Originally posted by Opti
Thanks Diya for the excellent recap as usual. Was waiting for your weekly updates. Will post my views on the week's episodes in a while.Was hoping you would post here - have been missing your symbolism posts!
I too thought that story-wise last week was good. It had some unexpected twists like La accepting the reality of her situation and Arnav not only realising that he was not doing right by her but also coming forward to apologise for his behaviour and try to rectify the situation before it gets out of hand. I've always been harping that the Arnav should to bear his heart to La and make a clean break failing which La should slap him. Glad both did not give me cause to complain.
Of all the episodes of the week the one that struck me the most was December 14th.
This episode invited some of the strongest reactions of our forum members. Some did not like Arnav hug La, some did not like Khushi hide the truth from Anjali and some despised Anjali for her weak nature and her making mountains of mole hills (the mangalsutra snapping incident). Some had problems on all three counts I think. Anyway I felt this episode brought out the striking contrasts between the three women. If one has to sum up the episode, it was about three weak women and one strong man.
The episode starts where it left off the previous day, with Arnav confessing to La that he regretted hurting her but he did not do it deliberately. Here he lets Khushi's name slip making it clear to La that he was actually confessing to Khushi and not to her.
They say that when we are disturbed that we let out what we feel deep within as our guard is down. We need to go back in time to see what was Arnav's mental state when he made that inadvertent confession. Arnav has bee worrying about Khushi ever since she broke down in front of him near the pool. He knew the cause of her agony was her fiance. When he tried to trace her after she left so abruptly and she did not respond to his calls, he nearly lost his mind. So when she picked up the phone he demanded to know if she was all right. Khushi just brushed him aside, not explaining as to why she left so suddenly. (Many did not like what she did although I can fully empathise with her given all that she has been through in the last couple of hours or so and her dilemma about her future course of action.) I missed those reactions, but honestly ... Khushi really has far bigger problems to worry about than the blow-hot-blow-cold nature of Arnav right now. She has had her trust broken - yes, she didn't want to marry Shyam, but she was resigned to her fate, and at least she trusted him as a person ... she is completely shattered and numb right now - how to deal with the repurcussions of this huge discovery. Repurcussions not only for her - that's the least of her worries, but those on her family and on Anjali. If it had been an unknown man, easy as pie - go to his unknown wife and denounce the guy straight off as a twotimer and a cheat. But Shyam belongs to the family her sister is getting married into, and to the woman who has always treated her with so much affection and love... and she knows how much Anjali and her family love and respect Shyam. Right now she is just trying to digest the enormity of the whole problem, and trying desperately to believe Shyam, so that things can come back to normal. I think she would love to believe that his apology is genuine, and that he made a one time slip, because that would make things all right so much more easily ... but she knows deep within her that it isn't. And her inner conflict is because of this. She wants to believe Shyam but she can't.
Arnav realised that he has only himself to blame for Khushi's brusque attitude. He was the one who backed out after nearly kissing her. He was the one who announced his intention to get engaged to La in order to escape what he was feeling for Khushi which, in turn, prompted her to accept an engagement with another man. To cover up his frustration at being 'jilted' by her he was the one who kept rubbing it into her that she and her fiance cannot afford the goodies of life. So when her fiance did something to hurt her, why would she pour her sorrows to him?
If she was being brusque, he deserved it for he did not give her that confidence to come to him with her problems. It wouldn't be surprising if she did not tell him her problems because she feared that he would ridicule her for picking such a man to get married to. I suspect this was what was weighing on his mind when he attended the phone call, taking time to registered what was being said. His absent minded agreement on the phone to having a meeting on the very day he was getting engaged did not go unnoticed by his girl friend who demanded an explanation. Although he started off addressing her, mid way he lapsed into his thoughts and continued his conversation with Khushi who, though physically absent, was occupying every once of space in his mind. La did not need any further indication of what her place was in his life and after identifying herself to a lost Arnav, she gracefully leaves the place without waiting to hear him out. Arnav is understandably disturbed and for the first time acknowledges to himself that he wasn't doing right by her by leading her on like this. I agree, and I hope Arnav does introspect about how he has treated Khushi with as much depth as he introspected about La - or even more ... because he has done far worse with Khushi. And that apology was for Khushi ... maybe he is slowly realising that he has never really given her the space to come to him with her problems ... even though he never means to hurt her, but he realises now that he does, he HAS, he regrets it always, but his emotional confusion with her makes him react in ways that he later regrets. But for now, nope, I don't blame Khushi for not confiding in Arnav ... he has not really given her that confidence yet.
I guess I got carried away there and rambled more than I intended to. Anyway, let me come back to the point on the episode being about three weak women and one strong men.
Weak woman No.1: Anjali
- As you rightly pointed out Anjali's psyche has been shaped by her past tragedy of not only losing her parents but also being jilted at the alter and her present handicap. I can to some extent empathise with her because I had lost my father in an accident when I was merely four years old. To this day I fear if my loved ones return late. I especially fear for my hubby's safety every time he goes on a road trip alone. I have a morbid fear of driving and have not learnt to do so till date. Athough I am a strong modern woman, I still carry my mangalsutra in my handbag when I am not wearing it around my neck. Although I know my hubby's life is not hanging by it, I still feel more assured if it is somewhere close to me. Maybe I do not take my subconscious fears to the extent that Anjali does but then I can gauge where she is coming from. So when her mangalsutra snaps she immediately assumes the worst and fears for her husband's safety. She cannot imagine a life without him and lets Khushi know just how vulnerable she really is. Opti, I'm really sorry to hear that ... and I can understand - I have a friend who lost an uncle in an air crash, and since then she is morbidly afraid every time her husband flies ... I myself tell my husband to sms me as soon as he lands whenever he travels and I get really angry if he doesn't ... Anjali's fear is understandable because of her life experiences ... Arnav has expressed his fear about his Di leaving him, but Anjali has not said it in so many words - she expresses it every day in her overdone religious paath pooja and her over dependance on Shyam. Both brother and sister have reacted abnormally to the traumatic loss of their parents.
Anjali's weakness stems from her fear to know the truth
. Ignorance is bliss for her.
Weak woman No.2: Khushi
- Khushi is not normally a weak woman. In fact she is by far the strongest woman of the show but she too has her weaknesses. Her weakness is her tender heart which cannot see anyone unhappy and that too people who are closest to her. True to her name she always strives to bring happiness and not sorrow in the lives of people around her. Although she knew that truth is bitter and came determined to break it nonetheless for it was the right thing to do under the circumstances, she couldn't go through with it because she was weakened by Anjali's emotional outburst. As you rightly pointed out the truth will literally kill her. She also believes in signs and when she instinctively held the falling mangalsutra, she presumed that it was a sign from DM that she has to be the guardian of Anjali's wedded life. Once the truth is out, there is no guarantee for Shyam's life given the way Arnav feels about his sister and about her. A man who duped both the women closest to him is sure not getting away easily.
Khushi's weakness stems from her love for people and the need to see them happy. Knowledge is not power for her because she chooses not to use it. Beautifully said! and also her need to look for the best in people, to look past their mistakes and give them a second chance ... although her decision was determined to a large extent by Anjali's reactions, but Shyam expressed his remorse again and again and made no wrong moves, so she was giving both Shyam and Anjali's marriage another chance. And considering the number of times she has forgiven Arnav when he has behaved brutally with, this is definitely part of her character. Is it a weakness or a strength - depends on the type of person she is dealing with.
Weak woman No.3: Lavanya
- A woman who has turned her life around for the man she loves finds out that she is not the focus of his life, never has been and never will be. She knew all along that she wasn't getting a fair deal in this relationship and yet chose to turn a blind eye to it for fear of losing the man she loved. She was satisfied with so little he was offering till Khushi came and asked her to demand more. Even after he had announced their engagement, she never felt secure for he was always distant. She had accepted it because she thought he was a man who exhibited no emotion other than anger, but when she saw the strength of his emotions for another woman, she knew she had lost him even without actually gaining him. She couldn't come to terms with the reality and did not want him to say it out loud when he came to apologise to her and make a clean break. She begged him to maintain his silence as she tried to hide her grief by discussing about an engagement she knew wasn't happening.La's weakness stems from her inability to confront the truth after knowing it. Like Khushi, knowledge is not power for her, although for her it is not about choosing to not use it but about not being strong enough to make that decision. True and well said again! La is probably the weakest of the three in a way - Anjali at least has the excuse of a traumatic past, what excuse does La have? She is a very poor decision maker, and shies away from unpleasantness as much as Anjali does - first in terms of NOT enforcing her own opinions on Arnav, then accepting the lukewarm relationship she had with him, even though she recognised it was unsatisfactory, and finally not wanting to face facts when they stared her in the face. It was left to Arnav to make the final break.
I loved what they did with Arnav's character in this episode. The man who is normally emotionally weak, showed strength of character by coming forward to admit that he can never love her as she deserves to be loved. He knew he has used her as a pawn in his ego battle with Khushi and he needed to stop it before he hurts her more. His insistence to voice the truth even though she did not want to hear it helped her to accept the inevitable. Her plea for a hug stung at his conscience and he gave her a heart felt hug that he had never given her in all the months they were going steady. Drawing strength from that hug she decided to move on but pleaded that they hold back the announcement of their break up till Payash engagement is through. As you said La has really come a long way from the selfish girl she was and so has Arnav and both, thanks to Khushi. It is Khushi's sensitivity which has rubbed off these two.
Arnav's strength stems from his acceptance of the consequences of his actions. I would say he is starting to accept the consequences of his actions. He did that with Payal when he went out of his way to help the Payash alliance ... he took the onus of calling Khushi in the first place ... and now when realisation finally hit him as to how unfair he was being with La, he took action immediately on that. I am now waiting for the time when he will start making amends to Khushi, because the realisation that he has been unfair to her has well and truly begun. But maybe because his emotions are far more involved and entangled with Khushi, he is finding it more difficult there to make the right move - every move he makes, he backtracks two. What do you feel? But am with you - I like the way his character is evolving and the Prince is emerging slowly from the Beast.
Am waiting eagerly for the rest of your thoughts ...
(To be continued)