Joined: 16 December 2007
Joined: 16 December 2007
Joined: 11 August 2011
Joined: 16 December 2007
Joined: 16 December 2007
Part 3: Sometimes when we touch
Quelling the butterflies in my tummy, I sat crunched on the couch.. All evening I had spent in this encompassing nervousness.. He had texted me to let me know he had a dinner meeting; not to wait for him.. but I didn't hear from him apart from that.. Wonder what his reaction to the card was.. This must have been the 78th time I chided myself ever since I got off work and had no other excuse not to think of it.. I sure can be silly.. But then again how else could I have given it to him.. On the face wasn't even an option.. I wouldn't have survived that anxiety.. Ughh.. I was so ready to face the consequences, just second guessing about it was worse.. As it is, it left me scatter-brained all evening. I grimaced again recalling the goof ups at dinner. Thank god Pappaji was at that dinner meeting too. 'Imagine the embarrassment of him being a witness'. I shrugged again..
I came to the same conclusion for the 7th time in a row after this game of permutations- yesterday evening would have been the perfect time to give him that card; only if there weren't the million interruptions and I hadn't chickened out.. And at night he had said he needed to tend to something important and I didn't even know when he got back.. or if he did at all.. because stupid me slept on the couch.. and the bed was still made when I woke up and mummyji told me he had left for work early.. There was this strange joy in her eyes this morning.. I drifted.. must have been for the surprise party.. I guess Vaibhavji loved it too.. I had goose bumps again recalling the moment when he looked at me after mummyji told him I had planned it.. How I wish he isn't offended by the card..
Talking to his picture yet again; it had somehow become common practice.. I blushed "Please Vaibhavji scold me if you feel its inappropriate but don't feel obliged to reciprocate"
"Devki" I jumped off my reverie as I heard my name. and heard the door slam.. Only to ease off.. it was Nirali.. who was in her own tangent; she hadn't thankfully noticed the picture I was holding.. While she ranted I slowly kept it back on the table..
"I don't believe it.. I don't want to marry that Kunal Rajput.. I mean I haven't even met him once.. for all I know he is some 3 horned devil" she slumped on the couch..
"Nirali.. don't you think you are being way too judgmental about it.. Maybe he will turn out to be just human." I cracked up to see her roll eyes.. I sobered and continued, in a serious vein "Nirali, I didn't meet Vaibhavji either before our marriage was arranged. I trusted Bha's reading and of course your family, I had met almost everyone- baa, bapuji, mummijy, Sidharth bhai.. You-my best friend.. and of course.. Pappaji" I fondly chimed..
"Mr and Mrs Rajput appeared genuinely nice. And Vaibhavji had only good things to say about Kunal".. Don't you think you should give all these people some benefit..
"But I don't love him" she refuted..
I argued "Well who says one has to love before marriage.. it can happen after too"
" Not with me.. I don't believe in that.. for me I have to find that connect with him before.. something that makes you want to lose yourself" she coasted..
"Hmm maybe.. who knows you may find that connect with Kunal"
She jumped on me "not possible"
"Stop being juvenile Nirali.. you are so sure like you already have someone in your life. Do you" I asked half jokingly but she didn't share the humor; clearly uncomfortable.. like I had touched some raw nerve.. I asked her more genuinely this time "Do you.. you can tell me Nirali.. trust me I would help you"
She smiled and replied "No there is nothing to help with really.. If and when there is I'll make sure you are there for me.. You do owe me for the Irani chais at least" she gave me a quick hug and romped off.. 'Typical' I nodded..
Dragging the cart of milk and medicines.. I entered as he was in the process of taking off his coat.. I helped him.. My nights were incomplete without our two minutes together- even if it ended in arguments; like it does on most occasions and I voice my anguish by retiring to my half of the room and activating the partition… sigh.. but I have seasoned myself to wait for those 2 minutes.. especially on occasions like today when I am at peace and am hoping to quell his tension regarding Vaibhav..
"I spoke to Vaibhav this morning.. and he put my doubts to rest" I started while hanging his coat as he opened the door to the balcony overlooking the pool..
" I know his decision to involve Devki in this film business wasn't smart at all" I went and stood next to him "But somehow facing his past has made him realize what's at stake.. He would be more careful now" He turned and gave me a smile.. as I earnestly requested " I would request you to put this episode behind and wish Devki well on this venture"
"And why do you think, I won't?" He laughed "Besides, It is Vaibhav's money after all.. I am a businessman Charu.. and of course a father.. a proud one today.. Our son has expressed a desire today.. of having Devki''s company on his business trip next week"
I was elated at this news would be an understatement.. I offered silent prayers to Tejo Baba.. Finally these two were moving in the right direction.. there was hope..
"But there is no denying.. it was close Charu.. very close.. and I don't like taking chances in life.. more so WITH life" he straightened up… his face serious.. but soft the next minute "Anyhow.. I feel like a swim.. send the medicines downstairs, will you" as I nodded and he left calmly, leaving me looking at his receding frame outside the circle he made around himself..
She was right where I had left her this morning.. only, now she wasn't sleeping. Caressing the pillow.. she was lost in thoughts as I solemnly entered, the card and note in my hand.. in full view.. She straightened up, smiling gently.. I noticed her smile give way to nervousness as she saw the card in my hand.. I played along..
"This" pointing to the card "wasn't a part of our understanding" I looked her in the eye.. somewhere nervous too..
"Yes Vaibhavji, understanding was THE foundation of our marriage.. but for me, the foundation has expanded.." she continued gently.. " But I don't expect you to be on the same page. I apologize if you felt offended".. As I gaped, she reasoned "You have all the rights to reject it"
I played along her reasoning, somewhere drawn to the idea of messing with her conviction "Oh really! If you were so sure I would reject it, why did you bother writing it" I dropped the card callously on the table..
"I only exercised my right to expression.. I was being fair to my feelings but I don't hold you accountable to those.. Much like me, you are entitled to your sentiments and I would only expect you to follow your heart and chose a course that you can uninhibitedly follow all your life"
'Unbelievable' I couldn't fathom the strength this girl had in her simple convictions.. As she turned to move dejectedly, I walked over to the I-pod speaker and hooked my phone.. turning to Dan Hill for support- coz he makes up for what I lack.. expression
You ask me if I love you..
And I choke on my reply..
I'd rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie..
She turned to face me.. as I looked straight into her conveying..
And who am I to judge you.. on what you say or do..
I am only just beginning to see the real you..
Her eyes moistened.. a tear drop fighting its way through.. as I walked up to the chest drawer.. doing what needed to be done.. telling her what needed to be told..
And sometimes when we touch
The Honesty's too much
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I pulled out the divorce papers and shoved it into the shredder.. replacing the folder with her card.. placing it back where it belonged..
She was sobbing now.. as I headed towards her.. holding her shoulders..
I wanna hold you till I die..
Till we both break down and cry..
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides..
I gently embraced her as she lay her head against my heart.. trying to calm down while I stroked her hair..
Romance and all its strategies
Leaves me battling with my pride..
But through the insecurities some tenderness survives..
I hugged her more tightly now.. moving in to nuzzle in her hair.. as she closed in.. her hand slightly touching mine.. seeming to understand… as always..
I am just another writer.. still trapped within my truth..
A hesitant prize fighter.. still trapped within my youth..
She broke apart… but only after dropping a feather light peck on my cheek.. blushing crimson in the process..
Sometimes when we touch..
I made her sit on the edge of the bed.. kneeling down, holding her hand and confessed
" I once asserted.. you could expect trust, respect, freedom, social status from me and I hope I lived it up till now.. but you had said at one point every marriage needs love to make it through.. "
She cut me "Vaibhavji" as I placed a finger on her lips..
"Today we have that love.. the initiation may have come from you.. but I have faith its enough to form a basis.. for my efforts towards building a beautiful life together.. I promise you all my honesty.. if you only help me with your affectionate patience in this course.."
I closed in.. hesitantly placing my lips where my finger was.. as she assured me with her reciprocation.. whole-heartedly..
Breaking apart, she surmised caressing my hand "When I was in a dilemma about our proposal, Mummyji had given me a solicitation.. She had said its not important that one takes the right decision every time.. what's more prudent is to make it right once its taken.. "She smiled, lying down and pulling me gently, her arms around me..concluding " I love you Vaibhavji" as we reconciled with our destiny..
We were meant to be…
Joined: 16 December 2007
Joined: 26 October 2010
Joined: 04 August 2011
@Sonali,you are taking me wrong.I am not trying to change ur thoughts or views about VV. I know ur talking about charu& imv's good boy VV or you can say devki's "VAIBHAVJI", which I also like, but I don't want to remember VV as sabina'slover.BeforeVV's b'day,I liked his character,but after that things completely got reversed. Definitely,i wld like to see presentation of VV on come back ofSabina. My points 2 & 3 are different as I m thinking that if in future,VS get 2gather then how will they face devki's success, sacrifice & imv- cp,past relationship. Its depends on U,if u want to show VS2 gather or not & if yes, then I would love 2 get answers for my points 2 & 3.
I m eagerly waiting for(imv-cp-d)track. mpov'CP character would be more challenging for you & interesting, how u will justify cp & ma parimita. CP's past will be a big puzzle for D if devki easily get through secrets of cp's life, than she will be understand imv as well'..so I am waiting my fav. track of mb''
UR doing a fantastic job'..i know u will justify each character & of course that of main heart & souls of mb i.e."DEVKI&IMV'. In my opinion Devki's character should be equally more powerful b'coz she will have to face powerful IMV.
lov u dear ...
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