Does girls go for bad guys.... - Page 5

👏 👏 👏 PJ great point there... you have touched the issue that happends to almost everyone in their lives and so maturely put together... I couldn't have said it better...just love to read ur posts... i really fall in love with way you see life adn ur analysis!!

Originally posted by: Minnie

       Puja,it is not about whether it worked out or not.It is about getting an opportunity to exercise that choice. It's true that whatever we are is what we choose. Whether what we choose is right or wrong is based largely on luck and the determination to work at something with both being equally important. I have seen girls who are lucky in love and they take pride in saying that if the guy was otherwise they would not have choosen him. I say that when we do fall in love,we seldom wait to find out whether he is right or wrong. It is after we fall that we find that out. These girls are lucky because their choice did not turn out to be a deceit ,say six months down the line !! I am lucky in love because my husband did not turn out to be a cad six months after I got married to him. Unfortunately I have seen a large chunk of those unlucky ones as well. My cousin's marriage would not have worked out if she had not really worked at it. She chose it and she is living it out and when today everything is settled,she has come out to be the winner.

   My personal view is that arranged marriages are always more successful than emotion based love marriages. However the question here is not that. The question is whether it is right to fall in love with the wrong guy. My pov is,do we really get to choose whom we do fall in love with ?????

   The second point is,when we do fall in love,then what?? My best friend chose to break up at her parent's insistence, married a guy of their choice who was a very nice and yet was divorced 5 years later. Why and whereforth is immaterial. Today she has a kid and is single and wonders what it would have been like if she had stuck to her choice. Maybe she would have failed but then the choice would have been her's and sometimes it makes me think she definitely would have tried harder to save a marriage of her own choice. There are girls who stick to their decision because they made it in the frist place and there are others who don't think twice before dumping the person and moving on. That is when the matter of choice comes in. I think while falling in love cannot be controlled,the decision to stick to it can be. Having said that, I don't think we can ever predict that all the carefully weighed decisions will ultimately turn out to be right.

        In context of Jassi, I do think she decided to move on. That she is unable to stop loving Armaan does show the depth of her emotions. I think I respect her more for it because it would have been so easy for anyone to go for a greener pasture and that in case is Purab. Jassi can be everything we blame her for, but fickle and opportunistic she is not. She is human and has many failings but this is where I can still relate to her.

Minnie, I agree with you upto certain extend, but not 100%. First of all arrange marriages are more succesful because I guess there is no expectations. I had an arrange marriage and I did not know much about person I was getting married to specially teprament and stuff.. so when you dont know what to expect you tend to be more flexible.... you try and set your mind to work out this relation with all the hard work no matter what... unless in my case my husband is a gem and i really didn't have to work hard to have good married life.

About your friend, I personally think that going with arrange marriage though insisted by parents was "her own" choice. I was also in similar situation, and now I think that no one can push you to marry someone you dont want to. To me my family has always been first than my love. So if the moment you say "yes" to your family's choice that day you have made "your" decision. I dont think one should regret for that later on.....If my parents insisted me to have an arrange marriage, they didn't push me to the "mandap"... I agreed with them .... that means it is my decision to get married to their choice. I could have gone against them !!

well said bgdesai.....also falling in love and acting on it are two different things. if one does not act, love tends to fade. if you are acting on it , then you have to decide what role brain and heart are going to play in ur life.

wow u guys...
everyone here are so mature..speically in this topic...
i must say ..everyone has an excellent point of view

but most commen thing is..when we do fall in love we all learn to accept the bad and good part of that person..we learn to know everyone is different and they are just the way they are...we learn to love them even more..

i have to bring out one other point..i have seen and experienced this myself..
that when 2 same ppl are tied to each other..either by love or by fate..things dont work out at all...
when 2 same ppl decide to live their life with each other..both of them dont know how to live the next moment..
i mean both of them dont know how to handle thier egos or thier anger..both of them cant secrifice nething for neone..and mostly...IITS BORRING TO LIVE WITH UR SHADOW..

NEWAYS..good points everyone..

Hum dil ki shehzadi hai marzi ki malika...
sir pe aanchal kyoon rakhe dhalka to dhalka..

Emma i liked your foot note... 😆   😆 really cool one!!

Hi this is a nice topic.

And d_d, you remind me of myself some ten year back. I definitely thought I am above men and their love and wouldn't have anything to do with them, Until I met him. Then I didn't know what hit me............... For that matter I still don't know😆 

Frankly speeking I don't remember analysing whether he is a volcano or ditchwater................... It all happened just like that. Love follows no logic and brain has nothing to do with it. I personally believe that falling in love is a gift from God. If you are not experiencing it your life is not worthwhile.

 

Ps: He was and is and will continue to be a Volcano and I still love him😉

I think when love has to happen, it will happen. And whether the guy's good or bad won't be the issue of the day.

I think not all girls go after bad guys. It depends on what kinda guy a girl wants, to an extent. When you love, you the whole the whole person, not just the good side or the bad side.

As for me, I'm obssessed with a guy who's playing on his way to become one of the world's most super-evil characters 😆 because even though the character will become bad, right now he's good, and he really values love and friendship, though his reputation throughout his town is nothing close to good.

Man, I wish I had the time to read all the posts and follow this more carefully. I seemed to have missed the bandwagon on this topic! Anyways from what I read I think this was a very good topic and great discussions so far! puja you never fail to stump me with the maturity in your writing!

As far as what i understood from the posts, one of the arguments was regarding your personal intervention in the matter of love and I have to agree with puja and lakshmi_maruthi in that I think that we do have some sort of control in who we fall in love with. Agreed that love just happens but it doesn't just happen with anyone and everyone is what i personally think. I feel that we have some preconceived notion of who we might be potentially attracted to and with a bit of leeway we tend to fall in love with that sort of a person. In some cases it could be personal or social restrictions which govern who we fall in love with. I know I can never love someone my parents wouldn't approve of....it's absolutely unthinkable in my case. But in some others (the rebels) they would absolutely want to fall in love with someone whom their parents would not approve of at any cost. Nevertheless there might be some control in the sort of person you might fall in love with although it might not translate to the EXACT person you fall in love with!

Originally posted by: lub_u

lets just say opposite attraction ( something i learnt in science class)...good gurlz go 4 bad boyz and bad gurlz go 4 nice, good kinda guyz. They always come with a fine printed criteria attached . Opposites attract ....(In case of certain like or almost equal  materials ) Eg: two magnetic poles,sexes of same species, magnet and iron ... (in case of varying qualities ) The characteristics are governed by the dominant item. Fire evaporate water , and water douses fire which ever is in larger quantity , but they do rarely attract . The point in the above case is here we have uptill now considered character with one or two minor differences like 1. one being timid and the other not (in appearance  ...). 2. one rich and another middle class. 3. one employer one employee . 4. one male and one female . 5. one crooked and one seedha sadha .  Even then we have not analysed more than 2 points together and to finalize the relation we had to permanently strike out 3 differences (1,3& 5). Good girls go for bad guys only in reels where it is generally funded by the mafia , to unlogoko bhi achcha dikhana chahiye naaaa , good girls and mafia made a villain cum hero. In real life it does not generally happen .You may choose a person with a smart mouth and a roving eye but not many choose a mate who has bedded quite a few, got you in trouble and cant defend you, how well may be the relation .Someone generally does it, if they  have a plan for themselves or is proved wrong by the soceity  . Also if you be a person of principles you wont naturally be attracted to one who has made a fun outta them . You are allowed to lose everything in love not your self respect . In real life one who blindly followes the media principles makes the mistake, mostly not ever to be rectified .

thanks bgdesai
even i love it too..but its not complete...i forgot the rest..hehe
😛