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Mayank&Nupur:HumSafar - Last Part Page 37 (Page 12)

Nirvrithi Goldie
Nirvrithi
Nirvrithi

Joined: 29 June 2010
Posts: 1805

Posted: 07 January 2011 at 9:16pm | IP Logged
Hey Sajjal -
 
You don't have to be sorry or embarassed at all Smile  Only the basic concept is same.. And especially with this update, you prove your story is entirely different..
 
I loved this part too much. In any other situation ,I wouldnt have supported what Mayank did.. but his intention was pure ,he didnt want Nupur to regret later.. and Nupur also didnt find anything wrong there.
I loved the way you handled the whole partThumbs Up
 
Just worried that what Mayank would have done in past.. No,no- I dont want to hear extra marital affair.. In that case, I will never ever want Nupur to forgive himConfused So..pls..find some other reason, yet valid and convincing.  But as u said, if its based on true story -hmm..okay..as u wish.. Smile

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cutiepie12JaeeDevRathorethousandmiles-Mansi-stuti123

kirti123 IF-Dazzler
kirti123
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Joined: 21 December 2009
Posts: 4333

Posted: 07 January 2011 at 10:46pm | IP Logged
simply amazing
just wating for the next partSmile

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thousandmiles

JaeeDevRathore Goldie
JaeeDevRathore
JaeeDevRathore

Joined: 21 September 2010
Posts: 1046

Posted: 07 January 2011 at 11:41pm | IP Logged
Sajjal ... Your story is beautiful and never even think that we would doubt on your words. I have read "Maybe" and the concept is a bit similar but the story is entirely different ... The way of writing is different and in no way I would believe that YOU of all the people would do such a thing ... You are a wonderful writer and friend and I have my full faith over your words ... So just relax ...

And now coming back to this story - It's beautiful ... The way you have shone Nupur's pain .. the dilemma ... the immense pain ... the stubborn nature and the grief  ... everything is so apt and perfect .... But you know what, I somehow support Mayank in the abortion of that child - I know I sound cruel and a lot of people would hate me for saying this ... But if the parents are not ready to have a child, it's best to not bring her to life and torture her and make her feel unwanted ... If the child is unwanted how would the parents be able to give her the love she deserves ... Maybe at that time he wasn't ready to have a kid and when he is not ready for the responsibilities of becoming a father - it's better he doesn't become one .... He wouldn't have been able to take care or fulfill the duties of a father and this would have been even more painful - not just to the child, but to him and to Nupur as well ...

But this doesn't mean I don't sympathize with Nupur ... I support her too because she was ready to have a child - her heart had moulded into a mother's heart and it would have been terrible to kill that baby .... 

But the way you are presenting the whole scenario, it's so natural and so real ... I am loving this story so much .... Amazing work SajjalClap


Edited by -jaee- - 07 January 2011 at 11:43pm

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-ISakuraS- IF-Sizzlerz
-ISakuraS-
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Joined: 02 December 2010
Posts: 12360

Posted: 08 January 2011 at 12:14am | IP Logged

Sorry for the late comments'been sick.

Part 1

-Wow! What an amazing beginning! I love sad stories but I always hope there is a happy ending. (So please make it a happy ending'just a req. thank u)

I feel so bad for Nupur..her marriage is broken and now her daughter is sick and she needs to go back to that one person, who broke her heart and also might take away her daughter. I understand her hesitation to go ask him for help.

Poor Khushi' Like most children, she wants a happy family too but she is not old enough to understand why her papa doesn't come to see her.

U have wrote the part with Mayur meeting very beautifully'her hesitation to go in and the house is still kept to her liking'Mayank's initial shock, his anger, bitter convo about their separation and then finally the news of their sick child.

I think Mayank still wants her back'gives me some hope for their reunion..

Can't wait to read the next part (and I don't need to..it's posted already'running to read that)



Edited by Ishita16 - 08 January 2011 at 12:15am

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thousandmilesstuti123

Faria. IF-Sizzlerz
Faria.
Faria.

Joined: 30 January 2009
Posts: 22923

Posted: 08 January 2011 at 12:20am | IP Logged

Hey Sajjal
i read ur 2nd part
and i must say u have beautifully written the whole part
yah at first it was quite similar  to Adis FF
but now i hav found its  different one.

u r an amazing writer and we alwz love ur writing
the way u portrayed nups character was just awesome.
i can understand her situation.
and about  mayanks char - i dont want to comment  now
after reading some update- i'll give my opinion.

awesome update saj- fantastic as usual
keep it up


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thousandmiles

sumonetolub IF-Rockerz
sumonetolub
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Joined: 02 August 2005
Posts: 7421

Posted: 08 January 2011 at 12:26am | IP Logged
nice fanfic!.....i like the ones that think out of the box and arent the usual....and i hope you update fast!.......naina

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thousandmiles

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Posts: 12360

Posted: 08 January 2011 at 12:34am | IP Logged
Part 2
U've portrayed Nupur's character well

…Nupur blaming Mayank for their daughter's sickness… though it is not right, it is one of those natural things

….then denying the fact that something might happen to her…mother's heart can never accept that something will happen to their child

….then the whole questioning of herself in front of her mirror as to why she had the sindoor and mangalsutra…shows how much Mayank had hurt her and that she was no longer the same Nupur and it would be hard for her to forget the last 5 years

…imagining Khushi…shows the two sides of Nupur (the doctor who knows what will happen and the mother trying to convince herself that it won't happen to her daughter)

…not wanting to have another child with him…shows how much relationship has soured in the past and the innocent Nupur who doesn't want to be hurt again..also shows her stubborn nature.

…Thanking Mayank for the tablet…shows that though she may be stubborn and in denial, but her heart still trusts Mayank and his decision…also shows her vulnerable side that knows the true state of her daughter.

Mayur's past is kind of scaring me. Did Mayank have an extramarital affair? I really hope not…it is not something that can be forgiven in my pov. I don't know, I can never forgive someone who had an extramarital affair and I really hope it's not something like that.

Pls continue soon.

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thousandmilesstuti123

stuti123 IF-Sizzlerz
stuti123
stuti123

Joined: 18 April 2008
Posts: 24065

Posted: 08 January 2011 at 12:57am | IP Logged
amazing update sajjal ..i was eagerly waiting for the update............ loved it.....poor nupur i  really want to know what has mayank done in the past which has hurt nupur soo much.... i hope their is know extra maritial affiar involved  .............she is so heart broken .......
 
and i feel bad for mayank too....5 yrs have passed but still his love for nupur is still the same .......
 nd for the sake of their daughter he had to take dat step...........nd the note which he he left for nupur in the end .......i was almost in tears reading it..........
 
cant wait to read the next part.......do update soon ...nd u need not be sorry abt anything......sajjal........the concept of ur ff might be similar to adi's maybe but ur  style of writing nd the way u are potraying this story  is very different from hers .........
 
do continue soon .....cat wait to read the next part......


Edited by stuti123 - 08 January 2011 at 12:58am

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