Ek Hazaaron Mein Meri Behna Hain

   

Do u have the key to my heart?Impo note pg:19

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Piya.D

Goldie

Piya.D

Joined: 24 November 2011

Posts: 1799

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 7:04pm | IP Logged
hi guys this is my first time writing in india forums and it's kind of scary because i really don't want anyone hurting m feelings and anyways if any of u have idea of how i can improve in my work plz be kind and tell me!!HERE GOES NOTHING!!!Wink
 
CHAPTER 1 !!
 
Virat came running out of the mehndi ceremony into the parking lot he was really shocked how could he sing agian after he had made a vow(promise) never to sing again.He blamed Maanvi for all this.It's all her Fault he thought as he stood angry in the parking lot.
Maanvi seeing that Virat was hurt for some reason decided to go after him but before leaving she told her jeevika di that she was going for a moonlight walk close by.
 
Jeevika:Maanvi where are you going?
Maanvi:di i'm going out for a walk i'm not feeling good!!
Jeevika:should i call the doctor?
Maanvi:Nooo di i'm ok i just need fresh air don't worry about me i'll be back soon just tell everyone i was tired that's why i went to sleep.And don't wait for me ok!!
Jeevika:ok i won't wait for u but plz take ur keys and cell phone and call me if u have any trouble ok mannu!!
Maanvi:ok di bye
Jeevika:ok bye
 
THAT took long Maanvi said to herself as she ran outside to the parking lot but virat was no where to be seen.Maanvi decided to go look for him since his car was still in the parking lot
"I Don't think that Chep is stupid enough to walk home" maanvi whispered to herself.
AS maanvi kept on walking at a side she saw him looking up at the stars and the moon as he was finding answers to questions that maanvi did not know.
Maanvi:what are u doing here chep?You know how worried i was,i mean ur family members were!WHAT HAPPENED?WILL U TALK!!
Viraat:maanvi plz leave before i lose my temper!
Maanvi:noo!! Virat i will not leave u alone, that is not why i came here.I came here because i wanted to see if u were ok!
 
(maanvi could not belive what she said why would she tell him that she cared about him in a way)
Viraat was just staring at her and wondering since when does she care!!
AND Then maanvi quickly changed to the topic
Maanvi:u sing very well u should sing often
That was when virat had enough of her he could not take it anymore
Viraat:that is it maanvi just Shut up!!Did u not hear me the first time just leave me alone!!!!!!
Doo u not understand?maanvi Leave NOW!!!!!
Maanvi was just shocked at the tone viraat used on her not even beeji ever spoke in that tone with her
Maanvi:umm im...
Viraat:SHUT UP MAANVI JUST LISTEN TO ME!!DO u even realize what u do or say can hurt anthour person?
wait let me answer that Noo u don't!! all u care about is u and ur stupid ego i can not belive someone like jeevika bhabhi is realted to a brat like u!Why the hell...It's all ur falut that i sang in there
Maanvi:i'm Sorry..i did not..
maanvi ran back to the guest house crying while viraat's words kept spining around inside her head
Viraat shocked at what he just said tried running after her but she was already gone he frogot about everything all he cared was about that he made maanvi cry.
Mean while maanvi ran inside the house and went start to bathroom to  watch her face just in case jeevika di was awake.As she went to her room jeevika was not there, maanvi went in to beeji's room and jeevika was sleeping with beeji.atleast i won't have to fake a smile in front of di thought maanvi
Virat also came back to the parking lot he thought of talking with maanvi at sangeet function.He got in his car and he went home where everyone was waiting for him ignoiring them he went upstairs to his room leaving swamini bua and dadaji angry.
 
It was 12:45 am
still maanvi and viraat were not asleep they were thinking about each other
Maanvi:why does it hurt so much even beeji says stuff like this why does it hurt more when virat said it?I'm really that bad?Does viraat hate me?More importently why do i care?Thats it im not talking to my chep i mean that chep
tought maanvi.
viraat could not take it anymore he deicded to call maanvi
maanvi hears her phone ringing and she knew it would viraat soo she does not pick up after 10 miss calls viraat calls again and maanvi picks up this time!
Maanvi:what is ur damn problem?if i'm not picking up that means i don't want to talk to u
Viraat:im sorry maanvi i did not mean too...
Maanvi:i don't care i hate u don't ever talk to me agian
and then maanvi hangs up
viraat heart broken can not go to sleep all night on the other hand maanvi can since she felt light yelling at virat
 
plz do comment and plz press like and i'll be updateing soon and also sorry about the spelling mistakes!Smile
 
part 2(little info abut next part)
viraat will try to find ways to meet maanvi but will get into stick situtions
and u may be expecting a new entery maanvi's childhood friends prem and heer
HEER will be known as maanvi's best friend and Prem will be also maanvi's really clos close friend
prem likes heer, heer likes prem too but she's scared to tell him this is where maanvi will play cupid by making heer jelousy meanwhile someone elsa is getting jelousy(virat)Angry
 
PART 2 PG 4
PART 3 PG 8
PART 4 PG 14 
Impo note pg:19 plz readSmile


Edited by maanviluvzvirat - 30 January 2012 at 9:58pm

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rockinggirl555pinklillieslaila889nya_sMahnoor5671Dannyelanikki1211amee1lemymoonstruckTrueMuskaanme.sankavyakomaliMaohshrutiavm2cute4u_22luvlife84sha19anvyagnihotrideepika03Vaarya53inlvwithehmmbh-Hanna-sonika_virmanluv.u.zindagiMaya.tasnimnaina-syedpinkstarsbooksfreak07aaliya25imran78PixieFlameRuchi-interestchandiniebindaJessica.Patelaysha1989Nazmaaarul01princess14shaimahJULIEL~~BaBy~AnGel~~sups2222cutie_mahimarev4evadusksnehalovegurtinayikajia123sagaraloneloveJESNIAkulsum_virmanKanwal_chohanKSG_luvcanuck-umzJyoti21xxXSejalXxxpreethisthejazzgalashred12|Persephone|tina_1234_Littles12_love_never_diesVarunKiBiwi__Sneha__

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TrueMuskaan

Senior Member

TrueMuskaan

Joined: 21 December 2005

Posts: 745

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 7:26pm | IP Logged

Hey sweety, first I jus wanna say thanks, I was really touched by your PM, there are far better writers in this forum than myself and I was shocked and happy that you asked specifically for my comment Smile

Ok, now to the post, I really like your descriptions, and even though it was mean, I liked the way Virat told Maanvi to shut up lol, and I loved the ending, her answering his call and shouting dont talk to me lol.
 
Keep it up Thumbs Up

The following 2 member(s) liked the above post:

Piya.DKSG_luv

KSG_luv

IF-Rockerz

KSG_luv

Joined: 12 November 2011

Posts: 8201

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 7:29pm | IP Logged
Hey u wrote beautifully this was amazing cz we need sum attitude to show to virat tht was excellent plz continue soon nd do pm me. This wa excellent. Plz cont soon

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Piya.D

Piya.D

Goldie

Piya.D

Joined: 24 November 2011

Posts: 1799

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 7:30pm | IP Logged
OMG THANK U SOOO MUCH THIS MEANS ALOT TO ME THANK U THANK U THANK U SOOO MUCHHeart U R ONE OF MY FAV WRITERS

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

TrueMuskaan

TrueMuskaan

Senior Member

TrueMuskaan

Joined: 21 December 2005

Posts: 745

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 7:36pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by maanviluvzvirat

OMG THANK U SOOO MUCH THIS MEANS ALOT TO ME THANK U THANK U THANK U SOOO MUCHHeart U R ONE OF MY FAV WRITERS
 
No problem WinkSmile 
Embarrassed I'm one of your fav writers? That's sweet EmbarrassedSmile 
 
Jus continue with the descriptions, talk bout their thoughts and feelings, and this will be one awesome FF Clap

The following 1 member(s) liked the above post:

Piya.D

Piya.D

Goldie

Piya.D

Joined: 24 November 2011

Posts: 1799

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 7:47pm | IP Logged
Yes u r one of my fav writers and thank u for the advice and I would follow it thank u tons Heart

aaliya25

Goldie

aaliya25

Joined: 27 October 2011

Posts: 1305

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 8:52pm | IP Logged
wowww i love this! please continue and definitely pm me =P love this!!! great job!

IrUmIBrAhIm

Goldie

IrUmIBrAhIm

Joined: 19 April 2006

Posts: 1452

Posted: 04 December 2011 at 9:05pm | IP Logged
Woww cont soon and pm me Plz

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