Posted: 06 January 2012 at 1:00pm | IP Logged
On first glance, he was too shocked to speak. His face wrenched itself into a horrified stare, as he realised the flames were leaping all about her. "Phulwa",
he said, an unmistakable quiver in his voice as he hoped against hope she was still listening.
Her eyes fluttered open, and as she saw him, all she could think was for him to stay away, to stay safe. She could not have him join in the game of death she was trapped in and all she wanted was him safe.
He could visibly see her writhing in pain and somewhere he knew he had to stop it. Disregarding his own life and her warning, he ran over to pick her up as she fainted right in his arms. "Aankhein kholo Phulwa" His repeated pleas for her to wake up were to no avail, in desperation he screamed out her name, but she was listening no more. His eyes could see but his mind wouldn't let him accept it.
The crowd of the roads kicked him around but he could not think, he could only feel - sheer desperation had forced him out of his house to beg for the life he carried in his hands. With every cry for help rejected, he could only call out to her to keep her from falling away. It was no longer just to keep her awake, but to keep himself going on.
His emotions were running as he let out a loud scream in absolute helplessness. He could feel her slipping away but he couldn't stop, he had to keep walking. He felt not his own pain but the sound of her heart weakening against him. He felt not his exhausation but the essense of her life seeping away. He promised he would not let anything happen to her - his own life depended on it.
She heard his cries and for a fleeting moment, forced herself to open her eyes to reassure that she was still with him.
But could fate separate them? As she had once been intertwined with him when she had first fallen in love, once again they were joined together - only this time he couldn't keep her apart.
They were so close, yet she could not hear him through the barrier of glass. His eyes moved around only for signs of her heartbeat - proof that she was not lost.
He knew it was no longer in his hands and he slowly sat down to think for the first time that night. His mind instinctively strayed back to the peals of her laughter and the caring hand that had stopped his pain. He had known her for long but his memory would only remember the sparse few moments of sweetness she had brought into his life. As he closed his eyes, a single tear rolled down, a tear full of sorrow and pain.
He looked at the bangle he could not separate from himself, and it brought back memories of a girl he had once deceived and humiliated. She had entrusted her heart to him, and the pain of breaking it reverberated in himself.
In an instant, it was as though his heart could feel hers and his mind could read hers. "Kyun roka tumne mujhe Phulwa?" He questioned her, knowing full well the answer lied within his own heart. With the doctor's words, he could only confirm what he didn't want to accept: their hearts were inextricably linked to one anothers'.
He looked over her unconscious self that still took his name, as though it had been etched in ink within her. The doctor's poetic verses (I'm sorry but her rambling was seriously annoying me) clashed loudly with his own beliefs: they were enemies and would remain so. No love, no concern - he was denying that he ever felt anything for her.
But his heart could only take him so far. Her voice was paving a new path towards her own, one that he could not help but travel on. He could fill up himself with hatred but it was all drowned under the feelings he had for her. He could not look at her and hate her anymore, he had fallen too deep into her own pain to bring her any more. He was hesitant at first, unsure of whether he should let himself feel for her.
For the first time that night, she responded to his pleas and answered all his questions: he was the only thing keeping her tied to this life. And finally, he understood. He had never been alone that night - she was always there. With the saddest smile, he took her hand as a vow to never let her walk alone in pain again.
This episode was so emotional. It traversed all ranges of feelings and emotions, and somehow pulled me in like I was actually there.
Ajay's acting was pure beauty today, no matter how many times you watch it, it's as though you can feel his desperation, grief and overwhelming love.
I'm exhausted after watching it 3 times...Too much to handle at one go...