Rules from the MEN

vijay Admin Group

Site Admin
Joined: 09 December 2003
Posts: 7192

Posted: 10 June 2004 at 12:41pm | IP Logged


We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the  rules from the male side. Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Don't cut your hair. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.

1. Crying is black-mailing.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Nor do strong or obvious hints... just say it!

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 24 hours.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.

1. If something we said could be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways pisses you off, we meant the other one.

1. It is genetic for us to look at women. Just deal with it.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know the best way to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions. We don't need them either.

1. All men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.  Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not a proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask you what is wrong and you say NOTHING, we will take it as the truth. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is  fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared  to discuss such topics as cricket, shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

1. You have enough have too many shoes.

1. It is neither in your best interest nor in ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.

1. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.

So, follow the rules.


Vijay Bhatter

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