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~..~ Story Day - Read & Vote ~..~[CLOSED] (Page 6)

JaeeDevRathore Goldie

Joined: 21 September 2010
Posts: 1046

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 4:03am | IP Logged
Best Written Story : Entry #11
Best Storyline Plot : Entry #4
Best Character Sketch Male : Entry #4
Best Character Sketch Female : Entry #6
Best Title : Entry #11
Most Unique Story Told : Entry #1
The Story I Wish Could Be Continued : Entry #1

Jaee D. Rathore

Edited by -jaee- - 01 May 2011 at 6:16am

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Sanely_Insane IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 29 August 2010
Posts: 21078

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 5:48am | IP Logged
Read all the entries...and wow so many beautiful stories...i enjoyed reading each and every entry... Good job everyone...Clap

My vote:

Best Written Story: Entry #11

Best Storyline Plot: Entry # 5

Best Character Sketch Male : Hugh from Entry #4

Best Character Sketch Female : Julianne Morse from Entry #5 

Best  Title : The Stranger that stole my life. Literally Entry #9

Most Unique Story Told : Entry #1 ( i didn't expect that ending) 

The Story you wish would continue : Entry #11 

                                                      Good Luck Everyone!!! Thumbs Up

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aish_punk IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 11 January 2008
Posts: 20577

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 6:12am | IP Logged
WOW! all the stories are so amazing. i just finished reading all of them, n im sure this is going to be a really tough decision!
Best Written Story - #Entry 7
Best Storyline Plot - #Entry 9
Best Character Sketch (Male) - Hugh, #Entry 4
Best Character Sketch (Female) - Julianne #Entry 5
Best Title - Falling In Love and Its Consequences # Entry 3
Most unique story told - #Entry 15
The story you wish could be continued - #Entry 11
phew! that was hard! :P but i think everyone did an awesome job, so applause! i really didn't know there were SO many talented writers on IF, i seriously need to hunt them down!
im really excited about the results :D

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Sumi_162710 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 14 September 2008
Posts: 6229

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 12:03pm | IP Logged
Best Written Story : Entry #11
Best Storyline Plot : Entry #3
Best Character Sketch Male : (Hugh) Entry #4
Best Character Sketch Female : (Kajal) Entry #3
Best Title : Entry #11
Most Unique Story Told : Entry #1
The Story I Wish Could Be Continued : Entry #11

A round of applause for all the talented writers!! Gr8 work done by everyone!! ClapClap

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bmtdluver IF-Rockerz

Joined: 21 September 2008
Posts: 9569

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 1:06pm | IP Logged
Best title: The Killer Eyes #3
Best Written Story :  #11
Best Storyline Plot :  #1
Best Character Sketch Male :  #4 (hugh)
Best Character Sketch Female :  #4
Most Unique Story Told : #1 (loved the end!!)
The Story I Wish Could Be Continued : #9

Edited by bmtdluver - 01 May 2011 at 4:20pm

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Thinker_Belle IF-Rockerz

Joined: 31 March 2010
Posts: 5993

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 1:19pm | IP Logged
The contest was super amazing!  All the stories were interesting to read.  Here are my votes:-
Best written story #13 (That was such a difficult excerpt, and the writer did a wonderful job )
Best storyline plot #11
Best character sketch (Male) #11 (Why O why doesn't he have a name?!?!?  He's awesome!)
Best character sketch (Female) Ria, #13
Best title # 9
Most unique story told # 1 (The heroine was the killer!)
The story you wish could be continued  - #13

Goodluck to all participants!

Edited by 10on10 - 01 May 2011 at 11:46pm

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felicitysmoak. IF-Stunnerz

Joined: 05 November 2007
Posts: 44357

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 1:58pm | IP Logged
Best Written Story : Entry #11
Best Storyline Plot : Entry #3
Best Character Sketch Male : (Hugh) Entry #4
Best Character Sketch Female : (Kajal) Entry #3
Best Title : Entry #11
Most Unique Story Told : Entry #1
The Story I Wish Could Be Continued : Entry #11

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a little faith Goldie
a little faith
a little faith

Joined: 09 January 2009
Posts: 2037

Posted: 01 May 2011 at 4:08pm | IP Logged
Entry number 11

Entry number 5

Entry number 11

Entry number 5

Entry number 9

Entry number 13

Entry number 13

It really pinched me that I could not award more recognition to the other pieces, only due to the high calibre of the participants that I had to chose so harshly.  However I would like to mention those other pieces that really showcased other amazing talents, 'The incidental love (entry number7) ; Tell me its written in the sky (entry number8 ).

Thank you to all the writers, I am in awe for story telling is one skill I have not been gifted with unlike yourselves.  Most can 'tell' a story but to tell it well takes skill.  Kudos to you all!

Thank you to topic maker 'spln' for your hard efforts in bringing about this contest.   I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I loved your format which illuminated the myriad of meaning behind sentences and sentiments.

 "Of course you can add remarks in the reply post while you vote. " I hope I did not infer incorrectly.  I just wanted add a few remarks upon the outstanding pieces of prose.  Scrapbook notes which led my cool mind to its crumpled conclusions which my subjective heart subsequently trampled all over so I could not accurately tell you the reasons behind their disheveled appearance or which crease led me where. 

Love Sabah.

The sixth victim.

Just an inspired opening, right into the action, so we are in the middle before we know it had already begun. I liked the apt metaphors, 'I was jittery and felt as if someone was walking over my grave,' and 'which turned steely grey.' I liked the use of details to describe facts, 'The small alarm clock next to my bed showed 8:45 and the open window told me that it was morning.'

That last paragraph was excellently paced and expounded.  Was it safe to walk alone along this path? True, the difference 24 little hours make, or one moment or one turn of the heart!

I liked that open ended conclusion, was this deep seated fear all along just trepidation of being caught? Or did he really not know anything at all?  Alienation from the self is the most fearful thing in this world.  I liked reading this piece. I also learned a new word.Big smile

Entry Number Two.

I like the fast pace of the narrative enhancing the arrhythmic and erratic style of our thoughts which lead us from here to there and back again.  The to and fro between minds was clear and finely done.   I loved that 'Little Red Riding Hood moment?'What about the ears? Big? Small? Flat? wonderful! Star Then those twists that spun us back to the beginning, well almost.

Falling in love and its consequences.

I liked the title, spinning the order around so that in the narrative 'its consequences' comes first.  I loved that 'tell a story' contrivance! Just Inspired! StarHe was a daring knight who had as much control over his horse as his looks had on young women.  Brilliant! Arjun, who had never climbed up pipes in his entire life, struggled in his first attempt. It took him a good ten minutes to even get a grip on the pipes.They make it look so easy on TV. LOLWonderful segment.

Miracle of Love.

I liked the notion.they wanted to work together to save this girl' Ultimately it is not about who gets the girl romance but that 'she' has love in her life.  All those people who love her, binding her to this earth, keeping her faith safe.  I loved that poem too.

Killer Eyes,

I really liked the different use of the excerpt.  The history and characterization of the protagonist.  The opening scene was vivid, the description making the repugnance of the 'killer' all the more real, which is saying something after film and tv de-sensitizing.  The flashback in the middle was terrifying and excellently written.

The overall tension and detailing of facts, so that we too seek the killer in all her acquaintances.  Nicely done.

Made in heaven

The dialogues flowed wonderfully and wittily, through the excerpt too, rather than around it. Things were surely changing, and most alarmingly, without my consent.Star Sharp characterizations, though not entirely Mayank and Nupur of MJHT but still MayUr, if you follow my drift.

The incidental love.

An epic piece. Wonderful jump from the excerpt. This time it was his turn to take a sip of water from the glass. Star That wondrous precipice between awkward and terror falling down an unexpected third avenue of desire. Thinking well outside the box! Star I loved those flow of contrasts throughout. The action was gruff, but his voice was gentle; A giggle escaped from me. I quickly choked on it; it led to a fit of hiccups'  calling him up asking for help and Iam making small talk. I loved the unique and very precise terms to capture accurately every nuance 'Petrichor/Damocles Amazing! Very knowing!

Like a bullet racing out of the gun,piercingly written.Star 

Tell me its written in the sky.

Obviously a wonderful use of the excerpt! Enthralling and impressive. I loved the poetic style of the prose, whereby the excerpt becomes a contrasting narrative in poetic form. Star I do not know if I am to infer that this is 'Frank' but regardless of whose heart is pouring out it was a pleasure to read it.  Beautiful.

The stranger who stole my life. Literally.

Great title AND great opening line! Star From there on in, I could not see past oncoming series of 'corners' or very tightly bent curves!  Really very finely done! Star

It was like it was in my head, yet from him.I liked this weird sentiment, captured wonderfully.  Unlike the protagonist who accepted both her dream and awoken states, I kept awakening into an eerie dream, the preamble to impending nightmare.  It wasn't that she was dim witted, naive or silly but rather forced by the river of time to flow within its currents and whirlpools.  That relief when you just stop struggling and drown into something sublime. Cleverly done! I would have followed BUT I am not as courageous.the bell that would finally lead to the making sense of my upside-down, wrongway-round life

There were two figures, one at mercy and one at malice. Well written. Star

Spice of life.

Whoa, that was an emotional ride.  Lovely opening line, the circling aspect of life and women in a man's life.  Really good dialogues that narrated as well as adding depth. The development of Armaan is nicely done.

Coincidental concurrence.

The opening paragraph intimated at the high calibre of style but in truth the further I progressed, I was still 'astonished' at the depth of substance and delicate form that whispers, not watered down and yet find a way through past your guarded bounds.  Very much impressed.  Exceptional writing! Star

The remarkable details that are embroidered upon with silken threads of thoughts. Normally I'd muse on the irony on the tragic state of what remained, and remark on how in my cynical point of view it was very similar to what a marriage represented. Shining, glowing lights and loud noises that fizzle out into darkness and an uncomfortable silence. Today I offered no cynicism.

Those peculiar universal habits, No one in their right mind would be out at three in the morning in the middle of nowhere, with still no idea how to get home. "I'm not mad." LOL

The playing with words, '"You're more under dressed than I am." As he toys with her.  That slow build up of the narrative, keeping details so close to the narrator's chest (considering their bindas reputation is no small feat) so that even though by entry number 11, I knew all the excepts by heart, I did not see this one coming.  So beautifully woven in. And if irony had to find a situational synonym - it lay in the fact, that she and I were professional match makers. As partners, not rivals.

"You really think trusting a couple whose main focus probably is jumping in a warm bed, most probably together, most probably in the biblical sense, is the best judgment?" Wonderfully written line. Each nuance made me laugh harder.Star

WOnderful first meeting, So I thought she was the lucky girl who no longer had to date my jerk of a friend. She thought I was the ill-fated boy whose heart was going to be broken by her friend. In the end, when the misunderstandings cleared, we laughed, and found ourselves becoming fast friends. I like the intricate weaving of the excerpt into their history, elegantly done! For example the very fine 'I had the full rights to right it the way I wanted 'Cause hello, this is my story.' The best occurrence 'I don't plan on including her but she has to, as a rule, barge her way into every notable aspect of it. It's almost unplanned yet feels like it was a set-up all the while. It sure beats the hell out of me... how she does it. All the damn time! 'StarStarStar

That end weaved so profoundly, not the merest hint of a yarn spun. 

To hell and back.

I loved the colloquial style that remained stylish.  Excellent witty quips, I hadn't mysteriously died; the metal toilet doesn't count as I refuse to acknowledge its existence, The abruptness added to the tempestuous tone throughout.  Excellent.

Her 'n' Him

The characterizations where a rare find.  Wondrous. He had always had somewhat of a penchant for obviousness, to the detriment of any sliver of subtlety that he potentially possessed.

The wonderful contrivance pattern of truth-untruth-truth-untruth beautifully expounded 'they conned people as well: to start with truth and end on an untruth.

Again that inventive pattern 'Mingling with the locals. Followed by mimesis. Followed by measurement. followed by exceptional explanation, The mingling was the preparation, the mimesis was the implementation, and the measurement, the test that was crucial to ascertain whether she was ready

That ending, superb! Big smile

The even more, most dangerous game.

Then when she thought that kid who randomly walked upto me at the amusement park was my son! 6 weeks of insanity that caused!"  wonderful.  Then even more so,"To be fair," Rob inserted, "he called you Papa, and he did have the same ridiculous Billy Ray Cyrus hairstyle you were sporting at the time." Wonderful! Star Then that final sentiment that reminds me men are all bark no bite.Embarrassed

The eyes

I like the theme of 'eyes' in this piece, gluing the scene together, encircling the narrative bringing it back to the beginning. Very well done. Star

Unknown territory/

I really liked the excellent use of language. ' If anything it only further intensified the explosion of light and pain that now was running through my head like arcs of swirling fire. The excellently weaving of 'is he or isn't he the eyes?' Star

The eyes

One word, 'Chilling.'  Seriously very well written, I had goosebumps and all.

Edited by a little faith - 01 May 2011 at 4:09pm

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