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What is the point of getting married? (Page 8)

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zorrro

Goldie

zorrro

Joined: 29 July 2008

Posts: 2250

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 8:13pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by blue-ice

Originally posted by monar

Personally I can't think of my or any of my friends' parent unmarried, hence there has to be a point of getting married... else there wouldn't be these many married couple around the world
Most of the marriages in India are arranged marriages...even today its true...how are they supposed to love together when they don't even know eachother...secondly..living together is not considered respectable even today in India...most of the people will be afraid to defy the societal norms...sometime back even love marriages were a taboo and u are talking about living together...
My husband and I have been married for 20 years and I can tell u that its not the marriage that keeps us together...its our committment for each other...we married because I don't know what our conservative society would have done to our parents...had we started living together...I hope u get an idea..Tongue
Are you saying that you wouldnt have married otherwise and preferred living together Big smile

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blue-ice

IF-Stunnerz

blue-ice

Joined: 04 March 2009

Posts: 33071

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 9:35pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by zorrro

Originally posted by blue-ice

Originally posted by monar

Personally I can't think of my or any of my friends' parent unmarried, hence there has to be a point of getting married... else there wouldn't be these many married couple around the world
Most of the marriages in India are arranged marriages...even today its true...how are they supposed to love together when they don't even know eachother...secondly..living together is not considered respectable even today in India...most of the people will be afraid to defy the societal norms...sometime back even love marriages were a taboo and u are talking about living together...
My husband and I have been married for 20 years and I can tell u that its not the marriage that keeps us together...its our committment for each other...we married because I don't know what our conservative society would have done to our parents...had we started living together...I hope u get an idea..Tongue
Are you saying that you wouldnt have married otherwise and preferred living together Big smile
Who knows what we would have done 20 yrs back...living together was not an option for us...when u don't have a choice u don't think in those terms...see ..I am not against marriage...I am against the idea that people who do not want to get married and live together are in some way lesser mortals than the married ones...I am just against the hype that surrounds our marriage system...

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Murlal

zorrro

Goldie

zorrro

Joined: 29 July 2008

Posts: 2250

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 9:49pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by blue-ice

Who knows what we would have done 20 yrs back...living together was not an option for us...when u don't have a choice u don't think in those terms...see ..I am not against marriage...I am against the idea that people who do not want to get married and live together are in some way lesser mortals than the married ones...I am just against the hype that surrounds our marriage system...
Why wasn't it an option back then? Was there any law against it that has been ammended now?
 

blue-ice

IF-Stunnerz

blue-ice

Joined: 04 March 2009

Posts: 33071

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 10:06pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by zorrro

Originally posted by blue-ice

Who knows what we would have done 20 yrs back...living together was not an option for us...when u don't have a choice u don't think in those terms...see ..I am not against marriage...I am against the idea that people who do not want to get married and live together are in some way lesser mortals than the married ones...I am just against the hype that surrounds our marriage system...
Why wasn't it an option back then? Was there any law against it that has been ammended now?
 
are u really not getting what I am trying to say or u r just pulling my leg??LOL
 
If u r really an Indian then u have to know that the pressure of the conservative society that we had back then and still have in most parts of india is bigger then any lawLOL...I was young and educated ...I didn't care for what the people thought about me then any more than I do now...but I did care for my parents who I love more than myself...can u imagine what would have become of them if their daughter just started living with a boy without marriage...I don't know what part of India u are from or how old u are but I don't think its hard imagining that...is it??...

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Murlalveil_of_rosessimi_1

zorrro

Goldie

zorrro

Joined: 29 July 2008

Posts: 2250

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 10:18pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by blue-ice

Originally posted by zorrro

Originally posted by blue-ice

Who knows what we would have done 20 yrs back...living together was not an option for us...when u don't have a choice u don't think in those terms...see ..I am not against marriage...I am against the idea that people who do not want to get married and live together are in some way lesser mortals than the married ones...I am just against the hype that surrounds our marriage system...
Why wasn't it an option back then? Was there any law against it that has been ammended now?
 
are u really not getting what I am trying to say or u r just pulling my leg??LOL
 
If u r really an Indian then u have to know that the pressure of the conservative society that we had back then and still have in most parts of india is bigger then any lawLOL...I was young and educated ...I didn't care for what the people thought about me then any more than I do now...but I did care for my parents who I love more than myself...can u imagine what would have become of them if their daughter just started living with a boy without marriage...I don't know what part of India u are from or how old u are but I don't think its hard imagining that...is it??...
No no blue ice ji I am not pulling your leg. I am all confused really. If it is was just the fear of society that forced you into marriage I feel sorry Ouch  I can understand giving in to parental pressure but parents are more understanding and accepting now and I dont think my parents would object to my marrying the person I wish to. They may not like me staying with anyone though.Ermm  I dont have a problem with that as when I meet someone I like  would love to get married to that person. As of now I dont see why I should not. Kindly adviceEmbarrassed

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simi_1blue-ice

blue-ice

IF-Stunnerz

blue-ice

Joined: 04 March 2009

Posts: 33071

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 10:28pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by zorrro

No no blue ice ji I am not pulling your leg. I am all confused really. If it is was just the fear of society that forced you into marriage I feel sorry Ouch  I can understand giving in to parental pressure but parents are more understanding and accepting now and I dont think my parents would object to my marrying the person I wish to. They may not like me staying with anyone though.Ermm  I dont have a problem with that as when I meet someone I like  would love to get married to that person. As of now I dont see why I should not. Kindly adviceEmbarrassed
Don't feel sorry for meLOL...I am happily married...I took the decision to marry out of my free will..LOL...If u would love to marry...I can't think of a reason why u should not...Gosh I am feeling like Agony aunt right nowWacko
 
 

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zorrrosimi_1

return_to_hades

IF-Veteran Member

return_to_hades

Joined: 18 January 2006

Posts: 21354

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 10:30pm | IP Logged
Well enough of all the talk on marriage. I believe in commitments, not in marriages, BUT, BIG HUGE BLACK BUT, if I ever let someone get close enough to hold a gun to my head and make me marry, then they better be willing to have a gleetastic wedding.



There's a chapel down the boulevard we could go-o-o-o,
No one has to know-o-o-o

Actually thats the best kind of marriage.

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blue-ice

_Angie_

IF-Rockerz

_Angie_

Joined: 21 February 2008

Posts: 9888

Posted: 06 July 2011 at 11:16pm | IP Logged
Sarina, I m sure we all believe in the role that commitment plays. Without that nothing works. I don't think commitment and marriage have to be  mutually exclusive! Noted the Huge black BUT LOL Marriages and weddings  can be fun if some traditional ills are taken care of. Per se marriage itself is not bad though as BI said it may be overrated. Forced marriages are no good ever !

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zorrro

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