Bhagonwali - Baante Apni Taqdeer

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Bhagonwali - Baante Apni Taqdeer
Bhagonwali - Baante Apni Taqdeer

I have a question for this forum...

gardes IF-Dazzler
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Joined: 12 November 2009
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Posted: 23 January 2011 at 7:51pm | IP Logged
I admit, I have not watched this show from the start but have watched enough episodes and I am appalled at what they are showing in this serial.
 
Runjhun seems to be an orphan and the only people who love her unconditionally are her grandmother and her fiance.  She is constantly harassed by the neighborhood goons, and the 3 witches who are her Maamis.  The Maamas are in league with their wicked wives as well .  This girl is constantly tortured and you would expect the Maamas to come to the rescue of their niece.  But that does not seem to be the case.
 
This is all that the show is about?  Are we this desperate to watch shows that depict constant abuse of a defenseless person, a young woman who is manipulated by all, even up to a point by her Naani?  The young woman has no recourse but to silently shed tears.  This is a person who has no one to call her own and suffer mistreatment from all.  Her own Maama/Maami are shown to go as far as burning the poor girl for their own benefit and pretend to get her help and let her suffer the burns?
 
It broke my heart watching Runjhun shedding  tears and no one to ask her why and hold her close.  What if this were to be one of own children?  Our daughter?  Is Zee acting responsible in allowing such shows to be broadcast day in and day out?
 
This show replaced another show that went off air.  It only showed the MIL torturing the DIL day after day, using the vilest of means and the foulest of language.  There was no substance to the show.
 
As women watching these shows do we have a responsibility to protest such shows?
 
Your comments?

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mystifyrebee5Infofan

Wafah IF-Dazzler
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Posted: 23 January 2011 at 9:34pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by gardes

 
Runjhun seems to be an orphan and the only people who love her unconditionally are her grandmother and her fiance.  She is constantly harassed by the neighborhood goons, and the 3 witches who are her Maamis.  The Maamas are in league with their wicked wives as well .  This girl is constantly tortured and you would expect the Maamas to come to the rescue of their niece.  But that does not seem to be the case.
This is all that the show is about?  Are we this desperate to watch shows that depict constant abuse of a defenseless person, a young woman who is manipulated by all, even up to a point by her Naani?  The young woman has no recourse but to silently shed tears.  This is a person who has no one to call her own and suffer mistreatment from all.  Her own Maama/Maami are shown to go as far as burning the poor girl for their own benefit and pretend to get her help and let her suffer the burns?
 It broke my heart watching Runjhun shedding  tears and no one to ask her why and hold her close.  What if this were to be one of own children?  Our daughter?  Is Zee acting responsible in allowing such shows to be broadcast day in and day out?
 
This show replaced another show that went off air.  It only showed the MIL torturing the DIL day after day, using the vilest of means and the foulest of language.  There was no substance to the show.
 
As women watching these shows do we have a responsibility to protest such shows?
 
Your comments?


To begin with if we actually protest the show, what are we actually protesting to? Are we protesting that how can the show depict the torture of one person at the hands of another, some especially their relatives?
This is not the first show that has depicted an orphan girl being pushed to her limits or silently accepting her fate at the hands of her relatives. Heck Disney has Cinderella.  I agree that the dramatization of it all leaves you appalled that such a thing can occur, but even if you take the dramatization it has been done before, and honestly I've seen it happen in real life. Not in exact proportions but similar (some not so bad, and some worse than what's depicted).
Watching this show I know many people have complaints that Runjhun's character is such a doormat, or annoying that she doesn't speak up or fight against the atrocities committed against her. Others complain that how can the "supposed future hero" be so negative and insult the heroine, and then later be accepted as the hero.
Honestly when watching something fictional we either identify with the character or we don't. You either like the show or you don't. It depends with what you identify with and the reason you watch it. To some it might be desperation, to some the reason is the same as to why we watch any kind of generic disney movie or love story. The whole damsel in distress and the knight in shining armor while trite and overused is still appealing to some, and for some that concept applies here.
I honestly watch it for the characterizations of the actors and the interactions. I would be lying if I said I didn't have some romantic notions tied into the show, but I honestly don't take it too seriously. It's much more stressful than watching dramas that depict real life and show atrocities that happen much worse than these. I'm not condoning what happens as being okay, it is never okay to abuse anyone be it man or woman, and in real life I'd like to think that I'd stand up against it. So while Runjhun doesn't really a strong role model for women, I don't think the show depicts anything harmful.


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tehzeeb25 IF-Rockerz
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Posted: 23 January 2011 at 10:57pm | IP Logged
i agree wid wafah ..
Wat ever i wanted to explain she wrote it
To b frank its just a fictious show some like it some dont .....

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shanak.hotgardes

gardes IF-Dazzler
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Posts: 4399

Posted: 24 January 2011 at 6:32am | IP Logged
Originally posted by Wafah

Originally posted by gardes

 
Runjhun seems to be an orphan and the only people who love her unconditionally are her grandmother and her fiance.  She is constantly harassed by the neighborhood goons, and the 3 witches who are her Maamis.  The Maamas are in league with their wicked wives as well .  This girl is constantly tortured and you would expect the Maamas to come to the rescue of their niece.  But that does not seem to be the case.
This is all that the show is about?  Are we this desperate to watch shows that depict constant abuse of a defenseless person, a young woman who is manipulated by all, even up to a point by her Naani?  The young woman has no recourse but to silently shed tears.  This is a person who has no one to call her own and suffer mistreatment from all.  Her own Maama/Maami are shown to go as far as burning the poor girl for their own benefit and pretend to get her help and let her suffer the burns?
 It broke my heart watching Runjhun shedding  tears and no one to ask her why and hold her close.  What if this were to be one of own children?  Our daughter?  Is Zee acting responsible in allowing such shows to be broadcast day in and day out?
 
This show replaced another show that went off air.  It only showed the MIL torturing the DIL day after day, using the vilest of means and the foulest of language.  There was no substance to the show.
 
As women watching these shows do we have a responsibility to protest such shows?
 
Your comments?


To begin with if we actually protest the show, what are we actually protesting to? Are we protesting that how can the show depict the torture of one person at the hands of another, some especially their relatives? - I think that Zee time and again depicts their female lead as an "abala", someone who is so weak that people can walk all over her.  There are rare instances where the female protagonist is shown to have inner strength to fight back or has some support system in place to help her fight back.  Here the female protagonist is shown to be completely helpless and she is surrounded by people who feel they can abuse because she is shown to have no support system.  Is the message here that it is OK to do atyachaar - emotional and physical - if the person is in a "weak" and "needy" position in society, an orphan?  Everything vile done to her is acceptable?  Are orphans that detested in our culture and society?  Are they such a burden?  Their worth is to be everyone's punching bag and it is ok to use them as such?
 
At least that is the message that I am getting.  Women have moved on and this is a laughable and yet sad, sad depiction.
 
This is not the first show that has depicted an orphan girl being pushed to her limits or silently accepting her fate at the hands of her relatives. Heck Disney has Cinderella.  I agree that the dramatization of it all leaves you appalled that such a thing can occur, but even if you take the dramatization it has been done before, and honestly I've seen it happen in real life. Not in exact proportions but similar (some not so bad, and some worse than what's depicted). - Very good points, Wafah, but Cinderella was a fairy tale written in early1700's.  Women have come a long ways.  Even Orphan Annie days (I hope) are gone.....  though Orphan Annie spoke up and fought back.  Why Runjhun, who is aware of what is happening around her, is not allowed to say one word and is so accepting of her fate?  Why is she not allowed a fighting spirit to fight her adversaries?  Do people really enjoy such dramatization?
 
Watching this show I know many people have complaints that Runjhun's character is such a doormat, or annoying that she doesn't speak up or fight against the atrocities committed against her. Others complain that how can the "supposed future hero" be so negative and insult the heroine, and then later be accepted as the hero. - That is the other issue I have.....  She will be "married off" to an anti-hero who is making her life hell on earth right now.  He has not left one stone unturned in his means to abuse her and she will HAVE to accept such a b******d as her husband and keep her head held high in society?  Where is the fighting spirit in the female lead?

Honestly when watching something fictional we either identify with the character or we don't. You either like the show or you don't. It depends with what you identify with and the reason you watch it. To some it might be desperation, to some the reason is the same as to why we watch any kind of generic disney movie or love story. The whole damsel in distress and the knight in shining armor while trite and overused is still appealing to some, and for some that concept applies here. - The whole damsel in distress and her knight on a white horse is very overrated in this day and age (I fail to see it in this show) and the current dramatization is sending such a bad message.  All I see is a VICTIM!

I honestly watch it for the characterizations of the actors and the interactions. I would be lying if I said I didn't have some romantic notions tied into the show, but I honestly don't take it too seriously. It's much more stressful than watching dramas that depict real life and show atrocities that happen much worse than these. I'm not condoning what happens as being okay, it is never okay to abuse anyone be it man or woman, and in real life I'd like to think that I'd stand up against it. So while Runjhun doesn't really a strong role model for women, I don't think the show depicts anything harmful. - I am not a reality TV watching person but I do like to watch a show for strong characterizations.  I too watch (occasionally) for some of the reasons you mention.  I liked Himanshu Malhotra in Aap Ki Antara as a grey character and was sad to see him replaced then.  Rita Bhaduri was one of my favorite characters on Choti Bahu.  Both are doing a fine job as actors, but the portrayal or characterization of a woman as an "abala" (or a *itch in case of Maamis) and abuse and treatment of an orphan as a third class citizen is jarring on my sensibilities as a woman and a mother.


 
Wafah, thanks for expressing your viewpoint so well.  My response is embedded....


Edited by gardes - 24 January 2011 at 7:05am

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mystifyre

gardes IF-Dazzler
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Posted: 24 January 2011 at 6:34am | IP Logged
Originally posted by tehzeeb25

i agree wid wafah ..
Wat ever i wanted to explain she wrote it
To b frank its just a fictious show some like it some dont .....
 
Thanks for your comments, Tehzeeb.
Wafah IF-Dazzler
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Joined: 01 May 2006
Posts: 3286

Posted: 24 January 2011 at 8:49am | IP Logged
Originally posted by gardes

I think that Zee time and again depicts their female lead as an "abala", someone who is so weak that people can walk all over her.  There are rare instances where the female protagonist is shown to have inner strength to fight back or has some support system in place to help her fight back.  Here the female protagonist is shown to be completely helpless and she is surrounded by people who feel they can abuse because she is shown to have no support system.  Is the message here that it is OK to do atyachaar - emotional and physical - if the person is in a "weak" and "needy" position in society, an orphan?  Everything vile done to her is acceptable?  Are orphans that detested in our culture and society?  Are they such a burden?  Their worth is to be everyone's punching bag and it is ok to use them as such?
At least that is the message that I am getting.  Women have moved on and this is a laughable and yet sad, sad depiction.


I agree here with you that most shows show that the female lead is weak, and this isn't only the case for Zee, and not all Zee shows are like that so you can't really single zee out. I agree that we do need more female protagonists that can be shown stronger or play equal part as the men do. Honestly why the regular "saas - bahu" shows get more attention is beyond me.
As for the message in the show. I don't think the message that they show gives is that its okay for people to be tortured emotionally or physically. That's never right. I don't think orphans are detested in our society, but there are a lot of orphans out there in our society, and each orphan has a different situation. Most people know that living the orphan life isn't easy, and often these are the people that become the victims of crimes, or get into crimes themselves. People who are helpless in the society are the ones that get picked on. This is true regardless of whether they are female or male. Protesting not to show oppression on TV will not take away from the oppression that actually happens in the real world. TV shows if they show oppression also show love, that goes against oppression or the bad being given their due, which isn't always true in the real world.

It is never right to oppress anyone, kid, man or woman and people such as yourself protesting that it is not right shows that as a society we fight in terms of injustice, but that doesn't mean that there are not woman who haven't or aren't in abusive relationships. People I've known have been in a battered relationship, and continue to be in regardless of the fact to the others find it meaningless.
 
Originally posted by gardes

Very good points, Wafah, but Cinderella was a fairy tale written in early1700's.  Women have come a long ways.  Even Orphan Annie days (I hope) are gone.....  though Orphan Annie spoke up and fought back.  Why Runjhun, who is aware of what is happening around her, is not allowed to say one word and is so accepting of her fate?  Why is she not allowed a fighting spirit to fight her adversaries?  Do people really enjoy such dramatization?


I don't know why Runjhun is so accepting of her fate. Why is anyone accepting of their fate. In the world there are different kinds of people. Some people fight for their beliefs, and some people sit and tolerate all kinds of injustice accepting it as their fate. Why they do it could be any number of reasons. Like I said there are women who are aware that they are in an abusive relationship, yet some don't have to courage to step out. Some believe that it is the only way they can receive love. Stepping away from a feminist situation, in schools there are kids that are bullied, and rarely speak up. They willingly hand in their "lunch money" so to speak rather than fight the bully or stand up for themselves. In the work force you have some people who are hardworking and work all their life, but sometimes the person who rarely does anything who gets by on his charms is promoted. Some might protest but some choose to resign themselves to their fate. Different people have different personalities. Some women are perfectly content in being housewives and some strive to achieve career goals more. It doesn't make one woman weaker than the other.
 
Originally posted by gardes

That is the other issue I have.....  She will be "married off" to an anti-hero who is making her life hell on earth right now.  He has not left one stone unturned in his means to abuse her and she will HAVE to accept such a b******d as her husband and keep her head held high in society?  Where is the fighting spirit in the female lead?


LOL I'm afraid if I defend Guddu Shukla's character I will come of as condoning that what his character has done so far, which is not true. If it was me, he would have received a slap, or I'd like to think that I'm strong enough to speak up and literally kick him in the shins. Though I might give him some slack if he hated me for maligning his character. He himself knows exactly what he is, a man who doesn't care an ounce for society, because maybe the society has given him nothing in return. He doesn't believe in being emotionally swayed and entertains himself by troubling people and taking what he believes is rightfully his. So far his anger at Runjhun is somewhat justified. The area is gray, and honestly he wasn't really tortured much to hold such a strong grudge (I think it's his false pride here), but in real life if someone labels you as a "sexual predator", in the end even if the complaint is taken back, your reputation is ruined. Guddu has never manhandled or looked at a woman in the wrong way. In fact he's never really ever laid a hand on Runjhun. He's threatened her because of the money that is owed to him, but he never laid a hand on her or even looked at her wrongly before she filed a complaint against him. If it is rubbed in your face that the girl who wronged you is going to get married and that he's just full of hot air and no action then you tend to get angry. You have to stoke the flame for a fire. People say he should forgive and forget, but just because someone apologizes doesn't mean we usually forgive them. Guddu is known for his hot-headedness, and no I'm not saying he's right. But according to him he's justified. Being justified doesn't really mean it has to be right.

Originally posted by gardes

The whole damsel in distress and her knight on a white horse is very overrated in this day and age (I fail to see it in this show) and the current dramatization is sending such a bad message.  All I see is a VICTIM!
I am not a reality TV watching person but I do like to watch a show for strong characterizations.  I too watch (occasionally) for some of the reasons you mention.  I liked Himanshu Malhotra in Aap Ki Antara as a grey character and was sad to see him replaced then.  Rita Bhaduri was one of my favorite characters on Choti Bahu.  Both are doing a fine job as actors, but the portrayal or characterization of a woman as an "abala" (or a *itch in case of Maamis) and abuse and treatment of an orphan as a third class citizen is jarring on my sensibilities as a woman and a mother.




It's true that Runjhun is a victim, but a person is only a victim if he allows himself to be one. In some situations a person is helpless due to situation and is forced to be a victim. Sometimes we're victims to bad television. I think when regardless of what the aunts or uncles are portrayed as I think so far I like their characterizations (not the fact that they are evil) but they are true to their character. Including all the others so far. Most characters teeter and totter and honestly a character that changes colors to suit the show is what I find more annoying than characters that are portrayed as helpless or evil. I'm glad that mistreatment of Runjhun and Guddu's actions and the family mistreatment affects your sensibilities, I'd be more worried if it didn't. It is okay not to be okay with what is happening in the show, because it isn't right. No one should be okay with that.  Though we all like to believe that people have redeeming qualities. That people can improve and situations will get better. As Anne Frank said "Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart" so maybe we watch to eventually see the evil turn good or the enemies become friends or that eventually the orphan that suffers won't have to suffer anymore because either she will have the strength to stand up for herself, or find someone who can be strong enough to fight for her without worrying about consequences.

In one of my favourite movies, Young Victoria,  there is the scene, where Victoria is playing chess with Prince Albert, and says sometimes she feels like a pawn being played by her mother and benefactors. The prince tells her that it means that she should just get better at playing the game so she can beat them at it. She says shouldn't she just find a reliable husband who will beat them for her. He says not for her but "with" her.

So who knows maybe Runjhun will eventually get better at beating her aunts at their own game. It is too early to tell...


Edited by Wafah - 24 January 2011 at 8:51am

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