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Should married women retain maiden names

mist Groupbie

Joined: 26 December 2005
Posts: 156

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 5:25am | IP Logged

How individualistic do you think names are. Is it acceptable for a lady to insist on keeping her Maiden name.
Do you think it is time we abolish the 'Mrs'


Does a rose by any other name smell just as sweet.
Do you think it is unnecessary rebellion against a norm that binds a family.

jasunap IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 07 October 2005
Posts: 10848

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 6:12am | IP Logged
from a feminist point of view i dont see any reason why a woman should change her name. she is known by a name all her life till she choses to get married. then suddenly changing your name, moving your house, adapting yourself to something totally different, amounts to breaking off all ties with the previous life you have lived. i dont think that is necessary to go on in life. i think she should retain her name. like you said a rose by any name smells as sweet. so where is the problem in retaining your own name? you look the same, you retain your ideas, you believe in the same principles, you stand by pretty much the same values and ethics you have stood by, how does a name change make you different - except in confusing others and giving you a new identity and disassociation from your past. i per se would like to be known by for my name gives me my individuality and my confidence! Big smile
sowmyaa IF-Dazzler

Joined: 23 August 2004
Posts: 3658

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 6:14am | IP Logged
I agree with Jasunap..there is no reason to change your maiden name...the name you have been carrying since you were born and then suddenly one fine day it gets changed Ouch that's not fair. I think whole world have been knowing me since that name and just 'coz I decided to spend my life with this prince charming does not give right to anyone to force me to change the name. Yes, if one wants to change it my their wish it's fine, but it should not be tradition. I still hold my maiden name and carry my dad's name and I just love it. Tongue
Aparna_BD IF-Dazzler

Joined: 01 July 2005
Posts: 4924

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 7:09am | IP Logged
I agree with Jasunap and Soumya . Infact these days Women seem to be retaining their maiden names .

I personally decide to let my Maiden name be my middle name and husbands name in the end . Big smile

I also agree we should drop the Mrs and get on with it ...." Ms " should be ideal. I mean the guys stays a Mr. So & So forever . Why not a woman ?

*dolly* IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 22 January 2005
Posts: 13663

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 7:12am | IP Logged
before I write my views on this I want to post this article

Using Your Maiden Name by Diane and Linda from Womankind (1971)

(Editors Note: Women who chose to use their own names ran into all kinds of legal hassles. This article explained how to cope with them.)

A woman's right to continue using her maiden name after marriage is not clearly defined under present Illinois law. There is no state statute which specifically requires that a woman change her name when she marries. However, case law indicates that based on common law principles and "immemorial custom", a woman abandons her maiden name and takes her husband's surname, which then becomes her legal name. The general common law rule that a person may legally assume any name she or he wishes without resort to the legal process apparently does not apply to married women. After a divorce decree, a woman may resume her maiden name without permission of court.

As a result of the ambiguity in current Illinois law, a married woman who chooses to retain her maiden name may face inconvenience and possibly serious legal consequences. For example, a woman who fails to change her voter registration after marriage loses her right to vote. A woman is technically in violation of state law if she fails to notify the Secretary of State of a name change on her driver's license after she is married. In Illinois it is unlawful to conduct any business under a name other than one's legal name without filing a notice in the newspaper for three consecutive weeks. If you don't follow these procedures you can be fined or imprisoned. Married women using their maiden name may be denied contract or other rights or absolved of legal responsibility.

Women who use their maiden names may not face legal problems such as these, but they are certain to face inconvenience and harassment. Marshall Field's, for instance, insists that women turn in their credit cards after marriage and have them reissued in their husband's name. If a woman can prove she has an independent source of income, the store may allow her to have her own card issued to her first name and her husband's surname. Under no circumstances will she be allowed to maintain an account under her maiden name. As a man in Field's Credit Department explained, "She no longer exists as a person under her maiden name.' Married women who for personal or professional reasons chose to retain their maiden names may also meet resistance in entering into contracts, buying insurance or purchasing items such as a car or furniture. Many companies refuse to permit a woman to use anything but her "legal" name when entering into an agreement.

Recognizing the need for legal clarification and modernization on this issue, State Congresswoman Eugenia S. Chapman introduced a bill in the state legislature which would have allowed a married woman to choose her surname for legal purposes.

The bill was defeated by a vote of 45 (yes) to 58 (no), with 74 not voting (89 votes are needed for passage). Those against the bill expressed concern as to what name children would have if such a bill passed, while others worried that state motel owners would be unable to safeguard "public morals" if married guests were allowed to register as Miss Jane Doe and Mr. Joe Schmoe. Ms. Chapman intends to reintroduce the bill in the next session of the Legislature. Those interested in testifying before a committee on the need for such a bill should contact Ms. Chapman through her office.

Edited by dolly - 07 February 2006 at 7:13am
*dolly* IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 22 January 2005
Posts: 13663

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 7:20am | IP Logged
now the above article I beleive is old one and it is talking about IL law in US.But I thought to share that how things have changed and what probelms women faced because of keeping maiden name.
When I got married, I struggled with the name question. Having two different last names in a household would have been too complicated, and a hyphenated name felt cumbersome. I took my husband's last name and use my maiden name as a middle name, and I have never regretted this decision. Especially now that we have a children, I like the fact that we all have the same last name; but my own family name is still there like my history and everything else about me that I cannot just edit away.

Edited by dolly - 07 February 2006 at 7:20am
Traveller Senior Member

Joined: 16 November 2005
Posts: 201

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 8:16pm | IP Logged
i definetly believe that maiden names shd be retained!its so unfair changing the identity of a women after shes married..i mean men dont change their names do they?? Confused
lots of women i kno have changed their names after marriage but i still continue calling them with their maiden names..tho i still cant figure out whether they liked being called by their present names or maiden names....
rebelqueen Senior Member

Joined: 15 November 2005
Posts: 575

Posted: 07 February 2006 at 10:28pm | IP Logged
i def think maiden names shud b retained-a woman can't give up her identity just b'coz she chooses 2 associate wid a man 4 the rest of her..isn't she her father's daughter even after marriage???then y change???
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