Friends eh? - Page 10

This content was originally posted by: earth1978

 

you have go tme all wrong avantika ( thats the name of my dear daughter so i have special affection for ur name ) .😳 i have not turned a sympathiser. i think ym english is bad or i dont have the capacity to explain myself fully. which can lead to things turning ugly but i will try. imagine u being present with jagat and gauri. will u stoop to the level his friends did even if u knew what they have doe?

it is all about grace and diginity of our own personality i was talking about.

anandi had many occassions to feel the satisfaction when gaur had miscarriage but she did not. that is her grace.

hate and seeking revenge and liking people getting wat they deserve is a bitter exercise it can distort ur personality.

again smthing personal. my sil was quite young at the tim eof my marriage, she wasnt very good with my family or me. all times i used to think i want her to taste her ownmedicine. and infact she did get a sasural where she has problems. btu tsrangely i dsnt give me any satisfaction. i feel sory for her becuase she is also a girl. i dont liek when my husband becomes sad litening to her problems. my mil cries ... and i am surprised at myself that i feel sorry for her too which i thought was never possible. i always thought i wished them to taste their own medicine but seeningher life actually spoiled makes me feel terrible. if what u fantasize acually happens reality changes my dear.

i used to get so angry at her that when i was alone i wud curse her ... was my personality good then?

forgiveness is a virtue which has its merits. i dontknow if one day u will relaise this or not. basically ur views cannot be formed by me but by urself only.

This content was originally posted by: avantikasharma1

 

Honestly, I have no clue what are you trying to say. None of us approve Jagiya's friends. Thats what I have said in my post. I have not seen such people, but I was not minding Jagiya the character getting bashed

. You said you are not symphatiser of Jagiya, then? Why are you feeling bad for him or that he shouldn't go through what he is going. He shouldn't get a taste of his own medicine? And especially when it is through his own circumsatnces.

No no its not right. He should go through some of the troubles, without  Anandi's hand in it. What you say is right for real life. I wouldn't wish ill for someone who did wrong to me or spend life thinking revenge. i got better things to do. 😆. But its a story, a fiction of negative character being bashed. I am sure my prayers have got nothing to do with it. I am not praying to God to make CV's bash Jagiya.

I am not sure if you are consistent in your posts. I think at one place you said their marriage should disintergrate but without friends involvement in it.  Why are you wishing its disintergration, an ill will against them? (this in a word for Gauri)

This content was originally posted by: avantikasharma1

@Earth: I donot really think that Gauri being at the superior position is the trouble in the this relationship. Even at college she was much better in studies and at that time too J used to adjust and even help her.

I had posted the folowing in your thread,since my viewpoint has not changed, I repost it again:

 

 I don't think the marriage is disintergrating as yet. And this is just one incident adding fuel to fire. Jagya had already feared such ridicules when he got appointment as an assistant to Gauri. Thats why he wanted to get his position changed. The onus is on him to behave maturely and ignore such comments. Of course he has to be helped by Gauri. For start Gari madam should learn when to talk what? I didn't find a mistake in her asking to wind up early but to start giving instructions to Jagiya in front of everyone😲, especially when everyone is making his fun 😆? She is very silly that way. She did the same in BM incident, in front of dean, in front of villagers (when she announced her marital status without realizing the implication of being a second wife, and then getting angry at Anandi for all the insults phooli and other heaped on her) 😆.

I honestly feel that a distance is going top grow between J and G. J is now very sensitive to the idea of being inferior to his wife and peers. Its very interesting to note that the man who was very helpful with the household work when they were studying, is now gradually becoming resistant to the idea. He didn't want to serve the chips and put down the empty glasses. Its because he is fighting tooth and nail to the idea of being inferior to Gauri. I predict in the coming episodes he will become even more unco-operative. He will not help G even in small things and may disobey her commands. This will create tensions as G will think he is becoming insensitive and wants to treat her like a dirt. He doesn't respect her problems and help requests.

This may require some maturity and sensitivity on gauri's part. For start she may start reassurring him that he is not inferior. This can not be done by praising alone. The best is not giving him any instructions whatsoever and talking to him properly. What did she do in the hospital? I asked you something Dr Jagat? 😲 It will not help. Once Jagat is reassured of his position, he will return to back to being normal and cooperative husband he was to gauri. Otherwise get ready for fireworks. Because both of them are self-centered and selfish.

 

This content was originally posted by: avantikasharma1

Yes I can understand your viewpoint. Even I went through something similar. Some friends believe they know everything about life and can guide you on it. The way they do is not by standing with you, but giving you lectures or shouting at your mistakes.   I was going through a difficult time and I was not aware of govt offices' procedures, so some of my documents were not with me. It was not a big mistake, but I was bit scared. And look at my friend, she had the nerve to scold me! Here I am scared, if you can't say anything positive atleast don't talk. More than you I want my life to come in order.

😲

 

I also obseved another thing, these people don't let you think positive about life. At first I thought it was her nature. She will talk so negative about her life, this won't happen that won't happen!! But she even started predicting similar about me. Why are you trying it, it won't happen. That was enough. I began distancing myself from her. I would say a friendly hi, but would refuse to hang out with her. At first she resisted, but gradually accepted the truth. As tinoo said in one of the post, with friends like these who needs enemies.

 

Good you broke off with your friend!  There is no need for such people ⭐️

This content was originally posted by: groovychica_22

To a certain, partial degree i can sympathize with Jagat's character at the moment. having experienced a somewhat similiar predicament in my life...i was raised in the us went to medical school in india, and when i came back i too had a very difficult time readjusting. my friends were all somewhere else studying/had become closer while i was gone, my dad became sick, i no longer was the baby/center of attention in my home as i had been before i left... everyone was so preoccupied in their own lives and for a while i did feel depressed and dejected as i no longer felt i fit in. it took me a while to regain my motivation and finally give my boards...my parents too were very frustrated with me as they didn't understand what i was doing with my education and kept nagging me everyday. jagat too just lost all connection with his family, couldn't give his ms, his one wife is gone out of his life, his other wife has moved on professionally, and so have all of his friends. 

however, what stops me from sympathizing with him completely is the way he blamed anandi for every single one of his problems. as she was as big of a victim as he in this child marriage. had he just chosen to get married and end that relationship it would have been okay...as i can agree that it was unfair to have forced him into marriage when he was a child. but the manner in which he insulted anandi for not being modern...forgetting the fact that when they were children she was smarter than him leading to dadisa burning all of her books...or blamed her for the family's lack of acceptance of gauri as well as gauri's miscarriage...tormenting her not only by getting married but taunting her every step of the way to the extent that he attempted to have his new wife take her place in the house that's been anandi's since she was 8 years old...that's too much. such a guy doesn't deserve happiness, and deserves what ever torture he is going through. he couldn't understand anandi, can't understand gauri. and it's only fair to me that gauri doesn't care to understand him and choses to ignore his childish attitude/tantrums.

as for gauri...she proved her selfishness too. she wanted to marry jagat, and so she did. he left his wife and his family. then what was this insistence that the whole family should accept her, and disown anandi? does she not have any sense that she is demanding too much? she came and destroyed anandi's marriage not vice versa yet taunts anandi like she's the homewrecker and insists jagat do the same. to me it only makes sense too that such a selfish person cannot be happy. both showed their childish characters early on in the serial so it was only a matter of time that their marriage failed. neither one of them can see past themselves and are so self absorbed and keen on blaming others for their failed relationship. now that they have no outsider to blame what else can they do but blame each other? 

i believe both are wrong...neither is right and both deserve what they are getting. their marriage can only be expected to fail not because they chose to marry but because of the insensible manner in which they handled everything and treated everyone...proving their immaturity. and when too immature selfish people unite the only thing we can expect is what we are seeing right now!