Hello lovelies, love you all. 5 pages of awesome blossom comments, a treat for me. And thanks for appreciating my work. Really keeps me going. Bit down with col, and tired, well send out the pms tomorrow early morning. A bit frustrating, because I am down with fever too😆
Have a pleasant read.
1. Guilty
Days followed on. The dark figure would give his horrifying glimpse everyday. Day be day, his appearance grew wild, fierce, hungry. I would hyperventilate, I would gasp, take deep breaths frequently, I grew furious during the night time. And, to my hard cheese, he was oblivious to it. He would pay no heed whenever I would mumble to myself, or sometimes if my dry eyes would shed a drop of tear.
That morning, I sat on the bed, my legs folded, under the blanket, crippled. I was down with fever. And why it wouldn't be? I would wake up each cold night, and wander aimlessly in the pool side. It was sure I would catch cold. Anjaliji requested him to say at home, he shot me dirty looks for that. He sat as far as he could, as far as the bed would allow, sitting stiffly, scrolling through the gone damn thing. He neither bothered to look at me, nor did I. I wasn't going to be his rag doll, for no reason. He would stay away from me, be it.
The last words made me flinch. He always preferred to keep away from me. Yet, I found the most serene pleasure in his presence. It wasn't hard to deny that one can easily love him; despite he kept himself beyond his boundaries. Falling for him, I signed. I was being hopeful for no reason. I closed my eyes, letting the odd feeling churn within my heart, listening to the musical rhythm of the keys he typed. Nice, I find his typing rhythmic too.
The horrible shadow dawned my eyes, the dark eyes boring into me, settling the hands on my shoulder. I opened my eyes suddenly, scared, and saw him sitting as peacefully, like I had seen. I felt frustrated. I wanted to close my eyes and settle on the bed peacefully, whom to tell I couldn't.
'Di said you should take a walk nearby, with her,' he added the last words carefully, clearly signifying not with him. I tried to find a laconic answer to it, only to be shocked by his second set of words. 'Jijaji says he can take you to the doctor nearby after the walk, I think you three should go.' I gritted my teeth at his ludicrous statement, how irresponsible a man can get. 'I prefer staying at home.' I spoke, pauperizing his mood.
'I didn't ask for your choice, I said you have to go,' he looked at me with those deep black eyes, casting displeasure. 'I said, I won't go' I mustered all my courage which I would save for using in frenzy times like this, unknowingly shivering within my frame.
'You are impossible! We, are trying to help you out and you are being ungrateful! You still have the audacity to talk to me like that, you are'' he threw his file hard on the bed, shutting his laptop with omnipotence, dashing out of the room. The words echoed the room, "ungrateful" , I would rather die than be so catatonic to his harsh words. I felt like screaming my head off at him, shouting at him till my anger cooled down. I felt a strong urge to grab him and say it wasn't me who is being ungrateful, it's his vile brother.
My head felt heavy at the sudden violence, and crashed against the pillow, my eyes open.
I was fighting
But I just feel too tired
to be fighting,
guess I'm not the fighting kind.
I went deeper and deeper down the water. The lovely hues of blue, the alluring blend of green weeds, I felt like a soft feather. The deep sea green, two or three small fishes roaming around, I could hear them giggling and murmuring to themselves, blissful to the sea. A dark figure came rushing, gliding through the water and taking me under his grip. I tried to struggle through the water, pushing him as hard as I could. I started taking deep breaths and choked midway, the water blocked the nasal canals, and suddenly I felt a transformation in me, till now I could breath, and then I choked down. I gasped for some air, and looked into his eyes. No, it wasn't the one I expected.. it was Arnav. He held me close to his chest, perfectly still on the rush of water. He looked at me with his deep black eyes, now calm, trying to make me still against the current. I gasped for some air'.and suddenly I felt him pressing his lips to mine, and I was relived.
The dream broke. I jerked my head, and sat straight. The faint ray of sun was burning my skin. He wasn't there in the room, his file still placed carefully near the blanket. I traced my lips, I couldn't believe I had a soft small smile hung on them.
I tried to get up to shut the curtains, and stopped to look near the pool. He was caressing a few photos with utter pleasure in his eyes, a smile playing on his perfectly curved lips. I turned back, shutting the curtains slowly, and laid on the bed again. 'Khana khake sona Khusi,' I heard him say, making his way into the room. 'Mujhe bhook nahi hain,' I sharply threw back.
'Once again, I said you have to eat, I didn't give you any choices,' he bluntly replied, shuffling through his cupboard. 'And you heard me, I said what I meant.' His eyes grew furious at that, he looked at me, eyes wide in disbelief. I looked the other way, if only I had the courage to stand upto him and bore in his eyes, my life would have been much better.
'You are trying my patience.' He gave me a bewildered look with his brusque answer. 'You are stealing my words.' I shot back again. He twitched her brows and threw the suit on the bed he had just picked up. 'You wanna stay hungry, do that, I don't give a damn. It surprises me to how you can speak like that, even though I had done such a big favor to you. You must be pleased that you got what you wanted, aren't you?' he paused, 'A gold digger that you are.' He added. I could feel my eyes brimming up, to my annoyance, I found myself hiding below the blanket, crumpled because of the cold. He shut the door with a loud bang, and my eyes poured up.
Letting my tears wash away, letting all my frustrations out. I shivered when the cold drops fell on my hands, I wiped them off. The blanket covered my face, I hid from him, I wished for him, if he was near, I yearned for him. I wanted to say, I love you Arnav;still.
* *
I picked up the spoon and tried to push it in my mouth, forcefully, to say that she didn't matter to me. I tried to close my eyes and eat, I couldn't. I gulped each time, losing my eyes to see her angelic face appear, smiling, beaming at me. I would do anything to fetch that back, but I couldn't, and it was my fault every time. I wanted to gather her in my arms, assure her that I will always there for her, and each time, I put the barriers of lies between us. I was frustrated being one who I am not. I wanted to let her know what I felt, I couldn't. I pushed the dish plate, rather forcefully. Your wife is ill, and you idiot sitting down eating your food, go to her damn it!
I opened the door, and went past the bed, and sat beside the bed. She didn't move, neither she responded verbally. I removed the blanket, to see her beautiful face, shivering in cold, the hand clutching the blanket as if her life depended on it. I brushed my hand against her head, my eyes welled up. She was burning, and her cheeks strained with tear shouted that I was the reason behind it.
~
I moved to her side, carefully placing the bowl of hot water and the cloth, keeping it on her forehead. Tucking her curls aside, I let my eyes see her, intently. I was being unfair, who's not a single part she deserved. I switched the light off, letting in the duvet and closing my eyes, only to see her beaming smile. I am the sole reason of what she is today.
~
It wasn't late when I felt she snuggled inside my duvet, holding me close to her, placing her hand on my chest. After a lot of hesitation, I took her and placed her on my stretched hand, pulling her closer. She mumbled something under her breath, frowning. I kept running my hand through her hair, till we both dozed of to sleep.
Edited by -Murphy369- - 11 years ago
