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Yeh Rishta Kya Kehlata Hai
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personal issues and Indian homes (Page 3)

moonlight08 IF-Rockerz

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Posted: 13 January 2011 at 11:24am | IP Logged
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Madhavi_Diblack.swan

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Posted: 13 January 2011 at 12:55pm | IP Logged

Kaumudi,

You are right. Perhaps, I myself become too linear in refuting the reality altogether from the script. All is not so straight forward black and white and our society is not entirely de-traditionalized. And something close to this may well be a way life for some.

What I really meant was the exaggeration, excess and illogic present in the script and its limited scope to represent the entire society. For however numerous example in real India, this is certainly not reflecting it entirely, which was the question of thread starter ('India'). In Mumbai even in many Marwari families (many friends'), these rigid traditions (ghunghats etc.) are discarded way back. At least in my milieu (Gujarati Jain) no one would take trouble to be so meddlesome (babies etc.) or would dare treat women with out respect due.

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Madhavi_Dimoonlight08

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Posted: 13 January 2011 at 9:42pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by smrth

Originally posted by _charu_

Originally posted by smrth

 @ Polki_Zofi

Very apt observations and relevant post. But as you must have had first hand experience living in India, nobody actually lives the way these illogically scripted T.V. serials are portraying. Actually most of them are portraying only a stereotype and artificial 'idealism' which is not even 'ideal' anymore, in reality, or no one is perusing it in actual practice. I agree with your POV and that is the logic in real life.

But in their convoluted logic of soap world, what they are showing is Heroine's resilience and strength to surpass so many adversities in old 'traditional' ways and her ultimate triumph in winning over her adopted family. By their standard, she is actually rejoicing at keeping her 'flock' together and happy- over and above the inevitable compromise of her own 'personal' comforts. For her, that is the duty which she has taken a vow about, the day she married and entered this household. And towards this, she will move on unwaveringly- many a time even at variance with the helpful Husband whose proclivity towards personal freedom will often clash with her sense of duty. What is more, in the end, even Husband will stand gratified at his wife's unfaltering discharge of 'duty' towards his family and will applaud her. For them this is the strength of the lead character- not her weakness. Only digression from this stereotype 'Bahu' of Indian soaps is her frequent lies in this serial. By even soap standards they are way too frequent and not at all reflecting any reality either.

 


and it's shown that there is only one way of  keeping the adopted family happy..to agree to whatever they say...

Hey Charu- long time not seen!Big smile

I was trying to point out the serial maker's one dimensional, far from reality, linear way of scripting. Only things they borrow from the reality is a set-up (two three families), ambience and some plausible character sketches. Then on, after some initial brilliance or some occasional flashes in the pan, nothing stays real and we are stretched to find relevance-which we do, after allowing for these fables' soap drama nature.


completely agree...one more thing which i'm saying repeatedly ke i dun relate to is akshara's choices..which wife wud want not want to go with her husband on an outing and do ghar ka kaam instead Dead ask a woman frm any strata of the society..dhoodh wali to kaam wali to MBAs ! 

yes, a bahu has a lot more responsibilities..she has to maintain a balance b/w her husband and her in laws, make sure peace prevails and they dun think that bahu has controlled their son..but how many of us do it at the cost of our happiness and personal life? frm her marriage till date, MU always happened bec. of Nandini, Gayitri, BM, or Daddaji..it was never naitik and akshara..or was it? i dun remember.....the girl has abs no individuality..her motto is that elders are always right bec. they have raised us..it's getting too much now...the good old akshara is back with bhainsa now Dead

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black.swanbeautiful16moonlight08

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Posted: 13 January 2011 at 9:49pm | IP Logged
Originally posted by moonlight08

Originally posted by gutky

 
Originally posted by moonlight08

Originally posted by gutky


again awesome post kaumudi.. u are seriously inspiring me these days...Clap Clap n i also agree wid madhavi...Cry i  myself being marwadi relate to this show very much.. its sad to admit but characters protrayed in this show  like nani, baisa, n even dadi are very much real n do exit in our community...girls are not given that much liberty as compared to guys.. family's expectations are always higher on girls like they need to look good, cook well, speak softly, should keep fast for gud husband, should play a role model of good daughter, wife, DIl, n even mother...Deadright from their childhood they are refrain from getting good education, going out alone even for a movie its a big deal for them, in short they are trained to be dependent on their spouse for every small things..Angry but i do feel this trend is changing slowly for the better.. their mentality is growing wider with changing time ...i hope it improves faster with the present scenario.. Big smile
ah.. im honoured di.!!!! thanx for this.. these are just feeling taking form of words.. nothing else.!!
well.. neways.. u r rite.. the trend is changing.. but.. it is on a very slow pace.. n there are still miles to go before we actually call ourselves "modern" and at pace with other cultures.. not the western culture specifically.. but the other indian cultures as well.. lyk the maharashtrian and the punjabi culture.. ppl.. especially women are at much more ease when we look at them.. the ppl are not very stringent when it cumz to following rules.. unlike in rajasthani culture.. where ghunghat na rakho to bus.. aasman hi gir padega abhi.!!

ROFL i understand ur emotions but all these things happens in remote Rajasthan ... in metropolitan cities girls are equally important ..in fact they are turning out to be better than men in each field.. be it education, career, health etc... yaah some sorts of restrictions are still prevalent but i think that can be easily ignored...Big smile coming to the point since the show is based on rural udaipur in rajasthan.. its very much real n hence many ppl relate to this show very easily.. but also the show highlights on marwadi culture n tradition with their beautiful songs, their big houses, plot, eating habits, etc..in the end makes the show worth watching...LOL 
times mite be changing di.. but not in my house for sure.. my mother still has to keep ghunghat in front of my grandfather.. though itz been 18 years of my mothers marriage with my father.. still.. rules hav not changed for us.. we may be living in delhi.. but my mother still has to wear sarees and keep the ghunghat on in front of him.. dat's the way he lyks it.. women are.. of course better than men.. be it education and all.. that's all true di.. but.. we hav to accept ki these things.. which are typical of a marwadi culture do exist even now.. n not just my family m taking as a reference.. my neighbour.. they too r marwadi.. n they are even sticter than us.. the whole north delhi.. is filled with baniyas from rajasthan and haryana and there u see.. women still wear sarees.. cover their head in front of their in-laws..
m not saying that times are not changing.. they certainly are.. but.. oh.. watever.. leave it.. i hav so many thots in  my mind but dnt realy noe how to transform them into words..
 
but the show.. yeah.. it is definitely worth a watch.. dat's y m still here defending it.!!!

Kamudi, traditional marwari families and ppl. of the age of baisa and nani must be conservative but what about today;s generation? Udaipur, as i know, should not be THAT backward...specially families like Singhanias..see, they use every modern gadget & luxery, sent their son abroad to study..i dun think these well to do families who are exposed to modern culture can remain so much conservative....specially with "hum bahar ki mithai nahi khate" and achar papad r homemade and movies nahi jaana and girls should not work or study, girl and boy must not talk before marriage...

ur right..i dun how how u related punjabi culture with modernism but yes, i've never seen singhania type families in my life...i'm in chandigarh n my parents currently reside in Noida but i was born and brought up in Gwalior..it's a town in MP...kehne ko it used to be a small town but i never saw this conservativeness over there in any family..yes, i saw my mom and aunties and all neighbours wearing saarees, less of salwar suites...my dadi's saas was like baisa but she herself is so sweet, caring and adjusting, she never put any restriction on my mom or chachis..or her grandchildren...she kept her views, her traditions to herself...if she took pallu, she never asked my mom to do it..so it depends on person to person....akshara's dadi is of same gen. of nani and baisa but she's exactly the opposite...


Edited by _charu_ - 13 January 2011 at 9:57pm

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siya16Madhavi_Dimoonlight08_Divya_

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Posted: 14 January 2011 at 12:40am | IP Logged
Originally posted by _charu_

Originally posted by moonlight08

Originally posted by gutky

 
Originally posted by moonlight08

Originally posted by gutky


again awesome post kaumudi.. u are seriously inspiring me these days...Clap Clap n i also agree wid madhavi...Cry i  myself being marwadi relate to this show very much.. its sad to admit but characters protrayed in this show  like nani, baisa, n even dadi are very much real n do exit in our community...girls are not given that much liberty as compared to guys.. family's expectations are always higher on girls like they need to look good, cook well, speak softly, should keep fast for gud husband, should play a role model of good daughter, wife, DIl, n even mother...Deadright from their childhood they are refrain from getting good education, going out alone even for a movie its a big deal for them, in short they are trained to be dependent on their spouse for every small things..Angry but i do feel this trend is changing slowly for the better.. their mentality is growing wider with changing time ...i hope it improves faster with the present scenario.. Big smile
ah.. im honoured di.!!!! thanx for this.. these are just feeling taking form of words.. nothing else.!!
well.. neways.. u r rite.. the trend is changing.. but.. it is on a very slow pace.. n there are still miles to go before we actually call ourselves "modern" and at pace with other cultures.. not the western culture specifically.. but the other indian cultures as well.. lyk the maharashtrian and the punjabi culture.. ppl.. especially women are at much more ease when we look at them.. the ppl are not very stringent when it cumz to following rules.. unlike in rajasthani culture.. where ghunghat na rakho to bus.. aasman hi gir padega abhi.!!

ROFL i understand ur emotions but all these things happens in remote Rajasthan ... in metropolitan cities girls are equally important ..in fact they are turning out to be better than men in each field.. be it education, career, health etc... yaah some sorts of restrictions are still prevalent but i think that can be easily ignored...Big smile coming to the point since the show is based on rural udaipur in rajasthan.. its very much real n hence many ppl relate to this show very easily.. but also the show highlights on marwadi culture n tradition with their beautiful songs, their big houses, plot, eating habits, etc..in the end makes the show worth watching...LOL 
times mite be changing di.. but not in my house for sure.. my mother still has to keep ghunghat in front of my grandfather.. though itz been 18 years of my mothers marriage with my father.. still.. rules hav not changed for us.. we may be living in delhi.. but my mother still has to wear sarees and keep the ghunghat on in front of him.. dat's the way he lyks it.. women are.. of course better than men.. be it education and all.. that's all true di.. but.. we hav to accept ki these things.. which are typical of a marwadi culture do exist even now.. n not just my family m taking as a reference.. my neighbour.. they too r marwadi.. n they are even sticter than us.. the whole north delhi.. is filled with baniyas from rajasthan and haryana and there u see.. women still wear sarees.. cover their head in front of their in-laws..
m not saying that times are not changing.. they certainly are.. but.. oh.. watever.. leave it.. i hav so many thots in  my mind but dnt realy noe how to transform them into words..
 
but the show.. yeah.. it is definitely worth a watch.. dat's y m still here defending it.!!!

Kamudi, traditional marwari families and ppl. of the age of baisa and nani must be conservative but what about today;s generation? Udaipur, as i know, should not be THAT backward...specially families like Singhanias..see, they use every modern gadget & luxery, sent their son abroad to study..i dun think these well to do families who are exposed to modern culture can remain so much conservative....specially with "hum bahar ki mithai nahi khate" and achar papad r homemade and movies nahi jaana and girls should not work or study, girl and boy must not talk before marriage...

ur right..i dun how how u related punjabi culture with modernism but yes, i've never seen singhania type families in my life...i'm in chandigarh n my parents currently reside in Noida but i was born and brought up in Gwalior..it's a town in MP...kehne ko it used to be a small town but i never saw this conservativeness over there in any family..yes, i saw my mom and aunties and all neighbours wearing saarees, less of salwar suites...my dadi's saas was like baisa but she herself is so sweet, caring and adjusting, she never put any restriction on my mom or chachis..or her grandchildren...she kept her views, her traditions to herself...if she took pallu, she never asked my mom to do it..so it depends on person to person....akshara's dadi is of same gen. of nani and baisa but she's exactly the opposite...

exactly charu dii.. that is wat i meant 2 say earlier...Big smile @ kaumudi as u mentioned earlier in ur post it depends upon family to family...i belong to a nuclear family in Mumbai n my family is residing here since more than 25 yrs..even i'm  banya n my father is also very conservative by nature, but then he also understands today's generation n has accepted some modernity in his lifestyle too.. in fact my whole society is filled with marwadi banyas n Brahmin's... there are more than 50 flats in my building..n i've noticed most of the ladies prefer wearing suits rather than sarees, they are highly qualified, independent n enjoying their respective jobs, they go 4 outings, n are always engaged in some sorts of activities.... n surprisingly their in-laws have no issues n are really fine with it.... may be the section of society where i live is more modern than urs, but i do believe that the trend and mentality which ppl used 2 have earlier has changed completely atleast in cities..Big smile


Edited by gutky - 14 January 2011 at 4:12am

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