Originally posted by --Hope--
Niki,KoolDi and any others - she and many others have posted bfor also that - it is their world view that they see no fun in arguing about a show when one can make funny comments.So when they see arguments,they try to get us to let go of it ,that is all.
Pls understand that their intention is not trash anybody's rights to debate.
Niki it was a serious comment from her asking us to joke instead of debate,if you did not understand my post.
Fifi has asked me to stop arguing too bfor.Hope has done it in the COmmentary when we had an absolutely normal heated debate.If ppl like Fifi and Jaanu are asking us to go light on a debate sometimes,I see something positive and constructive in their outlook.Whether they address me or you or anybody else.Why take it as negative criticism?
And as each one of us have a different philosophy of life,each one of us definitely have a bias.Why take it as a negative criticism?
I see much ado about nothing Niki.
I did not want to step into this very interesting dialogue but considering my name was taken as indicated in bold above I thought it was necessary to say something to the above.
to begin with let me do mind googling's job.
this is what I really said.Kools, your thread and this forum seems to have become very heated and divided over Archu and Dharmesh.
I saw your point of view and the opposing and I wanted to drop my two cents in but I seriously am hesitant.
the atmosphere in the entire forum seems to be toxic. I have heard more subjective arguments than objective ones and i am afraid my POV will not help. So I will refrain. I know it appears cowardly but today for the first time I felt the light heartedness surrounding our debates is vanishing and we are taking Archu's defence and Dharmesh's prosecution at a very personal level.
we are all friends here, in my opinion. some steadfast and some casual.
yet today I saw a tone in many posts that was tactfully put "unfriendly"
If this is what a show can do to friends then who needs the show or the debate?
And to make sure that my comments and intent above are not being interpreted or misinterpreted - my post did not ask people NOT to debate and rather make funny comments (I offered no instructions just posted a rhetorical question - I am nobody to ask any forum member to debate or not debate etc. - it is an open and public venue). My point was when debating we should not use hidden sarcasm or blunt rudeness to make a point. I have even seen character attacks on other forum members done in a very subtle manner (with laughing faces and a lot of smiley faces) while debating. I like debating - why would I tell people to stop debating?
Just so that I am not misused as a precedent for a post such as the one that has caused such a furor here.
I stand by what I wrote then - our comments should be objective and the tone of our posts friendly otherwise the fun of watching the show and then debating is lost.
Oh and by the way, the debate you mentioned was not normal - there was a lot of hidden sarcasm and barbs that was apparent to someone not participating in that particular debate itself. If it was a normal heated debate I would have jumped right in.
Hi Hope -
In my opinion,I felt the debate was a normal heated one that day,and several others later said so too in the same thread.
From what I know no post was reported to the moderators,and the owner of the thread ,also did not address anybody about anything being 'unfriendly'.
To whomever I addressed a post to and whoever addressed a post to me that day,none of them told me I was unfriendly and I did not tell any of them they were unfriendly either.
If you found anything not normal,I leave it between you and whoever seemed 'unfriendly' on that day to you,to clarify between yourselves if there was any bad intent on that day.
As this is an open forum,what is objective itself is subjective
.I do not know what is objective for your standards,and I do not set any for others.So,I can't clarify anything further on it.Whether ppl take it to a personal level,yes,so many give their personal life accounts and relate it to their debates,I have seen it too.
Yes I agree with you,comments against forum members have been happening,very sadly.I remember somebody had written that they find some posts only oratorical,with no content.I was shocked that such personal evaluations are made publicly.
Yes,there are threads which use sarcasm consistently as a means of giving tadka to their opinions.If anybody is offended,my recommendation is to either stay away from the thread or discuss with that person or group what they find in particular offensive,in order to give them as well as others a fair chance to clarify themselves.
In my honest opinion,using smileys,along with what you can only write,provides expressions that do count and nothing makes a scene more pleasant and easy going than a smile and a lauf ! They are signs of light-heartedness for some,if it is not for others,I can only say to each their own SOH
I indicated you,Fifi and Jaanu as those who have addressed their concern about a debate at some time,to show that expressing such concern is not new - which is what I understood you did on that day,as you addressed everybody in general,and none in particular.
I explained to Niki that Jaanu also said she is addressing in general and not anybody in particular.Just as your intention seemed as if to promote 'friendliness', as you mentioned you were against 'unfriendliness' in that thread,I was explaining that Jaanu's intention behind her post also was to promote 'friendliness' in this thread in her own way.
I know you do debate,so I did not mention your name in the 'world view' who are pro-funny comments and anti-argument sentence.If you had any misunderstanding of any misuse of your name,I hope it is clarified now.If you still have any,feel free to address me.
Every thread has a mood,and in this thread ppl have addressed each other with nicknames,have called each other crazy and many adjectives/adverbs,lots of banter happens consistently and Jaanu has been a part of them as well,so many of us who have been with her did not find her terminologies offensive and understand this gud person's gud intentions- as Niki said she felt shocked and bad about Jaanu's way of addressing,I wanted to clear any misunderstanding between them as I know both of them.I stand by what I wrote.
If you still have any questions,feel free to ask me.
Edited by SaffyFlower - 05 January 2011 at 7:13pm