Writers Corner: Books, Stories & Poems

Voting Closed: Summer Solstice Stories! - Page 5

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Posted: 12 years ago


Best Story Told - Entry #4
Best Written Story - Entry #7
Best Title - Entry # 13
Favorite Male Character - Entry #5 [The Stranger]
Favorite Female Character - Entry #7 [Keerti]
Story I Want To Read Ahead - Entry #4
Most Unique Story - Entry #7
Favorite Event - Entry #13 
Edited by mirageas - 12 years ago

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stefanandre thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Excellent job everyone, enjoyed reading all the stories.

Best Story #4
Best Written story #7
Best Title: #13
Favorite Male Character #7 (Suyash)
Favorite Female Character #7 (Keerti)
Most Unique Story #7
Story I want to read ahead #4
Favorite Event #7
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Posted: 12 years ago
best story told = entry 7

Best written story = entry 1

Best title = entry 13

Favourite male character = armaan(#1)

Favourite female character = shilpa(#1)

Story u want to read ahead = entry 1

Most unique story = entry 1
spln thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
Final Call:

Last day left to vote for your entries. Everyone who is yet to un-reserve their boxes in the previous pages, please do so within this given time.

Cheers,
NJ

Edited by spln - 12 years ago
avivakirk thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Best Story- ENTRY 10- 
 
Best Written story- ENTYRY13
 
Best Title: ENTRY 4
Favorite Male Character (Arjun)

Favorite Female Character (Sunitha)
 
 
Story I want to read ahead..ENTRY.4
 
Most Unique Story - ENTRY..8
 
 Favourite  Event - ENTRY1
 
Most liked story -ENTRY13
a little faith thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
Hey NJ, thanks for this contest. Once again just exceptional pieces of prose that were a delight to read.

I hope I made it in time, if not then it really does not matter for our rewards lie in our hard efforts not the results they garner.  Not that I am saying winning isn't nice or that it carries no value, but that truly in my eyes winners are those who give their heart.

entry number one - Pain, death love and life.

I loved the title. I loved how it begins with darker elements, then moves onto light, as our own world turns from dark to day.  The Chinese say that things are completed by their opposites, that in knowing hurt we appreciate love. Here in knowing loneliness, Armaan comes to understand the value of companionship.  Excellently plotted by the writer, that twist was simple yet startling yet significant.  All is well, but something profound has been bestowed unlike other surprises that fade as quickly as they come.  This one will linger, echo throughout his life.  Sshika being that tangible reminder.  Nicely done.

I loved this line, All I knew was that today was the day that I had waited for. I waited for this day since years, but when this day had finally come; I was left shattered, broken into pieces. True, sometimes we wait for that moment, preparing ourselves, anticipating and antagonizing until the wait destroys us before the actual events has a chance to do the same.

The desire to break all my inhibitions and break, crumble, and tear myself into pieces.
Excellent, subtle mention to those of us who hate to cry, even when alone and yet can not help ourselves, for it is only human. 

My favourite line, She had come back to me. Even I breathed a breathe of freedom from despair. 

Wonderful piece, a delight to read.

Entry number 2, My cool savior.

I liked that cool in the title, to contrast against the heat of the longest day. That first line was just exceptional, I loved reading it even on the third rewind. Perspiration oozed out of my pores like a sponge's absolute paradox. I loved how the writer uses descriptions words rather than just descriptive words, for example, the white folded paper I waved over my face, tweaking the piece a little.

I yearned for him to take me in his arms before I hit cement ground. Ah! that need to be caught before we fall, not when.  Wonderful.

Lust; of those three months, two of them were spent on another girl's bed. Love; had love been enough for him, he would restrain from cheating on me. Pity; a man that held such supercilious pride could not concern himself with others. Wonderfully done, I loved the preamble too, of things being tossed rather than placed into a basket, accentuating that mess of her head, that she was upon a whim final tidying.

I loved how the writer draws out this long few hours by the depth that they carry, those desires and her their history, so that it is not just a girl upon the brink of fainting BUT a woman's heart upon the precipice of falling or being revived.  Beautifully done.

The second half a glimpse of the outer actions surrounding her and those inward, I ignored the peculiar movements within my heart.

Beautifully written by an accomplished writer.  Very impressive.


Entry number three - sands of time

Excellent dialogues, that flowed naturally.  It was quite fascinating to see her face showing a range of emotions to all that we could speak. Ah! that addendum to the Shannon and Weaver Model. It is all good and well listing the aspects needed for our messages to be given in the most precise and clear manner BUT at the end we rely heavily upon feedback, whether one word, or here a soul lighting up!

I loved the twist, the longest day becoming a consolidation of eras.  Nicely done!

I loved the three excerpts from history. We have religious history, Art history and history from which fiction is made from, or rather hoped by many a reader. Then that last chapter, something more personal.  Profoundly done, like all those books, pieces of art that we surround ourselves with, when in the end our own lives are full of things to keep up well amused, if only we could perceive it.  I loved that last line,

The seconds ticked, the minutes flew, the hours passed; the time raced to end the longest day!

Inspired concept and exceptionally written.

Entry number four, The catharsis 

I really liked the manner a life is the backbone to the narrative, rather than the plot.  As the memories washed over her, she was transported back in time, to those points in time which she would give anything to forget.

Sunitha sat up in bed.  It was no use trying to sleep; her memories would not let her. True, our past rarely let our present be, and yet our present it depended upon them.  

A very well written piece with profound intent that actually delivers.


Entry number five, stranger with a crooked smile.

All her cousins were either too young or too old. The writer not only captured youthful angst of alienation, of the whole world against you, but pinpointed it accurately so that we can relate even though it is also beautifully etched around an individual heart. 

A light tap on the shoulder woke her up. The airhostess informed her that they had arrived at their destination. I loved this line, for sometimes we too breeze through life, sleeping away dreams, rather than living them.  Excellently written catching that breezy aspect of life we create.

Where did he land from?  Absolutely cute and yet wry! Just outstanding! You were the one who was walking with world closed out, not me. From the lips of a stranger, just profound!

That middle section of action, in and amongst the meandering preamble and introduction was expertly weaved in for contrast and effect.  Impressive! Disappeared yet again inexplicably just the way he had come.  I concur!  Just a remarkable piece of prose, a treat to read.

It's a small world, maybe by chance or an accident of fate she will tread on to his course againWhy do we treat each day like a burden, falling out of bed instead of greeting it like the unopened gift that it has always been.  A excellently written, plotted and meaning filled piece. I loved it!

Entry number six, a midsummer's day.

This writer has a wonderful manner of creating endearment towards their characterizations, Just then, my dog got up and came towards me with that look that says, "Talk to me." I smiled at him affectionately and started talking. It is one thing to label something as adorable and quite another to make it so.  Impressive.

The interaction of the characters are just as charming! The meaning of freelancing. Again the writer expertly showcases that it is another thing to create comedy from action and the far superior method from characterizations.  Outstanding!

I loved the colloquial nature of the prose that is quite polished! I don't know what awakened me It is easy to read and yet brilliant too.

The detailing of characterizations that move the plot along, I made a tiny stop to buy an extra pen. Wonderful!

There was thunder and lightning, and a power cut. Echoing that burnt out state of the protagonist!

Excellent piece that reminds us that once the longest day is over we then face its aftermath. An accomplished writer.

Entry number seven -

I loved the introduction.  However more so the surreal nature running through the whole piece. That last line, just inspired. I should have eaten, but so excited was I, that I didn't want to alter the conditions of the previous dream by even one bit now, lest the sequel not come up at all. I switched off the lights and lay down on my bed, as the clock chimed 10 o clock.

I really like the interweaving of other planes into hers. I loved this part, where not only sight but smell is used for dramatic effect, expertly done!

For a few minutes, I went numb as I stared at the plastic bags. Then suddenly, as if without knowing why, as if in a trance, as if hypnotized, I moved my arm ahead and touched one of the plastic bags. I pulled it and held it close to myself, inspite of the horrible stench. It was then that I suddenly came out of my trance.

I loved how the writer reminds us that though sometimes it is our dreams that keep us awake, sometimes the are the reasons for sleep too.  A wonderful writer with excellent wild imagination that mixes the real with surreal.

Entry number eight. - The longest day.

I really like the almost bird's eye view of one the the most important day's in people's lives. The ring now upon the wedding finger, Radha looked away. She had made the commitment, not only her but her groom, her newly announced husband too had just vowed eternal love, protection.  Heart break told simply without embellishment.  Just exquisite!

It was okay to fall in love again, it was okay that she was dancing away, it was okay that she could hold her husband close. Only she didn't seem to see me in the crowds and once the soft music was drowed out by heavy dance numbers left the dancefloor. I loved how the writer shows that after we utter those promises do we begin to act upon them. As someone once said, not until after I uttered those words did I know them to be true. Excellent!

That haunting end that moved my heart many times over.  Well written.

Entry number nine. - One fine day.

I loved the flow of this writer. Their writing ability is wonderful in that it is natural and yet littered with its own character. For instance, who was oblivious to their reason to part ways assumed his natural carefree attitude to be the culprit again. & but feared allowing the possibility at the risk of an awkward twist in their imperfectly perfect partnership Accomplished writing that is so effortless, or seemingly so.

his unsaid confession echoed in her heart Beautiful. A simple tale with much significance.

Wondrous piece of writing.

Entry number ten, Plane Hijack.

I loved the manner the writer in just a few moments turns the fear from one guy to the girl next to him. A sharing of a burden that becomes halved. Although the mixture of light heartedness of the two leads seems oddly out of place it is understandable for we all try to make light of the weighty so that it does not crush us.  It was a difficult concept used by the writer which they handle superbly. One moment she's tensed and the next moment she acts as if she is at home.

Well written and good pace of plot.

Entry number eleven - the fated silver lining.

 Silence' magnifies everything. Every feeling. Emotions. Thoughts. Actions. Decisions. Reactions. Yet, my mind seemed to have stopped working the moment I realized there was nothing left to be said and the endless deafening silence broke in between us. This opening was just magnificent! Laying a fundamental foundation and then pulling it out from under our feet! Silence as something that illuminates the intricate and then becomes a bull loose in a china shop!

unapproachable differences Wondrous words! unmoved for hours. Both spiritually and physically, just beautifully captured! Each slowly passing hour brought different memories of those same two years. Simple yet sophistical. 

I could hear two heart beats; one being mine and the other being his. They seemed to both to compete at first, striving to thump faster by the second. Then, they quietly settled and made peace beautifully written. It is not a case of out of the frying pan and into the fire BUT finding passion in that heat that makes our hearts move and warmth to comfort them.  Well written.

Entry number twelve.   One summer day with Geet.

Short and very, very sweet. I loved that surprise end. I loved how the writer created a flow of anticipation so that we can well imagine the look on Maan's face, at "Happy Anniversary!" "I'm pregnant." Excellently done!

Entry number thirteen - Marrying mr Twenty three,

I loved the natural style of a dear diary prose, exceptionally written.

They can completely trample on your feelings then make you feel guilty about being hurt for their insensitivity. Luckily for me, my dad, who understood me better than my mother, made up for my mother's indiscretions. I love how the writer does not seek pity for their protagonist but understanding, for love is understanding someone's needs above your own need to express your heart's condition. Excellently done!

"Mrs. Rastogi is the second sister of the lady we met at Mr. Parekh's party when we went last December. Excellent detailing, made me chuckle and become charmed too.

Shaadi. Just inspired! I loved it!

"Shaadi?" Almost hear that proposal when he calls her, this first time, an echo of destiny, as arranged by her mother! 😆 Wonderful!

I loved how the writer wove that streak of heart break into Karan.  Oblivious and yet blameworthy obvious too! "Do you ever smile?"She missed her train too.
As one line breaks your heart another comes to mends it.

Regardless of the reason or cause, I found myself at the same place I'd been dropped off by Karan, half an hour later. The only difference was that I was jobless now. This writer is just wonderful and very accomplished too. The writing style is natural, flowing and wonderful to read but the plot, peppered with insight and hindsight makes the whole thing just like those dreams that you awake from and try in earnestness to return too. Just beautiful!

"Are you always this awkward around people or do I just inspire that in you?" I loved the detailing of this character. Peaking at, Your eyes are another matter, though."Your eyes were the ones that made me feel like a jerk that day Not so oblivious after all. I think I may be falling for him. 😳

I don't want you to meet a Mr. Twenty Six. I just loved this. Just sublime! This is the moment I fell in love with him AND I don't give my heart so easily. Wonderfully written and a delight to read, and read again. 😳


Best Story Told  Number five  stranger with a crooked smile.


Best Written Story Number 13, marrying mr twenty three


Best Title Number eleven - fated sliver lining.


Favorite Male Character
Number13. marrying mr twenty three


Favorite Female Character Number six a midsummer's day.


Story You Want To Read Ahead (I did not really have a nomination for this one, since most were finished off well, and only one that seemed as though it could continue, so I would like to leave this blank, if that is all right with the moderators.)

Most Unique Story Number five stranger with a crooked smile.


Favorite Event Wrong flight, number five stranger with a crooked smile.
Edited by a little faith - 12 years ago
amail1601 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
NJ!!!!! I updated my posted on page 2 - just thought I'll let you know in case you miss it - it's the only one there. :P
 
 
Oh n I finally got all my results...except for the final GD/Int. That's next week. Our 'connection' proved lucky. ;)
..kiran.. thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
 
Everybody did an amazing job! Kudos to all for such beautiful entries!! 👏 I really enjoyed reading them all! 😃
 
 
My votes:
 
Best story: #4 (it was the most touching piece, heartbreakingly so)
Best written story: #13 (I just kept re-reading it, and felt completely immersed in it every single time.. absolutely brilliant ⭐️👏)
Best title: #13
Favorite male character: The narrator from #8
Favorite female character: Sunitha from #4
Most unique story: #3 (completely gripping 😲👏)
Story I want to read ahead: #3 😃
Favorite event: #13 (when Karan and Shaadi meet in the balcony.. I was all "aww"😳)
 
 
@ Sabah (a little faith): I honestly think you must write on IF too and participate in the next contest, if you haven't participated in this one. I'm sure you'd write beautifully because you have such a keen understanding of other writers' work - a real eye for details and the subtleties of language.
 
@ NJ: Great work putting all this together 😃 I wish I could have participated as well but I was taken up with work and stuff (mostly stuff). But I'm glad I could read all the fab entries! Thank you for providing such a platform for writers to share their work.