Joined: 14 August 2009
Intriguing preview. Looking forwards to reading the update when you have the time.
Joined: 25 July 2008
Very interesting, Dil Di. Can't wait to read more, but please do take your time. Focus on your studies first.
Joined: 16 October 2010
Joined: 10 December 2010
Joined: 01 October 2006
Joined: 28 July 2006
I have now officially updated all my FFs. Although, I am not too happy with this update, so please do forgive me if you do not like it and does not match up to your expectations. I tried to write this in a better way, but this is all I could get out.
The next update that I will be working on is for Hume Tumse Hua Hai Pyaar, so look out for that one as well.
Please comment whether you like it or not.
Chapter 4 A:
"Hurry Nishikant, we don't have time. The pundit ji will ask for her to be brought down any moment now," Uday Walia rasps stressfully to his longtime friend. He closes the door to the bedroom which he has just entered, intervening in on a private moment between a father and daughter. Uday halts in his steps as he sees the bride's face buried in her father's chest and he pacifying her with embracing arms. Nishikant raises his head and Uday sees tears lining in his eyes, knowing now that he has come during an emotional time.
"Yes, I know. I just needed a moment with her. …. Have you… Have you explained everything to Jai?" Nishikant asks once clearing his throat, gathering himself.
On hearing the groom's name, the bride openly weeps alarming both men in the room. She detaches herself from her father and buries her face into her trembling hands.
"Bani?" Nishikant questions in surprise, not knowing what to do with his daughter's sudden outburst as he has never seen her behave in this manner before. Uday looks on concerned as well.
"….. He hates me, doesn't he? … He doesn't want to marry me," she whispers, crestfallen and helpless in her given situation.
Before Nishikant can make any action of consoling her, Uday approaches the distraught young girl looking even younger in the bridal attire she adorns that was not originally meant for her.
"Bani beta… look at me….," he gently commands. She slowly removes her fingers aside, revealing her swollen red eyes. He is relieved that she obediently listens, showing that she is in a state where she is willing to understand. He affectionately cups her cheeks with his hands, wiping away her running tears with his thumbs.
"You have my word…. Your husband will love you no matter in what circumstances you two were brought together..... He may not love you now, but he will not be able to resist you for too long….I believe that you can win him over, dear…. You are an extraordinarily beautiful girl inside and out…. And one day he will see this…. Trust me."
Leaning forward, he places a tender kiss onto her forehead and Bani closes her eyes, letting his spoken words soothe over the turmoil that had been building within her. With utmost care, Uday lowers her veil over her face and gives her away along with her father, leaving her feeling secure and safe until left alone with her husband later that night…..
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4:47 PM, Tuesday
Sahar International Airport
Crossing the threshold of the flight's gate, Bani felt a wave of nostalgia hit her instantly taking her by surprise and halting her briefly in her steps. She is left momentarily speechless as her gaze wanders all over, taking in her surroundings. She can't manage to believe that she is back in India after four long years. After abandoning her homeland abruptly and leaving her family behind, she never thought she'd step back in this place that held bittersweet memories for her. Mumbai was a place where she was loved and cherished as well as left heartbroken and devastated.
Her father treated Bani and Rano as the apples of his eyes. He never failed them as a father, going out of his way for their happiness. Bani had no dearth concerning love from her father. He was there for her always. However, she rarely speaks to her father now. After her disastrous marriage, Nishikant sold her childhood home and isolated himself from everyone by joining a secluded ashram. He continues to reside there, wanting to seek peace after having to see his daughter's life fall into crumbles and witness his best friend go before his time. Can she reestablish that lost relationship with her father?
Uday Uncle acted as another father figure, spoiling her much to her constant protests. He welcomed her into his family as one of his own children. He never differentiated her from his other children, treating her as another daughter of his. She was his pride and glory. But once that pride and glory left him, he fell into a depression that took his life. He is now forever gone. She doesn't have Uday Uncle to run to whenever she wishes. She can never speak to him about whatever is on her mind or receive the special attention he'd give her. Can she bear to go back and be haunted by his missing presence?
Mausi was the mother she'd always wanted as a child since her own mother died after giving birth to Rano. She loved and cared for her. She guided and admonished her when needed. She supported her and encouraged her to be a better person. She has spent all these years being away from her mother. How will she be able to face her now after having turned her back on her? Never looking back once?
And how about the others? Aditya Bhaiya, Jigyasa Didi, Ranveer, and Anu? Those who treated her as a part of their family? Gave her so much love? How can she look them in the eye after not having spoken to them after so many years? Will they forgive her for being so cold-hearted? For being so cruel?
As a sinking feeling begins to settle in the pit of her stomach once these realizations dawn upon her, she hears a gruff voice behind her demand sarcastically, "Are you going to keep walking or would you like for someone to carry you?"
Blinking away the forming tears and shaking away the apprehension that was sieging her, Bani turns behind and stares up at Jai Walia standing over her gallantly. She glares bitterly at him and chooses to ignore him rather than bicker with him. She carries forward, walking a few steps ahead of him toward the luggage pick-up area.
She waits near the baggage area, trying to locate her suitcase and ignores his lingering presence standing behind her. The less she speaks to him, the better. And especially now, with the various emotions consuming her, it'd be best that she didn't speak to him at all.
He is responsible for everything that happened. He is responsible for changing her life, responsible for making her go away. And he is responsible for making her come back and face everything that she had left behind. She hates him. She hates him with every being inside of her.
Spotting her suitcase approaching, she makes a movement to step forward but sees Jai Walia reach forward the moving belt. Temporarily she considers the fact that he is doing the gentlemanly thing by getting her luggage for her but is proven wrong as he grabs the black duffel bag belonging to him, completing ignoring her suitcase beside it. Fuming inwardly and scolding herself for expecting anything out of him, she leaps forward and grabs the heavy suitcase, struggling to pull out the handle. As she tries to figure this out, Jai carries on without her, enraging her even more. She begins to drag the suitcase after her, trying to reach up to him since she doesn't know where to go from here. Just as she approaches him and ready to give a piece of her mind, she instantly forgets her sprung up anger by the sight before her…..
"Jai,… how was your flight?" she hears him ask in the usual joyful tone he spoke in. Almost instantly her spirits are lifted by the sound.
"It was a flight, Aditya… What do you expect?" Jai retorts flatly, unaffected as always by his cheery attitude.
"Ah, didn't go so well I see…," Aditya observes loudly, making Jai cast him a curt look.
"Can we just go?" he huffs, wanting to get out of the airport after suffering a long flight and not hang around needlessly.
"Yeah, I've got the car running outsi-----..," his voice falters and Jai curiously follows his stunned gaze to behind him.
"…. Bani?.... Bani, is that really you?" Aditya questions in surprise as his eyes trail over, landing onto her standing figure. Disbelief registers onto his face and slowly his eyes shine with excitement. He takes a good look at her before walking toward her and scooping her up in his arms. Bani, at first taken back, eases in his warm embrace. Tears line her eyes as she soaks in the warmth of the hug from who she considered a brother.
"Oh my god, Bani, I can't believe it! I can't believe it's actually you!" Aditya continues to exclaim, both delighted and skeptic, reeling from the fact that she is standing before him after so many years.
".. Yes, Aditya bhaiya, it is actually me," she affirms in a chocked voice, her emotions reaching its height. She, however, manages to plaster a wide, bright smile onto her face. Aditya releases her a good moment later and continues to take her all in.
"My god, you have changed…. It is so good to see you! I have missed you!"
"I have missed you too, bhaiya," she answers in all honesty.
"Bani, I don't even know where to begin! There is so much I want to ask! Where have you been all these years! Why didn't you ever call? How have you been? What have you---..," Aditya rambles on until intervened rudely by Jai who snaps at both of them.
"Save your little sappy reunion till later… at this rate, we'll be at the airport all day," he remarks callously. Aditya and Bani together share an exasperated look and end up smiling as a result. He throws an arm around Bani's shoulder whilst taking her luggage from her to carry.
"Come Bani, let's carry on with our way before his majesty has a royal fit," Aditya quips with a lopsided smile fueling Jai's annoyance further as Bani laughs from his dig. Jai walks begrudgingly behind both brother and sister who talk nonstop on the walk to the car, paying least attention to him.
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5:56 PM, Tuesday
Breach Candy Hospital
Bani steps outside of the car, closing the door shut before her gaze falls onto the building laid out in front of her. The feeling of anxiety grips her once again, leaving her angst. It is Aditya who breaks into her whirling thoughts. He places a comforting touch onto her shoulder. She gives him a small smile, appreciating his silent support.
"Here…," she hears Jai Walia's rough voice speak to her. She turns and looks to him, seeing apathy on his face. Is he really unconcerned by all of this? Does none of this affect him in anyway? How is it that he can be so cool and collected when she on the other hand is a complete mess?
She watches him reach into his trouser pocket and withdraw a small container and a beaded chain. On a closer look, she realizes what the items are.
"Put these on…," he directs, handing the items over to her. She takes them hesitantly with an outstretched hand and looks on as he drops them into her palm. She stares at them with foreign eyes.
He catches her stare intently at the objects. "Don't feel flattered, I didn't save them for sentimental reasons," he adds. Aditya flashes him a look.
"Jai, there is a better way in telling her…," he reprimands to deaf hears.
After having to hear Aditya and Bani's emotional reunion on the drive here, Jai's level of annoyance has soared rocket high. Besides, his sympathy for his ex-wife has been non-existent from the start. Why should he be sympathetic now? She's not the only one who has to put up a farce. This is as much of an unwelcomed inconvenience to him as it is to her.
"Whatever," he breathes under his breath before carrying on forward, leaving Aditya and Bani behind to her thoughts.
"… I am sorry Bani.. I know how difficult this is for you," he says to her sympathetically, understanding the situation she has been placed in. Bani grips onto the items tight, clenching her fingers around them, and nods her head gently.
"I knew what I was getting into by coming here, bhaiya… Don't worry, I am fine," she assures him even though she hasn't been able to reassure herself since boarding the flight.
Aditya smiles kindly while placing a hand on her back. "Let's get you properly ready before Mausi sees you…," he suggests warmly, leading her toward the sliding doors of the hospital.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
She stares at herself in the mirror for a long while, unable to register how she looks with her parting filled with dark vermillion and her once bare neck now adorned with the weight of her old mangulsutra which she had only worn for a couple of hours after the wedding before discarding it. She felt strange and highly discomforted by the way she appears… like a married woman.
Different emotions overcome her all at once. She questions herself for the hundredth time. Is she doing the right thing by going along with this charade? Can she stand to be acknowledged as Jai Walia's wife even if it is only a pretense? She doesn't know how she feels about all this anymore. This doesn't feel right. These items feel like a noose, suffocating her with what they symbolize.
The sudden knocking on the bathroom door causes her to jump.
"Bani, are you ready?"
Taking a last long look at herself, she takes in a deep breath before opening the door and revealing herself to Aditya, who stood patiently outside for the past minutes. He smiles almost sadly on the sight of her and places a hand on her head as a gesture of affection.
"It's all for a good cause, .. just remember that," he offers for a reason. She nods her head in understanding.
"Come… Jai is checking us in," he urges her to follow, which she does silently. They approach Jai at the front desk, whose back remains faced to them. He converses with the nurse briefly before getting the permission to go on with his way.
He turns around and halts when seeing Aditya and Bani standing nearby, staring at him. He is tempted to make some comment on how long they have taken, but clamps his mouth shut as his gaze fixates onto Bani.
He suddenly finds himself at a loss for words as he takes in the image of her parting filled and her mangulsutra strapped securely around her neck… looking like a wife, his wife. This image troubles him more than it should. He darts his gaze elsewhere and treads onward wordlessly, expecting them to follow after him.
He halts outside his destination, lingering by the door of the private room and casts a backward glance in their way.
"Wait out here…," he commands without properly even looking at her. Bani watches quietly as he twists the doorknob and pushes through the door, leaving it open after he disappears into the room. Her heart races and she becomes edgy on the thought of seeing Mausi after so many years. She grips hard onto the mangulsutra resting onto her chest as emotions take over her once again….
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
She weeps on the front porch of her house where she currently is left all alone, sitting on the swing set, her feet dangling from the floor. She sniffles while wiping away her tears by the sleeve of her school uniform. Her eyes grow swollen from the consistent crying on the way home from school. Her heart is heavy with pent up emotion that she wishes to now release.
Feeling the sudden touch of a hand on her back, she stiffens in her place and holds in her breath. Turning around quickly to see who the intruder is, she stares into the face of a woman, who stares with calm, soothing brown eyes filled with concern.
"Bani beta… kya hua?" the woman expresses in worry, never having seen the little ten year old girl so upset before. Bani's honey brown eyes fill once more. Instead of answering, she breaks into further sobs, alarming the older woman greatly who takes the child into her arms, hoping to provide solace for the lonely girl.
"Arre… yeh kya baath hai? Why are you crying so much, dear? What has upset you?" she pries, wanting the girl to confide in her. Several long moments pass by till Bani settles down and murmurs gently in between tears.
"… Mausi, … today we made cakes at school because it is Mother's Day… all the girls and boys in my class got to give their cakes to their mother… but I have no one to give mine because I don't have a mother….," she cries, shattered by the realization that she is motherless and always will be. Mausi's gaze glides over to the far end of the swing where a white box sits idly, most likely containing the cake Bani had baked.
"Oh ho… toh yeh baath hai… Accha, why don't you give me your cake then?" Mausi proposes warmly, causing Bani to lift her head and stare dumbstruck at the woman.
"But Mausi… it is a Mother's Day cake… and you are not my mother…," she innocently informs, not caring to think that she could hurt Mausi's feelings by her blunt words. However, Mausi seems unaffected by it since she simply smiles in return. She taps Bani's forehead, startling her.
"Pagli… Who says that I am not your mother? Don't I love you? Don't I care for you? Don't I look after for you? Haven't I raised you? … If I am not your mother, then who is? You tell me which woman loves you more than I do?"
Bani blinks dumbly at her, not having an answer to any of her questions. Silently she knew that Mausi is right, no woman has taken so much care for her other than herself. If Bani's mother was still alive, she'd imagine that she'd be similar to Mausi.
"Bani beta… A woman giving birth to a child does not make her a mother… Her love, affection, care, and support is what makes her into a mother. I have not given birth to you… but I have done all these things, haven't I?"
Bani nods her head in agreement, her tears coming to an end. Mausi wipes away the remaining dampness on her plum cheeks and admonishes her sternly.
"Now… don't you ever say to me again that I am not your mother… or else I will stop doing all those things…. understood?"
"Yes Mausi," she replies promptly and allows the woman to gather her back into her embrace. She closes her eyes, resting her head onto her chest, and feels a sweet kiss planted on the top of her head.
"I am lucky to have you as my mother, Mausi…," she whispers whilst clinging tightly onto her mother, a wave of comfort and assurance cleansing her from her previous despair…
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"Munna… .. Munna, you have come?"
Her voice. Her gentle, warm, and loving voice. Her heart leaps on the sound, breaking her out of her dazed state of mind. Oh how she has missed hearing her soothing tone when Bani was upset… her scolding tone when Bani did something wrong….her encouraging tone when Bani needed her support…her affectionate tone when Bani wanted to be showered in love. Right now, she didn't understand which one she wanted the most… Did she want to be soothed, scolded, encouraged, or mollycoddled? Then and there she decided that she wanted them all.
"Ji, Mausi… How are you feeling now?" she continues to hear Jai Walia greet respectfully. Never once did he fail to speak to his mother figure with respect. She supposes he won't ever.
"I am feeling better now, Munna… Just tired is all… I do not want to say here any longer."
"Well there is good news, Mausi. Your doctor says that you can be discharged today if you'd like!" Aditya speaks promisingly, drawing attention onto himself.
"Yes Aditya beta… I want to go home," Bani can envision Mausi's lively smile through her pleased words.
"Mausi… I think it is better if you stay here for another day or two… just so the doctors can carefully observe you to avoid any possible complications…," Jai voices his concerns on the matter.
"Nahi… main bilkul teek hoon…. Mujhe ghar jhana hai… I want to see my children… I want to be with my family," Mausi insists stubbornly, silencing Jai since he knows she will not adhere to his wish.
"Arre, but we can bring family here to you… Look here, we have brought one of your children along with us…," Aditya pipes in cheerfully, directing to the door, where Mausi looks over to curiously. She grimaces when seeing no one.
"Where? I do not see anyone….," Mausi complains openly, keeping her gaze fixed onto the doorway.
Bani takes in a sharp breath and tenses immediately as the attention is quickly averting onto her. She cowers outside the room, not knowing whether she is ready to meet the important woman of her past or not.
"Mausi… look closely… Do not tell me that you cannot see one of your own children? You tell us who it is….," Aditya adds encouragingly, wanting the woman to guess who has come to see her.
A concentrated, pensive look unfolds onto the elderly woman's face as she fixates her sole focus onto the open doorway. She catches the sudden sight of a lurking figure. It takes her only a second to realize who it is, even by the faintest glimpse, as she cannot mistake any one of her children.
"….. Bani beta?" she calls out in affection, yearning to see the face of her daughter-in-law who has been kept out of sights since the moment she awoke. A stilling moment later, the aged woman sees the figure slowly peep out of its hiding place and reveal itself.
Billo Singhania looks on at the young female before her, standing timidly to herself, and her gorgeous eyes sparkling with wet tears. She feels her own eyes grow moist and her heart swell, overjoyed by seeing the girl she loved with all her heart transformed into a beautifully ethereal woman.
"Mausi…," Bani says emotionally, feeling her throat clog while fighting back forming tears.
All that Mausi had to do was lift her arms beckoningly for Bani to oblige and fall into them...resting her face against her shoulder while being held securely in her mother's loving arms.
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