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SS Nivren: Kahani Mohabbat Ki Pt 3 Pg 5 (Page 3)

Abhiram- IF-Dazzler
Abhiram-
Abhiram-

Joined: 27 December 2010
Posts: 3878

Posted: 27 January 2011 at 1:09am | IP Logged
Liked your post verry MUCH! i would recommend that u join the CCBM CT TEAM as dialogue writer......u would excel.....
   I want to see the same in the show as written here!
   Kinha n Nivren ROCKS!

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ArHi_4everSofnadiyaloveskinny

diyaloveskinny IF-Sizzlerz
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Posts: 16682

Posted: 27 January 2011 at 1:14am | IP Logged
Originally posted by nivren

Liked your post verry MUCH! i would recommend that u join the CCBM CT TEAM as dialogue writer......u would excel.....
   I want to see the same in the show as written here!
   Kinha n Nivren ROCKS!


Very well said,  she must join in as the dialogue writer,  its so sweet and full of heart touching scenes and dialogue,  Wish this is only that happens,  but I want Nivren to remain together and never seperate

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ArHi_4everAbhiram-

Abhiram- IF-Dazzler
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Posts: 3878

Posted: 27 January 2011 at 1:22am | IP Logged
Yes but i want the same scene to happen but Nivren should not seperate(they will not seperate!) instead Nivi should try to see Viren's heart wrenching love and accept him; as if such a scene happens It will be proved beyond doub that Viren TRULY AND LOVES NIVI FROM THE BOTTOM OF HIS HEART!!
     Just wish Nivren stays eternally...................

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ArHi_4everdiyaloveskinny

diyaloveskinny IF-Sizzlerz
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 1:32am | IP Logged
Originally posted by nivren

Yes but i want the same scene to happen but Nivren should not seperate(they will not seperate!) instead Nivi should try to see Viren's heart wrenching love and accept him; as if such a scene happens It will be proved beyond doub that Viren TRULY AND LOVES NIVI FROM THE BOTTOM OF HIS HEART!!
     Just wish Nivren stays eternally...................


U r absolutely right,  I agree with u,  I want Nivren to remain eternal, and no one can seperate them.,

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ArHi_4ever

ArHi_4ever Goldie
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 2:53am | IP Logged

Part 2

 

Nivedita is standing on the terrace and crying thinking, 'Viren aisa kaise kar sakte hai? Mujhe zindagi jeena sikhane wala mujhe rula kaise sakta hai? Agar main woh nishaan na dekhti toh shayad kabhi yakeen nahi kar paati ke Viren aisa kar sakte hai. Yeh kaisi pareeksha hai, Ma? Issi din ke liye Viren ke saath khushiyan dikhayi thi aapne?' She collapses on the floor crying bitterly when Chanchal comes and sees her angrily. Nivedita notices her and stands up saying, 'Maa aap?' Chanchal says, 'Khabardaar jo mujhe maa kaha ho toh. Kya chahti ho tum, Nivedita? Mere Viren ko mujhse cheen toh liya hai ab uski jaan bhi le logi?' Nivedita is shocked to hear this and says, 'Ma! Aap aisa soch kaise sakti hai? Main Viren ko takleef kyun pohochaougi balki woh toh khud'' She stops her sentence and thinks, 'Nahi, main maa ko yeh baat kaise bata sakti houn? Mujhe khud hi kuch karna parhega.' Chanchal holds on to her sentence and says, 'Woh toh khud kya, Nivedita?' Nivedita wipes her tears and says, 'Maa, kuch toh galat ho raha hai. Main nahi janti kyun lekin main baat tak pohoch ke hi rahougi.' She turns to go but stops to says, 'Maa, agar main iss baat ki neev tak na pohoch paayi toh mera vaada hai aapse ke main iss ghar ko chod dougi aur mera parivaar woh ghar.' She walks away and Chanchal thinks, 'Nivedita yaha se jaane ke liye kasie tayar ho gayi? Aakhir yeh Viren kar kya raha hai?'

 

Nivedita is putting her clothes away as she glances over at Viren sleeping. Siddharth knocks the door and requests to come in. Nivedita comes to the door and says, 'Viren abhi so rahe hai. Jaag jayege toh aap mil lena.' Siddharth notices her curt tone and says, 'Tum toh theek ho na, Nivedita?' She does not look at him and replies, 'Mera iss ghar mein aane se lekar aaj tak kuch sahi hua hai, Siddharth, jo aaj hoga? Pehle mujhe lagta tha ke hum dono ka mail nahi hai lekin aaj aisa lagta hai ke iss ghar se mera naata kabhi nahi jud sakta.' Siddharth says, 'Yeh tum kya keh rahi ho? Tum iss ghar ki bahu ho, Putul' I am sorry, Nivedita.' Nivedita has tears in her eyes and says, 'Nahi Siddharth, main iss ghar ki kuch nahi houn. Kaun mujhe pasand karta hai? Kaun chahta hai ke ab main yaha rahoun?' Siddharth says, 'Viren chahta hai, Nivedita. Woh toh tumse kitna pyaar karta hai ke poori duniya se larh parha? Toh phir tum tension kyun le rahi ho?' Nivedita's mind goes over all the things that Viren has done since she came to the house and turns her back towards Siddharth. She says, 'Siddharth, mujhe kuch kaam hai. Baad mein baat karein?' Siddharth leaves and Nivedita remembers Viren's words, 'Meri Nivedita meri kyun nahi thi? Siddharth ki wajah se. Mera pyaar adhoora kyun tha? Siddharth ki wajah se. Meri Nivedita ke zindagi mein toofan kaise aaya? Siddharth ki wajah se.'

 

Viren gets up not feeling very well and looks over to Nivedita's bed where she is sitting up her arms around her knees. He walks up to her but she does not react. He calls out her name and she comes back to reality with a start. She looks at him and then the clock. She is shocked to see its 6 in the morning. She says, 'Par abhi toh dus baje the.' Viren says, 'Tum poori raat soyi nahi?' Nivedita replies, 'Mere sone ya jaagne se tumhara koi lena dena nahi hai, Viren.' She stands up and is about to walk but her foot gets stuck in the carpet and she is about to trip when Viren catches her. She senses his touch and closes her eyes thinking of their time at Riverdale Resort. How close they had become. She leaves his hand suddenly and says, 'Mujhe sambhaalne ki zaroorat nahi hai aur agar iraada mujhe girane ka hi hai toh uthana kyun?' She begins to go but he blocks her way and says, 'Nahi Nivedita, main aisa nahi karna chahta tha.' He tries to hold her shoulders and says, 'Nahi Viren! Mat haath lagao mujhe. Nahi bardaasht kar sakti main.' Viren says, 'Janne ki koshish toh karo ke maine yeh sab kiya kyun?' Nivedita looks at him defiantly and says, 'Kyun kiya, yeh zaroori nahi hai mere liye. Kaise kar sakte the yeh zaroori hai. Pyaar ki duhayi dene wala insaan apne pyyar ko chot pohocha kar chal gaya? Nahi Viren, koi bhi nazariye se dekho toh sahi nahi lagta.' She runs out of the room and Viren sits on the edge of the bed worried.

 

Nivedita goes out in the garden and sits on the bench when Naintara Dadi comes out and sees her crying. She walks towards her hurriedly and says, 'Nivi! Nivi beta! Yeh tu ro kyun rahi hai?' Nivi walks up to her and says, 'Nahi Dadi. Woh Viren ki tabiyat theek nahi hai na, iss liye.' Dadi says, 'Kya hua usse?' Nivedita replies, 'Woh bas kal behosh ho gaye the. Thakan lagi hai. Theek ho jayege.' Nivedita does not meet Dadi's eyes who says, 'Nivi, Dadi se jhoot bol rahi hai?' Nivedita says, 'Dadi aisi baat nahi hai. Aap hi kehti thin a ke ghar ki baat ghar mein rahe toh accha hai?' Dadi kisses her forehead andsays, 'Meri pyaari bacchii. Tu toh hamesha meri baat sunti hai.' Nivedita smiles with tears in her eyes and asks, 'Lekin Dadi, koi apna bharosa tod de toh kya karna chahiye?' Dadi wonders why Nivedita is asking such a question but does not pry and says, 'Har cheez ki wajah hoti hai, Nivi. Jab tak tujhe poori baat na pata chale, tu faisla kaise le sakti hai?' Nivedita thinks back to Viren saying the same things and hugs Dadi saying, 'Aap ke paas har cheez ka jawab hai Dadi. Thank you!.' Dadi hugs her back saying, 'Khush reh, Nivi. Tere pati par bharosa rakh.' Nivedita flinches at her words and then leaves her to go back home.



Edited by eternal_maaneet - 27 January 2011 at 2:53am

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NivRen_Luvu4evemanjusha_92MonuKaKinshuksavera2007shana_83ranragprajeesalekh1gina24sihuJasleenAnamikaSJainVirMan_ArShigmann2010Abhiram-FrozenRainanjaani07roops82Sofnasabihaa.diyaloveskinny

FrozenRain IF-Rockerz
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 3:54am | IP Logged
awsome chapter.....continue soon......very good dialogues......keep up the good work....all the best for u.....

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ArHi_4ever

gmann2010 IF-Dazzler
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Posted: 27 January 2011 at 7:01am | IP Logged
I wish it would have happned in show like your SS. Good work, please continue soon. 
Abhiram- IF-Dazzler
Abhiram-
Abhiram-

Joined: 27 December 2010
Posts: 3878

Posted: 27 January 2011 at 8:28am | IP Logged
ClapFANTASTIC EPISODE 2! ur imagination and realization on how the story will move forward is an idea  PAR EXCELLENCE!! very very beautiful dialogues and story......wannna see more such SS's
      Though for this revelation of Viren's real side to Nivi is still a long way off,
whenever this point will come i am doubly and perfectly sure that the story or the scenes would take place as u have visualized!
     BEST OF LUCK AND LOTS OF GOOD WISHES TO U!! ( HOPING TO SEE U AS A DIALOGUE WRITER IN THE FUTURE ( IN CCBM CT TEAM) !)Big smile

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