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Oh Aham - what are we going to do with you!!! (Page 3)

ShellJA IF-Rockerz
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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:20pm | IP Logged
Well the post become very serious in the couple of hours I was gone.  Will have to come back later to make sense of what people are saying.

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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:24pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by WintersBloom

Originally posted by upasana.diya

Originally posted by WintersBloom

Originally posted by Eesha2

Originally posted by upasana.diya

Originally posted by WintersBloom

Originally posted by upasana.diya



and koki is to blame too... she never corrects Ahem's misunderstandings about Gopi... i believe teej vrat day is an example...

Absolutely Diya, Kokila most of the time will not correct misunderstandings to Aham about Gopi, maybe in the beginning (as mentioned on this forum already) she thought Gopi would be a threat if Aham loved her and cherished her, it would leave her (Kokila) in the cold, where as the power in the household would transfer from Mota Bhabi (Hetal) to next generation Mota Bhabi (Gopi). I remember a conversation she had with Aham in earlier episodes, i want you to work so hard and make so much money that when anyone see's me Kokila Modi they know who's mother i am. That episode aired just when Gopi withdrew her vows and Kokila told him she didn't want anything to distract him from working, you like to work my son.

Teej Vrat, Gopi followed the tradition and broke her fast with the image of Aham (speaking to Kanaji that my husband does not love me) as he insulted her on the phone, by telling her he will have to come to pretend to feed her as if he cares about her, she was insignificant to him. Kokila locked her in the storeroom, Gopi fainted, Mani (the servant) told Kokila everything, she told Gopi to eat and watched her eat too, she should have gone to her son to tell him what had actually occurred, but he was shouting, and walked away angrily. Kokila recognised his mind was set already, nothing she could say would bring him to appreciate Gopi at that time, Kokila perhaps is afraid if she pushe's Aham too much he will walk away from the family, as he threatened to when Gopi washed his laptop, he only came back under the compromise Kokila reached with Gopi to take back the vows of marriage. 

Another example is Kinjal stealing the Raksha Bhadhan jewellery gifts from Kokila's cupboard and hiding them, Kinjal accused Gopi as the thief, but Kokila listened to both Kinjal and Gopi and told Aham (he had started yelling at Gopi) no my daughter in law always speaks the truth, if she says she found the jewellery there she found them there, also she had noticed Kinjal's fingers with soil on them, Kokila had to balance my child being put on the spot in front of everyone as a thief or i speak to her privately, she spoke to her privately and tried to resolve the situation. So in that instance perhaps she could have also gone to tell Aham privately too, what had occurred, Kinjal stole the jewellery. But Aham's temper she was probably afraid of the ruckus he would raise in the house trying to find out why she stole the jewellery to begin with, but perhaps the fact she was dating Umang (Anita's brother) would have come out sooner, and shorten the KInjal track.

Aham's cynicism has led him to believe that they is nothing pure and innocent. Also his temper appears so quickly it's often difficult to speak to him when he has a bee in his bonnet. Recently Kinjal trying to tell him no need to go away she isn't pregnant, he was not ready to listen, Gopi explaining about Shagun 1000's same thing, him being a boss of a company has led him to push other's opinions back and force his through perhaps to convince clients perhaps why ever he does it only the CV's know the answer.

i think you are right about Aham's bursting a nerve if Koki starts explaining things to him...

but what made him into a cynic...
he was the one who left his love....
his mom selected the bride and not the other way round
his kaka recognizes his (Aham's) contribution to company more than his(chirag) own child's

what is there for him to be cynical about... evrything has been going his wayConfusedUnhappy



Exactly Diya I don't understand it either. Everything in life has always gone his way. No one has put a gun to his head. The decisions and choices he made in his life were exactly that, HIS. His arrogance and hot-headed nature prevents him from seeing anything beyond himself. 


It's what he does as an occupation, I think you have got be cynical and stubborn to succeed in big business, to run a large company I mean. Aham is having trouble leaving that cynicism at the office, remember the 13/12/10 episode (Candles and Flowers) the sarcasm why cover your head you have crossed your limits already "she wants something" what is it? to stay in MM. 

Though Gopi took back the vows he has had to do Janmashtami with her, buy her jewellery at Ketki's insistance, dance dandiya with her, declare love to her with a rose(didn't get his way entirely).

Not to forget, his Mom has a Bahu, but that means he cannot marry anybody his tied to the marriage for the Mom's happiness. Because that's the next thing we all will be waiting for now, is Gopi going to leave after the Kinjal Dhawal marriage, what is going to happen when Kokila says to Aham Gopi is not leaving the MM.
 

but isn't that his problem and nothing to concern with Gopi??? so why is he taking out the frustration he is having with his mom's decision on a third party... 
he hasn't done anything for gopi, so why demean her... she is already being abused by people she is caring for... she is not caring for ahem and she is also there on her own sufferance... not like she is very happy being there..

well we basically can't argue for or against a person... Gopi too frustrates me... if i were to get a husband like Ahem and am in Gopi's situation... my silent message would be like "go to hell" and i won't bother with him or his family... my standard answer would be "i don't know, how am i supposed to when u asked me not to interfere"....

I agree with you on that one, his frustrated with how his marriage life has turned out, it was his and Kokila's decision, it's not Gopi to blame BUT HOLD ON ISN'T GOPI TO BLAME TOO? He tried to break it off with Gopi (the letter to say he didn't love her, was it in Kinjal's hand or Aham's hand, that Gopi couldn't read because she's illiterate), on Gopi's "mendhi" night Kinjal revealed to her, her brother's love for Anita, on "their engagement" exchanging of rings (when Gopi reached to place the ring on Aham's finger, he offered no encouragement that he cares for her or smile nothing, he did not look at her at all, then Aham jerked his hand away from her causing the ring to fall down, Anita returned the ring to Gopi, then the second time of asking he didn't extend his hand to Gopi at all to put the ring, she waited for a while before Kokila lifted his hand for Gopi to place the ring, the whole time again Aham didn't look at Gopi he look above Gopi's head at Anita). I kind of feel for Anita.

So all three (Aham, Kokila and Gopi) are to blame for the GoHam relationship, perhaps Gopi thought in her kind hearted way she could win him over by following Baa's instructions and whoever else's advice. 

I think in today's Aham's conversation with Parag is quite telling, I don't think he thinks much about emotions but is more practical in his approach to everything. Also the reason he does well at the office could be this reason too. Also what's frustrating about SNS (one of the thingsLOL) as it's reported from Gopi's perspective (from a young girl's perspective) and we don't get to see the thoughts of Aham. We see Rashi and Gopi's thoughts only, so we don't know what Aham is fighting, has he started to care for Gopi and his hiding that fact or he steadfast ignoring her.

You are right we don't know what he feels. And that does get frustrating. And yeah Gopi didn't realize any of that, but lets face it at the end of the day he married her and she married him. He needs to either live by his vows or if he can't do that than at least treat the girl with a little respect. Don't just throw out all your frustrations and anger on her like a punching bag. And Gopi, that girl seriously needs to learn to stay away from her husband. It's like she likes getting yelled at all the time. So in a way you are right. A part of it is her fault. She knows her husband hates her, so like Diya said she needs to just stay away from him. 
@Diya you are absolutely right girl. If I was in her position I wouldn't stand there and take any of his (excuse my language) C***!

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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:28pm | IP Logged
there is mistake on Gopi's part too... but she was told Ahem loved her by Rashi, whom she still trusts blindly, though she knows some lies that were told to her by Rashi...

but, i can't see how Gopi, an oppressed being, can do anything to stop the wedding... what did Ahem and Kinjal expect her to doConfused? go to her mami and say, i can't marry him or just disappear from earth altogether? her mami would have skinned her alive....Confused

Ahem being the apple of his mother's eye had more say in his marriage than Gopi ever had with anyone.... even Jitu bhai couldn't have helped her once her mami had her mind setupUnhappy

Gopi wasn't even asked if she was okay with the alliance even by Koki?Shocked Kokiji just noticed her, liked her and gave her the shagun... D'oh(someone find a brick and i'll break my own head)

from start till now Gopi never got to say what was in her heart.... i don't know what kind of people her parents were... but she never said anything to anyone and no one even bothered to ask her opinion and she was never encouraged to have an opinion... so i don't see how we can blame her for anything...Cry


Edited by upasana.diya - 17 January 2011 at 4:38pm

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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:31pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by lovtv

Well the post become very serious in the couple of hours I was gone.  Will have to come back later to make sense of what people are saying.



Kaaki, we are never serious serious... just a bit serious... but never severe... right guysWink
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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:43pm | IP Logged
Okay the long script is getting too long, i am just cutting and pasting bits.Wink

@WintesBloom  the next thing we all will be waiting for now, is Gopi going to leave after the Kinjal Dhawal marriage, what is going to happen when Kokila says to Aham Gopi is not leaving the MM, as after the last wooing scene by Gopi on Aham that backfired resulting in tears for Gopi, Kokila said you will surely have the rights as a wife on Aham as you are everyone's darling already. So we will have to wait and see if she leaves or not. Indications from the CV's is that she is going to stay, how they are going to persuade Aham is going to be interesting and worth watching.

Also I fully understand what Diya and Eesha you are saying, who would want to be a punching bag or doormat, Aham's temper flares up quite frequently and he tells her either with a hand gesture or words to stay quiet so he can speak, it's her personality she is extremely patient with him, Kokila has warned her to be like that too.

If a girl like Gopi were to leave what are her options?

Could she work in service in a Mani type job, remarry, return to her Uncle's house. What else.

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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:49pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by WintersBloom

Okay the long script is getting too long, i am just cutting and pasting bits.Wink

@WintesBloom  the next thing we all will be waiting for now, is Gopi going to leave after the Kinjal Dhawal marriage, what is going to happen when Kokila says to Aham Gopi is not leaving the MM, as after the last wooing scene by Gopi on Aham that backfired resulting in tears for Gopi, Kokila said you will surely have the rights as a wife on Aham as you are everyone's darling already. So we will have to wait and see if she leaves or not. Indications from the CV's is that she is going to stay, how they are going to persuade Aham is going to be interesting and worth watching.

Also I fully understand what Diya and Eesha you are saying, who would want to be a punching bag or doormat, Aham's temper flares up quite frequently and he tells her either with a hand gesture or words to stay quiet so he can speak, it's her personality she is extremely patient with him, Kokila has warned her to be like that too.

If a girl like Gopi were to leave what are her options?

Could she work in service in a Mani type job, remarry, return to her Uncle's house. What else.


works for me... but what shall i call you... i realize i still don't know your name...Cry
i don't see Gopi as an assertive being, though we want her to be... so i would bet that she will go back to her Mama's house and do Mani type of job... remarry!!! nopes.... doesn't sound like an option she would prefer...

but as you said indications are all towards Gopi's staying back and facing the demons....

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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:49pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by WintersBloom

Okay the long script is getting too long, i am just cutting and pasting bits.Wink

@WintesBloom  the next thing we all will be waiting for now, is Gopi going to leave after the Kinjal Dhawal marriage, what is going to happen when Kokila says to Aham Gopi is not leaving the MM, as after the last wooing scene by Gopi on Aham that backfired resulting in tears for Gopi, Kokila said you will surely have the rights as a wife on Aham as you are everyone's darling already. So we will have to wait and see if she leaves or not. Indications from the CV's is that she is going to stay, how they are going to persuade Aham is going to be interesting and worth watching.

Also I fully understand what Diya and Eesha you are saying, who would want to be a punching bag or doormat, Aham's temper flares up quite frequently and he tells her either with a hand gesture or words to stay quiet so he can speak, it's her personality she is extremely patient with him, Kokila has warned her to be like that too.

If a girl like Gopi were to leave what are her options?

Could she work in service in a Mani type job, remarry, return to her Uncle's house. What else.


You are right about that one. It will def be an interesting watch to see Ahem's reaction. I think that is what we are all looking forward to watching. 

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Posted: 17 January 2011 at 4:51pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by upasana.diya

Originally posted by lovtv

Well the post become very serious in the couple of hours I was gone.  Will have to come back later to make sense of what people are saying.



Kaaki, we are never serious serious... just a bit serious... but never severe... right guysWink

Hi Shelly aka Lovtv - that's right, i am typing loads only because i'm trying to get to the bottom of the matter, this Aham why is he the way he is and what is going on in the show with Gopi and Aham. So it's like analysing the two of them. So Diya and I are not arguing don't worry. Eesha i think from what i have gathered is agreeing with Diya's viewpoint.


Edited by WintersBloom - 17 January 2011 at 4:51pm

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