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Jannat ~ Heaven in Hell~ MG FF part 15 updated (Page 4)

maaneetsangel IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 09 March 2011
Posts: 11423

Posted: 23 July 2011 at 5:42am | IP Logged
congrats !!!!!!!! 4 d new one ...

thnx 4 d pm ...

interesting concept n good start ...

loved it ...

continue soon ...

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_BlackPearl_ IF-Stunnerz

Joined: 30 October 2010
Posts: 25213

Posted: 23 July 2011 at 6:53am | IP Logged
Sounds amazing cont. soon

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simi91 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 01 January 2011
Posts: 6794

Posted: 23 July 2011 at 12:31pm | IP Logged
interesting prologue
love it
cont soonnn
ty 4 pm

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freya123 IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 24 August 2010
Posts: 12504

Posted: 24 July 2011 at 10:28am | IP Logged
nice feeling sad 4 manneet . waiiting for update. plz send me pm

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Tyro IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 29 December 2010
Posts: 22061

Posted: 24 July 2011 at 12:15pm | IP Logged
CONGRATS on the new FF...Party

loved the prologue...

maaneet in a terrorism background n army...awesome...

do continue soon...

thnx for PM...

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rs12345 IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 27 December 2010
Posts: 24932

Posted: 24 July 2011 at 7:57pm | IP Logged
Nice concept

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princess_mimi Senior Member

Joined: 29 May 2011
Posts: 760

Posted: 25 July 2011 at 8:58am | IP Logged

Hey guys thanks a lot for your comments... glad u like it... here is the 1st part... hope you like it... n don't 4gt 2 comment...


Part: 1

Maan was shocked hearing this. A girl who has got eyes like this in which he can see his inner self so clearly, can not see. Maan just kept looking in her beautiful eyes.




Maan was totally lost in her eyes. He kept looking at her face which was glowing under the light of the setting sun.

"Kya hua?" The girl said in a low tone.

"Kuch nahin. Tum akele kaise?"

"Main har ek rasta pahechanti hoon."

"Chalo main tumhe ghar tak chod du." He replied.

A smile spread on the girl's face.

"Aap mere sath ghar challenge? Pata hain maine ammi ko bataya kisi ne meri jaan bachayi. Woh aapse milke bahot khush hongi."


Maan started to walk with her.




But he did not notice not so far from them a man was watching them from behind a rock. The man was fully covered with shawl. As they started to walk the man started to follow them maintaining a safe distance.





"Yeh batao tumhare ghar pe aur kaun hain?" Maan asked the girl.

"Ammi aur mere bhai. Par who ab humare saath nahin rahete."


"usne kaha tha ke wo desh ke liye kaam karte hain. Kuch dino ke liye aakele rahena hoga." She sighed and started again. "Aur meri ek saheli jo apni ghar pe kam aur meri ghar pe zada raheti hain."


"Hmm. Aur woh itni bolti hain.. uff."

"waise tum bhi kuch kam nahin bolti."

"aap usse dekhenge toh pata chalega iss mamleme main toh bachi hoon." Maan smiled hearing her.

"Sachi. Kabhi kabhi to mujhe yeh bhi lagta hain ammi use zada pyar karti hain." They took a turn. " aap mujhe bataie aap ke ghar pe aur kaun hain?"

"main, mari dadima, mere bhai" he stopped for a moment.

"aapka bhai?"

"wo nahin raha." Maan bit his lip. He did not know what happened with Dev.


Finally they reached her home. Her mom was waiting for her outside of the house.

"Ammi inse miliye. Isne ussdin meri jaan bachai."

Her mother looked at him then spoke in a low voice.

"hum aapke abhari hain."

"iss taraha batein mat kihiye."

Then she turned at the girl

"Are tu andar ja. Preeti do ghante se tere  liye intezaar kar rahi hain."

"use yahan bulaiye." Then she started to call her friend's name. "Preeti bahar aa jaldi."


After a few minutes Preeti came outside. She was taller than her. But a thing was common in them. A pair of innocent eyes.

"Preeti, isne ussdin meri jaan bachai." Then she turned at him. " yeh hain mari saheli Preeti."

"namaste." Preeti said in a low tone. Then she turned at the girl.

"main tujhse baat nahin karne wali." Preeti said.

"kyun? Phirse Aman se ladai ki?"

"main ne nahin. Usne ki."

"Aman kaun?"

"Aman Hasan. Preeti Pandit ki premi." She smiled.

"main unse phir kabhi baat nahin karungi." Preeti said in her sweet voice.

The girl started giggling.




The man who followed them was noticing Maan. He saw Maan with them. Then started to walk. He wrapped himself in shawl again. Only his eyes were visible. He was walking on a narrow road. Finally he stopped behind a empty old house. There was none near him. So nobody could see where he was going. He entered in a house.




Maan came back to Military Base. He saw Captain Apurva Roy at canteen. Captain Roy was a friend of Dev. Maan sat next to him.

"Where have you been?" he askd.

"You remember that girl I saved two weeks before I met her and went to his home." He sighed. "I am thinking when the state of Kashmir is like this the people here still have not loose their hope."

"Hmm. They are really strong." Remarked Apurva

"I noticed another thing. A Hindu girl with a Muslim boy."

"They are not religious freaks." Apurva answered. "In this case they are better than whole India. None will mind if a Hindu girl marry a Muslim boy."

"The people here are really great. They are so innocent so naive but so strong." Maan replied and smiled.

Suddenly Maan realized he had forgotten to ask the girl's name. He tried to think what her mom was calling her. But he failed. Finally he came to a conclusion. She sings too good. It was her song which attracted him first. He will call her Geet. He smiled.




The man entered the old house. The house looked too old from outside but from inside it was not that bad. The man stopped outside of a room. Another man was standing outside the room holding a rifle.


2nd man : Kya hua?

1st man : Bhaijaanse baat kar sakte hain?

2nd man: Ruko.

The man went inside the room and came out after a few minutes. He indicated the other man to go inside. He went inside.


"Salam Alekum Bhaijaan." The man started to speak.

"Salam Alekum. Kya hua?" A man with baritone voice replied.

"Major Maan Singh Khurana jo kuch dino pahele yahan aye hain. Ateyhi Dev Singh Khurana ke vare me tahekikaat kar rahe hain. Aur Aasim Khan ke vare me vi puch rahe hain. Maine use iss ladki ke saath dekha" the man handed him a picture of the girl.

"Uske saath kya karna hain?" The man asked him and waited for order.

"Kuch nahin Bass uss par nazar rakhna. Khuda hafiz." He replied.

"Khuda Hafiz Bhaijaan." The man replied and left.



Edited by princess_mimi - 25 July 2011 at 9:30am

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priyankasphsnehavashimaaneet05NK4MSK.Naziafatiya52110ammyicycoolGemm-divya-bhakbhartifan-Elfin-nonabebufullyfaltutobblerturboMSgayatriarushi_05diyachillcue1piyushiNetzChahhat4evasumaiyariyaLove2readPrncssOfHeartmishtibNazmaakhushboo22angel_mewloving_girlMina420amalu123amzu32GurruKiDeewani-shristi1ambeernSayaneeH.LectersheetalvasaninaviRocks.Dharanats0101TeamMcSwarekmaaneetmaahisoni4eva-Veritaserum-AudiwaliaSpeechlessritzy09kabslockssimi91krati5KTPROCKSmrk-1ambbihashruti_luvs_msksonu4everRadhika ShahKaSh-Maneet-FanHansaNshah10rsroopalisweet scorpio--Ratna--freya123ShalvepreethiaseemamaryCraziest_MGlove2_somamaaneetsangelpunam2712impoojavermapanchaalirs12345Tyro6n6s6k6i6r6a6n6Desigirls12_BlackPearl_abinash079mysteriousmilliJanakivallavDownhill

SayaneeH.Lecter IF-Dazzler

Joined: 09 December 2010
Posts: 4949

Posted: 25 July 2011 at 9:25am | IP Logged
wow very nice... this ff has such an innocence and feeling of romance that I just go with it... I just loooveee this ff... pls cont soon... I m already in love with Major Maan Sing Khurana n Geet s soo naive ... love itHeart

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