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Interview with Mona Kapoor - wife of Boney Kapoor

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tinoo

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tinoo

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 5:14am | IP Logged
Hi everyone,
 
I found this interview posted on india forums archives -  interview with Mona Kapoor - published March 6th 2007 in DNA Mumbai.  I loved the sentence where she says she kept trying to change herself to appeal to him, and then one day, she realized that SHE WAS NOT THE FAILURE, HER RELATIONSHIP HAD FAILED.   I love this distinction. I think all too many times, when relationships dont work (any relationship, not just the romantic variety) we sometimes do a lot of self introspection and then try to "fix" ourselves because we feel the fault lies inside us.  It has taken me a lot of therapy to realize that I am enough and I am perfect, and that someone else's interest in me/lack of interest in me is not required to validate me.
 
This interview was originally posted by member Mona21. 
 
Thanks, tinoo.
 
 
 
Mona Kapoor talks on rising above a splintered marriage with producer Boney Kapoor and finding her own identity.

Dreams bite dust

I had an arranged marriage with Boney Kapoor. He was 10 years older to me. I was 19 when I married him. So I literally grew up with him. Ours was a 13-year-old marriage. So it came as a shock when I realised that my husband was in love with somebody else.

A second relationship was something that one had only read or heard about. But when it happened to me, at that very point my marriage was over. Respect, for me, is foremost. Love follows that. As we evolve, sometimes needs change. Boney too needed somebody else; not me. There was nothing left in the relationship to give it a chance because Sridevi was already with a child. Their rishta was kayam. That itself was a big statement for me to opt out.

Tiding torment

It was also a tough time for my son Arjun and daughter Anshula, who were both in school. The world is a cruel place. When you are going through bad times, they speculate about you and discuss you in their living room. So, in school, my children had to face torment from their classmates. But they became strong and learnt to face facts. What held us together was the thread of pain.

God spoke

My family including my father, my mother and sister was the greatest support. They told me, 'Whether you cry, lick your wounds, turn into a recluse or go to the Himalayas, we are with you!' The humiliation was painful because I was pitted against a heroine. I was made to feel lesser. Industry wives gave me suggestions like, 'Why don't you lose weight?' or 'Why don't you join a spa?' All this made me realise that I had to get up, dust myself and start walking all over again. I told my parents that I wanted to make my own identity. Also the advice that my friend Meena Goculdas' mother gave me became the gospel truth for me. She said, 'If somebody has no place in your life, then you can have no place for them in yours.' This was my aakashwani. I understood that I had not failed my relationship had!

Future sisters

I took to TV production with my sister. We produced shows including 'Yug', 'Vilayati Babu', 'Hera Pheri' and 'Kaise Kahoon'. The goodwill that we created was tremendous. Later, we took it as a challenge to make a movie set, which had upmarket amenities for artistes. Today our company Future Studios is spread over 12 sets on 12 floors in two buildings.

Bitter? Never!

My children live with me but are close to their father too. They travel with him, dine with him. I have no animosity or hatred for the man. It would be cruel if I kept the children away from him because I cannot substitute him. I don't know how to think like a man. I want him to be happy. After all, I gave up my place so that he could be happy. 

Love hamesha

I don't miss a man in my life. I have had some very beautiful relationships. One even lasted for four years. But I'm not interested in marriage. Because one tends to carry along emotional baggage, which the man may not always understand. Life's been like one rollercoaster where you shriek, throw up and even laugh. Today, I've no pain. My jholi is full.

As told to Farhana Farook



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fast trak

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fast trak

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 6:07am | IP Logged
thanks for that article. i dont understand how can a lady spoil another lady's home. men (well not all) tend to stray easily  Dead but it is said that u have to be a woman to understand another woman. then i dont understand how does one lady become another's enemy and snatch someone elses happiness? 

imagine that mona kapoor a teenager marrying that 10 yr senior guy and him coolly ditching her for a hot looking lady after a good 13 yrs. no wonder sridevi is all slim and trim now (she has to keep him in tow) otherwise she was such a fatso before. i actually liked her so much but now after reading this article i feel so disgusted abt her. 

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.Ashima

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.Ashima

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 6:11am | IP Logged
Originally posted by fast trak

thanks for that article. i dont understand how can a lady spoil another lady's home. men (well not all) tend to stray easily  Dead but it is said that u have to be a woman to understand another woman. then i dont understand how does one lady become another's enemy and snatch someone elses happiness? 

imagine that mona kapoor a teenager marrying that 10 yr senior guy and him coolly ditching her for a hot looking lady after a good 13 yrs. no wonder sridevi is all slim and trim now (she has to keep him in tow) otherwise she was such a fatso before. i actually liked her so much but now after reading this article i feel so disgusted abt her. 
 
i too feel same for shirdevi...

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tiny15

IF-Sizzlerz

tiny15

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 7:32am | IP Logged
Originally posted by fast trak

thanks for that article. i dont understand how can a lady spoil another lady's home. men (well not all) tend to stray easily  Dead but it is said that u have to be a woman to understand another woman. then i dont understand how does one lady become another's enemy and snatch someone elses happiness? 

imagine that mona kapoor a teenager marrying that 10 yr senior guy and him coolly ditching her for a hot looking lady after a good 13 yrs. no wonder sridevi is all slim and trim now (she has to keep him in tow) otherwise she was such a fatso before. i actually liked her so much but now after reading this article i feel so disgusted abt her. 
dhanya i agree!! i used 2 like sridevi 4 her acting & dances but after her marriage 2 boney kapoor she lowers in my eyes. she may b beautiful & gud actress & dancer but in area of human values & compassion shes a big zeroThumbs Down Thumbs Downatleast from my POV!!

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fast trak

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fast trak

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 7:53am | IP Logged
dolly i think i started disliking her around the time when i saw her at award ceremonies with boney. look at  boney and his structure. these men...i tell u chahe woh khud kaise bhi motey aur out of shape kyun na ho unko ladki ekdum slim and trim and sweet sixteen wali hi chahiye. 

even now sridevi comes at all award functions with boney and her daughters. it must be so painful for mona and esp her kids to watch their dad with his other wife and family.

ive read a saying somewhere...the best gift any man can give his children is to love their mother. and if any man fails to do this he falls in the eyes of his own kids. fir chahe usne koi badi achievement hi kyun na kiya ho all of no use. 

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ILoveDrama

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 8:07am | IP Logged
 I was just about to make this post but was holding myself back not only Sridevi, even Hema malini , Amala from south(Nagarjuna's wife)Nayantara (again from south is going to marry Prabhu deva who just got divorce) (these are the few couples I know, there might be more, but its just disgusting and U know the funny part is all the people think its ok for those so called celebraties but a girl is a girl, celebrity or not doesn't matter.

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Pras555

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Pras555

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 8:31am | IP Logged
Originally posted by ILoveDrama

I was just about to make this post but was holding myself back not only Sridevi, even Hema malini , Amala from south(Nagarjuna's wife)Nayantara (again from south is going to marry Prabhu deva who just got divorce) (these are the few couples I know, there might be more, but its just disgusting and U know the funny part is all the people think its ok for those so called celebraties but a girl is a girl, celebrity or not doesn't matter.

You are right I don't know why these cine actress do such things
Can't they think once a man who can leave his wife and come with them
Won't he leave her for other woman anyhow thank q for the article
After reading this sridevi will be nowhere in any girl or women's heart

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pratts

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pratts

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Posted: 25 August 2011 at 9:26am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Pras555

Originally posted by ILoveDrama

I was just about to make this post but was holding myself back not only Sridevi, even Hema malini , Amala from south(Nagarjuna's wife)Nayantara (again from south is going to marry Prabhu deva who just got divorce) (these are the few couples I know, there might be more, but its just disgusting and U know the funny part is all the people think its ok for those so called celebraties but a girl is a girl, celebrity or not doesn't matter.

You are right I don't know why these cine actress do such things
Can't they think once a man who can leave his wife and come with them
Won't he leave her for other woman anyhow thank q for the article
After reading this sridevi will be nowhere in any girl or women's heart



No, once their prime years are gone they start looking for a stability (read old rich men) and they get them by hook or crook and yes while some may have married while still doing well to younger men, the fact is that their egos are so big they think they are entitled to anything they want, justified or not, its like divas throwing fits, I want that man and thats it.  all these heroines could have easily opted for any other suitable eligible bachelor but no, somebody elses man is all they wantDeadDeadAngryAngry  Julia Roberts too is one big example to me.  All her charm dissipated for me when she chose to get her present husband divorce to marry her and then the loser Marc Anthony too.  But what goes around comes around, they too will reap the seeds they have sown...bheej boya neem ka toh aam kahah se hoye...

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