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Yeh Shahar Hai Aman Ka...RTMC FF (Page 7)

Patrarekha IF-Sizzlerz
Patrarekha
Patrarekha

Joined: 14 July 2010
Posts: 14203

Posted: 18 December 2011 at 10:48am | IP Logged
Originally posted by bengalscott

The development of the story is too good. But too much narrative. Why don't you add more dialogues to make it more easy to get into? I mean give the readers a comfort zone; don't make them go through those lines you have written, rather draw the whole thing before their eyes. Visualise and paint the canvas for us with your story.

Characters are strong but they are too static. Move them, play with them. You can do it Aru. It's just a matter of creativity. Just do it...for us...or better still for me, coz I love your writing style.




and i love your criticism style...haha will surely consider your suggestion ..thanks for commenting

and thanks everyone for commenting and liking my ff

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bengalscott

bengalscott Groupbie
bengalscott
bengalscott

Joined: 15 September 2011
Posts: 180

Posted: 18 December 2011 at 10:52am | IP Logged
Originally posted by arunitachandra



and i love your criticism style...haha will surely consider your suggestion ..thanks for commenting

and thanks everyone for commenting and liking my ff


Ha ha! Criticism is not the word. I'd say it as a Critical Appreciation.

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Patrarekha

prahelika Senior Member
prahelika
prahelika

Joined: 13 December 2011
Posts: 901

Posted: 18 December 2011 at 11:41am | IP Logged
Hi di...now commenting again after ur 2nd edition of part2...thank god at least there is sumthing about suhan too Big smile ...luv d way pallavi imagined suhan as d personification of himalaya in her subconcious mind Big smile

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Patrarekha

justjayati Goldie
justjayati
justjayati

Joined: 21 September 2011
Posts: 1729

Posted: 18 December 2011 at 12:57pm | IP Logged
AWESOME PART YAAR!!! UPDT SOON...
Manipadma Senior Member
Manipadma
Manipadma

Joined: 17 February 2011
Posts: 953

Posted: 18 December 2011 at 7:44pm | IP Logged
Day Dreaming Day Dreaming Day Dreaming dnt get confused...this is me after reading the last scene Big smile...m losttt Tongue...n dnt u dare to change ur writing style...i justtt loooveee my writerr... U know.. u literally draggg ur reader in to himaliyan beauty...when i start reading this update i was at my home...bt the time i finish ... i was there wid paali.. all lost... ...   Day Dreaming

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Patrarekha

swethasyam08 IF-Rockerz
swethasyam08
swethasyam08

Joined: 15 June 2011
Posts: 8762

Posted: 18 December 2011 at 8:52pm | IP Logged
too good and awesome update Aru!!!!

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Patrarekha

anu93 IF-Sizzlerz
anu93
anu93

Joined: 07 August 2010
Posts: 16092

Posted: 20 December 2011 at 3:54am | IP Logged
Nice update AruThumbs Up

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Patrarekha

sweetsanyo IF-Dazzler
sweetsanyo
sweetsanyo

Joined: 05 April 2010
Posts: 4262

Posted: 20 December 2011 at 11:48am | IP Logged
dis story is really lovely ...

plzzz add me to ur pm list 


ud soon...

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Patrarekha

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