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Preet Se Bandhi Yeh Dori... Ram Milaayi Jodi
Preet Se Bandhi Yeh Dori... Ram Milaayi Jodi

mona is childish (Page 3)

April2007 IF-Dazzler
April2007
April2007

Joined: 12 June 2007
Posts: 2639

Posted: 28 January 2011 at 5:58am | IP Logged
Originally posted by nirubharya

I have two responses:
One to the person who made the original post: I totally agree with you. whether it is Gujarati, Punjabi or any other regional family, there would be some expectations from a new daughter-in-law. All Indian family are generally patriachial so daughter-in-laws who are going to be a stay at home lady, are expected to take care or household chores such as cooking. To expect Mona to cook all Gujarati food was over the top but  all Indian cooking has some common tasks. Mona does not even know the basic tasks such as cutting vegetables. 
In my opinion both boys and girls should learn how to do at least basic household tasks and basic cooking. that way if you have to stay by yourself for a job situation or studies you will not starve. 

Two to April 007: This is a TV Show. do not make a generellization based on what is being shown. I know many Gujarati families and even in a joint family the situations are not what is being shown. My friend's son got married (a love marriage) and his wife does not know how to cook. the daughter -in-law works a full time job and the mother -in-law cooks in the house. Whenever, the daughter-in-law has time she helps her mother-in-law. In other family daughter is married to a guy who is not only from different country but also from a different religion. Both are full time working professionals. the husband loves to cook, so they share the cooking responsibilities.
So when you look at real families, you will realize how silly your impression is. 

I really wish Mona would request with humility to Anukalp's mother to teach her every thing. I think that lady will do it. She is a stern and rigid but has a heart of gold.
 
 
I agree, I should have made clear that I am only commenting on Gujju family in the show.
 
Mona's mom-in-law comes across as very bitter, it seems that life has placed a great burden on her shoulder and she sinking under the weight. She has to lighten up. I wouldn't want Mona to become bitter like her..Mona should retain her innocense and happy outlook, way more important than being  something, which you are not..way better to stay the way you are not lose your own self to such an extent that you don't know who you are..
 
P.S. In real life the Gujjus I know are very clannish and close,  they are not friendly with non-Gujjus. it that way this family fits the bill. There is Gujju women's group in US, they refused to  accept non-Gujjus, whereas all the other Indian women groups are open to all Indians.


Edited by April2007 - 28 January 2011 at 6:01am

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Infofan

sandyvrits Senior Member
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Joined: 06 August 2007
Posts: 762

Posted: 28 January 2011 at 10:56am | IP Logged
I read all the views and agree with all...my 2 cents-  i think Mona has been shown to be unrealistically immature which Delhi girls her age are not. She's old enough to understand what is expected  from a DIL after marriage...she can at least try..as someone said; by asking her MIL with some humility to teach her.
I LOVE  AMBAJI...if Mona makes her happy Ambaji will support her and that'd be enough for MONALP...

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Infofan

_notinuse_ IF-Dazzler
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Posts: 3080

Posted: 28 January 2011 at 11:28pm | IP Logged
    Mona's MIL should adapt the role of a teacher. If they rid of abuse, learning can take place. First and foremost, she must only pass on constructive cristism and make it a fun enviroment. Once Mona feels like she's not being attacked left and right, she will let down her guards and be confident to perform different tasks. Even if Mona is lacking in skills, you have to work with what you have and start with the basic.


Edited by PandorasBox - 28 January 2011 at 11:28pm
_notinuse_ IF-Dazzler
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Posted: 28 January 2011 at 11:34pm | IP Logged
Ohh and regarding the way Goldie's family would treat her. Yes they might be appauled that their DIL doesn't have those skills. However I think they would consider Mona as one of them. Her cousin Sweetie will try to help her out. Anukalp's family sees Mona as an outsider and will jump at every shortcoming of hers without trying to make it better. To them Mona has to prove herself to be worthy.
methebest Senior Member
methebest
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Joined: 12 October 2006
Posts: 535

Posted: 28 January 2011 at 11:39pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by April2007

Originally posted by nirubharya

I have two responses:
One to the person who made the original post: I totally agree with you. whether it is Gujarati, Punjabi or any other regional family, there would be some expectations from a new daughter-in-law. All Indian family are generally patriachial so daughter-in-laws who are going to be a stay at home lady, are expected to take care or household chores such as cooking. To expect Mona to cook all Gujarati food was over the top but  all Indian cooking has some common tasks. Mona does not even know the basic tasks such as cutting vegetables. 
In my opinion both boys and girls should learn how to do at least basic household tasks and basic cooking. that way if you have to stay by yourself for a job situation or studies you will not starve. 

Two to April 007: This is a TV Show. do not make a generellization based on what is being shown. I know many Gujarati families and even in a joint family the situations are not what is being shown. My friend's son got married (a love marriage) and his wife does not know how to cook. the daughter -in-law works a full time job and the mother -in-law cooks in the house. Whenever, the daughter-in-law has time she helps her mother-in-law. In other family daughter is married to a guy who is not only from different country but also from a different religion. Both are full time working professionals. the husband loves to cook, so they share the cooking responsibilities.
So when you look at real families, you will realize how silly your impression is. 

I really wish Mona would request with humility to Anukalp's mother to teach her every thing. I think that lady will do it. She is a stern and rigid but has a heart of gold.
 
 
I agree, I should have made clear that I am only commenting on Gujju family in the show.
 
Mona's mom-in-law comes across as very bitter, it seems that life has placed a great burden on her shoulder and she sinking under the weight. She has to lighten up. I wouldn't want Mona to become bitter like her..Mona should retain her innocense and happy outlook, way more important than being  something, which you are not..way better to stay the way you are not lose your own self to such an extent that you don't know who you are..
 
P.S. In real life the Gujjus I know are very clannish and close,  they are not friendly with non-Gujjus. it that way this family fits the bill. There is Gujju women's group in US, they refused to  accept non-Gujjus, whereas all the other Indian women groups are open to all Indians.
I am very surprised to know Gujju women group doesn't allow any non Gujju women!!!!
Because what I know is Gujjus are friendly, but they are kind of shy to mingle with other groups and they really don't have any need to mingle with anybody else since there are so many of them in the US. Also, it not legal in US to reject a person on such bases. They have to accept a non Indian man also if anybody desires to be part of it. I hightly doubt such things. I know tons of Gujjus and they are great!! I don't agree with what you said at all.
abhilasha_dream IF-Rockerz
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Posted: 29 January 2011 at 10:45am | IP Logged
I agree, cooking part is still acceptable as few parents don't teach their children, but leaving in the middle of the night without informing was childish...
 
Even in the Monday Prescap its shown that she forgets to get the Puja items was a bit too the xtreme, A person who is so Childish and Irresponsible can only get scoldings from her in-laws as this kind of ACTS is unbearable even in our parents homes, forget about in-laws...   
nycsweetie IF-Sizzlerz
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Posted: 29 January 2011 at 11:06am | IP Logged
Originally posted by kurikaur

I like watching this show bc it can be similar to real life and all of the people emotions and dislikes are understandable.  but now during the show i really find  lots of faults with Mona.  i dont understand is it that hard to wake up and be ready by 8am.  Come one, the first day i can understand but the next day?  Also with the cooking, i blame the mother.  Why hasnt the mother taught her how to cook?  Mona did not even know how to cut a vegetable which is pathetic.  Also if u think about it, if mona had married Goldie and his parents asked her to cook something, what would have happened.  Goldie parents would have treated her worse than Anukalp's family.  I really like Anukalp's mom because she really wants Mona to try and prove the family wrong, that she can be a good wife, but Mona always messes up.  I can understand Anukalp's mom's situation.  Also leaving in the middle of the night, cant she even wake her husband up and tell him that im going.  Now that is immature.  Also calling ur mother in law auntie various times, hwo hard is it to remember u are married now?? a person cant be that naive.  
Mona's mom blames Anukalp's family when she shoudl blame herself for not teaching her daughter anything.  
I am punjabi and currently a medical student.  Even with my busy schedule my mother has taught be how to cook and take care of the house because these are important skills that one should know.  I get a little annoyed when i see people like Mona.  
sorry if i said anything wrong, i dont mean to offend anyone, just stating my opinions.  thanks


well said
pari812000 Newbie
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Joined: 12 August 2010
Posts: 39

Posted: 31 January 2011 at 2:35pm | IP Logged

I may self like mona's roll in this show. I would support to her toooooo...........

However guys.... I just do not understand one thing. Why is every one hates Anukalps family.... Has any one thought of the abusing Monda would have gotten from Goldie's family including Goldie for getting marrried to him. Goldie only wanted to get married to Mona because mona was giving  more attention to non Punjabi Boy, not because he loved her or anything.... After knowing Sweety's condition in that family... no one cares for Sweety..... Imagin Mona with Goldies parents, when they were engaged, Goldie's mum already started her plans on herrasing Mona.  In comparrison Anukalp's mum is not planning stuff. She just wnat Mona to be responsible as a human. Ask a question to your self Ladies...... HAS YOUR OWN MOTHER-IN-LAW ever treated as their own daughter...... not being offensive. just being practical. For any mother -in- law she wants to make sure that the generation after her is lookedafter properly. Do you think when Karan gets married Vimmy would not expect anything out of her daughter-in-law?

It is not about Gujarti or Punjabi... It is about being irresponsible. The way they have created Mona's character, she would not have been treated any better then what she is been treated now. The posetive thought here that we are going to see Mona and Anulkap deep in love and mona growing out with her Mother-in-law as a very smart, responsible and caring person. Not like she grew with her mother.
 
In fact Mona's family should stop interfiering in her married life and concentrate on Sweet's Life. Mona is more safe with Anukalp the Sweety with Parmeet right now.

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