Guys The entire Commentary I typed got lost in the infinite world of INTERNET . Too tired to retype , I choose today to reply to some interesting questions raised on the Dharmesh issue in PR . Many yesterday did not like the fact that I did NOT suggest an alternative for Vaishali to DECLINE Dharmu's money and instead opt to bring the child up on her OWN BALBOOTA . Some felt my comments 'reeked of materialism and pettiness' . I wish to clear away some misunderstandings about MY views on this subject and explain Why I said what I said .
Kools is so firebrandish and yet she didn't even suggest an alternative for spitting on Dharmesh's money and bringing up child totally on her own was the zapped reaction of many . Simple darlings . I didn't BOTHER to suggest it coz this serial is TOO regressive by ALL standards . Its a serial where the PURITY of woman is vouched for by making references to her VIRGINITY [ Manav vouching for Archana's virginity to Jai} , where TOLERATING ABUSE from SASURAAL is regarded as the TEST of a PATIVRATA woman [ Archana and Vandu } and PATI is regarded as PARMESHWAR and marraige is for LIFE is the unspoken law [ Vandita and Archana again } . Why would I bother to WASTE my energy in even suggesting something that will NEVER bE SHOWN in this idiotic serial ?
Archana has finished her education .........is she WORKING and helping Manav in his business ? NO .
Vandu must have graduated by now , is she WORKING ? Nope .
Varsha is WORKING only coz she has no BACHCHA and according to PR standards.... .NO REAL GOAL . Mind u these r not MY opinions , these r PR standards . The moment she gets Bachcha she will give up job .
Manju is the EXCEPTION . But AH ! Notice that Manju is THE VILLAIN .
Working women r frowned down in PR . They r the ones who want TOO MUCH FREEDOM and NO STRINGS LIKE BACHCHAS and GHAR PARIVAAR . So Varsha , Manju r BAD . Varsha Aborts Bachcha and Manju does MONEY MONEY and is GREEDY .
Never saw Vaishu even OPTING to work . Not before marraige , nor AFTER marraige . Never saw her making a career choice .......whatever she is , I saw Varsha always returning to work . Didnt see Vaishu telling Dharmesh that if Archana can work in his factory , Why Can't I coz I am better educated than her and can save u labour expenses of a HIRED HELP .
And NOW this very pregnant Vaishu is gonna walk on roads posting her RESUME with ZERO WORK EXPERIENCE , bachcha wobbling in her tummy coz suddenly she has decided to be SELF RELIANT ? Well dears looks like her timing for starting from scratch SUCKS . It will be months before she FINDS a job with zero experience unless Satish or someone gives a hand and even THEN her pay will be very very BASIC .
Is that sufficient for HER and BACHCHA ? And ALL this Mind u .......if she DOES TRY to find a job . I still Don't see any URGE . BTW which company do u think will HIRE her in mid pregnancy knowing she will just in some months go on maternity leave ? I haven't seen such KIND , Human oriented Companies . They look for such personnel that enhance THEIR output with LESS leaves as posible .
Ok , JOB VOB MILEGA TAB MILEGA . Let us see the OPTIONS that Vaishu has if she decides to SPIT on Dharmu's money to Show SELF RESPECT . She Stays at MAAIKA , of course . At whose expense ? MANJU's expense . Coz Manohar's pension is dangling in a COURT CASE , Sulo never worked , Vinod is OUT of a JOB and dependent on WIFE . Manju Runs the house with HER SALARY is the answer .
So NOT DEPENDING ON DHARMESH means DEPENDING ON MANJU . It means staying shamelessly at maaika bearing Manjus taunts . How does MANJU feel about bearing the extra expenses of a nanand and to top it HER CHILD is WELL KNOWN . We all saw today how Manju advised her NOT to be hasty and take a divorce and to plonk herself THERE , on HER .
Can u blame Manju ? Not really . Hers is ONE Salary ..........she has Two kids of HERS to feed besides Husbands family and Hubby aint contributing nowdays . Their Savings r fast diminishing .
Why shud claiming CHILD SUPPORT from Dharmu be seen as ZERO SELF RESPECT ? To show SELF RESPECT first one needs to get a good grip and see if one can AFFORD SELF RESPECT . Madhuri cannot afford it today coz CANCER treatments r expensive and her receptionist job wud NOT be sufficient for them . Dharmu's money HELPS . He did not decline providing , so she TOOK THEM for the sake of her child . SELF RESPECT is a value that one can TOM TOM on a FULL STOMACH and if one is BRIMMING with health . If one is affliced by a deadly disease and if one Has not EARNED A SINGLE PENNY in her life , What self respect can he or she THINK about ? SPitting on DHarmu's money and LIVING OFF MANJU till job is found is SELF RESPECT ? pah !!!!!!!
The other option is going to JEEJOO Manav or JEEJOO Satish's house . They r good men ........they will bear expenses since Vaishali never earned a penny and her parents r currently looking at Manjus face with spread out palms for THEIR daily THAALI .
Is THAT self respect ? Taking money from JEEJOOS ? I think NOT . One Jeejoo 's reputation was dragged thru the MUD for staying with him for so long . Was that SELF RESPECT ..........continuing to stay there ALTHOUGH it happened ? Coz Vaishu continued living there as SHE HAD NO OTHER PLACE TO GO TO .
And hence , the REALITY CHECK guys here is GRAB whats DUE TO YOU .........its not BHEEK that Dharmu will give ...........its Vaishu's RIGHT . He is ENTITLED to give it to her .....He cannot walk away saying HELL I wont take RESPONSIBILITY . The answer shud be YOU JOLLY WELL WILL ....... WHETHER U LIKE IT OR NOT .
Some thought that This is PETTY . Punishing Dharmu is NOT what Vaishu shud be after , He will get his KARMIC DUES .She shud make a clean break and move on coz in the process of extracting rightful compensation from him , he will always be a part of Vaishus life and will SPOIL it every time .
How will Dharmu get his Karmic dues if Vaishali does the same thing that Madhuri did ...........if All The women do this each time he impregnates them and walks off to remarry ? If they say Oh well , He is OUT of our LIFE na , GOOD , Punishing him aint our responsibility , Let him go to hell , We will start afresh ..............What will happen to men like DHarmu ?
They will walk SCOT FREE . They will go on to ruin many other womens lives . Madhuri's acceptance of his bigamy let him ruin Vaishus life say many .So wont this be true of Vaishu as well if he marries another woman , UNPUNISHED ?
The only Punishment that pinches HIS THICK SKIN is money being taken away from him . He will think THRICE before marrying YET another woman .
The money shud be claimed NOT FOR PUNISHING HIM PETTILY or coz ONE HAS ZERO SELF RESPECT AND NO OPTIONS but coz thats RISING ABOVE UR SELF ..........So that U send the message to others and also to ur inner self that NO ONE CAN TRAMPLE OVER ME AND GO SCOT FREE WHEN I DID NOTHING WRONG . WHATS MORE , I WILL HALT HIM IN HIS SPREE OF TRAMPLING OTHER INNOCENT VICTIMS . He CAN"T just screw me , impregnate me and walk off grinning like he did yesterday saying TO HELL WITH U . I may DONATE that money to an orphanage , but Ill take him down for EVERY DIME .
Self Respect can be inferred in THIS WAY TOO . If What I suggest reeks of PETTINESS and MATERIALISM .........Saying NO I DONT WANT A DIME COZ NA I HATE HIM HATE HIM HATE HIM and na I don't WANNA Do ANYTHING with him [ all this when Im earning ZERO btw] this reeks of CHILDISHNESS , pardon me . Coz then U havent explored ur other options ..........its LIVING OFF MANJU , SATISH , Or MANAV .
But I agree that choosing NOT to prosecute him for child support and raising child on ur OWN can be a CHOICE . It MOST definetely can . But currently in PR only TWO women can AFFORD to make that choice . They r ..........VARSHA and MANJU . Coz both have good , steady jobs . Vaishali and Archana r not in any position to show ANY self respect . Archana was feeding Vaishali with MANAV"s money .........Money that he was not CONTRIBUTING TOWARDS HIS OLD PARENTS . But YES , VARSHA can lend Vaishu a true helping hand if BHAVNA objects to Satish taking on Vaishus financial burden .........as she HERSELF EARNS .
Right from HIRING a lawyer , fighting the case , meanwhile providing for her personal expenses is gonna be ONE BIG FINANCIAL STRUGGLE . It ALL boils down to FINANCES , FINANCES and FINANCES only in the end . I repeat ........SELF RESPECT , SOUL , HEAD HELD HIGH are LUXURIES afforded on a FULL STOMACH .
I sound MERCENARY , PETTY and MATERIALISTIC ? Thats the LIFE I saw from close quarters .So Be it then . I AM THAT if u feel so .
Look at it from the BABY's angle . The baby will grow up one day . If he finds out that HIS dad was a millionaire and cud have given him a bETTER LIFE and his mom egoistically refused financial help and didnt even BOTHER asking the Dad if he wud provide , he may get WILD with anger . He wud ask perhaps , Why did u screw MY FUTURE for ur ideas of SELF RESPECT ?Why did u bring me up on a meagre salaried income when he cud have afforded the best school , engineering or doctor admissions and university educations etc ? Who ARE u to take decisions on MY BEHALF ?
What will Vaishali say then ?
Its BEST to be calm and do WHATS BEST for the BABY if Vaishali intends to keep it .
TODAY Manav suggested ....OH WE MUST FIND A VAKIL . Oh really , it finally STRUCK u ? So long what SAHARA were u giving , SLEEPING AND EATING ? SO MUCH TIME u wasted , if That Dharmesh's Mom hadnt bothered to find answers even TODAY Dharmu wud be roaming around UNDETECTED .
And it is THIS Future that faces Vaishali . If my thoughts sound MERCENARY , Im so sorry but LIFE is HARD , lets not be Naive and idealistic . Before talking of SELF RELIANCe lets calculate how long that process will take as Baby is half way already in tummy , and Before talking of self respect lets see if we can EVEN AFFORD it anymore .
As far as Denying Dharmesh visitation rights is concerned ..............Vaishali has NO CHOICE in that matter .If he chooses to go to court and claim visitation rights , opting to provide for baby , Court will ONLY think from BABY"S INTEREST , not care a damn for Vaishali's PERSONAL feelings of HATE for the man .Courts r IMPERSONALLY OBJECTIVE .
And Dharmesh might do it . Currently , LIKE IT OR NOT , Dharmesh can PROVIDE for the baby , Vaishali CANNOT . A fact to be considered .
The Stupid CVS r suddenly turning POOR Street Level SHIBU into a hidden PRINCE from a good family .He is spotted mysteriously in good clothes by AJIT . He will give Manav capital and MARRY Vaishu is the answer to Vaishu's SELF RELIANCE AND SELF RESPECT and hence I was MUM on that issue . Coz The remedies of this serial r as REGRESSIVE and MIRACULOUS as THIS ONLY .
Oh yeah . Sulo has let Archu off MILDLY with a pat on her cheek instead of a slap , saying U have become SO BADI SO BADI that U don't need MOMMY , ha ? To which Archu replied I did it coz u shudn't DIE . Let Vaishu DIE na instead was the unspoken NONSENSE .
Ajit has STARTED sLIPPING .Im SAD . Vandu doesnt desrve this .The answer to this is Packing Rasika off to Manju , not GAMBLING .In Manavs case He cannot do it coz Vandu doesnt earn .But Manju has a second flat where she cud keep her mom and she Earns too . CVS note this and HALT this track .
Kools signing off , requesting to take NO OFFENCE .