Viren's Obsessive Love for Nivedita - Page 4

Originally posted by: Anamika1570

It is not US. He studied in Delhi I guess. I can imagine how Viren would have felt because I was in Boarding School from the age of 5 and was a victim of Bad Parenting myself. I know how it feels when favoritism is shown. I know the pain when I see friends happy with their Parents and show their affection when you get none. At such a tender age one does not understand good or bad and may nurture feelings of hatred which goes a long way. I am 40 now and I forgave my Parents for what they did to me only a few years ago.  Because of my experience I was never attached to my Parents and when I had to leave them I did not feel anything. In fact when I visit my family for 2 or 3 days a year I feel suffocated and out of place. Probably that is the sort of feeling Viren too had when he had to leave his family and Sood name to marry Nivedita.

He later went to US, thats what I wanted to say!

Originally posted by: Omshanti1111

Rather, I would say that Viren had been blessed by God, that he was not raised by JW and CC directly. Rather, he was sent to an environment or residential school, where good family kids are sent.

I do not know what he suffered, he might have suffered a trauma or an injustice, which he could not forget. He could have turned him so good that Siddharth would have looked "insignificant" in front of him. But he chose to destroy Sid.

I give you an example, when a student gets poor marks in exam, he/she has two ways

1. He/she can work hard and excel and get better marks

2. Student can retort to unfair means like "cheating", "plagiarism".

 

its upto the individual and his/her values. Since Viren must be sent to a good residential school (I anticipate good school, as he is from a rich family and went to USA), he cannot blame for the degradation of his character on child Sid's actions.

 

Viren was not parented by CC and JW, and see that as a blessing!

The above can only be said with hindsight and from an outsiders view; as someone who's sibling did go to boarding school for that child it is very hard for them to understand why one has been 'sent away' while the other stays within the Family.

This brings about a sense of insecurity and for a child this is rationalized by 'disliking/hating' the one/s staying at home; whenever my Brother came home he was always mean and angry with the rest of us and wanted our Parents full attention on him alone-even if it was by causing fights with us.

In fact for a child it's about the feeling of abandonment, of being 'thrown out' of a loving environment and into one where love is absence.

For Viren this must have been hard and added to this was the fact neither Chanchal or Jawhar are what we would call loving parents; i very much doubt they called or visited Viren on a regular basis, neither from the sounds of things did he come home on weekends etc. 

No child will consciencely blame their Parents; from a young age we are brought up in the belief that our Parents love their children beyond anything and will die for them and this is the truth for 99.9% of Parents like Vandana but imagine you are the unfortunate one who's Parents is from that 0.01% like Chanchal and Jawhar that you are just an extension of them and your life only has meaning according to how it shows upon them.

Would any child be able to bear that no matter what their age? I don't think so and it's easier to blame someone who from your eyes seems to have got everything like Siddath; for Viren it would seem that Siddath got everything; Dada Dadi pyaar, a loving caring Mother, the business, expectations of him to succeed and do well, even the wedding with all the rituals and everyone taking part down to even the photos-none of which Viren got.

No one has any expectations of Viren other then to spend money and enjoy himself and only person who does have expectations on him to become more then he is is Nivi who was Siddath love- can you see how that would infuriate someone who already feels they've lost out in everything to Siddath?

Just like the question with regards to Nivi love for Viren being on the rebound it's the same with regards to Viren anger in Siddath is in fact his rebound anger on his Parents.

Viren needs someone to look deep beyond the anger that is manifesting itself in what he is doing to Nivi to get to Siddath and actually deal with the pain and hurt underneath and heal that.

This is where i believe Nivedita strength lies the ability to heal others even if they have harmed themselves and for Nivi who has truly given her heart to Viren even when knowing the truth though hurt she will still do her utmost to heal Viren. 

Originally posted by: shasha74

The above can only be said with hindsight and from an outsiders view; as someone who's sibling did go to boarding school for that child it is very hard for them to understand why one has been 'sent away' while the other stays within the Family.

This brings about a sense of insecurity and for a child this is rationalized by 'disliking/hating' the one/s staying at home; whenever my Brother came home he was always mean and angry with the rest of us and wanted our Parents full attention on him alone-even if it was by causing fights with us.

In fact for a child it's about the feeling of abandonment, of being 'thrown out' of a loving environment and into one where love is absence.

For Viren this must have been hard and added to this was the fact neither Chanchal or Jawhar are what we would call loving parents; i very much doubt they called or visited Viren on a regular basis, neither from the sounds of things did he come home on weekends etc. 

No child will consciencely blame their Parents; from a young age we are brought up in the belief that our Parents love their children beyond anything and will die for them and this is the truth for 99.9% of Parents like Vandana but imagine you are the unfortunate one who's Parents is from that 0.01% like Chanchal and Jawhar that you are just an extension of them and your life only has meaning according to how it shows upon them.

Would any child be able to bear that no matter what their age? I don't think so and it's easier to blame someone who from your eyes seems to have got everything like Siddath; for Viren it would seem that Siddath got everything; Dada Dadi pyaar, a loving caring Mother, the business, expectations of him to succeed and do well, even the wedding with all the rituals and everyone taking part down to even the photos-none of which Viren got.

No one has any expectations of Viren other then to spend money and enjoy himself and only person who does have expectations on him to become more then he is is Nivi who was Siddath love- can you see how that would infuriate someone who already feels they've lost out in everything to Siddath?

Just like the question with regards to Nivi love for Viren being on the rebound it's the same with regards to Viren anger in Siddath is in fact his rebound anger on his Parents.

Viren needs someone to look deep beyond the anger that is manifesting itself in what he is doing to Nivi to get to Siddath and actually deal with the pain and hurt underneath and heal that.

This is where i believe Nivedita strength lies the ability to heal others even if they have harmed themselves and for Nivi who has truly given her heart to Viren even when knowing the truth though hurt she will still do her utmost to heal Viren. 

I agree with you completely. I remember myself creating problems for my Brother because of the preferential treatment he received from my parents which I had been denied by sending to Boarding School. I felt abandoned and thrown out. I even felt jealous of my classmates and brother when I saw them getting what I did not get.  I even now do not understand the logic of my Parents keeping my Brother with them when I was send away. Every time someone came to visit me the school authorities had tons of complaints about me and that was the way I was getting back to my Parents. My sole aim was to hurt my Parents then whatever way I could.  I grew up as a problematic kid and hated my Parents and I would have stayed that way and ruined my own life if I did not get somebody who influenced me in a positive manner ... who told me that I am solely responsible for my destiny and I should not let my Parents treatment affect me and should try to overcome it by becoming emotionally strong and independent... So I became bold and independent and vowed that I would never treat my kids the way I was treated.

When my Brother joined Engineering College he could not survive in the Hostel for even a month and felt homesick everyday (So..My Parents found a solution to that my sending him to stay with a relative who lived in the same City). Then you can imagine what I would have felt as a child of 5 years. Till the age of 19 I was more or less in Hostels. One has to really go trough that experience to be able to relate to the situation of Viren.

Your response Anamika above has hit the nail on the head with regards to Viren, depending on that the CV's intend his character to be that of the flawed hero as  Macbeth and Othello were.

The groW*H and maturity of people is based on their experiences, environment and nature. Some children do flourish in boarding school (though I have grave doubts that any child being sent away at 5 is able to totally comprehend the concept of Family within its fullest context ie not just about the Family love but the ways Families are tied and held together, the ups and downs within the Family structure, the moral code of the Family, the absorbing of how a Family is structured and the roles played by each member)

Beneath Viren funny go lucky facade, and it is a facade as each time he has brought up something that has caused him pain what does he say afterwards " mein toh mazaart kare hu" but you know HE ISN'T!

He is a hurt little boy who is hitting out at the only one that he can blame and unfortunately it's Siddath for the rules of Society and Family do not allow him to be angry at those who really deserve it his Parents and to a lesser degree his Grandparents.

That's one of the reason we see Viren as being a lone wolf he is more comfortable by himself, the playing of the flute-a solitary instrument, being able to stand against his Family and also why he was able to come up with his horrible plan.

When you have no one but yourself to rely on, to trust on, to depend on that what your inner voice says makes sense and if that voice is fueled by pain and anger then this is the outcome of it though it makes sense only to yourself.

Until now we all thought that Viren was Nivi savior but truth be told it will/could be Nivi who in fact becomes Viren savior.

Originally posted by: shasha74

Your response Anamika above has hit the nail on the head with regards to Viren, depending on that the CV's intend his character to be that of the flawed hero as  Macbeth and Othello were.

The groW*H and maturity of people is based on their experiences, environment and nature. Some children do flourish in boarding school (though I have grave doubts that any child being sent away at 5 is able to totally comprehend the concept of Family within its fullest context ie not just about the Family love but the ways Families are tied and held together, the ups and downs within the Family structure, the moral code of the Family, the absorbing of how a Family is structured and the roles played by each member)

Beneath Viren funny go lucky facade, and it is a facade as each time he has brought up something that has caused him pain what does he say afterwards " mein toh mazaart kare hu" but you know HE ISN'T!

He is a hurt little boy who is hitting out at the only one that he can blame and unfortunately it's Siddath for the rules of Society and Family do not allow him to be angry at those who really deserve it his Parents and to a lesser degree his Grandparents.

That's one of the reason we see Viren as being a lone wolf he is more comfortable by himself, the playing of the flute-a solitary instrument, being able to stand against his Family and also why he was able to come up with his horrible plan.

When you have no one but yourself to rely on, to trust on, to depend on that what your inner voice says makes sense and if that voice is fueled by pain and anger then this is the outcome of it though it makes sense only to yourself.

Until now we all thought that Viren was Nivi savior but truth be told it will/could be Nivi who in fact becomes Viren savior.

I agree with you and I am always ready to enter a reasonable discussion with people like you and Anamika.