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FF: Mohabbat Door Jaane na De-part 16 pg 46 (Page 18)

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the_rain

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the_rain

Joined: 26 March 2007

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Posted: 16 August 2011 at 9:03pm | IP Logged


Wow! What a story!

You weaved the plot really well and I loved how you described Arnav's growing up days. And Khushi is here too in the last part...poor girl, she must be totally baffled at Arnav's behaviour. Coming to the Mandir and ordering her to stop singing...waiting to see her reaction..

If you have a PM list, add me in it...I'm totally hooked to your story..LOL

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Posted: 17 August 2011 at 11:40am | IP Logged

Part 5:

Voice: Kahan tak padhi ho beta? Says an elderly lady '

Bua: BA poora kiya hai humri payal ne nanda kisor ' says bua, as she smiles looking at the boy. " aur khaana bahut accha bana leti hai '."

Parents exchange nervous glances at one another crossing their fingers hoping this would work out. Just then, they can hear some commotion happening outside and everyone's attention gets diverted.

A girl walks in grumbling and mumbling to herself biting onto jalebis hard. Her eyes look a little moist, and her nose has turned red and these are two signs that she may have cried a while ago. Suddenly the entire focus is shifted from Payal and everyone turns towards Khushi who plonks herself onto the chair without noticing the guests at home.

Her father a little embarrassed, and a little concerned asks ' " kya hua beta '..aap ro rahi thi '.

Khushi: ro nahi rahe the baba, gusse se laal ho rahey the ' chacha ke dukaan main chunri hai na ' utna laal '.

Shashi cant help but smile looking at his little daughter making baby faces ... and then turns to  others and says ' " ji yeh humari choti beti Khushi '"

Before he can finish the sentence the boy talks '"Mujhe yeh ladki pasand hai '" and everyone turns towards the guy in shock'.

The boy is staring Khushi.' saying ' Hume Khusee ji pasand hai '. Kya hum unse shaadi kar sakte hai '

This is when Khushi realised she had walked in on her sisters rishta session. Her parents hadn't even warned her. Why they were in a hurry to get her sister married she could never fathom. This time around the boy had picked her instead of Di'. She stood up ... smiled at the guy and his parents awkwardly.  As the boy had a curvy blush plastered on his face, Khushi had no other option but to give into the pressure of having a short conversation with the boy. A few minutes later when they came out, the boy was blushing more than ever while Khushi also had a confident look on her face.

Parents looked on and waited anxiously as Khushi and Kishore spent some minutes outside, talking to each other with their backs facing the on lookers. A while later, two of them returned with Khushi's straight face and the boys smiling face. Just as the parents looked at the two in anticipation Khushi looked straight into the eyes of the parents and said'

 Khu: Main yeh shaadi nahi kar sakti, mujhe yeh ladka pasand nahi hai .

Everyone is shocked at the bold declaration. The boy is shocked and humiliated as well.

Boy: Par bahar aapne toh kaha tha aap ko shaadi se aitraaz nahi hai '

Khushi: Haan

Boy: Aur ladka agar padha likha ho toh aur bhi accha hai '

Khushi: ji bilkul'

Boy: apne yeh bhi kaha ke aap Lucknow shehar ko chor ke nahi jaana chahti ' aur maine kaha ke mujhe koi aitraaz nahi hai ..

Khushi: sahi suna aapne '

Boy: toh fir yahan andar aake mana karne ka kya matlab '

Khushi: Haan Kishore ji '. Lekin ' maine kab kaha tha .. ke main aapke bare main baat kar rahii thi .. main to yuhi uss ladke ke bare main bol rahi thi jisse meri shadi hogi '

Boy: yeh kaisa behuda mazaak hai '(infuriated)

The parents of the boy are very humiliated and angry as well and give the Gupta family a dirty stare as they look down embarrassed unable to meet their eyes because of their daughters behaviour '.Gauging this, buaji takes the initiative on behalf of the family and speaks up

Bua: Ji, choti bacchii hai ' aap humko thoda samay de dejiye ga ' aur use duniya ki samajh nahi hai ' aap humari payal se baat kariye na 'wo '

Khushi: koi zaroorat nahi hai bua ji ' (determined)

The boy and his parents make faces and walk away ' As Garima for the first time gets ready to slap Khushi '.as Shashi stops her '.

Gar: iss ladki ko itni bhi samajh nahi hai, ke bahar waalo se saath kaisa bartaav kiya jaata hai ' wo humari payal ko dekhne aaye the '(sobs)

Khu: aur mujhe pasand karke chale gaye '( she says sarcastically)

As Garima gets ready to strike her this time, Khushi's father stops her and holds her back, as Khushi continues to talk with no fear in her eyes '

" kya fayda amma aise ladke ka .. jo apne nirnay pe tika nahi reh sakta '. Kal usko koi aur ladki pasand aa gayi toh wo hume bhi chor dega kya '"

Gari: bahut bolne lagi hai tu aaj kal'.. teri umar kya hai aur dekh kaisi batein karti hai '

Shas: Baat toh sahi hai na Garimaji'

Payal comes in her sisters defence and says ' " amma' babuji ' hume wo ladka sacchi main pasand nahi aaya tha'. Ab please hum yeh baat yahin rehne dete hai ' main aapse vinnati karti hoon '"

She takes Khushi and walks off into the room' as though protecting her '

Garima: aap sab ki laad hi ne isey bigaad kar rakha hai isey .. sahi aur galat ki samajh hi nahi hai isme '

Bua: pehli baar pate ki baat ki hai issne ' (nodding on agreement grumbling and mumbling to herself)

In the Room:

A while later as Payal is folding clothes, Khushi walks up to her sister and hugs her from behind. Payal smiles and knows immediately it was her little sister feeling guilty and perhaps making an attempt to say sorry 'She turns around and holds Khushi by both her hands looks at her in the eye and asks '

Pay: Khushi tumne uss ladke ko mana kyun kar dia ' sach sach batana '

Khushi:  sach '? ( she asks determined)

Payal nods'

Khushi: bilkul sach?

Payal shakes her head again meaning to say yes'

Khushi: wo ' kya hai na jeeji ' hume na ..  jiss tarah se khoooseee keh ke pukar rahey the .. wo bilkul pasand nahi aaya hume '

Payal: dhat'. Tu bhi na Khushi '..

Khushi: sacchi jeeji ' aapki kasam ... sochiye ' zindagi bhar' ke liye ' apne aap ko khoooseee'. Khoooseee bulwaalo ' khoooseee meraa towel dena'. Khoooseee khaane laga do '. Khoooseee meri tie kahan hai '.. mere naam ka toh antim kriya ho jaata '. Issi liye humne jhat se unhe mana kar dia '

Payal: Khushi ' tune mere wajah se mana kar dia na '.

Khushi: haan jeeji .. ! (Turning serious for a moment) ' hum tumko aise kaise jaane dete 'filhaal agar aap pe kisi ka haq hai wo sirf humara hai '

Payal: Par Khushi '..shaadi toh kabhi na kabhi kisi na kisi se honi hi hai na .. tumhari ya meri '

Khushi: kya jeeji aap bhi ' tab ka tab dekha jayega na '. Aur hume poora yakeen hai .. ke hum dono ko acche jeevan saathi milenge' aur pata hai jeeji ' jab sahi insaan humare zindagi main ayega hum  ye baat khud hi samajh jayenge '.

Payal: aise ladke filmo main hi milte hai '

Khushi: sacchi ' ??? toh chalo na jeeji ' film dekhne chalte hai ' kya pata ' hume wo hume wahi mil jaaye

And she winks ' as both the sister laugh on'

Raizada House:

Anjali is sulking making a face ... Mami, dadi, and Akash have tried their bit, but with no positive results.  They know if there is someone who can get Anjali's mood right it is Arnav. They had already called him thrice, and they knew he was on the way but, in the meanwhile they didn't want to give up their attempts either.

As Arnav walked in everyone heaved a sigh of relief. Arnav noticed everyone's serious expressions and knew something was not right.  He had been urgently summoned home, all that Akash had written in his text was SOS-45 and Arnav had left his meeting half way and run back home. That had been their code during emergency situations.

Arnav settled down in front of Anjali and looked at her. He tried to hold her hand as she moved it away in anger. Arnav tried again with no success. He knew it was his fault. He had over done it this time. He had already promised his Anjali di that he would not work today since it was a Sunday. But he had called for a meeting since an idea has suddenly struck him and he had to implement it at any cost. After all he didn't want to waste time.

Without any other explanation or words Arnav said ' "  fine di .. aap decide karo ' ke ' aap mujhe kya punishment dengi'. I am guilty as charged"

Anjali looked up .. smiling at Arnav and the rest and winked and said '. " Movie dekhne chale?"

The reluctance was visible on Arnav's face but looking at everyone else and their excitement Arnav just could not say no anymore.

Akash added, mere dost ka theatre hai, main usey call kar doonga, wahan pahucte hi hume tickets mil bhi jayengi '

Outside the Movie Hall: Near the ticket counter

Khushi had been waiting in the line for almost half an hour to get the tickets for the movie. There were only 4 people left before she could get the ticket. Payal had been waiting for her on the other side. While the line slowly cleared and Khushi finally got her chance to her disappointment the guy at the ticket counter told her there were no more tickets. Disappointed Khushi turned to leave when a man dressed as a driver cut the line and walked straight to the counter and said "mujhe raizada sab ne bheja hai"

The man at the counter smiled at him and handed over a bunch of tickets much to her horror.  This was unfair! How could someone else take away tickets she had been waiting and toiling for? She knew fighting with the counter guy would be of no use. She would tackle the miscreant on her own and get what was hers.  As the driver walked towards the car, Khushi, ran after him stopped him and requested him for the ticket first politely.

The driver paid no attention. When she realised this was not leading to anything she got into an argument with the driver, not backing down.

The window of the car rolled down as a man wearing black aviators and a stuble looked on to see what was taking so long. When nothing happened he decided to get down from the car walking towards them to settle the issue himself' He reached the spot, to notice the driver talking to a girl who had been arguing animatedly explaining things'. To put an end to the issue he said '

"Kya ho raha hai yahan Yogesh '. Itni der kyun laga rahey ho tickets lane main'"

Khushi turned around and much to her shock found herself face to face with Arnav Singh Raizada once more.



Edited by Galarcher - 17 August 2011 at 12:29pm

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IF-Sizzlerz

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Joined: 16 July 2011

Posts: 24479

Posted: 17 August 2011 at 11:53am | IP Logged
edited:
Oh what a cool meeting
One of its kind
The brother sister relationship was awesome
Arnav is so busySleepy
Sunday ko bhi meeting...not fair yaar
Chalo jane do.I will be waiting for their fighting mode convo
Fighting ho ga ya you have other things up your sleeve!Shocked

Thanks a bunch for the pm!!!!
 


Edited by murphy369 - 17 August 2011 at 12:30pm

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-honeydew-

_sana.Magic_

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Posted: 17 August 2011 at 12:00pm | IP Logged
awesomely written.

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-honeydew-

minimuffin86

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Joined: 31 July 2011

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Posted: 17 August 2011 at 12:30pm | IP Logged
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swetha10

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swetha10

Joined: 11 September 2007

Posts: 18532

Posted: 17 August 2011 at 12:30pm | IP Logged
Awesome!!!
luved it... continue soon

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-honeydew-

-honeydew-

IF-Sizzlerz

-honeydew-

Joined: 23 September 2008

Posts: 19050

Posted: 17 August 2011 at 12:43pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by murphy369

edited:
Oh what a cool meeting
One of its kind
hehe thanks a ton murphy... !! glad you found it one of its kind .. well, i dont know other kinds ...LOLLOL

The brother sister relationship was awesome
i am very close to my  younger brother !!! ahem so you see, real life inspiration always helps ...Big smile
Arnav is so busySleepy
Sunday ko bhi meeting...not fair yaar
i know right !!! from now on i shall use Arnav and make him do all things i hate the most about men ... ...AngryAngryEvil Smile
Chalo jane do.I will be waiting for their fighting mode convo
Fighting ho ga ya you have other things up your sleeve!Shocked
i am sorry my dear, you will have to wait !!! i cant reveal much atm...(evil laugh ...LOLEvil Smile)


Thanks a bunch for the pm!!!!
are you like gonna say this each time i write a part Ermm
 

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.hea.

-honeydew-

IF-Sizzlerz

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Posted: 17 August 2011 at 12:44pm | IP Logged
Thanks Smile

Originally posted by sana.shanak

awesomely written.

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