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Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon

A question to women over here (Page 11)

surenkal Goldie
surenkal
surenkal

Joined: 30 August 2010
Posts: 1450

Posted: 05 April 2012 at 2:23am | IP Logged
Women should not be encouraged to suffer this kind of harassment quietly for anyone's sake... Family, sister inlaw whatever.
 and That is the real reason one has a problem with the show. By showing that Khushi is keeping quiet for the family's sake you are telling millions of women out there that it is ok to keep quiet when you are being subjected to sexual harassment.
YOU HAVE TO SPEAK UP KHUSHI.. you have to tell someone or take some action on your own...

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HeadOverHeelsSunoNa...

SunoNa... IF-Sizzlerz
SunoNa...
SunoNa...

Joined: 16 May 2011
Posts: 13292

Posted: 05 April 2012 at 2:59am | IP Logged
Originally posted by HeadOverHeels

The problem is that this girl is currently trapped in a situation/family where two siblings are determined to always keep the truth from each other, in order for the other to not be hurt, and in the bargain, they both equally allow others to suffer for it. Their relationship alone is quite a toxic one, and borders on obsession instead of sibling love.

Okay, forget these two sibling's, why cant she share it with her sibling??

On the other hand, you have a young girl who is raised to do her "duty" even if it means she offers herself up as a sacrifice. That is her role, and there are times when she chooses to defy, but at the end of the day, she remains submissive and accepting of her lot in life. She has been forcibly made to choose this marriage against her own will, and whatever comes with it. And, I had this problem with the show right from when people suggested Arnav simply marry Khushi and the rest would fall into place. Sadly, what is happening now is not surprising in the least... Khushi has literally (and unknowingly) been placed in harm's way (Shayam) who was only going to get bolder in his intentions while she lived under the same roof as him. and, Khushi being Khushi (a great example yesterday in the Green Room) will NEVER think of backing out of something if it is requested by her husband's family (SPECIALLY his sister) as she remains duty bound to him.

She isnt submissive with Arnav, why submissive with Shyam is my question.
The least she can do is, get away when he approaches her, the smile he gave her while asking her to go with medical store, his intentions can clearly be known in that facial expression he gave, she could have gone out and just given route details to shyam , and she said she will go alone the medical store wasnt far.
She should smartly get away frm getting into such situation's. His obsession is reaching new heights daily. What im saying is she is not safe with him alone, he can do anything. Im talking in this terms, how can she alone handle such a man?
She though he would change but now she has realized neither Anjali nor his kid matter anything to him.

If I were in that position, I highly doubt I would even be married to a man against my will... But on the off chance I was, and had some lech after me... It would become public knowledge and to hell with ANY family, be they inlaws or not, who preferred lies and half truths over the real thing. 

Telling her family atleast Bua, Garima , payal should be done

Not a single person on the show who does things to "protect" their loved ones is actually doing their loved ones any favors, but instead is making things worse. And, that is what silence and lies does... it ruins people and their relationships, and builds up needless resentment.

Totally agree on this!! Very well put. They are in no way protecting rather putting their loved ones in more danger .
gheeshakkar Goldie
gheeshakkar
gheeshakkar

Joined: 25 November 2011
Posts: 1351

Posted: 05 April 2012 at 3:04am | IP Logged

Her silence really, really bothers me, even though it is just fiction. I think before the big confession that people are expecting from her, she needs to find a friend. Confidante before confession.

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SunoNa...

SunoNa... IF-Sizzlerz
SunoNa...
SunoNa...

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Posted: 05 April 2012 at 3:08am | IP Logged
@all: Thnk u for ur amazing replies. Hug
Glad most of u agree that its high time she shares it with someone specially with Payal.
Amanram IF-Dazzler
Amanram
Amanram

Joined: 01 July 2009
Posts: 3416

Posted: 05 April 2012 at 3:14am | IP Logged
I am replying in the context of the story only here
 
Kushi should be confiding in Payal and who herself should be confiding in Akash and this would mean that both sisters have the support of someone within the household to try and thwart Shyam's behaviour.

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SunoNa...

fan145 IF-Rockerz
fan145
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Posts: 8421

Posted: 05 April 2012 at 3:21am | IP Logged
yeah as u said i always think y khushi is sooo strong against arnav but not shyam ...i mean she has power to push arnav back but not shyam??
i thnk it wud be bttr for her to discusss this man's ugliness vth payal{i knw she is dumb too }but sharing gives a relief and as u said she cant put up act infrnt of tht creep!!!

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anurao.66 IF-Rockerz
anurao.66
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Posted: 05 April 2012 at 3:24am | IP Logged
I loved the post and a very valid one.

I think Kushi should knee him. If she cant then she should stamp his foot hard. Otherwise she should confide in somebody probably Payal to take care of that creepwa.







----------------------------------------------------
Life is too short, Enjoy it too the fullest

Anu

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StormChaser IF-Rockerz
StormChaser
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Posted: 05 April 2012 at 3:37am | IP Logged
Firstly, Fab post! I read most of the comments and must say I agree with most of them.
Now coming to my answer to your question...

I feel it's not Khushi's fault only and I wouldn't blame her completely. I would also blame it on the situations that made her act that way. I wouldn't tell her to just bluntly tell the Raizadas or Arnav given the kind of person she is and also given that the Raizadas blindly believe Shyam just because of Anjali's blind faith in him. They most probably wouldn't have believed her and would have blamed her for everything. They would believe Shyam thinking that they've known him for more years than Khushi and  he would never do such a thing. Sometimes we just land in a situation where we don't think about all the after-effects but just do what we feel is right at that point of time.

And I do admit that Shyam does freak me out like hell and I'm really freaked out about what extent he can go to hurt Khushi. I also don't want to blame Khushi if she didn't tell anyone the first time because it's really easy to judge and give advice but only similar situations will show how we can actually handle it. I think even I would have got scared the first time and might have kept quite about it. But still Khushi was brave enough to actually go try telling the truth to Anjali but it was Anjali's paranoid behaviour that made her keep mum.
 
I feel that both Arnav and Khushi are just making Anjali more vulnerable to everything. They are making her so dependent on others. I think if she was just given a chance by them to handle a situation on her own she might just come out braver than everyone. If they really want to help her it would be best if they told her, maybe not in a very direct way which she obviously wouldn't believe but in an indirect way. Like creating situations where she starts doubting Shyam's intentions or trying to make her believe that she shouldn't blindly trust anyone, not even her husband. She has shown earlier that, though in a more distraught manner, she has lived through her parents dying and her broken marriage and that she still tries to find happiness in everything she does and in everyone she sees. So I feel this was a mistake made by both Arnav and Khushi.
 
I am also fine with the fact that she decided not to tell anyone and give him a second chance when she came to know that Anjali was pregnant but she should have told someone atleast after realizing that there was no point in giving him a second chance. She shouldn't try to handle everything herself because he is getting gutsier day by day and he can do anything. Not trying to be stereotypical or anything but men are physically stronger than women. So it would be best if she tried to stay away from him as much as possible and tried to tell Arnav though she thinks that he wouldn't believe her. And if he didn't believe then she could always ask Payal to support her since she already knows everything.
 
She should also try avoiding talking to him as much as possible and stick to other people of the house more so that he can't do anything. She is a good manipulator and she has shown that she has been able to handle Arnav with her verbal strength though he is not evil like Shyam. She should use those skills of her now. It's about time. I really don't like the fact that she actually went with him when she could've easily declined after going outside. This hasn't happened once but twice.
 
Lastly, I don't understand why Anjali's trying to push her husband on Khushi. Being a woman she should understand that Khushi might not be feeling comfortable with him. It's not like she has a problem with the other men of the house. She's fine with Akash but still she does show discomfort in Shyam's case. Shyam is not even related to her so closely that she might be at ease with him. He is her sister-in-law's husband. That's quite far a relation. And it is really dumb if she thinks that Shyam cannot find his way to a medical store that's supposedly very near to the place. Anjali just disappoints me sometimes.
 
OMG! Such a long post! And I must have talked about almost everything else other than answering your question! I must have pakao-fied your brain...Sorry! Tongue

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