Rang Badalti Odhani


Rang Badalti Odhani
Rang Badalti Odhani

SS: Forging UPDATED Part IV-Page 9 (Page 4)

rafia 24 IF-Dazzler
rafia 24
rafia 24

Joined: 28 July 2005
Posts: 2661

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 5:52pm | IP Logged
o yumna not impressed im afraid it was not good, in fact it was really good. honestly thought it was really natural and haha u used shaans dialogue on khanak
'Shantanu aap ne pehle nahi bataya aap mein ye talent bhi hai?'
'Talent?Kaun sa talent?'
'Rang badalne ka! Aap bilkul safaid ho gaye ho!'
i loved their convo when he shared his concern and khanak being khank didnt get upset but understood where he came from and made him realise those fears and be overcome, loved the sentence
She was the calm in his storms. She was the voice of rationality in his head. She was the love of his life and now she was going to be the mother of his child. Their child!
and you may not have been around pregnant ladies but i loveddddddddd the coal scene honestly made me laugh and the emotional khanak reminded me of my sister when she was pregnant.
honestly great update and now im going to start pestering u for updates xx

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adventure_gurl IF-Sizzlerz

Joined: 05 October 2005
Posts: 24302

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 6:00pm | IP Logged
awesome  update that was so cute!

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saaaz IF-Dazzler

Joined: 30 November 2010
Posts: 4210

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 6:26pm | IP Logged

How Cute was this?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my gosh....really loved it......Your Lines and dialogues are Fabulous and Fantastic!!!! Really!

as for koyla....haila...never heard of that before...you sure your mom said koyla and not Cocola.....LOL

I loved it and am waiting for khusboo and khanak to go shopping together and probably Khanak to get out to do something to get rid of boredom

I almost thought you were sending her to dhulwaadi and we would get a restless shaan following her....Haaye!!!! very cute....how the whole family wants her to be with them

aww wanted to hug your khandelwals and shanak....

Edited by saaaz - 26 January 2011 at 6:37pm

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aditee IF-Rockerz

Joined: 31 May 2006
Posts: 7594

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 6:33pm | IP Logged

Awesome, awesome, awesome

Really good!
I see that you choose your words very carefully.......... both for Shaan and Khanak!
I absolutely loved Khanak's reasoning in response to Shaan's uncertainty
It was splendid.
But so true though........... many times in life we are quite unprepared to deal with what comes our way, most events/occurances arent age appropriate! Wish it were though........... 
So true! Sys!
I love the fact you use "q"s for all the Urdu words
I love Urdu, and do my best to speak it well also
I apologize if I got it wrong, but are you based in Pakistan?
Many of my Muslim friends in Delhi speak Hindi the way you write.........
It was a trip down memory lane for me.......... thank you for that!
Speaking languages correctly is my fetish
I am glad to see its yours as well
Great job!
Cant wait for the next part............

Edited by aditee - 26 January 2011 at 6:35pm

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sampar Senior Member

Joined: 04 August 2005
Posts: 426

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 8:59pm | IP Logged
yumna dear ur superb .....loved this part....wow......love ur writing style yaar.....aww man shanak are soo adorable......talent wala dialogue damn cute ..........loved how they shared their concerns with each other......

koyla wala incident is real....u must be joking LOLLOL pehle baar suna hai .....craving scene was damn cute yaar LOLLOL

keep it up....u rock girl  with words.....superb.....waiting for next part



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angel_9 Goldie

Joined: 12 November 2010
Posts: 1476

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 9:01pm | IP Logged
Hi Yumna..............
awesome update.........ClapClapClap
loved it 
khanak being pampered.................... shaan telling his feelings to khanak.................
line said by shaan.......i also want to feel the baby.............loved it
gr8 lines used for both khanak n shaan.............. StarStar
pls update next part soon...............
n thanks 4 the PM

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-YasharanArshi- IF-Rockerz

Joined: 26 December 2010
Posts: 6644

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 9:31pm | IP Logged
OMG .. How did i miss this SS .. I read both parts today !!!!!
Yumna .. Kya topic cheda hain ... Kids (Shanak) dealing with Baby !!!
Loved it a lot... Especially Shaan's reactions & actions !!!!!  Khanak has always been mature enuf to handle Shaan... hasnt she ???
Update next part sooon !!!

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priya_cool_123 IF-Rockerz

Joined: 01 October 2010
Posts: 7621

Posted: 26 January 2011 at 9:40pm | IP Logged
hey yumna... loved both the parts... love u for exploring this phase of shanak s life.....
part 2 esp... it was the cutest thing i ve ever read....

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