Writers Corner

   

SunShower - The Faux Rain (Novella) (Page 2)

Post Reply New Post

Page 2 of 10

Page 1
Page   of 10
Page 3 Page 10

HPmaniac

IF-Dazzler

HPmaniac

Joined: 25 December 2006

Posts: 2885

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 7:50am | IP Logged
Wow. Just... wow! I was like...ShockedUnhappyLOLSmile Thumbs UpWhat would I have to do to read the rest? When are you publishing?

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

Sawyer_TomRafz

Dear Guest, Being an unregistered member you are missing out on participating in the lively discussions happening on the topic "SunShower - The Faux Rain (Novella) (Page 2)" in Writers Corner forum. In addition you lose out on the fun interactions with fellow members and other member exclusive features that India-Forums has to offer. Join India's most popular discussion portal on Indian Entertainment. It's FREE and registration is effortless so JOIN NOW!

Swaron238

Goldie

Swaron238

Joined: 30 March 2012

Posts: 1061

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 9:44am | IP Logged
Rafi di!!!!! I love u for writing this!! The prologue is so so so interesting!! Pls tell me wen r u publishing this novel??? :D waiting eagerly!! :D

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

Sawyer_TomRafz

NinaArief

Senior Member

NinaArief

Joined: 10 January 2012

Posts: 418

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 10:09am | IP Logged
from all teh comments i gather that this is a book to be published , and perhaps that you are not updating here at all,but your prologue is soo gripping , please let me when ever you do get it published.. it would be a real treat..

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

Sawyer_TomRafz

Snowey

IF-Rockerz

Snowey

Joined: 15 March 2012

Posts: 9620

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 11:43am | IP Logged
Rafi if i could write half as you do i would be sharing my work with everyone and anyone i know. Smile
Very gripping prologue, hope that i get to read the finished book someday. 

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

Sawyer_TomRafz

Rafz

IF-Rockerz

Rafz

Joined: 24 February 2008

Posts: 8312

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 11:48am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Sawyer_Tom

Rafi!!! I'm going to kill you. You are probably not going to read this comment but that doesn't mean I wont tell you what a BIG MEANIE you are. Yes, you! The one who writes all this awesome stuff and then very inconveniently doesn't share it with people like me who would die to read anything written by you. You thinks it's so funny to lead a parallel life (well not really, but from my POV at least, you are) going about writing intriguing prologues and other stuff and then thinking to yourself - Hey! Here's an idea! Let's NOT tell Nidhi about this! It's not like she is dying to read it or something! Inconsiderate, that's what you are! 

Anyways, just tell me when are you planning on publishing this book. You owe me at least that much. You've got me all riled up and I can hardly wait. I absolutely loved the prologue. Not that you care.Broken Heart

Everyone better thank Sawyer-Ji cuz I am only updating this cuz of her. Sawyer-ji , (I had posted this AGES ago .. and IF ka writers corner is kinda dead .. didnt think ppl would be interested .. I didn't PM ANYONE for this .. cuz its not D3 related .. so yeah .. thank you for having expectations from me, the way you do. Means a LOT . Embarrassed I love u wayyy more than Chee-Green will ever love his Chu-Chu Chee-Piya Tongue Jokes .. I wuvvv u ! Hug

Originally posted by Sudha-SK

Rafi if i could write half as you do i would be sharing my work with everyone and anyone i know. Smile
Very gripping prologue, hope that i get to read the finished book someday. 


Thank you so much Sudha ... I dont think I deserve as much of a compliment .. but Thank you SO very much .. I guess kabhi kabhi  likh leti hoon .. but I have these HORRIBLE writer's blocks ... ke bass kya kahoun .. LOL

Originally posted by HPmaniac

Wow. Just... wow! I was like...ShockedUnhappyLOLSmile Thumbs UpWhat would I have to do to read the rest? When are you publishing? 

Heyyy thank you  so much Sarah ! Embarrassed I was hoping to get u to make those faces .. Wink Publish .. lol .. I have written only 5 chapters so far ... and Ive spoken to an editor .. book should take 2 years to go out in print ? Let see .. but will update chapter one shortly :) 

Originally posted by NinaArief

from all teh comments i gather that this is a book to be published , and perhaps that you are not updating here at all,but your prologue is soo gripping , please let me when ever you do get it published.. it would be a real treat..

I wasnt thinking of updating it .. but I have awsome friends (as u will deduce from the comments) and they FORCE me to update . I am a lucky b*tch wont u say ? Cool And yes .. this IS kinda autobiographical .. something I intend to publish in 2 years time , InshAllah.

Originally posted by *Nishi*

Hey Alizey, welcome to the writers corner!! you're story seems interesting.. really interested in those last promises. 

Thank you .. My name is Rafi .. Alizey is .. kind of  me .. since this is autobigraphical thingy .. Sorta .. thank you once again .. You will see why Alizay extorted those promises from ppl before she began, once the story unfolds Embarrassed

Originally posted by Swaron238

Rafi di!!!!! I love u for writing this!! The prologue is so so so interesting!! Pls tell me wen r u publishing this novel??? :D waiting eagerly!! :D

Thank you very much Jyothika ... mebbe in two years time Embarrassed I havent finished writing .. 

Originally posted by austenrox

wow, that was like a nostalgic symphony in  abstract motion

Thank you Koyal !  Thats a very beautiful way to put it .. 

Originally posted by jyoti_l

loved the prologue...

especially the promise part...

Thank you .. hope u like Chapter 1 just as much Embarrassed

Originally posted by --Shree--

Smile

Embarrassed

Originally posted by SwaRonArsha95

Loved the prolouge especially the promise thing. Seems really interesting 

WOW how did u find this ? LOL Thank you Nishu ! Embarrassed

Originally posted by rIDhid3rox

loved the prologue...
it seems very promising and interesting also

Thank you Embarrassed
_______________________

Putting up chapter 1 in like 5 minutes .. tahnks for all the love evreyone

The following 6 member(s) liked the above post:

NinaAriefSwaron238Sawyer_TomSnowey.AbhIyalicious.Tyro

Rafz

IF-Rockerz

Rafz

Joined: 24 February 2008

Posts: 8312

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 11:50am | IP Logged

CHAPTER 1 – The New She

 22nd Feb, 2002

 

First day of sophomore year and the teacher was late. Usually the class teacher was the first one in after the morning assembly. Possibly because exposure to the harsh Middle-Eastern sun could trigger an outbreak of Acne Vulgaris, or as the common man calls it "pimples". Pimples in your thirties is bad news - it could send your marriage on the rocks as it essentially means you have a horrible diet, zero self maintenance, and oil drops making ridges on your forehead. NOT a pretty sight.  Major turn-off.

 

The girls on the other hand, couldn't care any less. They loved it as the sun kissed their fresh, pink faces, giving them that Megan Fox like "sexy tan" they've always dreamt of. Acne was welcome as it hinted the onset of puberty. They looked forward to it as a leaf-caterpillar looks forward to growing its first pseudo-wings hoping that it'll grow out of being a lowly caterpillar into something more graceful, a butterfly. So they took their time as they trudged on to their classroom in noisy bunches, discussing in unnecessarily hushed voices about the latest developments in the so so scandalous affair between their 8th grade teacher with the pockmarked face (Ms. Nora) and the Slightly more blessed in physical appearances Economics teacher (Mr. Allen). It was spring in Fujairah, and they were thirteen. Their life, which revolved around Atif Aslam and Ali Zafar (or N*Sync for the more Western savvy), padded bras, girlfriends and prospective boyfriends, was good. Way way better than that of sad, old, destined-to-be-single Ms. Nora, bless her soul.

 

Five minutes since the morning assembly was over and she wasn't here yet. Unlike her jaded classmates, Alizey had initially harbored a mild curiosity regarding the new class teacher/chemistry teacher but now even she was resigned to doodling on her notebook out of boredom. She looked out the classroom window which was just behind her, onto the makeshift basket ball court cum school assembly point. She still remembered her first day at Sea-view High and she'd hated it, day 1 on. It seemed like it was just yesterday she swung her backpack and dragged herself along the cobbled driveway that led to the entrance of the main-building. Her head still hurt from the numerous times it banged against the head-rest of the seat in front of her throughout the hour long drive to the new school in a bus that should've been scrapped ages ago. Although she suspected her mom's constant nagging about finishing her milk and sandwich for lunch, keeping the headscarf on, and the lecture about not talking to boys had something to do with it. Seriously who packs an 8th grader sandwich and MILK for lunch?! And asking a 13 year old to keep on the headscarf under the fierce middle-eastern sun is like asking an LA babe to go to the beach in plumber's overalls. As for boys … I mean come freakin' on … If you don't talk to boys, who'll you play football with!?

 

So instead of going directly to the classroom, she took a detour to the restroom, the directions to which a freckled junior thankfully pointed out. First things first. She ducked into a cubicle and took off the offending head-piece and shoved it into the backpack. Folding the elastic along the waistband of her coal-grey skirt thrice over itself, she un-tucked her shirt over it so that it covered the folds such that instead of the dowdy, matronly sweeping-the-floor-length she wore from home, her skirt was now well above the knees. She unbuttoned the cuffs of her shirt and folded the sleeves so that they were a nice 3/4th. Once outside the cubicle, she fished a comb out of her backpack and combed the fringes back and forth so that her hair had a kind of tousled, right-out-of-bed look. Just the way she liked it. For final touch, she the flicked the top button open and eased the tie out the death-noose around her neck until it hung loosely below the first button. Yup, Alizey M. Khan was now ready to take on high school.

 

She took the stairs to the first floor girl's wing and walked upto the door that said Junior Year, Section C. She knocked lightly and a serene voice bade her to enter. The classroom was your ordinary room, with chairs table, boys and girls of all shapes and sizes in drab grey and blue uniform, complete with a teacher with a medi skirt with a ruler in her hand. What was NOT usual was … the German wall in between. Rows and rows of desks and chairs thrown around haphazardly and boys and girls on polar opposite ends of the room … Oh right … China , chopsticks …Middle east , segregation …

 

The sound of the classroom door slamming brought Ali out of her reverie.

 Back to the teacher who was late. She looked like your run-of-the-mill post-graduate from some third grade University in Kerala, India who struck gold and got herself a position with a GEMS institution in the UAE and she was to teach chemistry.  The lady wore a tacky saari with horrible colour combination that hinted cheap upbringing and even cheaper taste and the students dismissed her at first glance as someone they didn't need to take seriously. Very soon, they knew better.

 

For the reader's benefit, although one of the "branded" schools, the GEMS chairman was notorious for his partiality in picking out oil-slicked South Indians for teachers. The State Governor of Kerala loved him. The students, of course, hated him.

 

Naseema, was one of the first to stand up to greet her. (In an Asianized school like theirs, students were expected to stand up in their seats and greet the teacher in a ridiculous chorus of "Good Morniiing Ma'am") Naseema, born to a Bangladeshi shop-keeper father and his very submissive wife, was the most obedient and polite of the lot. So no surprises there. She was soon followed by the desi trio: Zaraa  (Missy perfect) and her friends Farzana (hella tall and dusky, she'd be almost sexy if she wasn't so stupid in the head) and Asra (pimple issues.)

 This was the "nice" lot. Next to get up was Rosa and Rosy, the oh-so-annoying twins (they were rumoured to have been BORN in the school and beteen the two of them , planned to bury their bones in the school, but that's a story best reserved for some other day)  followed by Ahlam  (Palestinian, had  her native home blown to bits by bombs but lives quite the life here in the 16 Buildings, Fujairah absolutely oblivious to any bombings whatsoever.), Farzana 2 (Half Sri-Lankan, Half- Bengali, frizzy haired, the kind that lived through high school hating the prettier girls and generating vicious gossip about them) and Heba (A not-so-Egyptian Egyptian. Very pretty, very sweet.).

 

The last one to get up was Alizey. Defiance written all over her face, this was one kid who never failed to piss off a teacher or superintendent. So naturally she was the first one to irk Ms. Priya (the new class teacher cum chemistry teacher).

 

The following 10 member(s) liked the above post:

Trouble_Magnet-FrozenRain-PhosphenesSwaron238Radioactive.Sawyer_Tom.AbhIyalicious.SnoweyTyromarauder

NBTanHa

IF-Rockerz

NBTanHa

Joined: 17 December 2011

Posts: 5254

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 11:52am | IP Logged
First of all thank you soo much for updating this and Nidhi thanks for making her update this LOL

Awesome start Rafi di...loved the way you described Aziley's charecter Smile great first chapter and I hope you update soon Embarrassed


Edited by SwaRonArsha95 - 30 May 2012 at 12:32am

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Sawyer_Tom

Sawyer_Tom

IF-Dazzler

Sawyer_Tom

Joined: 22 March 2012

Posts: 3574

Posted: 29 May 2012 at 11:56am | IP Logged
Res. Sorry Rafz will have to edit tomorrow. Unhappy

Unreserved

Rafi. First things first, thanks. A LOT. For updating. I didn't think you would actually go through with it. I know, I know more faith and all. But like you said, the Writer's Corner is kinda dead. So, you hardly had any incentives. Till of course you pointed out that I had somehow managed to convince you to update. *pats self on the back*Cool 

So anyways, coming to the update. When I read the prologue, this was NOT at all what I expected. What I had expected was some soul searching journey of a girl brought up in the urban, modern world, with more positive experiences than negative.That would have been a good story. But not half as good as this. You cannot imagine my joy when I realized that it was something totally unexpected. I love the unexpected. It has a thrilling quality to it. 

I love the character of Alizey. Not because she is the bold, bitchy, no-nonsense types. Though that certainly adds to her charm. But what I particularly like about her is her approach towards life. I know you might be thinking ki itne chote se update mai itna sab kaise samajh aata hai. But I have this habit of reading in between lines. I love how she indulges herself in living her life on her own terms. That part was aptly highlighted when she blatantly disregarded the school rules along with her dominant mother's instructions. I find it very admirable because those are the kinda people I like.  

The story so far has been beautifully written, with particular attention to small details. And I absolutely love that fact about your writing. I don't like it when people (mostly me) skip the intricate details of the story. It loses it's charm because of that. But your ability in detailing is laudable. I have rarely seen anything so beautifully yet technically described. It was damn refreshing.

And Shishir can say that this is a chick flick all he wants. But this is so NOT. I'll tell you what this is. Reality. Stark naked reality. In a chick flick everything is airy-fairy, with problems so trivial and stupid that beyond a certain point it becomes quite annoying. And you can always expect a happy ending. This is SO not that. It's the Middle East, for crying out loud!! I'm not at all sure if this is going to have a happy ending. *fingers crossed for tragic ending*

So Rafi I'm expecting another update quite soon. So you had better not disappoint me! 

Love, 
Impatient, yet highly delighted Nidz. Heart

P.S. Oooh. Almost forgot. I loved the dissection of the human race. So true.LOL


Edited by Sawyer_Tom - 29 May 2012 at 9:40pm

The following 3 member(s) liked the above post:

NinaAriefSwaron238Rafz

Post Reply New Post

Go to top

Related Topics

  Topics Topic Starter Replies Views Last Post
Rain :- A Beauty Of Nature

2 3 4 5 6 7

PinkCinderella 53 2175 29 November 2011 at 10:03am
By Liashna
The Rain Dance- one shot story bheegi 4 805 24 August 2008 at 7:38am
By bheegi

Forum Quick Jump

Forum Category

Active Forums

Writers Corner Topic Index

Limit search to this Forum only.

 

Disclaimer: All Logos and Pictures of various Channels, Shows, Artistes, Media Houses, Companies, Brands etc. belong to their respective owners, and are used to merely visually identify the Channels, Shows, Companies, Brands, etc. to the viewer. Incase of any issue please contact the webmaster.