Good Morning.. And Merry Christmas.. So my Christmas present to you all.. Aham is coming home to his love .. THANK YOU SO MUCH.. Your comments were all fabulous and I am really grateful
"What was that about? You nearly had yourself arrested.. Bhai, I am talking to you.." Deepika questioned.
"How dare he? How dare he insult that poor girl like that.. Did he not see her fear? Just
because she could not say a word in her defense.. Did you see how much she was trembling and went on about her being illiterate.. How could he?.. So the girl could not read. .There
could be numerous reasons.. How dare he raise his hand on her. Does he even know how much that could affect the girl?" Aham was still fuming.. When he saw the young waitress trembling, he had seen Gopi in front of his eyes pleading in the same way..to him.. He saw himself,his words, his taunts and then.. Aham closed his eyes. "Oh my God Deepika.. That man does not know.. The consequences of what he is doing.. He is killing the girl's spirit. It will remain there for rest of his life.. He does not realize that when you look into the eyes of the person you wronged, you see
the result of your actions... You look into the depths and get to know how much you have put them through. You see fear reflect in those depths instead of happiness, fear seeing you, fear that they will be abused again... Oh God Deepu... Do you know how much it hurts? It hurts to see what they went through because of your mistakes. If it hurts you so much, just think of how much it would have hurt them..."
"Bhai.. You are making no sense.. What does this have to do with that waitress?.." Aham turned around and Deepu could see how affected he was.. "I put Gopi through that same thing Deepu. Gopi was illiterate when she married me.." Deepu sharply inhaled. Now things made sense. Aham Bhai's reluctance to talk about his marriage. Him being away from home for this long. His denial to talk about Bhabhi..
"Oh God Bhai. So that is why you are here alone.. I wondered. So you ran away.. Ran away because of your fear.." "I could not do anything else Deepu. What I did.. How will I ever change that?. I will always be reminded by the fear I see in Gopi's eyes.. "And you want to still remain selfish after all you have put Bhabhi through?" Deepu saw Aham look up as though he was struck. "Sorry Bhai. But you ran away leaving Bhabhi there because you feared to face the consequences of your actions. You are still hiding because of that fear. Not because you do not love Gopi Bhabhi.. You do love her. Don't you even dare to say no.. I see your eyes fill with love every time you take her name and you also know that she loves you back, but you are still making her suffer because of your fears. Bhai, don't make this fear blind you. And don't let go of something that is precious.. Go back bhai and tell Bhabhi how much you love her and miss her. Make it up to her for your past actions. Nobody can change what happened in the past. You were wrong or you were right.. It does not matter now." Deepika continued, "You told me just today Bhai that I should not run away from my feelings. I should not be afraid to face them and maybe give myself a second chance at love. Maybe you should yourself take a leaf out of what you said..." Saying, Deepika left Aham to battle his own demons.
"Deepu, I am leaving for India in the first flight tomorrow morning. Something came up.. I need to go there.. I am booking a ticket for you too. Please come home with me. You were right. And so was I. I will leave your ticket at the check in desk. I hope you make it.." Aham's voicemail left Deepika paralyzed. She thought back on their conversation and realized that whatever she told Aham was true. She also had to overcome her fears. Having decided, she immediately set to task.
"Maaji. We need to get the room cleaned. I need to remove the flower vase and place imitations in their place. He is allergic to the scent .And Maaji, I prayed that I would visit the temple on the day he came back. Can I go Maaji? I prayed for his safe return and project success. Kanhaji has been kind.." Gopi was listing out all she had to do before her husband returned. He had called her the night before to let her know that he would be arriving the next day. It had been sudden. But Gopi had been very happy to even question about it..
"So what if he considers me a friend. I love him and a dearer friend I could not have asked. I will hope that someday he does fall in love.. But till then I do not want this to affect what we already have.." Gopi had thought as soon as she heard he was coming back.
"Yes Gopi vahu.. I will let the driver know.." "Thanks Maaji. Then there are some old clothes I wanted to clear out. I will donate them to the temple office. They wanted some used clothes to distribute to the poor. Also, I need to get the sooji ready.. Ahamji likes Kheer. So maybe.. " "Gopi vahu.. If you do not breathe, how will you talk? Now beta.. Calm down.. We all will take care.." Kokila told her vahu fondly. She was pleased to see that Gopi was happy. "It seems Mota Bhabhi was right. Aham seems to have brought a change in her.. The girl who was so scared to even mention his name in our midst is now openly showing her eagerness at his return. Krishna Bhagawan.. I hope all goes well and our wishes come true.." Kokila thought..
The next morning Gopi got up early. She had been too excited the previous day to sleep and Panna had joined her excitement. She did not know what the future held.. But she had come to
trust her husband and had managed to fall in love more.. "Hey Kanhaji.. Don't let me falter. I want to make sure I do not embarrass him.." She thought as she got ready to go to the temple.
It was decided that Jigar and Kokila would pick up Aham at the airport. They started to the airport well before time. They did not want to miss Aham coming out. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jigar walked here and there in excitement while Kokila watched the announcement board impatiently. Then they saw Aham.. He was coming down the escalator by taking 2 steps at a
time. He came breathless in front of Kokila. "Jai Shree Krishna Mom.." He said. Kokila could see his eyes searching the airport.. He took her blessings turned around and hugged Jigar.. "Good to see you.. Now come with me here for a minute.." Kokila saw Aham drag Jigar a little way off. "Where is she? I told you to tell her what I said.. Did she not come?" Aham was desperate.
"Bhai. What did you expect? That Bhabhi would be here to welcome you and another girl you call your love. Bhai give her a break. She is human too. She left." "Jigar you are making no sense to Aham. He thought he would see Gopi as soon as reached. He wanted to explain to her and make her understand.. Desperately...
"Why would she do this now when I am telling her that I am in love. She stayed when I wasn't in love or told her I wasn't. So why does she want to leave now when I am telling her that I do love
her.. Does she not love me?. I was sure she did.." "Bhai.. Bhai.. Stop. If I understand correctly. You are in love with Bhabhi. with GOPI Bhabhi?" "Of course.. Who else can I be in love with?" Aham's voice sounded irritated. "I told her I loved her but she seems to be angry at me for something.. Maybe I took so long that she has give up on me.. You need to help me now.. Tell me where she went. I need to stop her." "Sorry Bhai. I won't tell you" "WHAT? JIGAR. TELL ME WHERE GOPI IS NOW." "Bhai. Don't shout. You heard me, right? You dug your own grave now you have to come out of it on your own." "What?" "You told Bhabhi over phone yesterday that you have realized that you were in love and that you were coming home. So we all assumed as did she that you found somebody else. You broke Bhabhi's heart again Bhai." "Jigar.. I did not mean to. I meant I loved her.." "Well you did keep saying till now that you can never love Bhabhi so we assumed that you found your love in some one else. Bhabhi asked Kaki to welcome you with your love and said she now had to take her leave." "So you guys let her go?" "Come on bhai.. You moved on... So we thought we should let her move on too. She needs to find her happiness. She will too with somebody who loves and cares for her. Now Bhai.. BHAI. What did I say? You look like something has fallen on your head." "Jigar just tell me where Gopi went. Please.." Jigar saw that Aham could not continue after that. He looked like he was in pain. Jigar could not take that anymore. "Bhai. She said she wanted to go to the temple before..."
Jigar smiled as he saw Aham running at break neck speed towards the car taking the keys with him. "Well that went as planned." "Yes Jigar. You did very well." His Kokila Kaki smiled as she walked towards him. "He needs to have his own heart ache before he gets what he wants. And it is good that we brought 2 cars" Both thought back to the call that started al this drama.
"What. You are coming back day after. Ahamji really?" Bhabhi had been excited and so had he
been... He had snatched the phone from Bhabhi and before he could talk he heard Aham say.. "And I am coming back Gopi, with my love. You will be there when I come back. Won't you? I want to see you first thing Gopi..." And an idea had flashed in Jigar's mind. The thought that Aham could have fallen in love with anybody except his bhabhi never entered Jigar's mind. He had silently walked out of the room as Gopi Bhabhi had excitedly talked to the others.
"Bhai. What did you just say. Gopi Bhabhi gave me the phone and she left. Her face was so sad.." Jigar had heard Aham's silence and he heard him say "Jigar just get Gopi back on line.. No wait.. Tell her that I will explain everything. Tell her that all I am asking her to do is wait for me.. Ok. Don't forget." He heard Aham say. There was a catch in his brother's voice. Jigar had been about to melt and let the cat out of the bag, when he saw his Kaki nod her head No. So he had finished his conversation assuring Aham he would inform Gopi.
"He has finally understood, hasn't he?" Kaki had asked. "Yes Kaki. Poor Bhai. He thought Bhabhi heard his confession and I think.." "You gave him the idea that she did not like it.." "I may have.. a bit.." "I like it.. Good going Jigar." Kokila appreciated the surprised Jigar.
"You had us dance to your tunes till now Aham. Now dance a little to ours.." Kokila thought as her son raced the car towards the temple to stop his love. "Kaki I think I need to run now. If Bhai finds out.." "He will just thank you Jigar.. In the long run.." Kaki assured him. "Surprises never seize to happen in Modi Bhavan." Jigar thought
Aham's thoughts were running berserk. He had thought that Gopi had not been happy about his love for her. But now it seemed she had misunderstood him. "Oh God.. What did I do again? I
am plain stupid. Could I not have just said I love you to her? No.. I am coming home with my love... Stupid .. idiot.." He scolded himself as he tried to catch up with his wife.
"I will let her know Bhai. Yes and bring her to the airport. Bye." Aham heard Jigar say.
"Gopi became sad when I told her I love her?" Aham thought. "What have I done? Have I killed the love she felt for me. Am I too late?" This thought had shattered Aham to pieces. He wound up his work, he was right at the end anyway and He could not wait for the flight to land. He wanted.. needed to look at his wife and let her know that he had come to his senses. "Gopi don't give up on me now. Please.." He had pleaded mentally to her countless times in the last 20 hours. He knew that if Gopi had given up, it was just his fault. He had been so callous. He had no excuse. Aham thought back on every little thing he had done. He had hurt her intentionally and unintentionally. "What right do I have to ask her to forgive me? If she has found her happiness without me then I will not stop her." He would think defeated one minute."She cannot do this to me. I will not let her go. Let her hate me and torture me or punish me any way she wants but she cannot leave me.." Aham's thoughts pulled him to both extremes and he felt himself drowning in sorrow. He hated himself for being an arrogant fool. Most of all he hated himself for being an idiot even after he had realized his love. "If not for my hate, she should leave me for treating her callously." He thought resignedly.
Whatever happened Aham knew one thing clearly. Deepika had been right. He had no time to waste. Life may not give him any more chances. Aham knew that even if Gopi refused to forgive him, he knew he would not love anybody else again. He would fight to make her happy like she had fought to make him happy. But he would not give up without fighting at least once to get back his love. He was determined to talk to Gopi.
Aham's mind raced as he ran after Gopi. He could see her with a bag moving slowly towards
the temple and had parked the car nearby.
"Gopi.." Gopi heard her Ahamji shout. She suddenly felt an arm pull her and turn her around and an out of breath voice continue.. "Gopi... Don't leave. I know I am too late but let me explain. Give me one chance. You cannot do this. Not now.. Not after I told you I am in love. It is all a misunderstanding..." "Ahamji calm down. What is it? Why are you running? And what did you just say.." Aham had continued talking as Gopi was trying to make sense of his words.. She listened carefully. Her Ahamji seemed to be in very great distress.
"...All this time you have said yes without asking any questions to me and I thought that was what you wanted. If you had just once ranted and raved about how unworthy I was of your love.." "Gopi... I... I would have felt a sense of relief. But you never did ask. Never once!!!" Aham paused to look at his wife. She had a look of confusion on her face. "You did not confront me even after I told you I would like to be your friend. Did you think that I was not even worthy of your hate Gopi?" Aham asked.
Gopi was flabbergasted. "Ahamji.. I do not understand.. Why would I hate you? I love.." Gopi did not continue.. Aham's face changed. He looked angry. "See this is what I am talking about Gopi. You do not tell me what you think, feel or want, even now. You accept everything I say without question even if it means you will be hurt. And I do not know if I am the right person for you. I am frightened that all I do is hurt you. Hurt you with my words, actions and feelings. I will never really
know Gopi if you are hurt or not. How will I? You hide yourself so well. How will I be able to make you happy Gopi? Ever. I do not know how. And you deserve so much better." Aham was breaking inside. Doubts assailed him again..
He had been wrong. He should have just waited and stayed out for her sake. He should have not come back. He should have let her move on in life. He had become selfish. Again.
"Really Ahamji. You do not know how I feel?" Gopi broke the silence between them. "No I don't. Not about the important things altleast." Aham mumbled when she raised her eyebrows "So you do not know that I love you?" Gopi asked. Her heart was bubbling with joy that her husband at last was in love and with HER. She could see it in his eyes clearly now. However he was just being a little Ahamish.. "No I don't." Aham maintained childishly. "How will I know. You never told me once." "Well you did not ask." "I thought you would deny it and would tell me to get lost." "I would not have. And you know it. You were actually just frightened to see what was in front of you. And you chickened out. Accept it Ahamji" Gopi was surprised herself. She had indeed learned to become his true equal.
Aham's face was worth watching. His expression changed from being angry to relief to bliss when she had mentioned love to fretful to surprise and then naughty in a matter of seconds.
"Did you just say I was a chicken?" Aham asked trying to sound stern but failing miserably. "But tell me Gopi.. Do you still love me? No wait.. Before you answer that, I want to tell you that I love you. I love you with my heart and soul. I have loved you for quite some time now. But was a fool. I did not want to acknowledge it not because of you but because I did not feel I was worthy enough. I was frightened Gopi.." He added seriously. "Frightened of your love and its power of forgiveness. Frightened that you may leave me. Frightened that my past would catch up with us and one day you would feel you have had enough of me. Because Gopi, If you ever leave me I do not know if I can survive. So I would like.. No.. I beg you to overlook my mistakes and accept me and my love. I know that I am unworthy but I will try my best to be the person you deserve. Please.."
"But why now Ahemji? After all this time. You yourself told me remember. I am just a friend. No more No less. So what has changed now? I haven't changed. I am still Gopi..." Gopi
wanted to know clearly what had changed him now.
Ahem heard his wife and his heart cried on hearing her questions. All he wanted was to go
back to that day when his mother asked him to accept his love. He now knew that he was in love even then. But he had been a stubborn fool. Now his foolhardiness was making him lose everything of value in his life. But he could not let it go without a try. Not without one try.. He would convince her..
"Nothing changed Gopi. You are right. You are still the same. The same Gopi.. My Gopi.. I haven't changed either. I am still the same Aham who gets angry every 2 minutes. the Aham who is slow and stupid in matters of the heart. But even the slowest person reaches the finish line some time Gopi. I am sorry that I was slow but that is how I am.. But now I know Gopi. I love you. You were always perfect. Perfect wife. Perfect bahu, sister, Bhabhi, beti and friend. Yes Gopi. You are a perfect friend too. I love you because you are who you are. If I am not open with my feelings, you are not open about voicing your hurt Gopi and I may be one of the reasons for that. But when I woke up,actually woke up to what I felt, I found that I had hidden my feelings from myself too. Do you think I do not know that you love me? I do Gopi.. I do in my heart.. And I will tell you that I love you back With all my heart... No.. Don't ask anything yet.. I haven't finished. " He said when Gopi tried to talk. "Gopi when you were hurt in the hospital, I was totally devastated. The only thought I had in mind was that you should get back to me safe and sound and you did. After that I felt
guilty that you had suffered because of me. I named it to humanity and concern when I took care of you. I never stopped to think.. Would I have felt the same for someone else? Because I did not want to. The answer was too complicated. Then when Kinjal's and Rashi's doings came out I was more angry . I was angry at Kinjal, at Rashi and most of all at myself. You thought it was just anger that I had been made a fool. But I was more frightened that day than any other day in my life. Afraid that I had been stupid and an idiot. When I saw the fear return to your eyes that day Gopi, I think I freaked out. Because I knew you would leave me. I was afraid that I had lost you somehow by doing what I did to you. But you never changed gopi. You remained the same. You forgave me and the others like you always do. That shook me and also frightened me. I was frightened of your love and of how much you loved me.. I was afraid that I would never match your love Gopi and that you would find me inadequate. You would always be my Gopi and I would just be Aham. And one day you will leave me because of my imperfections. So I took the easier route. I made you my friend Gopi. I was selfish. I did not want to let you go. But I was not also ready to forgive myself nor was I ready to accept that I loved you. I now know that I was wrong Gopi. Because I made you suffer more. Didn't I? But this time it was not intentional Gopi. I thought I was protecting you. Do you believe that Gopi? Please do.. Don't tell me I am too late now.. I beg you. Stay with me.. And give me one more chance. Let me try. Please...
"Ahemji, I.." "No Gopi.. Let me finish." Aham desperately wanted to put his point across.. To make Gopi understand. "You changed my fear Gopi. By being there without conditions without expectations. Everytime I look at you I see my future in your eyes. I know now Gopi that I cannot ever measure up to you but I also know now that you would never expect it of me. I now know Gopi that love is not about accepting the good in the person but it is about accepting the person with all their faults. You taught me that love is not about the happiness we share but it the the feeling that the person is there for you even when you are at your lowest. Love is not about the gifts we exchange but the thoughts and feeling that go along with it. You taught me all this GOpi with your patience and love. Yes Gopi with love. You ask me what changed. Nothing changed. I just lifted the veil of fear from my eyes. I lifted the veil of fear and I now know. I do not fear to accept that Love you. Just be there for me Gopi. This last time .. And I will.. "
"Ahemji please stop." Gopi said. Ahem looked at Gopi afraid to see if his explantions had made sense because even to his own ears they came up short for all the mistakes he had made. But he had to try stop his wife and love from leaving. "Can I talk now?" Gopi asked. Aham just nodded. Gopi looked at Koki who had walked up to them and smiled. Kokila had a look of satisfaction on her face. "You are right Ahemji. You are too slow in the matters of heart. But I love you as you are because you are also the sweetest person I know on earth. Yes Ahamji" She continued when she saw a look on surprise on her beloved's face. "You have now given me everything I wanted. Your love. But before love you gave me a lot more than you give yourself credit for. Do you know, you were the first person who listened to me.. Really listened to me.. And you let me be me... How can I forget Ahamji that you made my dream come true. My biggest dream, to study. Do you think any one else would have done that for me? And you were also my first friend. I do not have any other like you. When I was young Ahamji, I dreamed of having somebody to share my thoughts, happiness and sadness with. You became my friend and made that dream come true. You tell me that I was a perfect friend. But to me you were more than that. You gave me respect and trust Ahamji. You made me your equal. And most of all, you gave this orphan a family to love and be loved. How can you say you were are imperfect? You were the answer to my prayers. So please Ahamji stop blaming yourself. You told me once remember. There should be no thanks or sorry among friends. There is no place for them in love either Ahamji." Gopi finished. Her heart was full.
"So you believe me? That I do love you. You believe me right?" Aham wanted to confirm. He did not understand what was happening and had to make sure he had heard right. Gopi just nodded smiled "Coming to that.. Even Panna knew before you or I did Ahemji. So please don't apologize anymore. I am as much a slow a learner as you are.." Aham laughed aloud holding on to Gopi."We are imperfectly Perfect.Now you cannot leave me. ever" Aham said getting the bag out of Gopi's hand. "Ji.. Woh.. We need to give the bag to the temple office. They have the new clothes we want distributed to the poor. For your safe return Ahamji." Gopi explained. She did not know why Aham was looking at her confused. "So this is not your bag. You were not leaving?.." Before Aham could say more.
"Its time for the pooja. Come on Gopi." Kokila pulled Gopi's hand and took her with her. "You too Aham" She said and laughed silently as she saw her son finally joining the missing pieces of
the puzzle. Gopi immediately let go of Aham's hand and started towards the temple. She suddenly turned around and simply mouthed "I love you Ahamji".
Aham stopped in his tracks and then a huge smile broke out."It seems the clouds have cleared Bhai. Thank god!" said Jigar as he joined his brother. "Yes they have Jigar. They have.." Aham repeated and looked at his wife. He still had a big grin on his face and he saw his mother kiss Gopi on the forehead and bless her. "It was not just love Ahamji..." Gopi's words echoed in his ears again. It was not just love.. It was more than that.. And Aham would remember that till his last breath. And don't think that I will let you go that easily." Aham added as he felt Jigar relax
seeing him smile. "I will exact my revenge on you my brother!! Very soon.." Aham laughed. "Jigar is going to get his due very soon." Aham thought amused. He had brought Deepika home
with him. Jigar needed to become his carefree brother again and somehow Aham knew he had
made the right choice.
The bell struck and Aham thanked God for giving him the most wonderful gift. His family and the girl who bound them all together. It was his wife's birthday!!!
"By the way Jigar.. Did you pick up my guest? You forgot. I expected so. Can you now please bring them home? I will take care of Mom and Gopi.. Now Go.." Aham said as Jigar looked at him guiltily. "Sorry Bhai.. Here.. I am gone.." Jigar ran back to the car. If her had turned around he would have seen Aham smile fondly at him and would have understood something was up..
Deepika was fuming at the airport. She was surrounded by suitcases, both hers and Aham's.
"I will kill Aham Bhai..No.. That Jigar.. Let him come.."
A slightly big update.. But I needed to stop at a right point.. Jigar and Deepu meet in the next update..
Comments and Feedback..
Edited by Justlikethat1 - 25 December 2011 at 8:40am