reason with her.. Trying to tell her the truth but she again sends him out of her room, asking him to leave her alone... Still not able to understand the reason of her displeasure... Wondering why was she so angry that he did not make it to the satsang...
She tells him that he should not have lied to her about the meeting in Agra.. If he wanted to spend time with Khushi he should have said so.. At least he should have told her the truth.. Now she understands what the reality is... (God only can save Arnav now)
Akash and mami tell Arnav that she has still not taken the medicine.. Leaving Arnav worried..
Arnav goes back to Anjali's room.. telling her to listen to him.. and giving her his swear.. when she still refuses asking her.. is she no longer worried about him.. Does she not wish for his life.. She stops him and takes the medicine.. She requests him not to say such things again.. He requests her that she also should not think that he will ever lie to her.. Anjali remains unconvinced and tells him..
"Times have changed.. You have changed.. you have fallen in love..Since the day you got married, everything has changed.. Everything has changed since the day you stopped answering my questions.."
I was very upset with her dialogues initially.. but on further thinking about them.. I realised what she said was correct only..
Times have changed...Where there was only love and trust in the family members on the surface.. The actual depths of the relations are becoming visible..
Where once Akash commented on his sangeet that di and jijaji are the best couple to a sombre payal who was aware of the truth of Shyam.. the same jija ji turned out to be a cheater..
Where once Akash could do anything for Payal.. He cannot stand the sight of her..
Where Arnav and Anjali were always close to each.. Distances are growing between them..
Where Arnav and Khushi could not stand each other.. Now they cannot stay away from each other..
The only thing that is constant is Mami and Nani.. Mami's hatred for Gupta sisters.. and Nani's faith in Gupta sisters..
You have changed..You have fallen in love.. A closure of a loop for me.. Once she said those words in context to lavanya.. Then also he was shocked how could she know that he has fallen in love with Khushi.. But today both of them are aware that Arnav has fallen in love with Khushi.. It is a fact that she knew but was never really accepted.. cos never in the past had she really seen him showing her love in an obvious way.. She assumed Arnav and Khushi were in love.. but his ASR persona never changed.. never left him..
Now she sees a different chhote who is not chhote at all.. He is somebody's husband.. A person whose wife is also important to him.. And because of his wife, he did something, she never would have thought he was capable of.. Broke her marriage.. destroyed her happiness.. Still failing to comprehend her own worth in bothe Arnav and Khushi's life...
Since the day you got married, everything has changed... When Arnav married Khushi.. he made it impossible for Shyam to hurt Khushi.. and stopped Shyam's efforts of trying to kill Anjali.. And he began on the most important journey of his life.. The journey to Khushi's truth, innocence and the journey of his love... In that journey he became aware of the horrid truth behind Shyam Manohar Jha and was left with no other option but to throw him out of the house..
Everything changed, once you stopped answering my questions.. After his marriage, Arnav failed to tell Anjali the true reason behind his hasty marriage.. The reason that it was only for her sake that he took such a step.. For the first time making her lose faith in khushi and him.. Till date he is silent about the truth.. He has told her the reason he did it for her sake.. But he has not explained the reason behind this action of throwing Shyam out of the house..What made him trust Khushi over Shyam?? After all Shyam was in their lives' longer than Khushi...
Had the truth come out earlier. would she have believed him.. No.. But at that time, she would also not have thought that he threw Shyam out for Khushi's sake..
Akash and Payal
Payal has been tolerating everything Akash is saying silently for she is aware that her inability to tell him the truth has hurt him a lot..
She scolds Khushi in front of him making him realise that she is not only Khushi's sister but she is trying hard to fulfill her role as DIL and his wife too..
She interrupted Khushi after she let out one important thing but before she could make another blunder.. when she uttered the word amma.. Had she completed her sentence that amma stopped them from telling the truth lest the marriage should break once again.. it would have reinforced the doubt which Shyam tried to creat in Akash's mind.. But her words that Payal did want to tell the truth but was stopped by other factors.. made him realise that she did not want to break their promise..
Further when Nani said..that if Khushi and Payal kept quiet it was only to keep the family together.. and everyone understands that..Akash listens to nani intently.. Some cobwebs clearing.. But once your trust is broken, it is not so easy to form it again..
Finally Payal found her 2 feet to stand on today.. She took a stand.. trying to clear the air between them.. asking him why was he behaving like this.. She is only trying to take care of him.. Even if she cannot do anything for di.. at least she can take care of him.. Support him.. be with him.. Saying everything a loving and caring wife would say...
But interrupted by mami once again..
I would like to dedicate this part of my post entirely to Anjali Manohar Jha..
Lets forget for a moment that the woman I am writing about is Anjali.. Arnav's sister.. Khushi's sister in law..
Lets just assume.. She is just a WOMAN... Any woman... Now lets talk about that woman...
1. Belongs to a good family
2. The family dotes on her
3. Brother who would do anything for her
4. Husband she believed loved her
5. A child in her womb.. a symbol of love
1. Childhood physical disability
2. Mother committed suicide.. Dad mostly dead.. Reasons unknown..
3. First Marriage broken on the day of marriage..
4. Thrown out of their home by chacha
5. A brother who loves her more than anything but fails to share anything with her.. she has to force or blackmail him to do almost everything
Result: abandonment issues.. That people leave.. Mother did not consider kids worthy enough and left them alone in the world to fend for themselves.. She was never able to share her misery with her brother who went through the same thing as her.. She internalised the pain.. and made herself believe that she had forgotten the past..
She found a husband who made her his Rani Sahiba..Gave her everything she wanted and dreamed of.. Looked after her every smallest desire.. Never gave her a reason to be angry.. Gave her plenty of reasons to be suspicious though overlooked because of the rose tinted glasses.. A husband who made her believe that he was only good.. Had no faults.. who listened to her every complaint patiently.. Who supported her.. who made her dependent on himself...
Family, brother, husband never wanted her to face any adversity.. Kept telling her the world is as sweet and kind as they show her.. She was safe in her sanctuary.. She never had a moment of worry..
1. A family where everyone dotes on her
2. A child in her womb.. something to look forward to...
3. A brother and sister in law always ready to support her.. Both have only one wish.. That she should be happy...
1. Husband is a cheater
2. Husband kidnapped and tried to kill her brother
3. Husband thrown out of the house
4. Husband cheated on her with brother's wife who is an inseparable part of brother's life..
5. Brother for whom she was the Sun of whose universe is no longer completely focused on her
6. a child in her womb.. a reminder of its father.. a child who will never let her forget about its father..
Result: Her whole universe crumbled overnight.. A person whom she trusted completely was accused of such horrendous acts.. A person who was her life.. reason of existence was thrown out of the house solely on the basis of accusations,, without a shred of proof...
The day Shyam was asked to leave the RM, her faith in
everything broke.. She went into a state of shock.. She was unable to grasp the
situation.. and she lost the grasp on reality..
She suffered in her misery alone.. She banished her brother from entering her sanctuary.. The family which doted
on her.. left her alone thinking that its best to let her come to terms with
the truth.. But the family did not reinforce the truth..
The brother never came clean about the facts of the
situation.. Only told that he had to do this for her and her baby.. but not the real reason.. he thought he was
once again protecting her from the ugly truth.. but did he??
Can any woman who was in a devoted relationship for 4
years believe the accusations against
her husband just because somebody said so.. If a woman does, then doesn't it
mean that she had no faith in the relation to begin with..
All Anjali knows and understands is that HER CHHOTE
kicked out HER SHYAM JI because of KHUSHI JI.. She is no SAINT.. Can you
imagine what might be going through her mind?? Why did she ever bring Khushi
into RM? Why did she not listen to chhote and kick her out?? She was happy till
she saw the sparks fly between Arnav and Khushi but now that it has threatened
her existence, not happy at all.. only thing she is blaming is why did chhote
marry Khushi??? Why? She finds herself the culprit for keeping Khushi coming
back to their lives.. and therefore she is now blaming chhote for it.. for it was he who fell in
love with her and married her bringing her in their house and gave 24x7 close proximity
to Shyam and Khushi' If he had not married her, the truth of Shyam's engagement to Khushi would
probably have stayed buried FOREVER..
She is mourning for the death of her relation.. A
person in mourning can be depressed or can just have symptoms of depression.. I
would say Anjali as of now is suffering from psychotic depression.. Her entire demeanor.. ready to fall at the drop of the hat look.. That is why
she is having the irrational thoughts that Chhote no longer cares about her'What she needs is a little reassurance from his side that no matter what he
will always be by her side.. Remember when Arnav said di aap mujhe kabhi ma ki
tarah chod ke mat chale jaana' Do u think it's the fear only Arnav has.. The
fear of abandonment is deep rooted in Anjali too' She never expressed it for
she was sure that her brother and husband would never leave her side.. But now
with one gone.. her very foundations have shaken and who is to say that her
brother cannot leave her too?? That is why every time she sees Khushi and Arnav together sharing private moments she goes to her hell that Chhote might forget about her..
We might feel that Anjali is being selfish..self centered.. But does she have a control over her feelings?? She always wished happiness for her brother.. Do you think she wants to sabotage that happiness? She doesn't.. but right now her insecurities have heightened many folds.. for that reason we are seeing a clinging Anjali.. Please do remember she is the same sister who willingly and whole heartedly gave Khushi the charge of Arnav's medicine.. She was the one who wanted to cheer Khushi up when she was missing Arnav.. She was the one who arranged for Khushi's ticket to London, so that they could be together.. She was also the one who recorded the Holi fest and wanted to reasure the memory of her chhote being happy..
When faced with such mental shocks people can come across as mean and selfish.. but its not something they can help.. or have control over..
Points to ponder:
1. The medicine they kept asking Anji to take can be symolosed to the bitter truth.. which she is refusing to swallow at the moment.. When time comes Arnav will make sure that she sees the whole truth and swallow it.. and he will do whatever is necessary for her to be aware of the truth..
2. Arnav's shocked expression after listening to Anjali.. Poor boy.. He could not imagine that his di had a problem with his marrying.. after all she was the one who said that it was the best diwali present that he could give her when he agreed to marry Lavanya..
He has realised how deep the scars have been made because he chose to hide the truth..
3. How long will Payal tolerate this behaviour? Will she tell Akash enough? If you have so much problem in looking at my face and you keep rejecting everything that I am trying to do for no fault of mine.. Than you be happy with your mom.. Main chali..
4. Nani is trying really hard to keep peace at home.. but will mami's constant jibes at Gupta sisters result in her telling her the truth?
well.. I think Have written too much already..
Have a great weekend guys..