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Entwined: Part16A : Yere Yere Pausa : 31Aug11 (Page 3)

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GauravsDbest

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GauravsDbest

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Posted: 20 April 2011 at 1:07pm | IP Logged
The first part gave me goosebumps and tears, the rest were pure magic...i love the titles too!!!I love how u explained the last title!!!Awesome job!Any compliment will be an understatement!

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skorpion

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skorpion

Joined: 29 December 2006

Posts: 961

Posted: 27 April 2011 at 6:56am | IP Logged

Originally posted by Preeths609

panna..omg ..dis ff is magical..a very diff view of things,... i ve never read anytng quite so like dis..thankx so much 4 updating it aftrr a year..well worth de wait

n sameer hitler lolz ...poor guy...n i really luv de story line..awesum..keep updating...i  am hooked to dis ff nw

Hey thanxxX for liking da update.
anyfink to do wod PriDa... is jusnoutta da world... n we fans are unanimous nin dat verdict :))
Fora change i wanted Sameer in a whole diff avatar... hence am trying to work a diff persona for him as Sr Saxena now... lets see how it works out.



Originally posted by Nan08

Panna..Wonderful updateStarStarStar

i liked the name Dharini too ..n googled n found out Tarit means lightning.. u hav interchanged the names wowww simplyyy wowwwBig smile good going... thnks again for not abandoning this story n moving it forward.. loving the storyyy ...Thumbs Up

BINGO Nandini !! i fell in love wid da names as PriDa... and sumhow wanted to work wid da same names... but den da story of a *DIFF* couple was to be written... so cudna use da Prithvi and Damini again Hence dis interchange... (((Dis is mah attempt to imagine dem in a whole NEW show in a diff setup))) glad u noted da meaning of da names.


Originally posted by jakhushi

" Mere Khwabon mein jo Aye...Aake mujhey Tadpaye...Usseh Kaho kabhi saamne toh aye" ...err preferably without a paperweight in handLOL.

U bet Khushwaa U bet !!
Hmmmhari zindagi me aao to zaroor... par toofan banke nahi eh is da general message shared here :p

Interesting...veryyy intersting update. Liked the way you picked the names and that chup chup ke attraction has placed its seed in Tarit...leading him towards his *D*estiny.
*D* sure is for Destiny...HEHEHE
 
Really glad that atlast someone could "direct" enough guilt in you to pick this up again..Wink i know !! well... Kwhaish sure did ruffle a few feathers in mah mind...
 
Khushi.


Originally posted by crazypridaholic

Panna...
 
Like dis part Star...Dharini n Tarit's first move t/w dere Destiny...!!! Interesting story...lots of possibilities...as Khwaish said...Vill story repeat itself once again...!!! U build up lot of suspense here...m totally hooked ClapClap...!!! Plzz update Soon...!!!
Lets see how da story UNFOLDS
n if i can do sum justice to da track...

 
 
Aabhaas...Beautiful word...Reminded me of marathi song...*Aabhaas Ha*...m humming it frm d moment I read d title Embarrassed...!!!

^^ jus googled it n liked da tune...

On a very very very SIDE not:
u n Amiya... i am sure while studying... NEVER had problemo filling PAGES writing exam papers... tum dono ke comments me...
*!!* ke baad itne *SPACEBAAR* mene kisi aur ke
nahi dekhe hai aajtak :P
 
-Nitika



Originally posted by GauravsDbest

OMG!!!This is the first time i read ur ff and i got completely hooked! Believe me i have never been so taken in by any story before!!!
The first part gave me goosebumps and tears, the rest were pure magic...i love the titles too!!!I love how u explained the last title!!!Awesome job!Any compliment will be an understatement!
Hey der' glad u liked it n thanxxX for sharing ur thots :):)



An small Update coming soon... 
Part 5 *Smriti*

untill next time'
skorpion

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Khwahishamiya121..Waves..GauravsDbest...San-Yo...Ann_92jakhushiNan08

skorpion

Senior Member

skorpion

Joined: 29 December 2006

Posts: 961

Posted: 27 April 2011 at 6:16pm | IP Logged

Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart

PriDa SS: Entwined part 05 Smriti

Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart


~~ Tera saath hai kitna pyara kam lagta hai jeevan saara tere milan ki lagan me
Hmmmhe aana padegaa dunia me dobaara ~~


Maa must have used dis car last, Tarit groaned as he started da car towards da farmhouse

Wot a beautiful meaningful song Dharini smiled as she sat belted in da passenger seat, as da car ate up da miles. Doctors orders were to take rest. Few days in da city n already a hospital visit. she had no choice but to accompany her boss to da Saxena farmhouse as his assistant.
Sr Saxena had visited yesterday n xplained everything to her. Dunno why she had agreed but here she was, sitting next to her brooding boss on a sunday morning.

She watched his profile from da corner of her eye as he drove silently tapping his fingers on da wheel in sync wid da song.
Her eyes caught a glint off his stainless steel watch dat flanked his strong wrist.
His hands looked like he worked out at a gym, probably flirting wid da local female population !!
His nose jutted out like a parrot. She wondered if it was a result of a fight bak in college.
Wondering how he wud have been in his teens. Wud he have been rebellious like her??
His fashion sense surely suggested he was still rebelling.
i mean who wore sage and parrot green checked trousers...
Sunday was no excuse to defy da fashion gods in such an atrocious manner
Dharini had a grin moment in her mind but she didna let it show on her face.

He felt her gaze at him as he drove da miles but he wasna gonna look at her.
Looking at her reminded him of da way she looked in dat hospital bed
wid her gown around her ... He cleared his throat in a reflex action.
On reaching da Farmhouse he was so gonna dump her on da doorstep and go get busy.
He had no intentions wotsoever to help her take care of herself. In dat department she was on her own !!

She turned her face to da left da moment he cleared his throat.
She slid da window pane down. The breeze hit her face like a soothing balm clearing all da webs dis brooding boss was weaving around her. A few minutes of dry breeze and she felt drops of water mist her face.

She grinned and put her hand out as raindrops started trickling down on da windshield
Tarit started da vipers to clear da view ahead. Da vipers swished creating a rhythm
Her mind started singing a tune. She had never heard da song before yet her mind went about humming, and da words flowed out in a whisper through her glossed lips...

~~ Listen to da falling rain Listen to it fall
And wid every drop of rain I can hear you call
Call mah name right out loud
I can hear above da clouds
And I am here among da puddles
You and I together huddle
Listen to da falling rain Listen to it fall ~~

JEEZ !! he looked up at da roof of da car...den turned towards her.
Ms Prim and Proper cud deffo recite a poem !!
for dis deffo was da worst rendition of ANY song he had ever heard.

HAHAHA--- he cudna help but laugh out loud, making her turn towards him.
She stared angrily at him for a few seconds. realizing a tad late dat she had recited da words in da worst tune possible ever, Aloud. They both stared at each other angrily. It felt like 2 matadors are locking horns jus before a stampede !!

Den he winked. She stared for a couple more seconds, eventually she smiled back.
yuP she knew she cudna sing to save her life !!
The car filled wid her laughter and sumhow he wondered why he suddenly understood da meaning of da words *I feel good*
His hand touched da power window switch on his side still watching her laugh
As da window slid down gush of rain came in and misted his face
He put his hand out and gathered a few drops of water in his palm... da cool drops making an imaginary sizzle on his warm palm... and den outta blue splashed it on her face.

She screamed n closed her eyes shut still facing him...
den she opened dem and he saw a world full of mischief dancering in fronto him

"Oh no u didna" !! he heard her say... as she put both hands outta da window to gather a few drops to splash him. wen da water hit his face sumhow he felt she had touched him...
and he tried warding off her hands with his left hand, still keeping his eyes on da road ahead

Wen Tarit stopped da car, she splashed more water on him.
Tarit killed da engine turning towards her in his seat.
She heard da CLICK sound a second before she turned and tried opening da door.

"So, Ms Prim and Proper !! wanna play Holi now??" He drawled as he slid slightly in her direction. placing his right elbow against da wheel.
Dharini pushed herself back against da door, knowing he had locked dem in...
"Oka oka... i am sorry. i was jus jesting" she heard herself apologise.

He kept bending towards her, his eyes boring deep into her mischievous ones.
but suddenly he stopped midway. his world swayed on its axis.
a silent pause followed. den his head dipped low... and his gaze fell on her parted lips
den down at da purple V of her sleevless vest... dat she had worn on a crisp white full sleeve shirt down... down... den on HIS chest... and dats wen he noticed her 2 hands against his white shirt. Da rain coming in da window had drenched his white shirt making it transparent...
and he cud feel da heat from her petite hands warming his...

He coiled back and away from her, faster den a priest seeing Satan on Friday da 13th !!
wot had he been thinkering. Dis was his assistant. he had to work wid her in da future.
He had no business crossing lines wid her. Never. *He will never* let himself get carried away again like dis. And he had every intention stick to his statements !!

He touched da key, den on an impulse ran his fingers tru his wet hair and slid da windows shut
Den he started da car as if nuffin had ever happened.

Dharini knew da small glimpse she had seen of her flustered boss was lost.
She sighed silently and looked out of da window taking in da picturesque surroundings.
Gone was da momentarily carefree man wid fire dancering in his eyes, only to be replaced by icicles of cold stoney silence.

"We are here", he finally broke da silence as de slowed down on reaching da property line.
As da car cruised through da winding driveway, all she cud do was stare ahead.
Da rain had stopped and da sun was peeping across da tall trees.
She cud see a beautiful rainbow arching around da most beautiful farmhouse she had ever seen. Never had steel n cement blended so beautifully as de had here on da Saxena property.
Da sheer magnificence of architecture n grandeur at display was mesmerising

He opened da door and walked away towards da back of da car while Dharini collected herself.
Getting outta da car, she started taking small steps towards da flight of stairs leading to da tall grand 10 foot double doors. Da door knocker itself screamed *Made of brass wid gold overtones* The facade had huge glass windows and she cud see Blue curtains hung in cascading drapes to frame da glass architecture.

Wer was he?? as she turned around, she noted a diff person parking da car.
wer was Mr Brooding Saxena?? shud she go on alone?? shud she wait for him??
But she barely had time to come to a conclusion coz fate decided to break da heel of her most expensive shoe at dat very moment.

"Holy crapola n all finks bad" !! Manolo Blahnik be damned, she mouthed silently, looking at her broken shoe heel. Glad for a moment, dat her grouchy boss was not around to hear her swear
ufff,  dis was such a bad omen, she muttered under her breath but disminor mishap wasna gonna stop her from climbing da flight of stairs. she bent and removed her shoes, holding dem in her hand, picking up her bag, she started up da stairs slowly taking in da granduer before her.

Da double doors opened on her approach, as a lady smiled wid warmth at her.
"Ah Dharini maam, please do come in. Please make urself comfortable" reminding Dharini, dat if  her mother was well enuff to talk, she wud sound like dis...

Maam?? on hearing da word, da smile dat spread on Dharini's lips was a natural.
no one had called her a maam before she beamed wid pride and self respect.

She took 2 steps forward hesitantly... Only a step divided her and da vast beauty dat lay ahead.
She was suppose to stay here?? for a whole week?? Da Upper Gods must be liking her a lot !!

The inviting living hall beyond da double doors stood a gud 25 ft in height
She strained her neck up far and wide as she bent down to place her duffel bag and shoes on da floor. A tiny frown marking da beauty of her face adding to da small white bandage on her forehead.

Beyond her horse view, Flanked on both da sides wer 2 huge winding staircases dat lead to a common ballustrade n topped by almost 12 ft wide Crystal chandelier dat glittered like molten lava in da bright sunshine, dat poured in from da huge 6 ft tall glass windows based high up near da ceiling for such an effect. WOW. dis was sum house. She grinned in awe. knowing in da nite da Moon shone down da same windows n created a galaxy of stars right in da middle of dis huge room.

Wait-a-min... how did dat thot come into her mind ??
how did she know, how da room looked after sunset ??
But before she wondered or questioned herself.. da uniformed maid touched her arm n gestured her to enter.

Dharini took a big breath... a very big breath n raised her right feet to cross da thresh-hold.
Sumwer in da background, she heard bells ringing... De had been ringing since she had stepped out of da car but she was too engrossed in her surrounding to hear dem clearly.

Bells...Temple bells?? was da last thot as her world swayed.
Closing her eyes for a second, still head turned up towards da chandelier...
She started to fall back as darkness blinded her vision...

So he wanted to see da stable and had left da car running at da base of da steps.
He stumbled across sumfink jus as da bell started ringing in da far distance.
Turning around to see which annoying stone had done da honours to trip him.
His gaze fell on his assistant hesitantly climbing da stairs alone wid a bag and shoes in hand
He needed to get her settled first before he ventured out to da stable, so he started bak towards da steps.

He started climbing up, taking 2 steps at a time towards her, feeling sum wierd unexplained energy flowing around him. But cudna pinpoint wer it was coming from.
He saw her lifting her right leg over da threshold. He also saw her looking up at da huge chandelier on da ceiling. The stumble was imminent !! He knew it. However before he cud warn her,she swayed and started falling bak. In a jiffy, he was by her side before she hit da floor

His left hand slid around her back and his right hand went under her knees, and to balance himself better, took a step ahead wid his right leg. His strong arms lifting her carefully.

Unknown to dem, De both had taken der first step together across da threshold.
Her vision miraculously cleared and Dharini looked around towards Tarit in confusion. A tiny frown mirroring her thots.

"I wont let u fall on mah watch. Dad will skin me alive if dat happens again" Tarit added sarcastically, reminding dem of her now infamous fall at his office
Dharini searched her mind for a quick comebak as he helped her stand and walked off in a huff towards da open study on da right, but words failed her miserably.

Both of dem wer unaware of da glance de got from da old lady watching all dis wid a sly grin.
Nor did both of dem notice da bell ringing had receded slowy...


Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart


Smriti in marathi means a Memory

a memory of coming to a decision
a memory of starting a new journey
a memory of feeling an emotion towards a stranger
a memory of a few raindrops on ur upturned face
a memory of feeling da breeze caress ur hair
a memory of a warm body beneath ur hands
a memory of a clean shaven brooding face
a memory of da eyes dat dwell deep into urs
a memory of da first few steps wid a sense of Deja Vu
a memory of being in an unventured room
a memory of a tinkling bell in da far distant
a memory of being carried over
a memory of a beating heart under a cheek
a memory of coming to an understanding in life
a memory of facing new horizons wid zeal
a memory of fighting ur fate
a memory of being left alone

smriti ji kadhi olakhta yet naahi pan ji manaat rutoon basli aste
dis OS is dedicated to one such memory.
skorpion.




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Khwahish

Senior Member

Khwahish

Joined: 04 February 2010

Posts: 597

Posted: 27 April 2011 at 11:13pm | IP Logged
yay !..first to comment ..2 times in a row !!!

superb update panna ...

the car drive ...their little fight was so kiddish nd innocent ..nd you included the "table cloth pants" here too ..but thank godd the cutlery set wali yellow shirt was kept outLOL ...white shirt is goood ...Embarrassed

waise do they (tarit - dharini) look lyk priDa...just curious !!

i thnk we shld find a name fr this couple ...

it cud me TaNi (TArit -- dhariNI)

or TaRini...or DhaRit...u tell ..ur gud wid names ..

so now they r in the famhouse and the "bells r ringing" in their minds ...intresting...

nd there is stable ovr there too...very intrestingBig smile
i guess toofan is gonna make his toofani entry in the nxt update ..or u gonna rename him tooLOL

cant w8 ..update SOON

luv
khwahishSmile


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...San-Yo...

Goldie

...San-Yo...

Joined: 13 January 2010

Posts: 2462

Posted: 28 April 2011 at 2:23am | IP Logged
ENTWINED UPDATED...Panna,You just killed us with this painful SS.. CryCry you killed PriDa... But glad you continued with this one after long timeSmile.. And this SS is so hatke written, with beautiful yet heart-aching events...
 
SUMONE SUMWER MAY BE HAPPY IN DA THOT DAT YOU ARE STILL BREATHING.MAYBE UN-KNOWINGLY, U R BREATHING FOR DEM...Loved these lines.. Brilliant to the core..
 
New faces with new names and Ringing bells... Just one awesom-mazing girl you are, bringing PriDa magic back with them.. It's gonna be magical thing, like that never read before...
 
Titles are interesting, not much familiar with all the words and pronouncing them.. but thanks for pannalogy dictionary Big smile
 
 
 
Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart

PriDa SS: Entwined part 05 Smriti

Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart x ----- x Heart



~~ Tera saath hai kitna pyara kam lagta hai jeevan saara tere milan ki lagan me
Hmmmhe aana padegaa dunia me dobaara ~~

This song synced so well with your SS..sigh..
Loved the whole car drive sequence and then Dharini's second fall.. awww.. and temple bells ringing.. truly awesome, and its f
lawless..

Looking forward, who's gonna make entry and what next.. strictly looking forward to thisSmile..

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Nan08

IF-Sizzlerz

Nan08

Joined: 14 September 2010

Posts: 20053

Posted: 28 April 2011 at 4:33am | IP Logged
Panna...

Wonderful update again.. after reading this part i could relate to the word "smriti".. what to say... it was like some things that u see seem sooo familiar but u wont b able to place it in a way which makes sense.. like a sixth sense r rather deja vu wud b a better choice of word i think .. hope am not confusing u.. really liked dis part of the update...

btw cn anyone pls translate this pls "smriti ji kadhi olakhta yet naahi pan ji manaat rutoon basli aste"

i cud undrstand sm words but not get the meaning of it as a whole sentence..pls can anyone help :)

again Panna thnks for such a FANTASTIC update :)

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amiya121

amiya121

Senior Member

amiya121

Joined: 06 April 2010

Posts: 582

Posted: 28 April 2011 at 5:27am | IP Logged
Pannaa   my Dear   !!     HugHug
 
 
 
What a Super Fantabulous Fairy Tale you are giving us    !!   StarClapClapStar 
 
Totally Loooved this Update ... was imagining everything in my Head and Grinning and Sighhhing with Pleasure throughout    !!      HeartHeartSmileDay Dreaming
 
Absolutely Loved the Car journey... So Dharini is not harbouring any hard Feelings for the " Welcome with the Paper weight "   that she received from her Boss... but infact has already started admiring him ... Well if he wears that Brooding , Intense look , then i guess i can not really blame her   !!     WinkBig smile   
 
Loved the way you have described how she was Gazing at him...  ' Strong wrist ... going to the Gym and flirting with the Female population ...  ""       LOLLOL    
 
and his determination to not look at her despite being fully aware of her Gaze ...Tooo Goood !!
 ( and i can so imagine him with that slight , Smug , satisfied Smirk ... very slight  )    EmbarrassedBig smile  and then remembering her in the Hospital Gown ... err...umm...somethings are better left Unsaid...ahem ahem...WinkBig smile
 
then both of them feeling the Magic of the Raindrops  !!         HeartDay Dreaming    
Aaahhh... splashing each other, letting their Guard down for a few Joyous Moments,  becoming two Carefree, Innocent Kids... Delightful   !!   Smile
 
and suddenly there is a Switch ... The atmosphere gets charged and one can feel the Crackling Current in the Air around them as he leans towards her and looks Deeply into her eyes ...SIZZLING   !!    Heart    Brrillliant Writing   !!     StarClap
 
So Finally they reach GM...oops.. Saxena Farmhouse Big smile  and the  " Bells have started  Ringing " for both of them...  Loved the description of the Grandeur of the house ...especially the part about the " Star Spangled Ceiling ... "   LOVELY   !!      Star
 
The Ways in which you explained the meaning of  " SMRITI " and earlier " AABHAAS "  StarStar
 
 
and now that you have got us Hoooked sooo Completely to this Fascinating Tale , you have to feed our Hunger regularly and give us Quick Updates    !!     Big smileBig smile
 
 
Thanks a ton  for such a  Super Duper Awesome  Story   !!    
 
 
 
 
Love
 
Amiya
 
 
 
P.S   :   So you caught on to my  " Strategy " of filling up the pages   !!     LOLLOL


Edited by petunia121 - 28 April 2011 at 5:29am

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Ann_92

IF-Dazzler

Ann_92

Joined: 02 February 2010

Posts: 4087

Posted: 28 April 2011 at 6:58am | IP Logged
pmg luvly update panna...totally luved it

de rain sequense was jus magical man...i luved de part wen he let himself go n dey had sum fire :)))

tarit s totally old sam...lolz...poor avni both husban n son r nauatnki..but really missing prida

dis was a superb update..wish i could see dat mansion :)...i luved de entire update esp de fall n wen tarit caught her awww

awesum job panna...i luv dis ff

n de titles r really meaningful...luv ur writing style

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