Posted: 19 January 2011 at 1:54am | IP Logged
Before I get to the several issues brought up in this thread here, I'd like to point to the fact that if anyone ever has any issues with the DT or how things are being handled (if there is a question about our judgement or the possible prejudice in our decisions) they are absolutely free to question us and demand an explanation. We understand that we might not always be right - though we strive to be - and if you feel that our behavior or decision was in anyway wrong, feel free to question us on it and we'll be more than happy to clarify any doubts you might have - we'll work with you for as long as it takes until you're satisfied with the explanation or the decision.
That being said, I don't think it's too much for the DT to ask that any grievances with them be addressed to them in a PM and not on a public forum. This isn't because we are in anyway incapable of addressing these issues in an open forum - it is just that it would be a lot more respectful if this discussion were carried out through PM between the concerned parties. We have always extended every member the courtesy of addressing any issues we might have with them in private through a PM. And we've maintained discretion throughout. So I'm not sure if it's too much for us to ask for the same courtesy in return. A PM about the issues troubling members here would have done the trick too. We've never ignored any PMs and we have always taken action on every PM we've got. I can say this for a fact and I'm sure members who have been helped will be able to attest to this should the need present itself. Nevertheless, if a public forum is what is preferred for such a discussion, then I guess a public forum it will be.
With respect to the need for censorship and rules in the forum, generally any and every discussion requires a bit of moderation. That doesn't mean that your freedom to speak your mind or present your thoughts is limited or your rights hindered. It just means that there is a certain expectation about the way you present those thoughts and the way you speak your mind. While you're free to present your ideas to the forum without prejudice, you are expected to take into consideration your audience as you decide on the best way (the best words, tone and details) to voice your thoughts. And is that really too much to ask?
Is it too much to ask that we be considerate of each other and our sensibilities? Is it really that tiresome to make a small effort in self-censoring our content due to the wide age group that visits our forum? We say it's not our job to worry about the kids that visit the forum, it's not our job to worry about the faint-of-heart who can't hear the harsh truth... But are we not all part of the same community - young and old, introverts and extroverts alike? We have people of different temperaments, age groups, cultures and sensibilities in our midst - and all of us together make the LTL forum what it is. So why is it considered a threat to our liberties if we are expected to be considerate of those around us? Why are we expecting everyone to adjust to our thoughts and our opinions without actually wanting to adjust to anyone else's? The kids are not welcome because they aren't our problem and those that might be hurt by our comments just need to suck it up because we won't change? Is that the forum we want..? Is that the kind of environment we find will be conducive to discussions?
And then there is the whole "issue" with wanting to discuss an actor's private life. Let me first clarify what we'd said earlier - an actor's private life that does NOT pertain to the show or its goings on should be avoided in the forum if possible. After all this is a discussion forum for the show.
I understand that an actor's private life is related to the show through the actor himself, but does it really pertain to the show to know who is currently dating who and whether or not they are lying about their relationship? How does it affect Dutta-Nakku or the characters in LTL if Mishal does or does not date Ridhi?! What difference does it make to the show? Does it really relate to the show to know what the speculated financial standing of an actor is and whether or not he/she worked hard to get where they are? And what exactly qualifies us to take those liberties with an actor's personal life? What allows us to judge their life choices - to judge whether or not they worked hard to get where they are? Unless the actors themselves come to us and tell us what they did, how they lived and who they're dating, what honestly gives us the right to speculate on their lives..?
Acting is a profession and being in the public eye is a professional hazard. But does that really mean that we use that as an excuse to strip every actor of their dignity and privacy every chance we get in the name of "They asked for it because they chose this profession!"..?! Just because they enjoy acting, they have to accept being judged on their personal choices, their life style, their "degree of friendship" with people they know and their family relationships? They allow us a glimpse into their lives through those media interviews that have been alluded too - they share with us a part of their life - and we use that as an excuse to delve in further and rip to shreds what they said and what they meant?
If two actors say they aren't together, why is it so hard for us just to take their word for it? Why is everything that comes out of an actor's mouth considered a lie until proven to be true? When and if they want to share the details of their relationship with us, they will! Can we really not extend them this much respect - to wait for them to share with us what they choose instead of posting sometimes hurtful speculations about their private lives? Do we really have to do our worst because we can? I feel like we've set the bar really low for us. We absolve ourselves of any responsibility when it comes to actors - it's like we don't believe they deserve the same right to privacy or the same courtesy of being trusted for their word and appreciated for their work alone, as any other person would.
And lastly, I'll address Parul about the issue related to the Telebirdie article in specific. We would have preferred to discuss this with you in private Parul, but unfortunately a public forum was preferred for this discussion. The Telebirdie article in question had a speculative section on Mishal/Ridhi's relationship status. And since Mishal and Ridhi have both denied being in a relationship, we felt they deserved the respect to be believed for their words. You were only asked to remove the sections related to the actor's private life i.e. the sections pertaining to the purely speculative discussion about Ridhi and her relationship with Mishal - no where in the PM were you asked to discontinue the entire Telebirdie article. However it seems now that maybe that is what you felt was implied..? If there was any disagreement with this decision, we would have been glad to address it had it been brought to our attention when we send the PM. However, at that time we heard no objection from you - not when the PM was send and not later on in the week even though you claim that you'd contacted us about the issue several times . In fact, instead of bringing to our attention any objections that you might have had with the PM, you chose to send out a mass PM to selected members on the forum letting them know about the "unfair" treatment of your post and your subsequent decision to leave the forum. But because the PM wasn't addressed to us nor was it send to us, we didn't feel it was our place to comment on it. And now, after a week of that said incident you post your grievances with the LTL DT in this public post as opposed to a private PM.
While we appreciate your freedom of speech - and believe me we do - I would like to stress that there were better ways to initiate and continue this discussion. Had you PMed us with your concerns, I am sure we'd have done our best to work with you in an attempt to help you feel more comfortable in the forum. But I guess that's all in the past. You've decided to move on from the LTL forum and we respect your decision. I'm sure your presence will be missed in the forum and we wish you all the best.
LTL Dev. Team
Edited by -Fivr- - 19 January 2011 at 2:32am