Na Bole Tum Na Maine Kuch Kaha Season 2
Na Bole Tum Na Maine Kuch Kaha Season 2

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*~* NBTNMKK Episode Discussion Thread *~* (Page 5)

swavai2 Goldie
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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 7:57am | IP Logged
This is my POV on legality of MR wedding. I don't call it a marriage, it was a wedding. Please feel free to express your POV after reading the post.

Hi dear all,

Many girls and boys are upset with the fact that abruptly happened MR Wedding has been called off equally abruptly, as Rids has returned the Mangalsootra to Mohan. People are angry for NBT team to have made a mockery of the phenomenon of marriage, an institution which is considered sacred by most of us living today.

Marriage is an institution which is perhaps the base of family - a basic system which allows the human beings to grow, an opportunity to being nurtured and loved, a space to experience the joy of togetherness, acceptance and care - a space for giving love to others as well. Therefore, I am with you all about the sentiments, thoughts and significance of marriage as an institution.

Though in today's Indian society we do see many incidents which have reduced marriage as either a money - wealth sharing mechanism or a legally & socially sanctioned way for a man and a woman to enjoy, offer or force sex on each other.

But dear all, I disagree with you if you think that by showing a fast track, middle of the night MR wedding and then Riddhima opting out of it, to free Mohan from this wedding, which would become a pain for Mohan, Riddhima and Megha, that NBT has made a mockery of the institution of marriage.

I don't think so. Please spare some more time to read this post. Sorry but its going to be a long one.

One Reason for Mohan - Riddhima wedding to be not really legal:

As per the hindu marriage act a wedding between two hindu persons shall be legally considered as marriage if the couple performs saptapadi , i.e., 7 fere + brides parents give her away in the kanyadaan in a ceremonial manner. Without both the rituals being performed on the same day, under the guidance of the same priest, the wedding shall not be considered to be legal.

Though there are weddings which take place following  Vedik Rituals only and they skip Homa - Havan as well as kanyadan. In MR wedding they did show Homa -Havan but no knyadaan. In the MR wedding they showed 7 fere, sindoor and mangalsootra but no kanyadaan. They showed Riddhima's mother tying a knot but that is only bandhan but before that she ideally should have given the daughter away. So, they have not performed the wedding properly, as per both the methods.

Earlier they used to say that only a married couple can perform kanyadaan or a man alone can do so but a woman alone can not perform kanyadaan. But now there are incidents where single mothers perform kanyadan for their daughters. But Rid's mother is not shown to have offered her daughter in Kanyadaan. Please remember CV's are giving us broad signals by showing Saroj talking about Kanyadaan, so far twice. :-)

I am no way an expert on religious maters, rather a critic, someone who raises doubt and argues over logical loopwholes in those maters. May be because of that I could see these issues. ;-)

Please note sindoor and mangalsootra are symbols used to communicate a woman's married status, after she is married. These are lifestyle related symbols which many women use and there are many who don't.

There are many communities and castes and geographic areas in which hindu married women don't were sindur at all, neither husband putting sindur is a part of the wedding ritual. E.g., in Maharashtra I know this for sure. I belong to that state and in our traditional marriage rituals there is no Sindur but Mangalsutra is important.

Such a diversity of customs goes with Mangalsootra as well. Many communities have different type of Mangalsootra. E.g., the kind of mangalsootra mohan has purchased and Rid is wearing is a symbol of a married woman in Maharashtra, Gujarat and probably Madya Pradesh. Since the show is based in Indoor that kind of mangalsootra is used and the word Mangalsootra is said. But come down to south in kerala, women use Thali, it is not called mangalsootra and it does look very different as it has no black beeds at all.

In Punjab or further north they use Nathani or nose ring or in kashmir they have a very long ear ring as a symbol of married woman's lifestyle.

Due to this diversity of customs the hindu marriage act insists on 7 fere and Kanyadaan. As per the hindu tradition marriage is approved only if these two rituals are performed in the same wedding mandap under the guidance of same priest.

Another big problem with the legality of this wedding:

Apart from the preist there got to be 2 witnesses from the bride as well as the groom. They only showed Rid's mom.

MR wedding took place but as per the current marriage registration system, such a wedding becomes legal only when it is registered in the govt office. They got married in temple, so they will have to go to the marriage registerates office in Indoor along with the priest and two witnesses and photgraphs of kanyadan and feres. Yes, if there is a quick wedding like MR, the marriage registerate officer may even insist on photos as there is no wedding invitation card. And we know this, the couple never went for registration, instead Riddhima returned her Mangalsootra.

Do you think Indu will seriousely like Mohan wedding with Riddhima, after knowing that Megha loves Mohan and they are getting married? I think she loves her son enough to understand with whom lies his happiness and that he accepting to wed with Riddhima was out of frustration. I seriously want Indu and Megha to stand by Mohan as and when this mess comes out in the open. I want Indu to throw all her ranting on Riddhima's parent for emotionally blackmailing him and not bothering to inform / invite her.

If at the time of registration any one takes objection - which Megha and even Indu can, the registration will not take place. IMay be Guru can chip in who has probably heard MR conversation where Riddhima returned her the Mangalsootra and freed Mohan and asked him to go ahead and marry Megha.  Due to these people's objections, no registration would take place, thence, here will be no marriage to take divorce from. Big smile

So guys chiil. CVs and the PH can not take that kind of punga yaar.

I had written this post on the phone on last Saturday or Sundy but was too unsure of posting. Everyone that day was in a different mood and I was too much occupied with work I got home to complete. Thinking that this post would generate discussion, I postponed it, for, after posting I had very little time to follow through the discussion / different POV's.

But today, as we all are in a mood to celebrate this beautiful couple's Sangeet Ceremony on the screen, I am dareing to post this. I hope it does not hert anyones sentiments.

@ Fivir, is this post too long for this thread? Can we post such long write ups on this discussion thread? I hope it is okay and I am not breaking any rules.


Thanks All for reading this long post.



Edited by swavai2 - 20 July 2012 at 8:06am

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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 8:32am | IP Logged

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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 8:45am | IP Logged

 Thanks Swati for PM , 

  There were many Flaws in MR wedding . I really think there are few things which we are still not told about . I even think Ridz Mom has told Mohan somethings which CV has yet not said to us . Ridz looks like a obsessed girl . 

 


Edited by manesha76 - 20 July 2012 at 8:55am

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kkkap00r Goldie
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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 8:46am | IP Logged
Thanks Swati for the PM.
 
I believe there was an instance when Pandit did say kanyadaan ho gaya. Not sure though.
 
Second thing...registration. Now what if Megha and Mohan's marriage is not registered? Then, it can be challenged legally as well if MR marriage can be challenged.
 
All in all, I want to see MM together. And this going to happen for sure.
 
The only unwanted track is Ridz coming back to haunt MM...or rather Mohan. But let it be so. I am going to chill and will enjoy tonight's sangeet ceremony where Megha is going to look beautiful and Mohan will be looking dashing hunk!!!
 
Mohan never wanted to marry anyone except Megha and if he has been made to do it, then its not his fault!!! Big smile
 
So, its cool. I myself felt pretty much bad but now since the time I saw MM convo at Mohan's balcony, I have forgotten Ridz!!!! If she comes back again (which is confirmed she will) I would say ... BRING IT ON...
 
Megha will remain besides Mohan and Mohan will be with Megha ...always!!!!
 
Enjoy!!! :)


Edited by kkkap00r - 20 July 2012 at 9:20am

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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 9:14am | IP Logged
I don't want to be negative..i'm also finding suitable reasons to get rid of this mess..but there are some questions i will want to know-

Now on the legal points and Hindu traditional Marriage-I'm not expert in Marriage tradition but there r boys-girls do bhaagke Shaadi,there goes no "Kanyadaan"-but it's after- all considered Marriage...
Now the legal point-Recently Court has passed a Verdict making mandatory of registering Marriage but each states hasn't implemented it as much i know..(Dunno about MP)..
Setting aside legal ponts,if Rids emotionally blackmails,will Mohan and Megha can ignore it?Or we will like to see them selfish? If she isn't turning Vamp,den wat was the need of dis Track?May b related to TRP,but will watch how dey use Riddima in future and how CV's get the situation out of dis mess..
As of now,i will njoy every happy moments of MM but wil b super-happy if the solution comes in a suitable way...
Thnx Swati fr the PM n really got hope n knowledge frm ur points,wil like to know further about the point..

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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 10:35am | IP Logged
Swati, thanks for the PM.

Now I am no expert in Hindu marriage act but aren't Ridz's mom and the preist witnesses to the wedding that happened? We all saw the saat phere taking place and Mohan tying the mangalsutra around Riddhima's neck. Now law says that marriages have to be registered for them to be considered "legal". Even if MR don't register their marriage, can it change the fact that Mohan in his full senses married Riddhima in traditional Hindu custom? Yes, based on legalities we can say MR marriage might or might not be valid. But as per Hindu rituals and customs they are in fact husband and wife. 

I do know that while registering your marriage you need your wedding invitation, wedding pictures, the register of the place where the wedding was held and of course two witnesses. The only thing Ridz has to prove her wedding actually happened are her mother & priest(witnesses). 

Now coming to the show I don't think they will go into the legal formalities as much. They'll just play the track on moral  and traditional grounds. I can almost foresee Mohan being made to feel bad about ditching Riddhima right after marrying her. This is a sure shot way to ensure TRP's which in turn is the reason behind this track being introduced.

Many of us have thought of another angle to this. Several of us feel that Riddhima is mentally unstable and has a history of self abuse. Yesterday when she held the knife to her wrist and said "aap jaante ho mere liye yeh karna kitna aasan hain". It was kind of an indication that she has inflicted injuries upon herself before as well. I have a weird feeling that this possibly could be the angle CV's will look to take.


Edited by NeelimaSJ - 20 July 2012 at 11:44am

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poojabi Senior Member
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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 1:35pm | IP Logged
has anyone noticed guru aaj full  dress up hoke ayaClap

but they have applied so much loud lipstick to megha,jiji,MIL every one was smiling dar dar ke ki kharab na ho jaye.
and megha was looking artificial,i didnt like her costume.she looks best without loud make up,she is natural beauty ,usse ye sab ki jarurat nehi,ye sab ridhima jaise items ke lye hai,inko samajh kyun nehi ata.uparse kunal ke hairs cut dye.hate colors.sara maza kirikira kardya.
finally show stopper moment MN hug.Smile
uske age maine dekha nehi.


can anyone tell me how ridhima got to know about mohan's sangeet??who informed her about the date and venue??


Edited by poojabi - 20 July 2012 at 1:52pm

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Posted: 20 July 2012 at 2:34pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by swavai2

This is my POV on legality of MR wedding. I don't call it a marriage, it was a wedding. Please feel free to express your POV after reading the post.

Hi dear all,

Many girls and boys are upset with the fact that abruptly happened MR Wedding has been called off equally abruptly, as Rids has returned the Mangalsootra to Mohan. People are angry for NBT team to have made a mockery of the phenomenon of marriage, an institution which is considered sacred by most of us living today.

Marriage is an institution which is perhaps the base of family - a basic system which allows the human beings to grow, an opportunity to being nurtured and loved, a space to experience the joy of togetherness, acceptance and care - a space for giving love to others as well. Therefore, I am with you all about the sentiments, thoughts and significance of marriage as an institution.

Though in today's Indian society we do see many incidents which have reduced marriage as either a money - wealth sharing mechanism or a legally & socially sanctioned way for a man and a woman to enjoy, offer or force sex on each other.

But dear all, I disagree with you if you think that by showing a fast track, middle of the night MR wedding and then Riddhima opting out of it, to free Mohan from this wedding, which would become a pain for Mohan, Riddhima and Megha, that NBT has made a mockery of the institution of marriage.

I don't think so. Please spare some more time to read this post. Sorry but its going to be a long one.

One Reason for Mohan - Riddhima wedding to be not really legal:

As per the hindu marriage act a wedding between two hindu persons shall be legally considered as marriage if the couple performs saptapadi , i.e., 7 fere + brides parents give her away in the kanyadaan in a ceremonial manner. Without both the rituals being performed on the same day, under the guidance of the same priest, the wedding shall not be considered to be legal.

Though there are weddings which take place following  Vedik Rituals only and they skip Homa - Havan as well as kanyadan. In MR wedding they did show Homa -Havan but no knyadaan. In the MR wedding they showed 7 fere, sindoor and mangalsootra but no kanyadaan. They showed Riddhima's mother tying a knot but that is only bandhan but before that she ideally should have given the daughter away. So, they have not performed the wedding properly, as per both the methods.

Earlier they used to say that only a married couple can perform kanyadaan or a man alone can do so but a woman alone can not perform kanyadaan. But now there are incidents where single mothers perform kanyadan for their daughters. But Rid's mother is not shown to have offered her daughter in Kanyadaan. Please remember CV's are giving us broad signals by showing Saroj talking about Kanyadaan, so far twice. :-)

I am no way an expert on religious maters, rather a critic, someone who raises doubt and argues over logical loopwholes in those maters. May be because of that I could see these issues. ;-)

Please note sindoor and mangalsootra are symbols used to communicate a woman's married status, after she is married. These are lifestyle related symbols which many women use and there are many who don't.

There are many communities and castes and geographic areas in which hindu married women don't were sindur at all, neither husband putting sindur is a part of the wedding ritual. E.g., in Maharashtra I know this for sure. I belong to that state and in our traditional marriage rituals there is no Sindur but Mangalsutra is important.

Such a diversity of customs goes with Mangalsootra as well. Many communities have different type of Mangalsootra. E.g., the kind of mangalsootra mohan has purchased and Rid is wearing is a symbol of a married woman in Maharashtra, Gujarat and probably Madya Pradesh. Since the show is based in Indoor that kind of mangalsootra is used and the word Mangalsootra is said. But come down to south in kerala, women use Thali, it is not called mangalsootra and it does look very different as it has no black beeds at all.

In Punjab or further north they use Nathani or nose ring or in kashmir they have a very long ear ring as a symbol of married woman's lifestyle.

Due to this diversity of customs the hindu marriage act insists on 7 fere and Kanyadaan. As per the hindu tradition marriage is approved only if these two rituals are performed in the same wedding mandap under the guidance of same priest.

Another big problem with the legality of this wedding:

Apart from the preist there got to be 2 witnesses from the bride as well as the groom. They only showed Rid's mom.

MR wedding took place but as per the current marriage registration system, such a wedding becomes legal only when it is registered in the govt office. They got married in temple, so they will have to go to the marriage registerates office in Indoor along with the priest and two witnesses and photgraphs of kanyadan and feres. Yes, if there is a quick wedding like MR, the marriage registerate officer may even insist on photos as there is no wedding invitation card. And we know this, the couple never went for registration, instead Riddhima returned her Mangalsootra.

Do you think Indu will seriousely like Mohan wedding with Riddhima, after knowing that Megha loves Mohan and they are getting married? I think she loves her son enough to understand with whom lies his happiness and that he accepting to wed with Riddhima was out of frustration. I seriously want Indu and Megha to stand by Mohan as and when this mess comes out in the open. I want Indu to throw all her ranting on Riddhima's parent for emotionally blackmailing him and not bothering to inform / invite her.

If at the time of registration any one takes objection - which Megha and even Indu can, the registration will not take place. IMay be Guru can chip in who has probably heard MR conversation where Riddhima returned her the Mangalsootra and freed Mohan and asked him to go ahead and marry Megha.  Due to these people's objections, no registration would take place, thence, here will be no marriage to take divorce from. Big smile

So guys chiil. CVs and the PH can not take that kind of punga yaar.

I had written this post on the phone on last Saturday or Sundy but was too unsure of posting. Everyone that day was in a different mood and I was too much occupied with work I got home to complete. Thinking that this post would generate discussion, I postponed it, for, after posting I had very little time to follow through the discussion / different POV's.

But today, as we all are in a mood to celebrate this beautiful couple's Sangeet Ceremony on the screen, I am dareing to post this. I hope it does not hert anyones sentiments.

@ Fivir, is this post too long for this thread? Can we post such long write ups on this discussion thread? I hope it is okay and I am not breaking any rules.


Thanks All for reading this long post.



as much as i want to support all u said because even i dont want to believe the wedding is legal...but i hv to point out some things...

1. ridzie's mom was shown doing kanyadaan...see this pic...



and after this the pundit said "kanyadaan ho gaya"...so u see kanyadan hapnd...and a mother alone can do kanyadan...my own widowed aunt did that with her daughter...

as for sindoor and mangalsutra...although these r not norms for all hindu marriages (i being a bengali know that for bengali marriage there is no role of MS but sindoor is imp)...but still these two indicate a vaild hindu marriage...

as for 2 witnesses from each side...i know that is required for registry marriage but i dont know how many witnesses r required for ritual marriages...i dont think any is necessary since fire is considered as the witness...
but yes for registry marriage 2 from each side is reqd...but a ritual wedding which is not registered is also a valid marriage in hindu marriage act and needs a legal divorce for nullification...
a practicing advocate said "If the marriage was solomnized as per rites and rituals then, even if it was not registered it is a valid marriage in the eye of law and if one wants divorce, one has to approach the court of law. Remarriage without taking divorce is illegal and the second marriage is no marriage in the eyes of law also the person may be prosecuted for bigamy. So, it is very necessary to first legally dissolve the marriage and then think of remarriage".

http://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/Divorce-for-an-Unregistered-Marriage-23638.asp#.UAnDqFuJRhh


as for indu...i dont trust her at all...wen she saw mohan suicidal the prev day she still insisted that megha doesnt love him although she knows that megha is refusing him because she told megha to do so...so i dont think she has or will hv any sympathy for her son...i think she will want mohan to accept riddhima...



Edited by adoremevirgo - 20 July 2012 at 2:47pm

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