When we got married,we hardly knew each other well,let alone love.I joined in Sanjeevani as a senior doctor,when Armaan was the disciplinarian these,and I must admit,I loved working with him,I do now too. Who wouldn't like Armaan Mallik?Funny,Caring,Handsome,and a GORGEOUS dimpled smile and to put a cherry on the cake,Responsible too! We were fast friends,and he even nicknamed me- 'Basket',because I had defeated him in a basketball match one day.Now,even that name is lost somewhere,forgotten or ignored,I don't know.
Its not that love never happened,and that we were forced to marry.Armaan and I married at our will,but the initiative was taken by our fathers,who,we discovered,were childhood best friends.Our families liked us as each others' life partners,but its sure,that neither me nor he expected us to end up in a situation like this.
I remember our Suhagraat,what horrible jokes we cracked! He had stuck out his hand and said,"Come on,lets be friends.Besst friends.Yeh shaadi-waadi business is too complicated! First lets get to know each other,Okay?"
As a husband,he is the gem of a person,and as a friend,he is the best buddy anybody can ever have.We laughed together,enjoyed,went out to dinners(mind you,NOT dates),shopping,discussed about work and even our hobbies! Our honeymoon,was spent in sight-seeing,crazy water-rides,the awesome and mesmerising cruise,and shopping.Singapore was gorgeous.We used to do all that.
But,all this time,he maintained his distance,as per his promise.We haven't even touched each other,yes..we did dance together,but not like that. I wonder often if he loves me.He doesn't come near to me,always the 'goody-goody friend'.I even ask myself a lot of times why he even agreed to marry me.I don't know the reason for him to say yes..but I had a reason.Partly,because I didn't want to put down Papa and Partly,because...I just don't know.My heart said yes,and I felt happy that I did say yes.Now I know why actually..I fell in love with Armaan.It was very soon,so I just didn't understand at that time. Yes,I love Armaan.From the core of my heart and soul,I do.Afterall,Which girl has escaped Armaan Mallik 's charms?
I want to look into his gray-blue eyes and tell him that I love him. But hello? I have no courage! I get lost the moment I look into his eyes.They're Gorgeous,you see?And can I forget the eyelocks we shared?Like the day I was cleaning the shelves,and I was about to fall..when,of course,he caught me in his arms,and I was lost.Both of us said nothing for a moment,then he tore away his gaze and cleared his throat saying,"Hey,you alright?" I love the way he cares for me..Like I am a lost child,and he..My knight in shining armour.
"Riddhima beti?",Ramukaka's voice interjected my thoughts,"Armaan baba ka phone hai."
I went down the stairs to the phone and held it to my ear
"Armaan?Why did you call on landline?You could've called on my mobile na?"
"Um..I did.Its switched off..So.."
"Really?",I tried to remember,"Okay,then,ya..what were you saying?"
"I just called to say that I'll be late today.Very late,infact.There's this important surgery that's come up,so..don't wait up for me,okay?Have dinner on time and go to sleep."
"You'll not eat?"
"I'll go have something from the canteen.Don't worry about me.Bye!"
Before I could manage out a response,the call at the other end went dead.I kept the phone down and sighed.Armaan had distanced himself more from me now.He barely came in front of me,and talk to me.Its since that night..
It was our party for Armaan being chosen as "Best doctor of the year" in Sanjeevani,and our house was filled with guests.My friends,and his friends had all come to see the "Wedded couple" and to congratulate Armaan,of course. I was enjoying,hosting and was happy partying..Till I saw something.
A girl in a short mini dress was constantly flirting with Armaan.Although he was joking off (Completely used to with female attention,you see) ,she continued to do so,brushing her hand with his purposely in intervals.He pretented or rather,seemed that he didn't notice,but he didn't even leave her company or excused himself.I looked at myself. I had worn a dark-blue halter-dress and even Armaan had complimented I looked "nice". He was like,anyday,perfect. He looked irrestible in a tuxedo and his best dimpled million dollar smile. But,in no way,I didn't know (then) why,I couldn't tolerate this scene.
I had a drink in my hand,and I went on gulping down shots till I was completely drunk.I constantly glared at the girl,cursing slangs in my breath,I could even murder her.
When I decided I was too drunk to handle the party ,I excused myself and went upstairs,holding the stair-handle tightly,because nothing was stationary in my sight. After some time,probably when everybody had left,Armaan came to the bedroom.
"Riddhima,why did you come upstairs so abruptly? Are you okay?I -"
He cut off his own sentence,seeing me wobble halfway to him,and despite his efforts,I landed in his arms,as he had to catch me.
"You're drunk!",he half-demanded,half-scolded,putting me on the armchair.
"Hindi film ka ghisa pita dialogue.",I rolled my eyes and then stared at him right in the eye,frowning,"SO?"
"What do you mean,'So' ?"
"You don't care anyway!You go flirt with that mini dress-wali! You were enjoying with her!Weren't you,mister?Hmph."
"Riddhima-"
"WAIT!",I hold him loudly,holding one hand up,"Let ME say. Why don't you notice ME,huh?You only notice the other girls?Why?Tell me."
I stood up and walked towards him,and he moved back,answering,"I do notice you.You look nice..I-"
"NICE?",I echoed as I pined him to the wall,"and that girl was what?Hot,huh?"
"I..",he hesistated,seeing how close I was,"don't understand..why you're getting..Hy-hyper.."
"You DO know,you dumbo.Tell me na!How do I look?",I stomped my feet and demanded.
He went past me,but I stood against the wall and held his hand.He turned,coming back to me.
"Its late,Riddhima.You should sleep."
"Don't go.",I whispered,feeling his breath.
He came nearer to me,or rather,I pulled him closer.In the heat of the moment,even he seemed to forget everything as she slowly,gently stroked my cheek. I closed my eyes,feeling his touch.
"You're beautiful.The most beautiful girl in the world.",It was the first time he'd said that,and I opened my eyes.
"Armaan..",I replied dazedly,"kiss me..please.."
"No.",he said,simply,with little breath intakes I could hear,"I won't do anything that we might regret later."
He tried to leave,but my grip held him to me as I said,"Please..",whispering,"I won't regret this..I know.I just..know."
He didn't wait for a second request.I closed my eyes and slipped my hands round his neck as he put his lips on mine,kissing me gently but lovingly,I was intoxicated by the effect he had on me.His lips were soft on mine,but he kept pulling me closer,his hands on my waist.
I don't remember anything after that.And nothing else even happened after that.Armaan looks at me still guiltily as if he's committed this HUGE crime of kissing his wife,and he goes on telling me Sorry,but didn't ask me even once is I feel guilty that I kissed him back or angry that he kissed me.Because I'd say,"No,I don't.That's the best ever thing that ever happened to me.Because,I am in love with you..I Love you,Armaan."
I swear,I would say that.That night,that kiss,was undoubtedly,the best thing that has EVER happened in my life.I can't forget the warmth of his arms around me,and I so miss him.I miss his laughter,his poor jokes,his teasing,Him.The real Armaan I fell in love with is lost somewhere.Just because of one kiss?Why? Does he love somebody else,thats why?And that kiss was just a moment of losing control for him?Did it even mean something to him?I need answers.And I will get them today.Because Tomorrow is our first wedding anniversary and I want to hold his hand,rightly beloning to him,only him.That is,if he loves me.
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I can hear his footsteps as he enters the room.I looked up to see him opening the bedroom door,his jacket on his hand.
"Welcome back.",I said,smiling up at him and keeping the book aside that I was reading.
He smiled slightly,"You're still up?", he looked a little taken aback.
"Uh-huh.Wasn't sleepy,so I was reading a book. And..I had to talk to you."
"You could've done it tomorrow also na?"
"No..Its..kind of urgent..important."
"That important?",he said,looking up at the clock which said 11p.m.
"Yes.",I said,firmly.
He ran a hand through his hair as he walked about the room to get his clothes,"Yes,go on.I'm listening."
I could see that he had turned his back on me,was constantly avoiding eye contact too.
Still,I took a deep breath,"Armaan,do you regret what happened that night?I mean..the kiss?"
He stopped whatever he was doing and without turning,"Riddhima,I hurt you that day.I broke our promise that we'd stay friends..So..Ofcourse I do.And I'm sorry."
He said it without any emotion in his voice,that I wanted to cry.My voice cracked as I asked,"Why?"
"Why?",he repeated,"Why not Riddhima?I know you never wanted that to happen.You were just drunk,and I..Lost control.I'm sorry.I know that you love someone else and married me just because Dr.Shashank's happiness."
I stood up,tears blocking my eyes as I made him turn,"Who told you that?And who is this 'someone else' I supposedly love?"
"I don't remember..Anjali told me that you broke up with him or something because of a big fight,and that's why you left Delhi and came here,and Dr.Shashank wanted you to marry me,because he thought I'd keep you happy..",he didn't look into my eyes,kept avoiding my gaze,as if he was hiding something.
I knew who Armaan was talking about.Sid. Siddhant Modi.And I broke up with him because I realised that he was just an habit,and I didn't love him. I didn't even think Di would think that I still love him.Just because I refused to talk about him and married Armaan?Wow.
I shook Armaan,tears flowing down my cheeks as I answered,"I don't love anybody else! And Sid - he was nothing more than a friend to me.And whatever Di told you..You believed her?Didn't even ask me?"
"Riddhima,I-"
"No.",I told him,"You Listen.I will say today.Armaan Mallik,YOU are my first and last love.",he looked up,his eyes moist and shocked,"Yes..I Love You.I know that you don't love me,but I do.I Love you more than anything else in this whole wide world,and that kiss..It was the best thing that ever happened to me.I don't want to lose you..I..",I sank down,releasing him,unable to speak any more. My heart pained but it felt light.
He sat down with me,and without hesitating,for the first time,he cupped my face and brushed away my tears.
"You love ME?"
I nodded."Then why didn't you tell me?"
"Because you idiot,duffer,stupid,dumbo..you kept going away from me,avoiding me..and I only felt you love somebody."
His face fell,"Yes,I do love somebody.That's true."
CAN'T YOU LIE? I wanted to shout.It was hurting me so much,still,I asked,
"Who?"
"You."
I couldn't realise what he said at first,and was beginning to sob again,but when it striked me that he meant me,HE LOVES ME,I hugged him tight and cried.
"I Love You Ridhima.I have Loved you from the moment I saw you and I was So thrilled when Dad told me that you'd agreed to marry me.But after the marriage when Anjali told me...",he trailed off,and I stopped crying to look at him,"I was heartbroken.But I wanted to keep you happy and see you smiling,you look so beautiful when you smile..Just like an angel."
My heart swelling with happiness,I could hardly believe any of this happening.He slowly kissed away my tears,holding me protectively,then parted and kissed me,hungrily and I kissed him back,making it known to him how much I wanted him.
I couldn't help but notice the undeniable passion we shared that day.Our love,blossoming like a flower,burst into endless fire of desire and we were one.I hadn't realised that my best day in my life was yet to come.
I felt him nuzzling my neck softly and I turned to see his dimpled smile adorning his perfect face.We were entangled in sheets,wrapped in each others arms and love.
"I Love you..More than you know.."
"I Love You too",I said,"More than I'll ever let you know."
He grinned and kissed my forehead,"Oyye Hoyye..",I blushed and he continued,"Hey,Happy Anniversary Basket."
"Happy Perfect Anniversary,Armaan.",I corrected him.
He smiled,"Yes,it is Our Perfect Anniversary.."
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"The best feeling in the world..is to love,and to be loved back."
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Please comment and do answer my questions guys,I know this OS was boring!
wow that was a sweet part!
Hey Spriha,
