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FF: Heart's Owner Chap 9 updated (pg23) (Page 26)

kakacool123 Senior Member
kakacool123
kakacool123

Joined: 17 December 2011
Posts: 555

Posted: 29 August 2012 at 9:55am | IP Logged
Originally posted by wendy25

update lost heritage first please


Definitely, I promised readers a chapter for that one and i kind of forgot but i shall update that first Wink

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

-SilverAngel-

chitra_rao IF-Rockerz
chitra_rao
chitra_rao

Joined: 06 June 2009
Posts: 7542

Posted: 29 August 2012 at 2:53pm | IP Logged
Hey Ash, I'm back with comment cum analysis on ur update, I know I'm super late but you know my late latifagiri  . well I have no word to say how much I loved the update. It was fabulous, splendid with the perfect blend of manveer and also the tadkedar suspense twist. 

Analysis:

Part1:Rashi introduced, my minds confusion ball rolling :  well the name itself got me confused thought it was she, but it is he. Well it looks like he is gonna be reappearing in some of ur future updates also, he would play a substantial role in solving the mystery. I really welcomed this character wholeheartedly, seems to be very genuine and meticulous. Waiting to see his character unfold. One question, Udayveer is from Jayghar royal family u had mentioned teh Devghra royals also in ur first para, wondering why and how?

Part 2:M sets on the journey to re-discover herself: A question is raised on her capability to become a queen, and the way she answers to Unnati is just mind-blowing. Yes even ur leader is human, they can breakdown as well, they r leaders or royals because they know how to get back up again. Again very well penned ash

Part 3:Unnjay growing relationship alarming M: Again very well written ash, Unnjay are getting more adorable in every passing update, but again I'm too curious to know how would Uday react to Unnjay.

Part4:M's Masquerade ball tayari : Ash I have to give it to you for this amazing concept of a Masquerade ball with girls and boys going separately and boys finding their respective girls and dancing with them. The whole concept is so fairy tale-ish and awweosme. Loved it 

Part 5:Manveer-cutness personified :
 "Your a disaster waiting to happen, dear god girl can't you warn me of any attacks before i try my charming ways?"
"I don't care. The dog is a girl"
can manveer get more cuter than this? well , if it is ur ff then I'm sure they can. Ash I loved their nok-jhok. Wonderfull piece girl  . I'm completely gone gaga over this manveer. And the way Uday claimed the reports to be wrond was just astounding.

Part 6: Prince Udayveer-royalty redefined: Can a character be more charming, charismatic, poise full, royal than the character u have created. Every dimension of this character makes you fall in love with him. Be it his concern for Manyata and other girls or his charm over girls, or his confidence in handling the press. He is such a desirable material.Kuddos to u for this character. But then again I'm sacred of Uday reaction on Unnjay, hope he doent trash Vijay black and blue.

Part 7:Bublisa's atankvadi style entry and my Yash's tadkedar one-liners: Now ash seriouly are u planning to kill ur readers or what. I'm mean how can u make us laugh like idiots. I mean I was literally in this postion . And along with that u put my naughty yash baby's one-liners uff ash tum toh mar hi dalongi. The whole scene was  meritoriously done .

Part 8: Greek Goddess Aphrodite and my desi Hercules    : I have no word to decribe the whole manveer scene , I'm dancing in my manveer  dreamland  . Thanks for putting up Manyatas dress, it makes us all so much easier to imagine things.(Loved the dress).

Part 9: Trouble in manveer paradise: Again a very well articulated part. Udays anxiousness to propose Manyata, the attack, Manyatas fear, her helplessness, her desire for Uday, her pain and her forced decision to leave Uday was all so very well written .

Part 10:Manveer realtionship a cliffhanger : Uday leaving for London, just for letting Manyata go away from him is really tearing me apart. Now Please ash dont break Manveer. Infact The whole reattack on Uday,I see it like a reverse cupid for Manveer (Hopefully I'm right, or else this attack might take them even more far from each other, and I'm gonna smack  u  ). Now who is that Villan. OK it is a she, but then who-Natasha, or bubbly, or or...someoen from family like...like maasahab, or unnati (gosh nope ,ash I'm not mad yet )  you have made my small brain over work so all this stupid conclusion.well u r again good at leaving ur readers in a cliffhanger, eagerly waiting for the toxic truth.Want to know what nucler weapon u r gonna drop on ur readers.

sigh, look at the length of my comment, but then again, hopefully u r not angry on my late comment, take care, study well 







Edited by chitra_rao - 29 August 2012 at 3:11pm

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

kakacool123...navina...

kakacool123 Senior Member
kakacool123
kakacool123

Joined: 17 December 2011
Posts: 555

Posted: 01 September 2012 at 6:28pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by chitra_rao

Hey Ash, I'm back with comment cum analysis on ur update, I know I'm super late but you know my late latifagiri  . well I have no word to say how much I loved the update. It was fabulous, splendid with the perfect blend of manveer and also the tadkedar suspense twist. 

Analysis:

Part1:Rashi introduced, my minds confusion ball rolling :  well the name itself got me confused thought it was she, but it is he. Well it looks like he is gonna be reappearing in some of ur future updates also, he would play a substantial role in solving the mystery. I really welcomed this character wholeheartedly, seems to be very genuine and meticulous. Waiting to see his character unfold. One question, Udayveer is from Jayghar royal family u had mentioned teh Devghra royals also in ur first para, wondering why and how?

Part 2:M sets on the journey to re-discover herself: A question is raised on her capability to become a queen, and the way she answers to Unnati is just mind-blowing. Yes even ur leader is human, they can breakdown as well, they r leaders or royals because they know how to get back up again. Again very well penned ash

Part 3:Unnjay growing relationship alarming M: Again very well written ash, Unnjay are getting more adorable in every passing update, but again I'm too curious to know how would Uday react to Unnjay.

Part4:M's Masquerade ball tayari : Ash I have to give it to you for this amazing concept of a Masquerade ball with girls and boys going separately and boys finding their respective girls and dancing with them. The whole concept is so fairy tale-ish and awweosme. Loved it 

Part 5:Manveer-cutness personified :
 "Your a disaster waiting to happen, dear god girl can't you warn me of any attacks before i try my charming ways?"
"I don't care. The dog is a girl"
can manveer get more cuter than this? well , if it is ur ff then I'm sure they can. Ash I loved their nok-jhok. Wonderfull piece girl  . I'm completely gone gaga over this manveer. And the way Uday claimed the reports to be wrond was just astounding.

Part 6: Prince Udayveer-royalty redefined: Can a character be more charming, charismatic, poise full, royal than the character u have created. Every dimension of this character makes you fall in love with him. Be it his concern for Manyata and other girls or his charm over girls, or his confidence in handling the press. He is such a desirable material.Kuddos to u for this character. But then again I'm sacred of Uday reaction on Unnjay, hope he doent trash Vijay black and blue.

Part 7:Bublisa's atankvadi style entry and my Yash's tadkedar one-liners: Now ash seriouly are u planning to kill ur readers or what. I'm mean how can u make us laugh like idiots. I mean I was literally in this postion . And along with that u put my naughty yash baby's one-liners uff ash tum toh mar hi dalongi. The whole scene was  meritoriously done .

Part 8: Greek Goddess Aphrodite and my desi Hercules    : I have no word to decribe the whole manveer scene , I'm dancing in my manveer  dreamland  . Thanks for putting up Manyatas dress, it makes us all so much easier to imagine things.(Loved the dress).

Part 9: Trouble in manveer paradise: Again a very well articulated part. Udays anxiousness to propose Manyata, the attack, Manyatas fear, her helplessness, her desire for Uday, her pain and her forced decision to leave Uday was all so very well written .

Part 10:Manveer realtionship a cliffhanger : Uday leaving for London, just for letting Manyata go away from him is really tearing me apart. Now Please ash dont break Manveer. Infact The whole reattack on Uday,I see it like a reverse cupid for Manveer (Hopefully I'm right, or else this attack might take them even more far from each other, and I'm gonna smack  u  ). Now who is that Villan. OK it is a she, but then who-Natasha, or bubbly, or or...someoen from family like...like maasahab, or unnati (gosh nope ,ash I'm not mad yet )  you have made my small brain over work so all this stupid conclusion.well u r again good at leaving ur readers in a cliffhanger, eagerly waiting for the toxic truth.Want to know what nucler weapon u r gonna drop on ur readers.

sigh, look at the length of my comment, but then again, hopefully u r not angry on my late comment, take care, study well 







Your forgiven Chitra but only because i love you and ur analysis, the cliffhanggers conclustion will come in next update. Hope you like it but i'm afraid u all might throw ten buckets of tamatar and several chapels at me to answer your question, it was a blooper it was only supposed to be jaighar royals sorry for the blooper!!

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

chitra_rao

chitra_rao IF-Rockerz
chitra_rao
chitra_rao

Joined: 06 June 2009
Posts: 7542

Posted: 01 September 2012 at 7:31pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by kakacool123

Originally posted by chitra_rao

Hey Ash, I'm back with comment cum analysis on ur update, I know I'm super late but you know my late latifagiri  . well I have no word to say how much I loved the update. It was fabulous, splendid with the perfect blend of manveer and also the tadkedar suspense twist. 

Analysis:

Part1:Rashi introduced, my minds confusion ball rolling :  well the name itself got me confused thought it was she, but it is he. Well it looks like he is gonna be reappearing in some of ur future updates also, he would play a substantial role in solving the mystery. I really welcomed this character wholeheartedly, seems to be very genuine and meticulous. Waiting to see his character unfold. One question, Udayveer is from Jayghar royal family u had mentioned teh Devghra royals also in ur first para, wondering why and how?

Part 2:M sets on the journey to re-discover herself: A question is raised on her capability to become a queen, and the way she answers to Unnati is just mind-blowing. Yes even ur leader is human, they can breakdown as well, they r leaders or royals because they know how to get back up again. Again very well penned ash

Part 3:Unnjay growing relationship alarming M: Again very well written ash, Unnjay are getting more adorable in every passing update, but again I'm too curious to know how would Uday react to Unnjay.

Part4:M's Masquerade ball tayari : Ash I have to give it to you for this amazing concept of a Masquerade ball with girls and boys going separately and boys finding their respective girls and dancing with them. The whole concept is so fairy tale-ish and awweosme. Loved it 

Part 5:Manveer-cutness personified :
 "Your a disaster waiting to happen, dear god girl can't you warn me of any attacks before i try my charming ways?"
"I don't care. The dog is a girl"
can manveer get more cuter than this? well , if it is ur ff then I'm sure they can. Ash I loved their nok-jhok. Wonderfull piece girl  . I'm completely gone gaga over this manveer. And the way Uday claimed the reports to be wrond was just astounding.

Part 6: Prince Udayveer-royalty redefined: Can a character be more charming, charismatic, poise full, royal than the character u have created. Every dimension of this character makes you fall in love with him. Be it his concern for Manyata and other girls or his charm over girls, or his confidence in handling the press. He is such a desirable material.Kuddos to u for this character. But then again I'm sacred of Uday reaction on Unnjay, hope he doent trash Vijay black and blue.

Part 7:Bublisa's atankvadi style entry and my Yash's tadkedar one-liners: Now ash seriouly are u planning to kill ur readers or what. I'm mean how can u make us laugh like idiots. I mean I was literally in this postion . And along with that u put my naughty yash baby's one-liners uff ash tum toh mar hi dalongi. The whole scene was  meritoriously done .

Part 8: Greek Goddess Aphrodite and my desi Hercules    : I have no word to decribe the whole manveer scene , I'm dancing in my manveer  dreamland  . Thanks for putting up Manyatas dress, it makes us all so much easier to imagine things.(Loved the dress).

Part 9: Trouble in manveer paradise: Again a very well articulated part. Udays anxiousness to propose Manyata, the attack, Manyatas fear, her helplessness, her desire for Uday, her pain and her forced decision to leave Uday was all so very well written .

Part 10:Manveer realtionship a cliffhanger : Uday leaving for London, just for letting Manyata go away from him is really tearing me apart. Now Please ash dont break Manveer. Infact The whole reattack on Uday,I see it like a reverse cupid for Manveer (Hopefully I'm right, or else this attack might take them even more far from each other, and I'm gonna smack  u  ). Now who is that Villan. OK it is a she, but then who-Natasha, or bubbly, or or...someoen from family like...like maasahab, or unnati (gosh nope ,ash I'm not mad yet )  you have made my small brain over work so all this stupid conclusion.well u r again good at leaving ur readers in a cliffhanger, eagerly waiting for the toxic truth.Want to know what nucler weapon u r gonna drop on ur readers.

sigh, look at the length of my comment, but then again, hopefully u r not angry on my late comment, take care, study well 







Your forgiven Chitra but only because i love you and ur analysis, the cliffhanggers conclustion will come in next update. Hope you like it but i'm afraid u all might throw ten buckets of tamatar and several chapels at me to answer your question, it was a blooper it was only supposed to be jaighar royals sorry for the blooper!!


OK so the devghar royals mentioned that was a blooper, thanks for clearing that doubt. Now I being an impatient reader would want u to update fast but not at the cost of ur studies, so study well and updae whenever u hav timeHug


Edited by chitra_rao - 01 September 2012 at 7:31pm

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

kakacool123

kakacool123 Senior Member
kakacool123
kakacool123

Joined: 17 December 2011
Posts: 555

Posted: 02 September 2012 at 10:05am | IP Logged
Thank for understanding plus i have lost heritage to do and i'm just starting i think vampy is going to hang me i promised her a chapter by 5
i'm scared
...navina... IF-Stunnerz
...navina...
...navina...

Joined: 17 December 2011
Posts: 35970

Posted: 02 September 2012 at 10:58am | IP Logged
Originally posted by kakacool123

Thank for understanding plus i have lost heritage to do and i'm just starting i think vampy is going to hang me i promised her a chapter by 5
i'm scared
 
Hi dear,
This is the 1st time I'm commenting on your ff. I just wanted u to know that as much as I like Lost Heritage; I like Heart's Owner more. So-could u please update this 1 first. I'm dying to know who Uday saw standing at the gate...I'm guessing UNNATI- but I wish I'm wrong.
 
And about SAIRA...dont worry, she can't do u anything...
She promised us an update of LOVE COMES AGAIN last week...we're still waiting.
U can use that against her!!!
vampire12345678 IF-Rockerz
vampire12345678
vampire12345678

Joined: 08 April 2012
Posts: 5836

Posted: 02 September 2012 at 11:13am | IP Logged
Originally posted by navinahun

Originally posted by kakacool123

Thank for understanding plus i have lost heritage to do and i'm just starting i think vampy is going to hang me i promised her a chapter by 5
i'm scared
 
Hi dear,
This is the 1st time I'm commenting on your ff. I just wanted u to know that as much as I like Lost Heritage; I like Heart's Owner more. So-could u please update this 1 first. I'm dying to know who Uday saw standing at the gate...I'm guessing UNNATI- but I wish I'm wrong.
 
And about SAIRA...dont worry, she can't do u anything...
She promised us an update of LOVE COMES AGAIN last week...we're still waiting.
U can use that against her!!!

navi u are planning and platting against me LOL very bad and i would have updated but i am super busy and no using that against me

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

kakacool123...navina...

vampire12345678 IF-Rockerz
vampire12345678
vampire12345678

Joined: 08 April 2012
Posts: 5836

Posted: 02 September 2012 at 11:15am | IP Logged
Originally posted by kakacool123

Thank for understanding plus i have lost heritage to do and i'm just starting i think vampy is going to hang me i promised her a chapter by 5
i'm scared

dont worry take your time ash but update soon

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