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Nandu dragged into the whole mess

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woman11

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woman11

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 9:51am | IP Logged
The worst effect of a divorce or a broken relationship falls on the kids. Tender and innocent, the kids fail to understand the complexities of adult relationships and are often put into traumatic situations when they are asked to accept the dynamics of a new relationship. I felt really bad for Nandu today---the poor kid was oblivious of the tensions and is now dragged into it. What do you think of the situation regarding Nandu:

1) Should Gehna have allowed Nandu to talk to Gauri on the terrace and not dragged him from there?
2) Should the adults explain to Nandu what is happening in the haveli?
3) Should Gauri stay away from Nandu and not try to form a bond with this unsuspecting kid?
4) Was Gauri right in explaining her relationship with Jagya to Nandu?


What are your thoughts?


Edited by woman11 - 14 June 2011 at 9:52am

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Suchi-

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 10:01am | IP Logged
I felt Gehna did what anyone in her shoes would have done.

She despises Gauri so how would she let her son talk to Gauri?

She is not being unreasonable. Her loyalties lie with Anandi and rightfully so, thinking about the amount of help she has done for Nandu and Gehna during their time of difficulty. 

=============

Explain to Nandu? what will they explain they themselves are confused as to what to do next and how to handle the situation. 
So right now them telling NOTHING to nandu was the best decision. First the dirt has to settle down and calm down and only then things can be seen clearly. 


Gauri needs to stop trying to be all friendly. It just shows her lack of judgement and how to act properly in situations. She lacks patience and sense so she should stay away from everyone. Until DS is well and get out of the haveli. Her concern is herhusband. The family has broken ties with their son , how can she expect them to understand and accept her-


Gauri should not force and shove the relationship on anyone, nandu is just a kid and her trying to say stuff to him cause he is going to sit and listen as he is a kid just shows that she is being rude and insensitive.

Instead of creating a scene she should learn to sit in a corner and do her daaactari. 



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vasuja

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 10:07am | IP Logged
wonderful post...

the family itself in shock...Kudh ko sambalenge then bachon ko...They have not steadied themself yet...They are not lying or telling anything to nandu now.

Gauri being a doctor who would have learned a little about psychology too, but after wearing Jagdish brand sindoor lost her brains and don't know what to say when...Even truth has to be said in a proper way to kids... now nandu has asker question. what will she answer. My prediction:

She will hold Nandu's hand tightly, take out the legal marriage certificate from her handbag and say," see I have the legal document. Anandi does not have. So I am your bro's wife. now call me Babhi."LOL
LOL
Poor nandu will be like mein kiske paas phas gaya. He will run to his mom and say, "muche us doc se dar lagta hein." the scene will end with gehna giving a killer look to GauriLOLLOLLOL

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woman11

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 12:12pm | IP Logged
Here's my thoughts on this:

1. Gehna's reaction: Gehna should keep Nandu away from this, but should not show her anger for Gauri in front of Nandu. When she had spotted Nandu with Gauri on the terrace she could have distracted Nandu by asking him to go and study or get ready for school or go and play elsewhere, instead of just dragging him down. The adults need to control their emotions in front of the child---else a child is perceptive enough to sense something is wrong and would come up with difficult questions to answer. Gehna, keep Nandu busy with something or the other---give him activities, send him out of the haveli to play but please don't let the child come in between the firing squad.

2. The family: A child is by nature curious. So the family needs to give him a simplified explanation of what is happening around him. They can tell Nandu that Gauri is a guest and a doctor and she is treating dadisa, hence staying in the house. If they want him to stay away from Gauri, they can tell him that she needs to treat dadisa first and if she spends time with Nandu dadisa will not get her treatment. That will be a good way of keeping Nandu away from Gauri and yet not dragging the child in all this mess.

3. Gauri's behaviour to Nandu: Gauri needs to keep away from Nandu as much as possible. She knows the situation of the household is extremely bitter and if she tries to be too cosy with Nandu, chances are that his mother will instantly retaliate and this might lead to unpleasant situations in front of the child. Please don't drag the child into this if his parents are particular that they don't want you near him. They might end up insulting you in front of him or instead scold the child unnecessarily for coming near you.

4. Gauri's explanation to Nandu: I thought this was the most insensitive act by Gauri. She knows very well that Nandu already considers Anandi as his bhabisa---she also saw the samosa scene and knows how close Nandu is to Anandi. Hence she should not have confused and shocked him by imposing herself as his bhabisa. Imagine how traumatic is that for a child!! It's almost like a stranger walking in the house and suddenly telling a kid that she is his mother from now on!! When Nandu had asked about Gauri's identity, Gauri could have just said "I am your friend" or "I am doctor aunty" or something like that. Instead it looked like she was soo greedy for recognition that she thought it was easier to target an unsuspecting child!!  Shocked


Edited by woman11 - 14 June 2011 at 12:21pm

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tiny15

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 12:25pm | IP Logged
@woman11 though i agree wid u abt trying kids 2 b not involved in their tussle but gehna cudn't've reacted like this in front of G wen she was trying 2 get cosy wid her son. she was so disgusted  not just wid J but also wid G that she cudn't control her emotions at that time but she always tried 2 send nandu away from all this on sum pretext or the oder!!
 
& abt G's behaviour her reply was really disgusting & heartless!!Sleepy and i agree she cud'd said "i m ur frnd" or " i m a Dr.aunty" like u told!!!ClapClap

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angelic8219

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 1:49pm | IP Logged
Personally I think Gauri should have butted out and stayed away from Nandu in the first place there was no need to involve the kid. Nandu knew she was a doctor and just assumed her to be Jagya's friend and he was content with it so it should have been left like that.

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-Raz-

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 8:36pm | IP Logged
yes, i felt what Gehna did today,she was right,Children are very innocent and being dragged into a mess like this can cause big probs,children are innocent and become quickly attached to things..so nandu should be kept all away!!

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vivacious_priya

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Posted: 14 June 2011 at 10:18pm | IP Logged
i think gauri should have tell dat she z J's frd
as till now its not final dat she will stay dere forever
dey have to return to Mumbai so why to confuse a child just for few days..
when nandu will grow up he can understand himself wat z gauri to his bhaisa

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