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Chasing a dream - Part 1/Page 3 - 9/06 (Page 3)

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yikes

Senior Member

yikes

Joined: 11 November 2009

Posts: 277

Posted: 09 June 2011 at 9:42am | IP Logged
Originally posted by MrMonster

Oh yes, the day you wake up and realize that you have to tell your parents. The dreaded of every teenagers life. It's been centuries since I've signed on to India-Forums, and the first post I see is yours, how nice.

I did like the beginning. But it didn't really capture my attention, sort of awkward, similar to when you get struck by the seemingly best idea to have ever passed your mind and you kind of pen down with the story running through your head. It's not edited, that much I can tell, but I do like it, and I can't really say more.

I feel like a total jerk for saying that, because you are a good writer and I've seen that in your past stories. Just don't think I'm being mean, I'm just telling the truth. I will say that the story seems interesting and I would like to see how it develops overtime. I love your characters and I would like to love this one as well. Good luck.

@bold - I'm going to be unapologetic and admit that that's what I do, 90% of the time LOL I never plan my stories. Every single part has a different inspiration, a different idea behind it. I get struck by an idea and think, 'hey I need to pen this down!' - yep, this is how I write Tongue

Thanks anyway, I'm glad you love my characters :) Big smile

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yikes

Senior Member

yikes

Joined: 11 November 2009

Posts: 277

Posted: 09 June 2011 at 9:45am | IP Logged
Originally posted by _.serendipity._

Aparajita!! Big smile Big smile
As expected, this is brilliant! Star The concept looks very promising indeed, and I am sure you will do it full justice! It's got that thing, that I loved about 'Solace' too, the fact that you write about stuff that we can so-o-ooo identify with, and just always manage to hit the nail right on the head with the captivating details you subtly weave into narrative.. I'm really, really looking forward to this!!
And as for the style of the prologue in particular, I love the stream of consciousness type thing that you have going. Your writing flows so smoothly, allowing the story to unfold in the reader's mind in such a natural way. I, for one, like the fact that it's got a feel of not having been edited, even though it most probably was. It makes for such effortless entry into the character's world.
And there, you've done it again, hooked me to your story! Big smile
Waiting, waiting, waiting...
 

Hema!! 

Thankyou so much! I guess my ideas take upon a realistic mold because I try to take inspiration from the reality around me. Super duper glad that you liked the prologue, I really want this story to be lighter, with lesser angst. 

:)

yikes

Senior Member

yikes

Joined: 11 November 2009

Posts: 277

Posted: 09 June 2011 at 10:34am | IP Logged
PART 1




"Plea, passe, kick, passe again, and then you put the foot down"



Our dance instructor, Shweta, yelled as she walked around the class, observing everyone like a hawk. I love our instructor, she had acquired the perfect balance in every aspect of teaching - strict yet understanding, funny yet serious, confident yet humble. She's also very inspiring. At the age of 23, she left her high flying job as the HR manager in an MNC to pursue dancing.



Yet, she scares me to death.



I checked my feet again to see if they're in parallel, if my legs were in a proper plea and if my passe looked messy as she came around behind me. I know we learn slowly, and perfection cannot be attained overnight, but the adamant part of my brain always orders me to be overly harsh on myself. Especially when my instructor is around. Especially because, she's the one whose going to promote me to the next level. 



We were doing a lyrical jazz routine this month. The pace was semi-quick and there were various extensions placed at different points of the song. Shweta told us that the extensions were the main part and everything else was mainly filler and was meant to prepare us for the extensions. After a few classes, I realized that I was pretty good at the filler part and sucked at the extensions. Each time I stretched my leg towards the ceiling, I looked like an imbalanced Kung Fu Panda.



I'm quite flexible but I struggle a lot when it comes to balancing oneself in a particular position. I always:



1) Fall down
2) Wobble like a jelly to find my center.
3) Shake my hands around me like I'm drowning. 



I'm struggling right now too. Shweta noticed me hopping around like a madman and walked towards me.



"You need to squeeze your thighs and hips together when you're in a passe position, it helps you to place your weight in your center", she said as she lifted up my arms and tried to straighten my back. I nodded stupidly and tried to follow her instructions. It worked for a second and then I was back to my wobbly self again.



We continued to practice the routine for the remaining part of the class. At the end of it, I was only 0.1% better. 



We gathered around Shweta outside the studio after the class had ended, for a 5 minute chat session. It was a ritual that we followed. After the class got over, everyone was supposed to pick their stuff up and talk to the instructor about that day's class. 



"So guys, do you like this month's routine?", she asked in a cheerful voice. She transforms herself into a completely different person outside the studio.



Everyone murmured a soft 'yes', as though it would camouflage their real sentiment towards the routine. Shweta looked at us and grinned, "I know it's a little tough but you'll get used to it. It's just been 3 classes so far. You need to realize how important extensions are in lyrical jazz"



Again, everyone nodded but hardly seemed convinced. Shweta shook her head lightly and moved on to another topic, "Anyway, so there's an important announcement. As you all know, the summer workshop is approaching and it will begin in two weeks. Registrations are open now and you can come to either me or the studio manager to register yourself"



As though someone had just turned on a yellow light bulb, everyone's faces switched from sulky, tired expressions to 'yay-fun-time!' expressions in a split second. A soft buzz grew within the group, which soon escalated to a loud chatter. Workshops are indeed, fun times. We're taught a choreography which we ultimately go and perform on stage. It's a huge event because all batches, levels and classes perform and there's always a large audience (mostly parents) who come to watch the show. 



I had so far been in one workshop and it had really helped me evolve, both as a dancer and a person. God only knows, my fear of the stage was almost palpable before I performed. Even on the day of the performance, I was shivering like an old typhoid patient who had just walked out of the ICU.



We asked a few more basic questions, and then slowly started dispersing. As I was walking towards the main gate, I thought of the wonderful two months that lay ahead. IF I took part in the workshop. And then I thought of my parents. My hopes plummeted. They were already quite pissed with me, due to my grand revelation. I don't think they'd allow me to participate again.



I had almost reached the main gate when someone called out my name, "Shruti!", I turned around to see a boy in my class, I forgot his name, striding towards me. I looked at him confusedly, 'Yeah?"



"Shruti, right?"



I rolled my eyes, "Yep"



He grinned, "You're going to be promoted soon"



Something in my stomach just did a somersault, "How do you know?"



"I just heard Shweta discussing a few names with our co-instructor. She said you, Neha, Rajat and Meera, might get promoted after the workshop"



Before I could help it, my face broke into a huge, toothy smile and I almost jumped, "Finally! About time. I've been in this batch for almost a year now"



I thanked him for giving me the information and with the smile still plastered on my face, walked out of the main gate. But, suddenly a thought struck me. If Shweta said I might get promoted after the workshop, that means I will have to participate in it in order to finalize the promotion. 



I will have to convince my parents now. At any cost. 


_______________________________________________

Sorry for the delay! hope you liked it :D comment comment Big smile

P.s - I'm going to be using all sorts of dance vocabulary in this story, so in case you feel confused, go through this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_of_ballet


Edited by yikes - 09 June 2011 at 10:53am

The following 4 member(s) liked the above post:

Pooj@ScatteredCastlevidu87U-No-Poo

U-No-Poo

IF-Sizzlerz

U-No-Poo

Joined: 15 June 2007

Posts: 23471

Posted: 13 June 2011 at 8:42am | IP Logged
^_- reserved. 

ScatteredCastle

IF-Dazzler

ScatteredCastle

Joined: 04 February 2010

Posts: 2559

Posted: 15 June 2011 at 10:12am | IP Logged
[center]Hey there! 

I honestly feel amazed at the simply flow of words when it comes to your writing as 'dancer' and not 'writer'. I mean - If it's about a dancer, then it should be from a dancer's POV. I love the fact that you're keeping it simple and to the point - the way it should be from a dancer's perspective -  moving on..

This part was short, indeed. Yet, it kept me intrigued as I went on about reading it. Great start, I must say - this was long awaited, I guess. Liking it so far. Yea, the dancing vocabulary confused me - thanks for the link, though!

Anyways, I love Shruti - for umm, for .. I just like her, there's nothing revealed though, buh' I like her. (:

Alright, so continue .. soon? *I'm sure you know what the word means,eh?*



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